My LVM exes used to get so upset when I would tell them about high-value people I know. They realized they couldn’t normalize their low-value behavior.
I had an ex who would complain about driving to see me, even though he pretended to live nearby when we met. I told him an anecdote about how my dad would wake up before his job, just to take me to the summer camp I wanted to go to the next town over. It was three extra hours of driving every day, but he said the best part of his day was spending time with his kids. My ex was absolutely furious that I had an example of someone willing to spend his time improving my life without complaint. I’m sure a pickme would have apologized to the LVM or offered to meet halfway.
I had another ex who got me a fake clearance rack necklace for my birthday, from a brand I hated. I had been giving him hints about what I actually wanted (similar price, but more my style), but he just ignored them. He asked me what my mom got me. I told him three bracelets from my favorite brand, my foundation she knew I ran out of, nail polish and other trinkets, and a heartfelt card. His mood soured so quick when he realized the level of thoughtfulness I was accustomed to and that he looked like an ass in comparison.
I had an ex who would cut me down with his words. He was shocked that I broke up with him over his “critiques”. I told him that almost every single day, my siblings and parents let me know that they have full confidence I’ll achieve my goals, and that they use their words to build me up. He was floored and said it wasn’t “real life”.
I had an ex who tried to get me to live with him and stay near him, but in the end I didn’t, because that would have benefited him while delaying my goals. He was conditioned to think that women should go along with his desires. My family told me I didn’t have to be limited by his area, I should move wherever is best for me. My ex was so angry that I didn’t give up my purpose for his.
I had an ex try to dictate how I dress. I told him that no one has ever told me what to wear, and no one ever will. He wasn’t used to women not being easily controlled. LVM try to perpetuate their toxic family dynamics on everyone they meet, and it didn’t work on me.
Don’t let LVM normalize LVM behavior.
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