Chronic illness, CPTSD

blackcanves · 2021-03-08T13:50:37+00:00

I was diagnosed with PTSD too. I never considered it a chronic illness but that might actually be a better way of looking at it. There’s always new triggers I’m discovering which is frustrating but also a little surprisingly to see that now I am able to better deal with it.

I 100% agree that you need to learn to have compassion for yourself and honestly therapy helps a lot. If you can def try it out with someone who specializes in CPTSD.

I would also say that you don’t need to do this alone. I was always looking to find a partner that would “fix me” and that does more harm than good. I was looking in the wrong place. First and foremost find comfort within yourself, but don’t shy away from reaching out to friends. It had helped me a lot opening up to them and having a strong network of female friends to support you.

dulciori · 2021-03-08T16:06:11+00:00

I was recently diagnosed and it was such a breakthrough moment. It honestly explained so much of my life that I have been trying to figure out for a long time. Just wanted to share a book that made a huge difference for me: Complex-PTSD From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker. That book and working with my therapist doing EMDR have helped immensely.

It’s completely okay to take some time to yourself to focus on healing. CPTSD has an enormous impact on the relationships we have with others, both romantic and non-romantic so it is a good thing to learn appropriate boundaries and what healthy, positive relationships look like. Otherwise we are doomed to repeat the same traumatic, damaging patterns of the past.

Theboredshrimp · 2021-03-08T14:02:35+00:00

can't get diagnosed with c ptsd hereand I hate self diagnosing but I have most of the traits, I also contracted an autoimmunes disease due to the abuse I've been through, understanding my cptsd and working on my hypervigilance was my first step to unraveling all the emotional trauma, now I struggle with compassion, I'm literally in a 'freeze' episode because i'm judging myself so hard and can't get any work done because i'm afraid of messing up, stupid but I. can't. move.

hapylittlepupppy · 2021-03-08T14:15:54+00:00

I'm a chronic migaines suffer and I've been sick I'm some way most of my life. My mother and maternal grandfather were the only people who believe me. My father who left when I was 4 weeks old did his best to discredit my mother every chance he got, he also forced me into sport, made me go camping, let me get sunburnt, didn't look after me when I was sick or in pain and allowed his girlfriend to "deal with my picky eating" which meant I was terrfied every time I ate near her.

Becuase of this I spent everyday up until a diagnosis at 13 in kind of pain or with a cold or flu (I was so run down I could never fight anything off) It took me 3 more years to find a doctor how would treat my migraines and because I got diagnosed after 12 I didn't qualify for early treatment. That meant I had to wait another 2 years to get Botox for my migaines.

I've had to deal with being called a drug seeker and my female Neuro was screamed by a male GP for given me narcotics. I love my doctors now and yet the thought of going makes me sick, Covid has been a blessing in some ways because to get my regular meds all I have to do is call up. Getting Botox doesn't worry me because my Neuro is a saint but other than that I've got to really prepare myself for anything medical.

I got so anemic my hair was falling out and yet when I finally got a blood test I almost threw up. I have so much medical anxiety and I fit the grounds for medical post trauma but if I am diagnosed with a mental illness they may see it as a reason to withhold the drugs I need to function so best believe I'm dealing with it on my own.

I know I sounds like a drug addict but I only take medication when I need it, that means only when I'm in so much pain I wouldn't be able to sleep and/or can't eat (about 10-15 days a month).

Bubbly-Manufacturer · 2021-03-08T15:55:08+00:00

I developed seb derm (skin thing) after I was being stalked and harassed daily by a man. As well as hair loss. I still deal with it over 4 yrs later. It’s gotten better but I don’t think it’ll go away. Hair gotten better but will lose when stressed which didn’t happen before. Seb derm got better but still have some.

maracat1989 · 2021-03-08T15:59:41+00:00

Yeah girl- fibromyalgia. My father scared us into submission. It’s an invisible illness and nobody (friends, significant others, family) remembers it or takes it into account. It’s really hard.

Fantastic_Ad680 · 2021-03-08T17:11:19+00:00

I know it’s a redundant statement but as someone with complex PTSD I had no idea just how complex it was. It seeps into every facet of my life...I battled a lot of self destructive behaviours and still do, albeit to a lesser extent. Dating can and is very difficult with it. But, a gift is that - buried under the CPTSD - for me, is a self with very good introspection and intuition. I am becoming better aware of my triggers and what is helpful for me. And I agree with what others are saying - community/friendships are so helpful, in addition to nurturing the self. Romantic relationships for me are harmful no matter what at this point, because my attachment style is highly insecure and I’m not in a place to be able to form healthful ones. But I can have very healthy and fulfilling friendships, familial relationships, and peer/patron relationships in community programs. Boundaries help too. It just takes time to find what is “right”. Sending you my best thoughts truly truly. Edit: also yes affects my body too, body aches, migraines, and major digestive issues never had before

r4nd0m-u53r · 2021-03-08T18:36:50+00:00

Yep, I was diagnosed with BPD and then realized I better fit CPTSD it just isn't in the DSM. I went from an abusive home to an abusive relationship. My entire life I've been told I'm too sensitive or too much so I now gaslit myself that I'm over reacting, or that I'm the problem and don't trust my intuition about anyone. Which means I give far too many people unlimited chances. Even after therapy I thought I was doing better... Jumped right into a hot and cold situationship. The good part about it though was I realized even though the dynamic was toxic I needed to learn how to self regulate, self sooth, put the phone down, stop sending emotionally loaded bombs at people, express my feelings in better ways. I stopped dating and I am now working on having more authentic vulnerable relationships with everyone and if you get all weird on me when I try to have healthy expression of feelings ... It's hard for me to want you in my life. I hope maybe in 6 months to a year I can tip toe back out into dating with a much stronger sense of self and boundaries.

Along with Pete walker that was already mentioned. How to be an adult by David richo is amazing and why am I afraid to tell you who I am by John Powell is good and has a great chapter on the games with subconsciously play. I realized I often play the role of victim without meaning to.

Edit: cPTSD can lead to chronic stress, which leads to high levels of cortisol. Cortisol can mess up all sorts of systems in our bodies.

BlackWidow960 · 2021-03-08T18:34:05+00:00

Yep I developed IBS, hyperhydrosis (excessive sweating) and my sleep has never been the same even now that it’s been years later :/ it really sucks

trettles · 2021-03-08T21:37:53+00:00

Yes, chronic fatigue, muscle pain, gut problems, sleep problems (recurring nightmares about a specific traumatic experience every time I've fallen asleep for the past 15 years).

joylesschick · 2021-03-09T02:28:19+00:00

I also believe my trauma caused me to develop a chronic illness. Two if we're counting. Pain has a way of manifesting in a way that begs to be believed when we pretend it doesn't exist.

FrozenExpanse · 2021-03-08T22:02:09+00:00

Crippling anxiety and depression, panic attacks, chronic fatigue, insomnia.

shutup201 · 2021-03-08T22:46:46+00:00

Yep. It's all really a nightmare to think about the damage a narcissist caused me, and I wish I had avoided.

t3ddi · 2021-03-08T22:56:17+00:00

Yes. I have Hashimoto's thyroid disease, eosinophilic esophagitis and angioedema. I also have low complement proteins so I am immunocompromised. Notice how these diseases are all in the throat. Not that I fully believe in it but the throat chakra can be blocked by a lack of agency and voice. Something we tend to lose when abused/codependant. It could alsobe the long term effects of anorexia/bullemia as a result of cptsd. I am currently delving into body work after years of cognitive/mind based therapies in an effort to lessen the ever increasing chance that I get throat cancer of some sort.

2021-03-09T00:18:22+00:00

I have/had ctpsd and have chronic illnesses, I don't know if they are related, or how I would be able to tell.

Daydreamingon · 2021-03-09T00:23:55+00:00

I have CFS/fibro and I’m sure it’s a ptsd thing from witnessing my schizophrenic dad beat my mom as a toddler and the implications of him stalking us throughout our childhood. Interestingly my mom and brother also have autoimmune issues which I’m 100% certain is a trauma related response too..

Sending love to everyone in the comments, you’re all strong beautiful ladies x

Delirious_Duchess · 2021-03-09T02:40:03+00:00

Yes!! I have CFS/ME and Fibromyalgia, and it's a nightmare. I was diagnosed as a pre-teen, a few doctors mentioned that childhood trauma is a common cause. I looked at my parents like 👀, but of course they never acknowledged it. I also battle with very severe OCD and clinical depression, they don't acknowledge that either.

I've had a lot of therapy, I feel like my relationship with my mum is slightly improving, but I still have fantasies of just letting my parents have it and basically saying "you f*cked up my life and my childhood and never acknowledged it, I deserve an apology", but we'll see. On my part I feel like I'm moving forward and recovering, but I so much wish I had a happier and healthier childhood and avoided many of the problems I have now

lucidlotus · 2021-03-08T23:10:54+00:00

I haven’t been diagnosed but strongly suspect I have it. Difficult relationships and/or breakups make it flare up and I end up feeling traumatized, have uncontrollable flashbacks and rumination/anxiety, and I feel like I got hit by a truck. I’m looking into EMDR to start treating it (years of talk therapy did absolutely nothing).

frogchickenhorse · 2021-03-09T00:08:01+00:00

I was diagnosed with ptsd in late 2019, it is mostly from a horrible holiday 15 years ago. Been dealing with depression and anxiety since that time. Have lived with essential tremor for 25 yrs. I think the anxiety stems from ET mostly. I have long periods of happy singledom and when I make an effort to date or have a relationship I find extremely lvm and only put up with it for short periods of time. I want a life partner but can’t seem to have any luck in that area, so I stay single.

yakattacksback · 2021-03-09T02:32:40+00:00

I was diagnosed with CPTSD as a teen. Thankfully, I went to a program that taught CBT and DBT. If you can, find someone who specializes in PTSD. I don't know what the most recent treatments are for it, but I can tell you that the right treatment means the difference between suffering and truly living. It takes time.

You are right that you shouldn't date right now. You need to focus on your mental health. This isn't to "save men from your drama" (I was told that really on by a "friend"). Instead, it's too save you from making decisions you'll regret. I was stupid and didn't listen to my "helpful" friend. While I ended up with kids I love, I suffered more than necessary. Not dating helps you. You need to wait until you feel comfortable making the right decisions for your future. When you are starting this kind of treatment, it's hard to navigate feelings. It's hard to understand that what you want isn't what you need. It's very easy to latch on to something that isn't good for you. Wait. Please wait it out. It'll be worth it in the end.

my_curated_life · 2021-03-09T08:02:04+00:00

Yes 🥺 I developed UTI’s, every day. It went away when I began to confront the underlying anger I felt from being betrayed by those who were supposed to protect me. I have been healing from my c-ptsd for 4 years now and it is not always easy, but with each year, I feel another layer to the trauma lifted.

I do notice, when I am triggered by something that reminds me of my past, I can ruminate and spiral into nonstop thinking about the trauma. And, in that moment, a UTI comes along. So, I journal or sometimes just talk it out to myself about how I am feeling and the anger I feel from being betrayed. As I soothe myself, the UTI symptoms go away.

But on a more practical level! Taking vitamins and probiotics has helped immensely. Trauma can wreak havoc on your immune system! So I have found that healing my body with natural foods and nutrients has helped also.

💗💗💗

RadicalFemale · 2021-03-11T04:02:43+00:00

Yep, the body keeps score.

tauredi · 2021-03-10T08:14:04+00:00

Systemic lupus with Sjögren’s syndrome, and systemic scleroderma.

I will die early because of my early abuse.

Title	Chronic illness, CPTSD
Author	orangeboobert
Upvotes	135
Comments	52
Date	March 8, 2021 1:12 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/m0fe9w/chronic_illness_cptsd/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/chronic-illness-cptsd.1191063 https://theredarchive.com/post/1191063

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