You receive a thoughtful, funny, or maybe even apologetic message from a lvm/nvm/zvm from your past. You may think that he has been thinking about you for months and finally got the courage to OpEN uP about this precious feelings at long last. Maybe he has been working on his commitment, trust, cleanliness and numerous other issues that you would not put up with. Maybe he likes you so much that he's willing to change! Afterall, you yourself wouldn't reach out to someone like that unless you've been thinking about them....
Nah sis, most likely this is not the case. At FDS, we advocate block and delete, but lvm/nvm/zvm do the opposite. They keep a rolodex of every girl they had anything remotely resembling a sexual interaction with. He hasn't been thinking about you for months. He just finished playing vidya and now he's horny, he's scrolling through his rolodex. Most likely he will get rejected, but he continues on through his list. He's shooting his shots. If the answer is no, his situation remains as it was before, so why not try. If she engages, it could turn into an easy lay!!! Afterall, his chances of getting sex are higher with someone who has been attracted to him in the past than a random stranger.
Do not apply any meaning/hope to this sort of reach out at face value. IF you decide to give him ONE more chance, he has to start from the beginning - court you like you would expect from a man you just met. If he was just looking for an easy lay, this will weed him out because it would be just as much (if not more) effort from him to get that from you than a random stranger. Only proceed with extreme caution. Most likely he is just going through his list looking for an easy lay, do not think much of it.
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Please, please, please listen to OP. In my 10+ years of dating experience, every single time a man has come back around it's been because things with his new girl didn't work out or he was just generally lonely and horny. It never works out, they just do the same shit to you again.
You'll want to be flattered, you'll fantasize that he was sitting around pining for you and contemplating the consequences of his actions, but that is almost without exception, wishful thinking.
Don't be the sucker who takes the bait.
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I honestly wouldn't even advocate for the "starting over" approach unless a long time has passed, to the tune of several years, at least. I think with someone you were previously involved with, it's too easy to fall into the trap of picking up where you left off, and already having had certain feelings clouds your judgement. And I think it hurts more the second time because you already kind of knew what you were signing up for.
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