This story just happened and our social circle is still a bit in shock, but it's relevant to this sub's message, and I wanted to share.

A female acquaintance of mine divorced her abusive husband some years ago. They married young, and he really did a huge number on her self esteem and sense of independence. He was very controlling and critical, and became stalker-y during the divorce. She has a restraining order against him to this day.

He had since re-married. We found out over the weekend that the new wife was missing. At first it was assumed she'd fled to a family member or a women's shelter. Then she was found in their home dead, via brutally unnatural causes. I don't know the details, but the guy was arrested and held without bail immediately on charges of murder.

I tell you this not to blame this poor, poor woman for her death, but to remind us all of the critical importance of zero tolerance for certain behaviors - isolating you from friends/family, constantly tearing you down, controlling your actions, behaving possessive and jealous...these are warning signs of an unstable abuser, whose behaviors are likely to escalate to physical violence. This is life and death stuff. Be safe out there, all.