Looking for advice from fathers who’ve divorced. Long and short of it is, are you happier now? How much would you be willing to tolerate to avoid divorce?

Im in a situation that is manageable, but less than ideal. There are/were issues, but nothing pressing. I’m unhappy but not miserable, main issues is her complete lack of interest in intimacy and overbearing nature. We have 3 kids, 6,5, and 1 years old, she essentially doesn’t let me be a father to them, always trying to overrule my opinions/wants. She feels that my once a month attempt to have sex with her is too bothersome and that that I am being selfish because I know that she doesn’t want to do it. If she does consent, it’s 5 minutes of missionary with negative body language and an overt sense of “hurry the hell up”. This has been going on for years. So yeah I’m fed up and thinking the grass may be greener elsewhere, not just sexually but emotionally as well.

I recently started making pretty good money, about $136k/year in a LCOL area in Georgia. She hasn’t worked at all in our 7 years of marriage. Bought our house in 2018, before the market went crazy so she’s entitled to half of the $150,000 in equity. I’ll probably have to give her the house because she definitely can’t afford to buy a new one and I don’t want the kids living in a dump. Going off of her opinions about her best friend’s divorce, she doesn’t really believe in alimony and supports 50/50 custody. According to GA I would owe her half of the $2300/month it takes to support the children (based on her $0/year income, subject to change bc she will have to work). I’ll probably have to pay $3k/month I am guessing in actuality, maybe more.

Bottom line, I think a split could be amicable and potentially not crush me financially. I would have to pay more than my “fair share” but I think we’d both be mindful of what’s best for the kids. What I really can’t wrap my head around is how i could make it work being a single dad with a “9-5” type of job.

Like how could school pick up and drop off work, also have a toddler. She will have to get a full time job, likely a shitty one. We have zero family within 1000 miles. I just can’t see logistically how a co-parenting schedule would work. Ideally I think we’d want a week on / week off schedule. The toddler would have to spend their life at day care, other two would need after school care. Not even sure how I would get them to school as I’m supposed to be at work before drop off. Work would likely be somewhat flexible but even with that it seems daunting to juggle 3 kids and a professional job. Childcare seems like it will be $30k+/ year and a huge hassle, not really sure though.

So please, if it’s not that bad let me know. If it’s worse than I even realize, let me know. I don’t want to blow up my family just to be more miserable at the end of it. I don’t want to make my kids suffer just to be in a situation where their parents are even more unhappy. Fought like hell to escape poverty and break into a somewhat middle class situation, feels like I’ll be going straight back to poverty. I’ll make more money down the road, but damn it sucks feeling like I worked this hard to move backwards. It’s not all about sex or money, just a lot of feeling unwanted really. Trying to do a cost/benefit analysis to see if my personal happiness is worth it or even feasible.

Anyway, I could go on, but thanks for reading my rant. Any advice, good , bad, or indifferent is appreciated.