I’m not a man, so feel free to remove this if this isn’t allowed.

I’ve been divorced twice, and both times I’ve been the breadwinner of my relationships. Neither of my ex-husbands have had jobs that lasted and always made significantly less than I have, and ultimately both divorced were a result of them taking years to find a job.

I have gone through my first divorce relatively reasonably, because my first ex-husband had the dignity to not be an ass and take everything I worked for. My second divorce… hopefully follows the trend of the first.

I’ve recently started dating again and my boyfriend is going through a divorce himself, and I’m realizing men are treated so differently (really rather poorly) in divorces. I am constantly baffled at how much my boyfriend’s soon to be ex-wife can get away with.

These subreddits have been so insightful for my boyfriend and also for me in ensuring that we are protected from ex’s that feel entitled to things the things that they’ve never contributed to and just taken for granted.

I feel so terrible reading all of your stories with all the hurt that I see some of you going through, and I can see literally right through the mind games some of your ex’s put you through.

Just know that you’ll get through this one day, there will be a light to the end of those tunnels. It’s honestly super helpful for me and my boyfriend to be going through divorces together, we’re able to put our heads together and point out the bullshit that our opposite gender soon to be ex’s are putting us through so we can cut through the bullshit and protect ourselves and our futures.

There is support out there and you should feel empowered to speak up. It’s not right that men are expected to pay every ounce of their livelihood towards someone who never cared or reciprocated the care to build themselves up. It’s super unfair that men are expected to maintain a lifestyle that their ex was ungrateful for. Honestly, if there’s any advice I could give and that I am blanket noticing here is that y’all really don’t complain enough. Stop taking the shit, throw the guilt card back and complain.

Ok rant over lol. Just wanted to show some thanks and appreciation from me & my boyfriend. Not a man, but this subreddit helps a lot.