Motivation

retired337 · 2025-09-22T02:02:54+00:00

Dude its not a competition. Your best recourse is to move on and live your best life. Worrying about her and her pos adulterous boyfriend will only hold you back

EnvironmentalAd3558 · 2025-09-19T06:02:49+00:00

Leveling up is a good thing. Keep up the good work. Expand it to other areas in your life.

FacePaster · 2025-09-19T04:26:38+00:00

dude why do you care? are you trying to win her back? if not, then why are you even thinking about her? move on with your life

Code_Green1122BoZo88 · 2025-09-19T04:00:49+00:00

Dude, the way you tried to attack all who disagree or react differently than you shows exactly why she left. It had nothing to do with looks, it's you. You're the problem and losing weight is never going to fix that.

conceptcreature3D · 2025-09-19T03:42:49+00:00

I divorced knowing I deserved better for myself and wasn’t getting it from her. Before I even left her I started the self improvement, knowing a new year was gonna be a new start for me . It took me less than a month out of the house for a hot mutual acquaintance to wanna get to know me better & it became way deeper than a post divorce hookup surprisingly quick! Within a few months, I was like, “This couldn’t possibly be this easy! I’m falling in love with a hot professional woman that I seriously have so much in common with?” I don’t know how I got so lucky. And you’re making your own luck, too. I’m glad you know that she’s gonna be sorry she ever left you. And she’ll never be able to get you back—because you finally know what you deserve too

UnknownUsername113 · 2025-09-19T03:30:07+00:00

I am better. Better looking isn’t the only way to do that. Clearly looks are important to you and that’s fine. You’re welcome to that opinion.

Most of us have realized that there’s more peace in letting go than there is with holding a grudge.

If that’s what motivates you to be better, great! But… don’t call the rest of us “soft” because we don’t see value in it.

My wife cheated. At first I was angry and blamed her for everything. It wasn’t until I really looked at myself that realized I was to blame for part of it as well. Not for her cheating but for letting our marriage get to a point where she thought cheating was an option.

Being a better man has nothing to do with looks.

I suggest you read a book called “the obstacle is the way”. It might help you let go of some of the anger you’re holding on to.

Freeman2be · 2025-09-18T22:04:38+00:00

Brother, I am glad you are motivated...but you have to do it for yourself and no one else. Your getting in shape, making more money, and landing a hot lady are all awesome things...for you. Keep crushing it and best of luck to you.

NewDay0110 · 2025-09-18T20:58:19+00:00

If that works for you, I guess it is what it is. I find it healthier to not be defined by what another person is doing. I write my own script. I don't work out and strive for money because I'm trying to impress someone who wronged me - it's not going to change her mind anyway and I don't care. I do it because I want it for myself.

Paddle_Pedal_Puddle · 2025-09-18T19:01:05+00:00

I knew from Day 1 that my ex’s AP wasn’t half the man I am. I surround myself with the kind of men I aspire to be, and that’s my bar, not some insecure loser chasing validation while he goes nowhere in life. And don’t give a damn if my ex ever figures out that she made a huge mistake.

Use this pain to level up, but don’t do it for revenge or vindication. Your ex’s opinion is now irrelevant. Do it so you can live a badass life of purpose for yourself.

And if you’re just looking for a “hotter bitch” to show off, you’re missing the point. Figure out your purpose and find someone honest and loyal who will support you in that.

rb5775 · 2025-09-18T18:48:19+00:00

Letting it go and motivation supplied by righteous anger are 2 different things. What's going on in your head is none of her business. GREY ROCK.

parkinglot_thnksalot · 2025-09-18T18:34:51+00:00

No Contact, stay fit, stay prosperous.

Vollen595 · 2025-09-18T18:31:15+00:00

My ex doesn’t have an AP. Why? He doesn’t want to date a cheater. Lol. Fuck em both. Karma paid her a visit. Lost her job and no one wants anything to do with her. Bye.

Of course she called whining about her sad state of affairs. Blocked everything. Currently I have no clue where on planet earth she is. As it should be.

Expert-Raccoon6097 · 2025-09-18T17:33:19+00:00

The anger stage will only last 2 years or so. Definitely take advantage of it to build a nice physique. 10% bodyfat, some nice muscle, and you are golden.

After the 2 years you won't give two fucks about being better than the guy she is with. You only care now because you have not let her go, and that is perfectly natural as the dumpee, it is going to take time.

After the two years keep maintaining your physique for yourself, not some woman. Ironically this will be attractive AF to all women. The stage you are in now being desperate and seeking external validation is going to be highly repulsive to all women, especially your ex.

DivorceCoachGio · 2025-09-18T17:27:06+00:00

Why is the other guy the loser when it was HER decision to betray you?

Also, you are giving her an intense amount of power.
You are letting her live rent free in your head.

There's no winning.

'I'll have a hotter b*tch' makes so many alarm bells.

You're hurt.
Hurt people hurt people.

You need to heal brother.

RiseNo3399 · 2025-09-18T16:40:49+00:00

Literally by doing anything because of her, to spite her, or whatever, you are giving her power over you. You aren’t ever going to win anything by anything involving her being the goal. She’s a POS. Divest yourself of that shit.

StatisticianOld8246 · 2025-09-18T16:16:09+00:00

Block her ass bro. That bitch should be irrelevant to you.

Title	Motivation
Author	Numerous_Study_1846
Upvotes	36
Comments	31
Date	September 18, 2025 4:08 PM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1nkch5k/motivation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/motivation.1562277 https://theredarchive.com/post/1562277

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