AMA With Red Pill Mods SoftHarem and RedPillSchool, ask us anything.

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December 21, 2013

/u/redpillschool and /u/softharem reporting in for questions. Need quick advice? Have a question for us? Whatever, ask away.

Edit: RPS headed out for a bit. I'll check back and answer more if I see them.

Post Information
Title AMA With Red Pill Mods SoftHarem and RedPillSchool, ask us anything.
Author redpillschool
Upvotes 66
Comments 167
Date 21 December 2013 05:01 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
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Red Pill terms found in post:
the red pill

[–]quickquestionfor19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy

Would you consider opening the subreddit traffic stats up for public view? It is an easy to do option as stated by a reddit admin a few months back(see quote below). It would be interesting to see traffic spikes and growth due to the ROK and second most hated subreddit events.

"Moderators may now choose to set their subreddit's traffic statistics page (e.g. /r/changelog/about/traffic[1] ) publicly visible by checking the "make the traffic stats page available to everyone" checkbox in subreddit settings." which then shows basic statistics like views, subs and etc over time.

Also would it be possible to update and/or have some more manosphere links and maybe a quick blurb about their focus? I think it would help people new to the TRP that want more tailored advice to their situation. Like dalrock speaks to family and religious TRP values vs redpillroom who speaks to more traditional values vs ROK's anything and everything approach. Some other good blogs are also out there as well like thumotic and illimatable man's new blog to just name a quick couple.

Thanks and you guys are doing an awesome job all around and good work keeping this sub's signal to noise ratio high.

[–]hermit0878 points9 points  (3 children) | Copy

What are the odds of this sub surviving, say for another two years, without being shut down by reddit? It already has a big bulls eye painted on it, and all it would take is one scandal/story being picked up by the mainstream media(like RoK recently).

Its true there are other sites it could move to, but I think it would never be the same.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

As a follow-on: do the SRS types actually hate us that much more than they hate MensRights? Because I don't get the sense that their hatred is any less intense for the MRAs, and if MensRights hasn't been banned then I wouldn't be to worried about TRP

They've experienced explosive growth just like we have, they have plenty of "misogyny" for SRSters to take blow out of context and proportion, and they're 3 times our size...I would think they would get the hammer before we do.

I know /r/niggers got banned, but I suspect banning is much easier to pull off (in the political sense) when the sub has a name that a lot of folks see as offensive/derogatory.

[–]ThePrince_0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

MensRights advocates for the rights of men. TRP advocates a sexual strategy for men.

You tell me which is easier misconstrue...

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

MensRights advocates for the rights of men.


TRP advocates a sexual strategy for men.


/s of course

Yeah, huge difference. But in typing this, I think I just realized the basic difference between MRAs and TRPers in a radfem's eyes...

To SRS, TRPers are open rapists, while MRAs are facilitating said "rape" by being "rape apologists", whatever the hell that means.

To us, the difference between MR and TRP is large, but the difference to a radfem is like the difference between post-modern feminism and liberal feminism to us.

To them, we're all neckbeard rapist patriarchs, and to us they're all fat, bitchy, and want revenge for oppressions that never happened. Neither side generally has any love for (or knowledge of) any of the subgroups in the other camp.

Wikipedia list of types of feminism that I pulled those two from

[–][deleted] 23 points23 points | Copy

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[–]MSoftHarem32 points33 points  (3 children) | Copy

How much do you guys bench?

Not enough.

How much do you squat?

Not enough.

How long have been practicing game?


Best advice you've ever recieved?

Don't listen to what women say, watch what they do.

[–]malignantbacon4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't listen to what women say, watch what they do.

Fair to say this is applicable to people in general. Talk is cheap.

[–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

Not enough.

Great fucking answer :) I always feel that way.

[–]UnpluggedMaestro0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's never enough, for Brodin always demands more.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 22 points23 points  (27 children) | Copy

I started working out just around the time I got involved in this sub, which is probably why you never see me giving out fitness advice and defer to more knowledgable users. I'm benching 150/12ish at this point, and around 225/12 squatting.

I started learning about game about three years ago, really ramped up my game two years ago, and now consider most game attitudes second nature at this point. Swallowing the red pill over the past two years really helped me internalize and understand what was going on.

Best advice I ever received was back in my blue pill days, a friend of mine was getting divorce raped and he said to me, "never ever get married. I don't care how much you love her, there's no reason to get the state involved. This is what happens when the state gets involved."

I put it on the back burner and kinda heeded his advice for a while, until eventually the red pill came along and put it into context for me.

[–]jimmy_legs5 points6 points  (8 children) | Copy

What's your lifting routine/program like? Just curious, because you would likely see better improvement if you followed a program that gives you something more than a 12 rep max. Training for strength would be beneficial if your lifts are still that low. After you're decently strong, you can mess around with the bro split nonsense that you're probably on.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] -4 points-3 points  (7 children) | Copy

Multiple sets

[–]jimmy_legs3 points4 points  (6 children) | Copy

That's your program?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

I was on my phone, I see nothing wrong with multiple sets of 12 reps. I do 4 at a weight I can complete at least 10-12, and then up it until I can't do 6.

[–]jimmy_legs2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

There's nothing wrong with that, it's just not optimal. There's no progression or real thought behind it. If you followed an actual program that coincides with your goals, then you'd see significantly better results.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I've seen many schools of thought but no concrete evidence that more reps lower sets provides any additional benefit.

[–]jimmy_legs0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

That's not what I said, but if we're arguing that too then fewer reps at a higher weight will definitely build strength more than sets of 12+ reps at a lower weight.

But what I was originally saying is that you don't have a plan. That's why so many people go to the gym to "work out" but end up getting nowhere. There are plenty of beginner strength programs that allow you to slowly increase the weight on the bar each training session. Once you build a solid strength base, you'll be able to train for hypertrophy more efficiently (if that's your goal).

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's awfully presumptuous to assume I don't follow a plan. Don't give advice when it wasn't solicited.

[–][deleted] -5 points-5 points | Copy

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[–]Modredpillschool[S] 12 points13 points  (16 children) | Copy

Everybody starts somewhere.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (13 children) | Copy

Any tips for how to increase your squat? I have been lifting for 5 months and bench has gone from 100/10 to 150/12, my squat has gone from 80/10 to 140/12. In my workouts I bench just as much as I squat in terms of sets. I have skinny legs but they are not that disproportionate.

What do you think about testosterone replacement? I have been doing it for 3 months now.

[–]blazingblue164 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Work on the big 6 for strength before you go into bodybuilding. Squat, Deadlift, Bench, Overhead Press, Barbell Rows, Pull ups. Less reps, heavier lift. 255 for 5, 270 for 5 125 for 5 @ 133 lbs respective to my ordering of words.

Proper form and always squat.

[–]BleLLL4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

/r/weightroom read the faq, do SS or SL.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well first thing to do is adjust your form. For me, wide stance lets me lift heavier and is easier on the back. Then I would look into a PHAT protocol. It sounds like you're only doing high rep for size, but it's important to also have a heavy day, low rep for strength. Here's what my program looks like (a hybrid between StrongLifts 5x5 and All Pro's Beginner Routine).

Monday: Heavy day. Squat 5x5 + warmup, Bench 5x5 + warmup, Row 3x5, Deadlift 1x5 + warmup or more depending on how much energy I have that day.

Wednesday/Friday: High Red Day with less weight. Squat 2xi + warmup, Bench 2xi + warmup, Row 2xi, Upright Row 2xi, Barbell Curls 2xi, Deadlifts/Romanian 2xi, where i = 8,9,10,11,12 then repeat cycle with higher weights.

This helped me get my squat to 200 at 5x5 currently on heavy day, and I just did 165 at 2x12 yesterday. It works well for me on keto, I can consistently add 5lbs per week to all my heavy exercises.

You might wonder why there's no overhead press - I have a shoulder injury so I do upright rows to target my shoulders instead. I do what I can...

[–][deleted] 4 points4 points | Copy

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[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

He'd likely be better off posting a formcheck to /r/weightroom in one of their Friday threads. Here's the most recent one

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks. I was diagnosed by a doctor as having low testosterone, it wasn't something I went off and did on my own. What is butt wink??

[–]Catliketheif861 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Starting Strength is your best bet by Mark Rippletoe. You will see huge gains in your strength capacities by following his program. He is also essentially the bible for go to exercises, how to program, and has dozens of pages depicting correct form and what you should be feeling.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

It got my squat from 40kg to 157.5 kg in about 8 months.
edit* From around 90lbs to 350lbs for reps.

[–][deleted] 0 points0 points | Copy

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[–]1Zackcid0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Can you tell me a bit about the importance of 3 workouts per week? I'm a beginner and find it a little strange that you wouldn't go more frequently to the gym if you've got the free time and energy. What's even more strange to me is:

Most guys are guilty of one "leg day" per week

Why can't they squeeze in a 5 minute squatting and other leg workout during one of those days? Any tips are appreciated.

[–]Jon_Tren_Yin1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

The reason for 3 workouts per week is to give your body the chance to recover and rebuild, where the "real" muscle growth occurs, since going to the gym only tears the muscles down.

If you go to the gym and hit the same muscle groups too extensively (especially as a beginner) it isn't optimal. Instead, solid workouts followed by solid rest will produce the best result, as well as not psychologically burning you out quicker.

If you have all the free time in the world, feel free to go more often as long as you provide your body adequate rest in between workouts. Also, when your body becomes more experienced, adding in more days to switch up your routine can also be beneficial

[–]1Zackcid0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for the tips!

[–][deleted] 3 points3 points | Copy

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[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How many hours/day do you spend on moderating the sub?

Way too many. lol

Do either of you plan on writing a book or conducting seminars? I vaguely remember reading that SoftHarem was "coaching" people at some point.

I'm working on a book right now.

Upon approaching, how do you filter to see if a girl is worth you investing more or if you should next her and move to another?

I have a low tolerance for bitch shields. Seddit says break through it, but I say- if she's bitchy to strangers, then fuck her.

Are most of your bangs same night lays or do they happen after some dates? Do you find it more effective to daygame, instant date/number, or to night game 3+ times a week, with the goal being an SNL?

I don't usually do same-night bangs a la roosh. I day game, get numbers, get drinks, then bang. I attempt to get them into the rotating harem, which I try to keep at least 3 plates spinning.

At least where I live, night game is terrible, and I think takes 300% more effort because you have a higher flake rate if you don't bang in the bathroom within minutes. Fuck that shit, I'm getting too old for clubs.

[–]TRP VanguardYouDislikeMyOpinion12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy

I just wanted to thank you both for doing an amazing job with this subreddit. You've poured a lot of sweat and blood into it, and it has developed into something much more amazing than even I expected.

I think I speak on behalf of everyone here at TRP when I say that we appreciate what all the mods here do for our community.

P.S. The new icons look awesome.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]magicalbird2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

What do you think about the madonna vs whore complex?

It seems like everyone on /r/theredpill has a huge hatred of whores when those are the ones that put out easily that makes sex easier. If you don't marry them and preferably don't LTR them what's the point of such a big complex running around on /r/theredpill that goes against making sex and therefore sexual strategy easier?

[–]1Zackcid0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy


I'm curious about this as well. I'm suspecting that most of the hatred directed towards these 'sluts' is tied to the fact that it may indicate that the woman is less loyal than her prude counterpart if we're talking LTR. A non insecure man wouldn't even be worried about this.

[–]magicalbird0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

It prevents newbies from advancing their sexual success if they keep reinforcing the complex

Of course it occurs because most men want women to be sluts only for themselves

[–]1Zackcid0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–]Modredpillschool[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

There's nothing wrong with sluts- it's the attitude they have when they hit the wall wondering "where are all the good men??"

Don't slut it up and expect somebody to pay top dollar for what you've given out for free.

[–]1Zackcid3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

How many true mods do we have anyway? I'm looking at the list down there and see some names that I've never seen. One is even an endorsed contributor and he's in the mods list.

Who are the mods exactly?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

We have seven mods, all selected from our community by myself.

[–]Furyk_Karede4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

What are your opinions on the blue pill and purple pill debate subreddits?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Blue pill is interesting to me. I could understand a group of people being so angry at us they start a sub to talk about it, but nothing will make me understand people willingly hanging around and contributing in a sub of people talking like children, using fake words, and calling themselves a circle jerk. It's unproductive and something you'd only take part in if you've got nothing else to do with your life.

PPD is a guilty pleasure of mine, but amounts to nothing more than arguing with idiots. I had a thread there the other day asking if they understood men have a harder time getting laid than women, and they wouldn't quite acknowledge that. I'm not sure how you can get anywhere in a debate if they're starting at such a poor understanding.

[–]16 MGaiusScaevolus8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

Who is currently your favorite Red Pillesque thinker/writer? Which of the RP blogs do you read most regularly? What goal(s) are you working on right now to improve your life in the next 6 months.

Also, good job with sub guys. Keep it up.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Rollo is my fave. I frequent Rationalmale, alpha game, dalrock, m3, matt forney, puerarchy, random xpat rantings, return of kings, roosh v, the private man, the red pill room, and chateau heartiste.

[–]redpill_man9 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy

Question 1: I've been seeing more and more MR stuff on the sub lately (although looking at the front page today it looks ok). I actually unsubbed from them after I realized what a bunch of whiny bitches they are. I'm not gonna lie I hate seeing the MR stuff here. Do you guys think it takes away from the this sub, or are you ok with it?

Question 2: Seeing how just about everyone hates us, do you think this sub-reddit can survive long term?

[–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

MR has turned into shit because it was invaded and overtaken by egalitarians. A lot of MR members shifted here because old MRA types recognize that seeking impossible equality is the problem. As such, as long as the MRA stuff here doesn't become the main focus, I think it does add to the sub.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

MR affects us whether you like it or not. We needed a place where we can talk openly about things that affect our sexual strategy, and /r/mensrights is not that place. You can always filter out men's rights material by filtering flairs. Click the buttons at the top of the page.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (12 children) | Copy

I know there are many, for example 16 commandments of poon by CH, but which three basic principles of RP are your favorites?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 24 points25 points  (9 children) | Copy

Understanding hypergamy, shit testing, and proper frame control are basically all you need to get out there.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (7 children) | Copy

Is there a TRP approved list of common shit tests and how to handle them best? If not, would you consider making it? I find myself missing them sometimes and only realizing afterwards.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 12 points13 points  (6 children) | Copy

[–]TRP Vanguardscottishredpill8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Another resource:

Edit: Meant to reply directly, doh

[–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Speaking of shit tests, are you planning on adding the term "shit test" to the glossary?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I didn't? I'll do it eventually.

[–]RejectionEquality 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

What about the other 2 basic principles?

[–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–]jmikolash-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Awesome. I'm somewhat new and whenever I'm dealing with women I've been exclusively focusing on holding frame and passing shit tests. Good to hear I'm on the right track.

[–]MSoftHarem10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

You are free to choose any sexual strategy that fits your desired lifestyle.

You are 100% responsible for the overall success of any relationship you have with a woman.

This is a repeat, but its that important: Do not listen to what women say, watch what they do.

[–]Walderschmidt3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

While I agree with the sentiment "you are 100% responsible" - I believe it is important to acknowledge that it "takes two to tango". At the very least, keep this in mind so that you don't beat yourself up too much for mistakes you make. Live and learn.


[–][deleted] 3 points3 points | Copy

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[–]Experfied2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I know this question wasn't for me, but in all honesty 99% of the time fights happen i see two guys getting all emotional and amped up. I think it shows weakness, you can't take what's coming to you without going crazy and it shows that you are not in control of the situation. You as a man should know what you are and be confident with it, and when someone tries to disparage that you only prove them right by feeding into it when you go nuts. Seriously WORDS are hurting you, and that to me is some serious weakness. If someone calls me a bitch, i don't get mad, because I know that i'm not a bitch. knomsayin?

You should only fight if you have to, and not to ''prove a point''.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I wouldn't fight somebody for attacking my honor. Somebody attacking my honor must be below me trying to get social leverage, why would I bother myself with the ramblings of an underling?

[–]Drvibe0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

this was put nicely

[–]Moroten893 points4 points  (9 children) | Copy

How did you discover red pill?

[–]MSoftHarem20 points21 points  (1 child) | Copy

"Dated" dozens and dozens of women throughout my 20s. Found myself in a relationship with an extremely high maintenance 9+ and decided I had enough of tolerating their nonsense. Started naturally applying RP concepts and noticed a change in her behavior. I wasn't able to keep frame with any consistency, but the times I did it was amazing. After we broke-up I found Reddit, started going into all the gender relevant subreddits and doing my homework. I couldn't believe how most people behaved, and I certainly had never met any women like the ones who frequent the more popular female subs. After being banned from almost every popular sub I got an orangered from PK_Atheist inviting me to TheRedPill. I read all the material like a heroin addict and finally had a framework that explained my dating life. The rest is history.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If it was 50, or 100 years ago, would you call it RP or would you call it normal common sense, or something else?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 6 points7 points  (6 children) | Copy

I was really frustrated with an experience I had with a woman, and couldn't understand why nobody noticed her stark hypocrisy. I felt like I was taking crazy pills. She was regarded as perfect and honorable as a princess would be, but ultimately she was just a narcissist. I couldn't understand why she wasn't being held to the same standards I was. In fact, I started realizing this was a pattern with a lot of women I had interacted with.

I googled, "why are women so narcissistic" and stumbled across a blog post that had links to other blogs. It was my first experience in the manosphere and I never looked back.

The site was but he blocked access to it a while back.

[–]blazingblue163 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

I made the mistake of calling one out for it. Holy shit the social backlash. She lied and said stuff I never said on a facebook status, and she cherry picked a meaning for narcissism. I've never seen so many white knights and gurlfriend support. It's like they don't take a second to acknowledge the probability that she's lying or misrepresenting the details on purpose.

And to fill the narcissism even more, it was a post excluding my name, so the entire point was to fish for compliments,likes, validation, and reaffirming her hamster.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You mean the one who loved somebody else more than she loved you?

[–]blazingblue160 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

what are you talking about? This was about someone I met. Didn't like her attitude and the way she was talking to me and foolishly got angry about it. I really should have ignored it.

[–]Kwizkey 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

Aaahhhh just reading this pissed me off! A nice reminder to not call out girls on their shit.

[–]blazingblue16-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think you can do it, but only 1 on 1 in person with solid frame.

[–]1Zackcid-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

You should actively call them out on their shit. Not any guy is capable of doing it; you gotta maintain a strong frame the entire time (she'll be looking into your eyes for signs of weakness!!) and exude confidence and experience, while being firm with your thoughts.

Any guy who tries to call a girl out while being wish-washy, indecisive, outcome-dependent will get smashed to pieces.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Thoughts on real social dynamics? Specifically tyler?

[–]MSoftHarem1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Not my style.

[–]gurglemel1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

We always hear of people who complain about circumstance before their own behavior, but I still can't decide on whether or not I should move out for a better social life and independence...mostly because I need cash for a company I'm trying to start

[–]Oniichan_Overload1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Do you generally feel society is moving in a positive, or negative social direction, and why ? If negative do you feel people such as us have any responsibility to try, and correct it.

[–]Brotagonist_011 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I know that this wasnt for me, but yes. Society is moving in a negative direction. The reason, social media sites, where you have no privacy, you are always connected, and you really have no separate space for you to collect your thoughts about people and ideas.

Just a constant bombardment of useless/stupid information. This has really done a number on the youth (anyone below 30 today) and especially the women of this era.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

USA is headed for economic turmoil, and I think it's entirely the secret gender war nobody is talking about. Gotta keep them happy and breeding, and if they don't, society fails.

[–]rugbytitsandmedicine1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

How tall are you guys, how much do you weigh, what is your body fat %

What is your yearly income.


[–]1Zackcid0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

lel :]

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points | Copy

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[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Date? No. Bang, yes.

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points | Copy

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[–]Modredpillschool[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Start hitting the gym while you're young. I fucking wish I had that advice back then.

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points | Copy

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[–]Modredpillschool[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Stoicism is good frame control.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

Could you guys describe the difference between red pill and PUA? Or are they very similar?

[–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

I would say that for the vast majority of the posters here, they are very similar. It's about how to get laid. But the approach is different. In PUA, you learn lines, approaches, techniques. In TRP, there is some focus on that, but the overall focus is turning yourself into a guy which is naturally attractive to women (strong, dominant, successful).

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

So as I understand it, TRP is more about learning to be confident, picking up skills and interesting hobbies, making yourself interesting, where PUA is like mechanics/specifics of pickup?

[–]TRP Vanguard: "Dark Triad Expert"IllimitableMan0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, TRP is internalisation, PUA is mechanisation.

PUA types can come off very weird/irritating/off to the girls they're approaching because it seems so unnatural. Don't personally recommend any PUA shit.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Seddit doesn't try to understand why certain game works.

[–]Drvibe0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

whats your stance on kino?

[–]still_very_alive3 points4 points  (12 children) | Copy

Are there any Red Pill concepts in general you don't agree with? Say, things that get tossed around here that you don't really think is true?

How important do you see women, and sex, to a RP lifestyle?

Also, how old are the two of you?

Are there any surveys done about the demographics of the people here?

[–]MSoftHarem7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

Are there any Red Pill concepts in general you don't agree with? Say, things that get tossed around here that you don't really think is true?

Straw Red Pill

How important do you see women, and sex, to a RP lifestyle?

Equally important as raising your value.

Also, how old are the two of you?

Early 30s

Are there any surveys done about the demographics of the people here?

No, and we don't feel it is relevant. RP theory is for anyone regardless of age, sex, religion, ethnicity, and for that matter sexual orientation. Granted, most of the sexual strategy theory revolves around men pursuing women but we get feedback about it also working with gays and bi-sexuals.

[–]still_very_alive1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks. Liked the SRP thing; hadn't come across it before, though I would say I never really needed it (beyond realising what most RP critics thought of RP).

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 6 points7 points  (9 children) | Copy

Are there any Red Pill concepts in general you don't agree with? Say, things that get tossed around here that you don't really think is true?

I don't like the stupid attitude that this is about self-improvement. It's not, it's about sex. Sex is the destination and self-improvement is our transportation. Some guys try to act holier than others by saying "i don't care about the sex bro, it's about this and that and what not" I think it's chest thumping, really. We're wired to feel good about things that make us better at getting sex.

How important do you see women, and sex, to a RP lifestyle?

I have a high libido and feel really shitty if I go more than a week without at least have one plate spinning .

Also, how old are the two of you?

30 +-2 years

Are there any surveys done about the demographics of the people here?

We haven't done any officially.

[–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't like the stupid attitude that this is about self-improvement. It's not, it's about sex. Sex is the destination and self-improvement is our transportation.

To me, it is about self improvement... about ripping away the bullshit and seeing the real reality underneath and using that to better one's self however he desires.

If said person wants to use it for obtaining sex, then that is their goal and I wish them all the success in the world. If they want to use it for advancing their career, I wish them all the success in the world. If they want to..... You get the idea.

Hell, I use a lot of this for getting sex, and I'm 90% MGTOW. It doesn't make me right or wrong, it makes me me.

But what I'm ultimately getting at is that this is TRP, not PUA 2.0. TRP applies to so much more than just getting sex, so if someone's main focus is outside of getting sex they can still learn a lot from TRP.

[–]Brotagonist_011 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't like the stupid attitude that this is about self-improvement. It's not, it's about sex. Sex is the destination and self-improvement is our transportation.

Man, I'm glad that you said it! Because it seems to be a bunch of circle-jerky arguments as to the true nature of TRP. It's as if some come here and read just a little bit and start making shit up as to what their definition of TRP is.

Thank you for clarifying.

[–]still_very_alive2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Thank you. Interesting take on the self-improvement vs sex thing. It's certainly something I've seen quite a lot of, though I'm rather more ambivalent about it.

Would you consider doing such a survey? I know many like SoftHarem up there would say it's not important, and I get where they're coming from, but I think it would be interesting.

[–]QualityControlled3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

There's no need to survey. This shit needs to stay guerrilla. Insurgent, even.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I don't really have any plans to do it. maybe in the future

[–]CptDefB2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy


  • What are your suggestions on turning a commonly perceived weakness into a valuable strength in regards to Game?
  • Any suggestions on how to deal with a pervasive "just-don't-give-enough-of-a-fuck" feeling when it comes to approaching tens of dozens of women, solely for the purpose of getting laid? I mean... I do love sex very much, probably more than I love the gender I have sex with, I'm just tired of dealing with their shit.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

What are your suggestions on turning a commonly perceived weakness into a valuable strength in regards to Game?

Own it. Wear it as a badge. Be proud of it.

Unless it's something you can fix. Then fucking fix it.

[–]LeRedPill1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Do you think being physically defined in a way you can only become through a gym membership is important, or does it not matter as long as you're slim and well groomed.

Personally I hate physical exercise, but I watch what I eat and have a slim to medium body type. It doesn't seem to cause me any issues at all, but I wonder whether I'd have even more success if I was more defined with larger muscles.

[–]MSoftHarem11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Muscles crush shit-tests, both figuratively and literally.

[–]Dubstyles 0 points0 points [recovered] | Copy

I understand what shit tests are but when i'm with a girl i have trouble recognizing when she throws them at me. Am i missing something?

[–]phx-au3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

If your first instinct is have to think about the answer to not "get it wrong", then it is a shit test.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's difficult to learn them so they're second nature. I found myself failing shit tests and only realizing what they were afterwards. Just takes time and study. Analyze past experiences with women. Think about your interactions. Anything that sticks out as .. feeling a little funny, really critique it, pull it apart and think about what you did, what you could've done, why she said what she did, and why you did. Bounce ideas on /r/asktrp. The more you do it, the more you'll internalize it.

[–]blazingblue160 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The common ones tend to be questions like are you a player? Do you always do this to girls? When was the last time you had a relationship?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

1 week into red pill, really keen and been pushing myself heaps to improve.

What kind of places or things did you do, that you felt accelerated the process of improvement?

I've been going to clubs, going to the gym and plan on using to meet strangers. Any other you found beneficial?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I would recommend avoiding clubs.

Gym is good. Coffee shops, quiet bars. Emphasis on quiet bars. I'm a conversationalist at heart. My game is words.

[–]Flaydogg0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

I don't know if it is too late to post, but I'll give it a shot. Can you respectfully and logically explain what TRP has against single mothers? Allow me to re-phrase that, is TRP against single mothers? I would like to avoid making an actual post over this question in order to avoid trolling. This is an honest question, by the way. I'm just curious.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

Single mothers are a good place to look if you're hopelessly bad at picking up women.. in a sense it's desperate people looking for desperate people. But for most self respecting men, the idea of raising somebody elses seed makes you a giant sap.

[–]Flaydogg0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Surely this doesn't apply to all single mothers. Could there possibly be a few of the bunch that aren't desperate? I mean, let us not generalize here. But I do see what you are saying. I personally wouldn't want to raise someone elses child either.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

If you had a choice between a woman with a child, or one without, a lot of guys opt for the one without. This makes women with children more desperate, and often shopping for a daddy, not a boyfriend/hookup.

[–]Flaydogg-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Not all of us are desperate. I am sure that many are. But I personally prefer to stay single than to require those things (like a daddy for my kid) or become desperate. He has a dad. That is no one's job but that of the man the helped create him.

When I look for a partner, I don't have the objective of trying to force someone into some kind of role that they aren't into already. If I am looking, then I'm looking for a companion or a partner who is just someone to spend my life with, not someone to "fix" what is "missing" in the home. At this point in my life, finding someone is a bonus, not a requirement. It would be nice, but I'm not hell-bent on settling down again or hooking up (I was never into hooking up in the first place). I guess what I'm saying is that the TRP stereotypes don't fit everyone.

I joined the sub because I support the stay-at-home and work-in-the-home wife while the husband provides and works outside of the home type of situation. My life didn't end up that way. I still want it, but I know I have shit for a chance at it. I'm not even trying, but if I were to get lucky and find that, I certainly wouldn't turn it down. It is a shame that my type of situation isn't conducive for making this lifestyle happen for me, but I still believe in it, even if I can't have it. I still support this sub, even if it despises me. But thank you for answering my question honestly, I appreciate it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think it is more like 20% of single moms have good reason for being so, and 80% did something either selfish or stupid.

And the worst thing is, take a totally innocent one like someone who divorced an abusive, aggressive asshole. She will be traumatized. Do you really want to play psychiatrist? Sure if you already love someone you help her through her issues but to specifically seek out a stranger who needs help and form a difficult relationship... that is like unrealistically saintly. Few men would be as unselfish as to do that.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

There are all sorts of cases, but the typical, majority case is a woman who either did something stupid or selfish to end up like that. Sure, sure, there are many exceptions. So it should be seen as a heuristic. Not like being all prejudicial with people and totally rejecting all single moms before knowing the first thing about them...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

What are your views on women? I've been lurking for a bit and I see a lot of guys in the comments saying things like "women are retarded". Do you agree with that kind of view?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I like women

[–]higherstandard0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

What is the best piece advice you would give to a 22 year old male just getting into medical school and unplugged?

[–]Jon_Tren_Yin0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Chiming in here randomly, but honestly, I think you should focus 100% on your schooling as that's really important especially for medical school. If it was another degree (something arbitrary like sociology) I wouldn't feel the same way, but Medical School is a huge privilege.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

A few links on /r/becomeaman have become inactive and outdated. Any plans on grouping everything together and updating it for future use?

[–]Drvibe0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What role do RPS and Softharem think kino plays in the seduction process? Do you guys agree with the PUA terming of it or do you think its creepy? ( of course it depends on context.....)

[–]IRC Mod-Anteros-0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

*What is the difference between Red Pill Examples and Field Reports, also why do we have a Mens Rights section?
*Are we spreading ourselves too thin with all this?
*Where do you see the community in the next 5 years?
*Can you put The Flowchart on the sidebar ?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

Red pill examples are examples of men embracing and practicing a red pill life style but they're not you.

Field reports are hopefully reports of testing theory in the field.

We have a men's rights section because I believe the mens rights topics affect us whether we like it or not, and we need a place to discuss it without worrying about being PC.

Where do you see the community in the next 5 years?

It's hard to predict one year. I didn't see us hitting 26,000 subscribers but here we are. I suspect in the next few years we'll see larger groups break into more sub-factions focusing on particulars like MGTOW and such. I definitely see us becoming more main stream.

The flow chart is nice but needs a little work before I think it's sidebar material.

[–]MSoftHarem8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

*What is the difference between Red Pill Examples and Field Reports

This should be self-explanatory, but I'll indulge. Red Pill examples are any examples of Red Pill thinking out in the wild, and while they may be related to sexual strategy, they don't have to be. Field Reports are success stories when men apply RP concepts and find success in attracting women.

also why do we have a Mens Rights section?

Because this tends to be a natural progression into RP thinking, and there is a bit of crossover between the two communities. RPS and myself started in AskMen/MensRights/Seddit, and once we were no longer able to tolerate the lack of responsibility we started TRP.

*Are we spreading ourselves too thin with all this?


*Where do you see the community in the next 5 years?

Making a fist sized hole in our feminized culture.

*Can you put The Flowchart[1] on the sidebar ?


[–]Senior Contributordeepthrill0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Softharem: We discussed this briefly in IRC the other day, but I'm hoping you can expand upon the idea that everything we preach eventually comes down to sexual strategy, and that self improvement is a by-product, or is ultimately just used to get sex with higher quality women.

I'm not sure I agree, but you seem pretty adamant about that point.

What about MGTOW?

I believe you said something along the lines of the world is driven by the desire for sex. That other things can give you happiness, but ultimately it's sex which matters.

Forgive me if I am misquoting you, but I think you get the general sentiment I'm asking.

[–]MSoftHarem9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

While this may sound a bit cliche, the Oscar Wilde quote is very relevant here.

“Everything in the world is about sex except sex. Sex is about power.”

Men are hardwired to spread their seed, and that genetic desire has driven the human race to the top of the food chain, and built civilizations for thousands of years. Even in modern times with raw masculinity being somewhere between tolerated and condemned, we still have those same instinctual urges. Sex is a byproduct of being a high value man, but it is also our main drive as men so it would be foolish to not believe it as a primary goal. Think of it like you would a profession. You go to school, learn a trade, etc. and the byproduct is money. Sure, all the knowledge and experience you gain along the way is extremely important, but that doesn't keep the lights on. Same thing for sex, it is the ultimate validation of your value as an attractive masculine man.

MGTOW are their own variation of Red Pill thinking and not necessarily relevant to us. Their sexual strategy is opting out of society, and often dating altogether. This is their choice and they are free to do so, but I feel that stops most self-improvement because they rationalize they don't need women. Denying one's biology is a sure fire way to unhappiness, and something we do not believe in.

[–]HArvey130 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Any experience with South African girls?

[–]MSoftHarem5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Only as neighbors. The couple I knew definitely had a Captain/First Mate dynamic, and he was a strong Alpha male.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I dated one. I liked her accent. She was kind of rude, but whatever.

[–]shakaldrogo-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

haha is jy lief vir 'n Afrikaner?

[–]HArvey130 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Haha nee, ek vind hulle vreemd maar maklik

[–]shakaldrogo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Anything foreign, they eat up. Easily amused, I know, I've lived with them hahaha

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

On the topic of shit testing, which do you think is better, coming up with a witty response, or just being indifferent to them? For example when I'm in a conversation and I spot a shit test, I usually just figuratively "walk past" them. I guess this only works when the shit test is a statement and not a question. But when that is the case I usually say something like "cool" or "oh" and then move on to something else because I feel like coming up with a response requires me to put too much emphasis on the shit test which gives me more of an opportunity to fuck it up. Do you think that wittier responses yield better results?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy

I don't know, depends on your personal style. Are you laid back, or are you quick-witted? One might work for some, but not others.

I personally try to make all shit tests about sex.

“I have a boyfriend.”

Does he like watching, or should we keep this secret?

[–]frequentlywrong0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If I may be so bold as to contribute. If you have a good response to a shit test it will put you in a better position then before the shit test. She will be impressed at you for shutting her down. Sidestepping/ignoring it leaves you at status quo. So if you have a good response, it's a good way to establish your dominance and produce some vagina tingles.

[–]1mrust0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What was the inflection point for you when you changed from accepting TRP intellectually vs actually internalising it?

I find I've really improved at frame control, recognising and dealing with shit tests, setting boundaries, etc...

But I still have to work hard to deal with big picture issues. I feel like I'm still chasing unicorns and though I'm not prone to one-itis anymore, I tend to treat women as friends first, making it difficult to establish a sexual frame. It either happens on the first meet or it never does. Any advice?

Currently I just follow 3 meet rule and next.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Is a girl who is 19, been in a 3 year relationship and had a total partner sex count of 7, too many to consider a ltr?

[–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy

7 by 19????

I wouldn't consider her for an LTR unless other qualities about her were beyond amazing.

But that doesn't mean you can't make her count 8.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

haha I'm her number 7, but there will be many more after me.

But all UK girls that age have the same count if not higher. It's quite annoying.

[–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Remember that just because her partner count is high doesn't mean you have to dump her instantly. Keep screwing her while you find other women to screw.

Unless, of course, you've already offered her commitment/exclusivity. Be a man and stand by your word (dump her before screwing the next).

Actually, shit. Is her 3 year LTR with you?

ETA: Double shit... that means she's been hella busy if she was actually faithful to whichever guy got the 3 year LTR with her. Major red flag. Soft next or dump if the LTR was not with you. If it is, you have a lot of thinking/evaluating to do.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Haha don't worry the ltr isn't me! I have no intention to make her a ltr. Indeed i saw the flag but not bailing yet. But thanks for making it clear buddy.

[–]1 TRP SupporterFred_Flintstone-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

Did you get the number 7 from her? From experience I would guess best case it's 10 worst case 30 or so.

I see many posts on this sub saying bad things about girls with 10+ at age 25. Honestly that is nothing at. How does a girl go about a decade with only 10 guys? Even with 2 four year LTRs it would seem a struggle.

There are a few true good girls though.

[–]SmokeU-5 points-4 points  (4 children) | Copy

I'm a successful athlete. Live in a great waterfront place on the beach. Have a great job. And have lots of skills. However my life has led me to move a lot. I'm alpha of alphas and a lot of times that intimidates other guys to the point they either try a power move (usually fails) or they get pissed and feel insecure. If I met me I would probably feel inadequate. Anyway It ends up with me not having my own tribe and difficulty finding friends to take the boat to the bars. Also I tend to be picky with women and get stuck on one, Very high quality female at a time. American royalty types. However I'm bored and I don't know what my next move should be. Any suggestions?

[–]Nemester10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

a lot of times that intimidates other guys to the point they either try a power move (usually fails) or they get pissed and feel insecure.

No offense, but if you consistently rub other guys the wrong way, the problem is with you and not them.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 21 points22 points  (1 child) | Copy

Be a value giver. Guys will feel more comfortable around you if they feel like they derive good value from you. For instance, make a lot of positive comments when you're around guys, "hey man, that's a really cool shirt.." or "hey you should approach that girl, she's totally into you." It will make guys more comfortable around you.

Ever see the tv show Chuck? There's a character named "awesome." Be that guy.

Don't snipe if you're winging, don't be a dick. You have a clear advantage over other men, so pull it back and let it ride.

[–]SmokeU1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dude great advice. Thanks!

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

I personally think marriage was a man made development. The high leaders of the world knew that if the majority of men didn't have some sort of sex outlet, they would become uncontrollable and bad for their wallets since they won't be working. The leaders got together and basically decided that the beta chumps needed a system to ensure sex was provided and their solution was to develop marriage, which was meant to give the beta chump a chance at getting pussy.

Their plan backfired and everything went to hell.


[–]MSoftHarem9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

All religion is natural law for the masses. Our ancestors saw what happens when men's natural aggression, and women's natural hypergamy is left unbalanced. In order to offer some balance between our natural tendencies the concepts of religion and marriage were created. They've endured thousands of years, and up until feminism derailed us they probably would have endured even longer. The unraveling we are seeing in the west is the same unraveling that every great civilization has gone through when men cede power to women.

[–][deleted] -3 points-3 points | Copy

[permanently deleted]

[–]TRP Vanguard: "Dark Triad Expert"IllimitableMan2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–][deleted] -5 points-4 points  (3 children) | Copy

So I'm on break and 2014 is around the conner. I want to learn more about trp. What posts/comments would you recommend?

I texted a girl to come over, and I still haven't gotten a reply. Should I just delete her number and move on??

Can trp help me with my studies? (Like getting schoolwork done first)

What movies out there that I can watch?

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

Read the sidebar, read it twice. And if you run out of things to read, read the rest of rollo's site,

If a girl doesn't respond to a text, I usually soft-next her for a week (as in forget about her, unless she eventually texts you). If she doesn't, she hits the cleanup at the end of the week (weeding out random numbers, don't forget to clean up your contact list).

Can trp help me with my studies? (Like getting schoolwork done first)

I don't know, maybe?

What movies out there that I can watch?

If you're still not sure about TRP, watch blue valentine.

[–]testerod1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Second that on Blue Valentine... Absolutely devastating movie and saw much of myself in beta married dude until last two months. I couldn't sleep for two nights after watching it... The sex scene in the theme hotel is horrifyingly cringeworthy.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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