Double standard experience.

hadmeintiers · 2020-12-23T06:17:59+00:00

[deleted]

daproest1 · 2020-12-23T06:46:43+00:00

Break up with a girl, and she’ll want to have endless debates about it and talk and all that. And it’s fine.

Girl breaks up with you, and if you have as much of a hard time letting go you’re a “creep” or a “stalker”.

Relationship falls apart, and it’s always the guys fault no matter what. She cheated? Your fault. U neglected her. You guys argued? Also your fault, you’re a monster. Her immature emotional tantrums had nothing nat to do with it for she is a saint.

The list goes on forever really.

watermelonicecream · 2020-12-23T07:39:10+00:00

A few years ago while in college I used to wait tables at this family owned seafood restaurant.

Owners were this Greek family, amazing people, but spoke broken English, raised in Greece, not even educated to the high school level.

I’m definitely someone that falls under the “conventionally attractive label”, I’m 6’3” 225lbs and a high level athlete growing up.

I was the only non-Mexican male staff member and there was basically an inside joke among the female staff (ranging in age from 20 to ~45) that r/watermelonicecream is sexy.

One day I’m walking into the kitchen from the floor with an empty tray to check on food for one of my tables. One of the bartenders who’s ~45 and literally a 1/10 (fat, bad teeth, poor facial aesthetics) reaches between my legs as she’s following into the kitchen and tugs on the head of my penis. About 5 staff members (all female) witness and simply giggle.

This happened a couple other times, once she grabbed my ass, another time I was at the soda fountain getting drinks and the person reached under my arms and ran their hands from the top of pectoral major all the way down to my waist.

All three times, multiple witnesses, all female, nothing but giggles.

Could you imagine if a fat, bald, 45 year old man with awful teeth, followed a beautiful 22 year old server into the kitchen and reached between her legs and ran his fingers across her camel toe?

What do you think the reaction would have been?

Dogecoin_trader · 2020-12-23T07:28:25+00:00

Women have effectively a blank cheque from society on being able to abuse their partners.
A woman would have to cause man severe physical harm to get any punishment, and even in that case her punishment will be light.

Feminists actively promote policies and laws that directly make it easier for women to be abusive, and harder for men to get any support or help. Radical feminists straight up dont believe women can even abuse men.

haleykohr · 2020-12-23T12:02:44+00:00

When a guy sleeps with lots of women he's a 'stud'.

When I do it, I'm a 'lesbian'

Laytheblameonluck · 2020-12-23T14:41:05+00:00

Young people working as store clerks in supermarkets.

Teenage girls: get all the attention and validation from customers, and they act like they are used to it.
Teenage boys: treated like they are at the bottom of social hierarchy, and they act like they are used to it.

This is why I make a point of always being super respectful to the young teenage boys working in the supermarket - watch as they get taken by surprise.

Mkg102216 · 2020-12-23T08:33:56+00:00

One of the double standards that really get me is how difficult it is for women to get sterilized versus men. There's not really anything legal that makes it harder for women but a lot of medical providers still make a big fuss about young women and women with no kids wanting to get sterilized. Just a lot of situations in the medical world where female patients aren't taken as seriously as their husbands or male patients. There are lots of instances where doctors consult a patient's husband when there is no legal necessity or encouragement for doing this. You will barely ever see this the other way around.

spacechicken1990 · 2020-12-23T07:06:05+00:00

When I have grievances or get angry I’m hysterical; men are allowed to show anger and not be seen as over emotional.

When I’m assertive I’m a bitch; a man is a leader.

Edited with a few points added:

But due to this male victims aren’t taken seriously. Men are viewed as defacto being the strong ones so their victim hood is not acknowledged.

And most importantly when the hulk smashes things he’s incredible... I’m a slut :(

Mimoxs · 2020-12-23T08:39:57+00:00

Boys' perversion is constantly expected and dismissed. Their sexuality is seen as an annoyance at worst and usually just healthy and meaning he's "a man." Boys are expected to be hypersexual creatures. Boys are expected (and excused) to try and peep at girls and do unethical things to get sexual gratification.

Girls who show a sex drive or sexual interest as a child, masturbate as a child, watch porn etc are seen as having something wrong with them. They are shamed and made to feel wrong for it. If you are hypersexual as a young girl you will be treated as some messed up malfunctioning creature that falls short of being a "correct" female, the assumption is something is "wrong" with you.

In general, even as an adult, our sexuality and perversions are shamed and seen as bizarre or strange if they're not within a set boundary. Women are allowed to like vanilla sex and sometimes rough sex, heavy bdsm is permitted if she's willing to be thought of as having "issues." But if you get weirder than that, you're just, again, thought of as something being wrong with you.

Women who are hypersexual in any way or asexual or both are seen as having a "male brain." Women who tend to think about or refer to sex frequently are written off as attention seekers or sluts at best, rarely as perverts the way men in that position are. And even when women are labeled perverts, it's shamed, not treated as funny the way it is with men.

NotGoingoutofMW · 2020-12-23T13:10:54+00:00

Munich octoberfest. An older lady in dirndl grabed my friend at his dick and said "it looks bigger than it really is". Security said that the atmosphere were so casual and he shouldn't mind but somehow i whitnessed two guys got in serious trouble just because i girl accused them to stalk her and stare at her tits (dirndls showing a nice cleavage).

thedeadpill · 2020-12-23T16:46:22+00:00

woman good man bad

This video says pretty much says it all (though, mind the cheesy/shitty music).

Anyway, when men are being assaulted by women, it's a laughing matter and no cause for intervention, but when women are being assaulted by men the actors and cameraman can barely explain that it's an act before bystanders are ready to fuck up the dude.

It's a microcosm for everything, IMO. woman good man bad.

Mkg102216 · 2020-12-23T08:20:36+00:00

As a woman your experiences really piss me off. That shouldn't be acceptable, you are just as deserving of feeling safe and comfortable as any woman at that bar is.

jakethegreatwhite · 2020-12-23T07:48:06+00:00

What you don't understand is that slutty women bring in simps, which brings in money. That works for pretty much anything that revolves around women making money off their gender like ehem twitch.

AnarchoNAP · 2020-12-23T17:15:17+00:00

The hospital staff kept asking if they could cut off part of my male child’s genitals. If I had a female child this would have been super illegal and I could have requested new nurses.

Brainless-Wonder · 2020-12-23T21:06:51+00:00

In my general experience in the United States (can’t speak for how this is different across cultures), most people either do not give a fuck, react with disbelief, or think it’s funny when a woman abuses a man. Huge double standard there when it comes to physical violence, I’ve seen it happen with both friends and experienced it myself.

I used to have a female friend I was pretty close with who unfortunately was very into drugs (hard stuff). One night she did cocaine before meeting the rest of our friend group. She had developed a pretty irascible temperament along with her habits, and in the middle of a conversation she flipped a switch and started making a scene, demanding that I hit her as she punched me dead in the chest and arm. Not that this makes it any more or less excusable but at about 5’11” she wasn’t exactly a small girl, and she did MMA and judo so she really could do some damage. I’m pretty scrappy but wasn’t about to hit a girl, so she got really pissed I wouldn’t hit her back (drugs, man) and started choking me out. People around us just laughed like it was the funniest thing ever. The bartender didn’t say or do jack shit as I was getting strangled in front of him. One of my friends broke it up and I went outside, but she followed and kept going at it. Shit got really ugly.

One of my guy friends was being abused by his ex at the time. During a house party they threw she attacked him out of nowhere, accusing him of looking at another girl. She then went upstairs, threw herself down the stairs to make it look like he had beat her, and called the cops. Despite several people having seen this and vouching for him, they arrested and charged him anyway. He was put through a humiliating trial wherein he was found not guilty, but the legal fees left him broke. He’s doing better now and has a restraining order against her, but that year fucked him up.

Wish I had less stories about this, but there’s a huge double standard in how people react when women abuse men.

Sid_Insidious · 2020-12-24T13:58:28+00:00

- She gets mad, she can smash all your shit. You get mad and break a flower vase and there's a cop's knee on your neck. When the cops show up, no matter who smashed what, the man is taken away to jail (to give her a few days if she decides she wants to clean out the apartment.) This is the power that VAWA gave to women. If a man phones in because of violent, dangerous, or just crazy woman, the cops laugh at him. Or come to the house and arrest him.

- She can literally ruin a man with #metoo for him committing the crime of being "Creepy". She can also put her hands all over men and nothing comes of it.

- She has created an environment at work where men are afraid to even speak to her. She can ask out men at work without any fear of repercussions.

- She can slut-it-up on Tinder, have different men for different uses, have "Fuck Bois" and guys she might consider dating. When men do the exact same thing she cries foul and says "men are pigs" because specific men won't do exactly what she wants, all of the time.

- She gets a school system designed for her, anti-male colleges, affirmative action hiring, and makes more than her male counterparts. She also gets to complain about wage gap and glass ceilings while being unable to find an "economically attractive husband".

- She can take her husband to court and make up any number of vicious lies about his behaviour as a father and he can lose access to his kids. She can then take the same kids and put them in a life of neglect and squalor and it's difficult or impossible for the same man (or even the state) to do anything about it. (Women get custody for free. Men have to pay 100's of thousands in legal fees just to get kids away from an abusive or drug-addled mother).

I'm going to go back to bed now. I can do this all day. I bet I could do 100 of these.

pleasantldar · 2020-12-25T14:12:46+00:00

Super woke friends nodding along when someone says "men" as a group need to be "corrected" because of how violent they are. Same people being anti-racist and pro-muslim. They'd never accept such a generalization about women, blacks or muslims. You can say things about men that even so-called tolerant, progressive people wouldn't dare to say about other groups.

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slackstarter · 2020-12-23T19:43:15+00:00

You really don't see the difference between a girl getting into a club with a short dress and you not getting in because you're wearing shorts?

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2020-12-24T12:41:25+00:00

What do I care about double standards for. Just live your life.

The_Legend_of_Jaelon · 2020-12-26T08:04:51+00:00

The worst I’ve seen actually happens with guys from girls. I saw this happen a lot in my late teens too. Basically it’s when I (who wasn’t really seen as a ‘high status’ guy at the time) would basically try to crack a joke or something and girls would look at me and just claim what I said was the weirdest thing ever. Then whichever dude every girl was simping over would say something and suddenly they’re falling head over heels with this dude over the real life equivalent of a dry text.

An example would be when I was talking to some girl and after chatting her up a while I made a joke and she just didn’t say shit. So I was like oh well on to the next. Fast forward and I’m watching her live on some social media app and she invites this dude. She called this dude and complimented his blue eyes and I kid you not, he replied with “Hehe yeah my Viking ancestors had good taste with the women they raped” and she sat up and laughed at that shit like it was funny. That’s when I knew “personality” and “being funny” were pretty arbitrary unless you met the threshold for looks first.

I saw it happen a lot more with my other friend. Genuinely funny dude who was around 5 ft for most of our teens. Every time he was brought up girls would go “Omg he’s soooo funny but you know he’s short and he’s kinda ugly.” Like it was almost like they couldn’t admit he was funny without saying he was unattractive.

Suck-Less · 2020-12-26T10:38:12+00:00

If there’s one double standard that pisses me off it’s this: if you are male, and especially white, there’s a presumption of success. Like if you are not extremely successful, it’s your fault and you failed. If you are female, there’s a presumption of needing help. If you failed it’s not her fault, society kept her down.

Because of this a vast majority of social programs go to promoting and helping girls achieve while boys are ignored or discriminated against.

The truth is that only a fraction of human beings are hardwired to succeed and a majority of that small percentage is male. For that small percentage, you can’t keep them down, for the rest you have to “give” them opportunities or they won’t accomplish shit.

SeemedGood · 2020-12-23T07:11:27+00:00

The idea of a “double standard” implies that the things being measured by the standard are the same.

Men and women are not the same.

Title	Double standard experience.
Author	Sufficient-Ad-3586
Upvotes	25
Comments	149
Date	December 23, 2020 5:46 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/kinan6/double_standard_experience/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/double-standard-experience.746730 https://theredarchive.com/post/746730

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