I can’t count how many times my mother, grandmother, aunts, and other female family members didn’t stand up for myself or my other female relatives while they were being abused, gaslit, or manipulated by male family members. They all kept quiet, not even offering emotional support, just to “keep the peace.” Now, the cycle is continuing with the next generation, and the effects of this cyclical abuse are even worse. I am the only one speaking out against all of this now, and I am seen as the “troublemaker” of the family, not the LVM.

Being a HVW means standing up for other women in addition to standing up for yourself, not keeping the peace. If a woman you love is suffering, offer her support. Of course, pickmes may not take up this support right away, but that doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be offered.

“Keeping the peace” only benefits the patriarchy and allows men to continue with their NVM habits.