Guy won't commit to his plate, she gets upset and accuses him of being a misogynist. Guess who r/relationship sides with.

FrogTrainer · 2015-07-02T15:27:23+00:00

Funny thing is, if it was the other way around, a male FWB developed feelings for the women op, they'd give some shit about how he broke the unwritten contract of no strings attached.

putsch80 · 2015-07-02T16:30:02+00:00

"I degraded myself to an alpha, and this girl is doing the same, and I can relate to her feeling bad, and that makes you at fault!" Women's logic 101.

This isn't just the logic of the commenters. I'd guarantee you her mom was a CC rider, got alpha widowed (probably several times), and had to settle marrying some poor schlub because she rode the carousel right into the wall. The mom's phone call, while irrational, is somewhat understandable. She's just trying to prevent her daughter from making the same mistakes she made herself.

The problem is that, like many of these washed up CC riders, the mom believes that her misery is the fault of the men she fucked rather than her own fault. Thus, instead of talking to her daughter about self respect, choosing men more carefully, and avoiding carousel rides -- simple things that the daughter could and should take control over -- the mom instead lashes out at the alpha. "It's all his fault that my daughter is about to be alpha widowed."

It's all just a sign that mommy never took any responsibility for her own mistakes, blaming the men she fucked and removing all sense of self responsibility. And now she's helping her daughter do the same. And so the cycle will continue.

Denswend · 2015-07-02T16:21:30+00:00

Funny thing is, had this guy come to TRP, we would tell him what is healthy for him. No, committing to an easy woman is never a good idea. Sex dries up, you are stuck in a relationship where you cannot fulfill your basic needs, and she considers you less than a man - but they will never articulate it because they need their moral superiority. Currently, committing to a 11/10 traditional RPW is not a good idea either - because divorce rape and such. So we would shield him from an abusive relationship, and protect him from a world of financial hurt.

But the great irony is, had he come here, he would probably not require that advice.

Now on to the comments :

Because remember what the first word in "FWB" is - "friend". If you have a friend who expresses romantic feelings for you that you do not reciprocate, 9/10 times the kind thing to do is back off, at least for a little while.

Which is why we must shy away from any newspeak. FWB included. A plate is, while somewhat funny, an apt term for that. You might be led to believe that fucking = emotional commitment which is wrong. It's even logically wrong because if fucking=commitment then commitment=fucking - and just try to go with that line on women dominated places.

Speaking of which...

Guys aren't vending machines you put sex into and get relationships out of.

This is downvoted to hell, and a man is told to be "insufferable", "how did Claire fall for you", etc. This is a comment from OP, and he is either a troll or a genuine half pilled person. It's downvoted with no logical explanation given - other than shaming, of course.

You're the worst. Enjoy being technically correct and having this blow up in your face. I'll never get how people can come on here looking for advice and then ignore all of it.

To a woman, and effeminate men, their emotional state is their reality. They might occasionally admit that there is a discrepancy between actual reality and their emotional state, but still,muh feelz.

Notice that only OP is being downvoted, but when other people say what he says, they're not. "Claire is her own person" is -23 when OP says it, and +25 when someone else says it.

That is because OP made them angry. You simply cannot take things like "women are their own people", "we believe in equality" out of context and apply them somewhere else. Context is always something that benefits woman - "women are their own people so you shouldn't get to dictate what they should do with their bodies, but you totally should pay for their abortions and bastards". You cannot consider a woman's statement (when relating to political or emotional) in a vacuum - something to stand on its own merit and to be applied universally - and expect agreement. They don't use ideas for the sake of ideas, they use ideas for the sake of themselves. "Women are their own people so it's cool if she wants to be FWB with me" does not fly.

Oh and classic :

There's a lot of anti-sex stuff in the culture in general. A lot of people think sex is only OK if you're in love, especially for women. These people act like women don't actually like sex, they just trade sex for affection and love and stability. By this logic, any woman having sex outside of a committed romantic relationship is being cheated and is "losing" something. Or that she must have very low self esteem if she's undervaluing her sex so much to be willing to trade it for less than an exclusive romantic relationship.

The commenter I quoted has a good grasp on logic, even though he doesn't have the necessary axioms for proper understanding. Half of the thread is saying "she's using sex to get commitment" and now he is saying "women don't use sex to get commitment".

Hell, this thread amazing in mental gymnastics.

If this depresses you, just remember - you have your agency, much like every other person, whether you like it or not, regardless of what r/relationships, or someone else retarded as them, thinks. If you were in OP's position, you'd know what is bullshit and what is not.

LionLaw · 2015-07-02T16:25:06+00:00

Guys aren't vending machines you put sex into and get relationships out of.

The best bit of information on that post, written by the OP himself.
Isn't it funny how when things aren't working out, it's the mans fault?
Never mind that she is a fully functioning adult capable of making her own decisions, there's a guy involved so let's make her the victim as usual.

BattleDrillOneAlpha · 2015-07-02T16:40:23+00:00

That doesn't mean she was being honest with you. She may have been hoping by continuing as FWB you'd eventually develop feelings as well, but didn't want to pressure you because she likes you and wants to be close you somehow. She also deserves to know that her mother is messing around in her business secretly.

Fuck these comments. OP clearly stated he wanted his dick wet

Here's a comment OP made and guess what.....-44 votes, surprise??

Like I said in the OP, she did say she wanted a romantic relationship and we stopped for a while. But then she wanted to continue as before. I'm not really sure about telling her about the phonecall though, seems like it will just escalate the drama...

And the best comment of the day

If you look at some responses it seems like a lot of girls here are re-living their past mistakes through OP and taking it out on him

Rathadin · 2015-07-02T17:12:41+00:00

Of all the replies, this is the most telling sentence...

You might not realize it, but you're leading her on in her mind.

IN. HER. MIND.

Not to a bunch of reasonable third parties... not in reality when you can objectively think about things... but in her mind.

Today's women really are fucking ridiculous.

MajorMid · 2015-07-02T17:55:23+00:00

Oh man I died at OP's comment in that thread. "Guys arent vending machines you put sex into and get a relationship out of" in response to someone claiming that he was in the wrong because the girl kept wanting to have sex with him in hopes that a relationship would develop.

Of course the comment is -77 and caused a ton of butthurt from betas and women. But man is that the perfect fucking analogy to the "Women arent vending machines that you put niceness into and get sex out of". But of course when that one is said all the time to upset men with unreciprocated feelings towards a woman they are friends with that is A OK!

Women are the gatekeepers to sex and men are the gatekeepers to commitment has never rung so true.

RPthrowaway123 · 2015-07-02T16:04:52+00:00

Classic. She's a strong, independent women right?! I don't see how it's anyone's business here. This guy is a moron for asking in that sub. Someone should PM him and let him know it's okay to keep fucking the chick, because really the advice he's getting in there is ridiculously bad. She obviously is willing to stay with him and continue being used...but these days it's only okay when men orbit women, not the other way around. If it was a guy concerned about how a girl was leading him on for money, rides, and to use as an emotional tampon I would bet all the money in my savings account that those idiots would say he's being selfish and that he's not entitled to sex.

Guess what bitch/bitch's mom, you're not entitled to a relationship either.

bsutansalt · 2015-07-02T16:59:41+00:00

My advice for him is not to sweat it. My advice to her would be, men are not vending machines that you put sex coins in until commitment falls out.

thefisherman1961 · 2015-07-02T17:29:01+00:00

Uhhh, no. Don't hide behind semantics. You KNOW that she has feelings for you. And you CONTINUED to use her as a bed-warmer. KNOWING how she felt. Of course she wanted you back. Because she caught a bad case of feelings. IF you are a good man, you will end it. Because you don't want to lead her on. Which is EXACTLY what you are doing.

Saying that he's "using" her makes her sound like an object that is incapable of making her own decisions. Isn't that the opposite of what feminism says? According to feminist logic, she's not a strong, independent womyn if she is "allowing" herself to be used.

You should have stopped sleeping with her when she said she had feelings for you. If you really didn't know that wasn't a good idea, I guess that's an excuse. But now you know that it's a bad idea from all these other people telling you what's up. If you keep doing it, you value sex over her feelings. And that makes you a butthole.

It takes two to tango. If she doesn't want to be "used" by a guy who doesn't have feelings for her, then she'd stop fucking him. It's obvious that she can't resist the D, because he is an alpha to her. They are trying to beta-fy this guy so hard and it makes me sick.

FortunateBum · 2015-07-02T19:43:51+00:00

For all the young, inexperienced guys out there:

There's no such thing as free pussy.

I know, you probably heard that before. Maybe you don't quite understand what it means.

For women, all sex is transactional. That is, they aren't having sex just to have sex like men do. They are having sex expecting to get something in return. You need no further proof than to look at the starkly different ways gay men and gay women behave.

All FWB situations have one partner wanting something more and one partner not. Almost always, it's the woman who wants more.

Did I think the world was different when I was young? Yes. Did I think there had to be women, maybe lots of women who liked casual sex? Yes. I believed all the feminist blue pill BS about gender. I expected to find women who were down. There practically weren't any.

Truth is, best way to get casual sex out of a woman is when she's in a relationship and away from home (and the relationship) for some reason. In this rare circumstance, a woman will look for a casual encounter with someone they will never see or hear from again. Most women won't even do this because for them, pure sex doesn't interest them.

If you are fucking a woman in your social circle, she wants something 99% of the time. The only exception would be if she's cheating and doesn't make it a habit.

This is why women feel "used" even though they're "getting" sex. In their POV, they're not getting shit. They're giving out sex and not getting an appropriate return.

It's all of course due to biology which cannot be changed so don't bother trying. When women are young, they are much more likely to want to experiment and try new things. Once they've tried it, they'll figure out right away they don't like it. Miranda doesn't exist.

To answer the questions, is she satisfied? Does she want more?

99% of the time, the answer is always yes. Women are the Machiavellian, capitalist, manipulative, greedy psychopaths of gender. If you get pussy, you'll eventually have to pay for it somehow, somewhere. The less you end up paying, the happier you'll be.

Anyway, good luck out there guys.

YouDislikeMyOpinion · 2015-07-02T18:35:24+00:00

This one is too good to be true. We know that the posters over there have huge biases. Now we get to see them play out.

Claire asked me to be in an exclusive relationship, but I explained why we couldn't and she seemed fine with it. I told her we could just stop if she wanted to but she wanted to continue.

She tried to escalate their FWB relationship into an LTR. He used his freedom and sexual preference to deny the escalation. Furthermore, he gave the option of stopping the FWB relationship and the girl herself chose to continue it from her own free will.

Once I read that and saw that there are no holes in the OPs story, I knew that the thread was going to perfectly display that subreddits biases. So I'm going to just have a little fun with some of the responses.

Top Comment:

HOWEVER. For you to go along and act as though you do not have a responsibility towards her feelings is... naive at best, dickish at worst. I should note here that this has nothing to do with the fact that's she's female and you are male - I have seen this same situation play out in both directions.

Let's assume that he does have a responsibility towards her feelings. Roll the cameras back. Not only did he explain why he couldn't, he also offered to stop the whole thing. She came back and said "let's continue". What is this top comment implying that the should do. Funny how there is criticism and no solution. Also, see if there's anything in the OPs post where the OP acts as though he does not have a responsibility towards her feelings. Seriously, do it, the OP is 4 paragraphs and I read it twice just to find something.

Because remember what the first word in "FWB" is - "friend". If you have a friend who expresses romantic feelings for you that you do not reciprocate, 9/10 times the kind thing to do is back off, at least for a little while. One does not simply turn off romantic feelings. And yeah, you could say "well if my friend has feelings for me that I don't reciprocate that's THEIR problem". But is that really how you feel about your friends? That their feelings, involving you, are completely out of your control?

First of all, he did back off. She came back into it.

OP: "We can cease our FWB relationship, if that would benefit you"

Her: "Let's continue"

OP: "I treat you as an adult that can make her own decisions and I respect them. You say that you want to continue. Great."

What this top comment wants you to say is "Hey, you're an adult that wants to continue being FWB, but I'm going to give you a time out until you can figure out your feelings".

So which do you want feminists? Adult treatment or child treatment? You want to be an adult, but when it comes time to pull up your pants you want to be treated like a child.

And yeah, you could say "well if my friend has feelings for me that I don't reciprocate that's THEIR problem". But is that really how you feel about your friends?

What's the solution then? This fucker keeps criticizing and offers no solution.

That their feelings, involving you, are completely out of your control?

I don't even want to get into this one.

you need to really, REALLY make sure that she isn't harboring feelings still

Obviously she's going to still want him to herself. Second of all, why does he need to make sure of that? Timeout. Say I'm beta boy 9000. I'm fucking blondie cakes and I want get official with her. She doesn't want to be in a relationship but offers to keep fucking. But then she finds out I'm still harboring feelings and cuts everything off completely even though the sex was great and both of us wanted it. OR she treats me as an adult, let's me decide what my limits are and gives me the choice of whether or not to keep fucking her. Hey, I didn't get a relationship, but I can still fuck my blondie!

Second top comment:

You CAN take a moment to figure out how that phone call came to be. What is the most likely explanation, given the evidence you've provided?

Yeah, enter detective mode because you have all the time in the world to spend on this kind of shit. Or just call the girl up and ask.

Third top comment:

Yes you should stop sleeping with Claire

Yeah, that will fix it all. No, don't let her choose. Choose for her. Because you know what's in her best interest.

being in this FWB arrangement is hurting her

She's totally not hurting herself (if it's the case that something is hurting her). It's the FWB that's hurting her. She can't be in control of anything, she's first and foremost a victim.

This reminds me of "Oh, I'm getting bullied on some forum I'm going on". Bitch, log off that one forum, problem solved. FWB is hurting you? Leave. Problem solved.

Next comment:

And this is where FWB should have ended.

OP responds with

Like I said, I told her I couldn't do that and we stopped for several weeks, and then she came back and said she wanted things to be like they were so we did that.

Wow, she even had a couple of weeks.

The next response in the comment chain:

You might not realize it, but you're leading her on in her mind.

What the fuck are you supposed to do? Live your life like you're walking on egg shells to not lead other people on? Let's take another approach to that comment. Leading someone on = bad according to the poster. So girls leading guys on = bad too right. I think that's a can of worms that poster doesn't want to open.

I'm going to stop the comment analysis here. To sum everything up, all the comments want OP to make the decision that will lead to an outcome in her favor.

popthatpill · 2015-07-02T15:59:26+00:00

This is precisely the sort of situation for which affirmative consent laws were conceived.

Remember, the point of affirmative consent laws is to give women legal leverage against being platezoned: "commit to me or I go to the cops and say you raped me".

infiniteslinky · 2015-07-02T17:56:50+00:00

Someone should reverse the sexes and fabricate a similar story. Let's turn the hive mind on it's feminist head for science. Then Post results to TRP.

blacwidonsfw · 2015-07-02T19:18:22+00:00

My favorite part.

OP -30 points 2 days ago

Like I said, I told her I couldn't do that and we stopped for several weeks, and then she came back and said she wanted things to be like they were so we did that.

Comentor -33 points 2 days ago*

20 year olds are dumb - 20 year old me would totally have thought you would come around eventually - it's what every movie and tv show tells me.

Is it really so hard to imagine that's whats going through her head?

OP -33 points 2 days ago

is it really so ignorant of me to believe girls can be in charge of their own lives and don't need their decisions made for them?

skoobled · 2015-07-02T22:33:51+00:00

Men get angry about the friendzone because they hate making an investment and not seeing any return.

Women get angry about not being able to fuck their way into a relationship because they hate making an investment and not seeing any return.

faded_jester · 2015-07-02T18:08:55+00:00

In my earliest days of Reddit (before I had even heard of RP) I recall I only gave a single bit of advice one time in that sub. It was something along the lines of "Don't come here for actual advice...especially if you aren't a woman". Yeah that went over pretty well....I quickly took it off my feed and never had to look at that nonsense again....I do sorta feel bad for any men who take their advice....it's like a slow cow taking advice from hungry lions.

Whisper · 2015-07-02T18:17:31+00:00

Women are not vending machines where you insert kindness coins until sex falls out.

Men are not slot machines where you pull the sex lever until you win the commitment jackpot.

markfeel · 2015-07-02T18:54:11+00:00

Reverse translation of the "Uhhh, no. Don't hide behind..." line:

Uhhh, no. Don't hide behind semantics. You KNOW that he has feelings for you. And you CONTINUED to use him as a validation tool. KNOWING how he felt. Of course he wanted you back. Because he caught a bad case of feelings. IF you are a good woman, you will end it. Because you don't want to lead him on. Which is EXACTLY what you are doing.

They'd agree that if a guy is giving a girl attention/validation/money, he shouldn't expect sex. But apparently they think if a girl is giving a guy sex, she SHOULD expect commitment.

Wilhelm_Stark · 2015-07-02T16:41:39+00:00

I don't mean to defend anyone here, but your throwing the concept of a plate at r/relationships. These two ideas do not go well together. What did you expect them to say?

cover20 · 2015-07-02T17:12:17+00:00

Women value their feelings over the guy's feelings. Especially once the guy's committed. That's OK, right?

Man values his feelings over the woman's feelings. Especially before giving commitment. Then that's OK too.

johnchapel · 2015-07-02T19:25:49+00:00

Wow, what a bunch of pussies in that thread.

MHOOD01 · 2015-07-02T19:41:11+00:00

"Bed warmer"

That's what these people call a fuck buddy? Haha, that's cute.

Riddick_ · 2015-07-02T19:59:42+00:00

Last Hamster goes for 100m sprint world record, this gem: You should have stopped sleeping with her when she said she had feelings for you. ... If you keep doing it, you value sex over her feelings. And that makes you a butthole. FKIN LOL. I wonder if this one is over 200lbs yet.

Grasshopper21 · 2015-07-02T17:29:22+00:00

I started to well up with respect at "something something vending machines" and how butt hurt everyone gets after that. This is fucking hilarious.

London-Bananas · 2015-07-02T19:06:38+00:00

Does /relationships always lock posts as soon as they get linked from TRP?

Jokoran · 2015-07-02T22:08:39+00:00

This guy is a fucking hero. I'm reading these replies:

You sound insufferable.

You're the worst. Enjoy being technically correct and having this blow up in your face. I'll never get how people can come on here looking for advice and then ignore all of it.

You are not Claire's friend.

Why on earth Claire has ever had feelings for you is beyond me.

Uhhh, no. Don't hide behind semantics. You KNOW that she has feelings for you. And you CONTINUED to use her as a bed-warmer. KNOWING how she felt. Of course she wanted you back. Because she caught a bad case of feelings. IF you are a good man, you will end it. Because you don't want to lead her on. Which is EXACTLY what you are doing

You're a fucking moron, if you're not going to accept advice then fuck off. You're using her now, she is only with you in the hopes that it eventually turns into a relationship, and it's clearly messing with her.

She's not a piece of meat. And you are not a good guy,.

No...she stated what she wanted but was too weak to quit....so this is on you you for just looking after your own needs.

I can just see this guy's face right now: http://i.imgur.com/RlEAvc8.jpg

changshuaidiao · 2015-07-03T00:37:18+00:00

Men are not vending machines that that you put sex tokens into and a relationship falls out.

[deleted] · 2015-07-03T06:17:24+00:00

This is fucking hilarious, if the guy is being honest he is 100% morally good in my book. Since she is a real person with real agency, it's up to HER to decide whether to keep fucking him or not. Her trying to change him is just a hilarious overreaching on her part, she's trying to control things she can't control but she needs to worry about herself.

For every problem, the solution lies inside. If this woman had agency she would simply... change her behavior and not have a problem.

I love being a man because we actually have the privilege of solving problems. Women don't want to solve problems, they just want to talk. Women prefer status-jousting to anything else on this earth. However, I am a man and I prefer solving problems because status-jousting is boring as FUCK.

Nebulose11 · 2015-07-02T20:07:10+00:00

He doesn't have any responsibility to her. Why do people think that men have responsibilities to women they haven't married?

[deleted] · 2015-07-02T16:24:53+00:00

The problem isn't the actions, nor is it the consequences. The problem with these people is their narcissism, wherein they project their feelings outwards, and in so doing, believe that feelings actually have depth and, more importantly, that feelings have meaning, and that feelings are, therefore, valuable and meaningful. The truth is that feelings are inconsequential, and for all that the majority of people may blindly follow their feelings (to their downfall), they will always be susceptible to those who realise that, actually, feelings have no meaning, and they have no attachments. Hurting somebody's feelings is not a sin, rather, it is something we all do at some point in our lives by virtue of our existing. Modern society is built upon the misinformed premise that hurting somebody's feelings is a bad thing. We need to raise our children to know that anything worth doing shall always upset somebody. Serving one's own interests shall always jeopardise somebody else's. It's not sin to upset somebody. And, the truth to take away from this is that women's feelings are of no fucking consequence. Those of you who care about women's feelings, you need to liberate yourself from whatever it was that made you this way.

Nihilist401 · 2015-07-02T17:34:56+00:00

Another case of female hypocrisy. If this was man who had spent his time and resources on her in order to "win" her commitment / sex when she clearly didnt want that; things would be completely different. you wont see anyone saying that "she KNEW he had feelings for her, yet CONTINUED to use him a wallet, KNOWING how he felt etc etc". Hamster would conclude that the guy did all this because they were "good friends". Ofcourse she never said that she saw him that way...

through_a_ways · 2015-07-02T20:25:31+00:00

There's a comment graveyard at the bottom, I wish the archive had it. Those usually have some of the most telling information.

[deleted] · 2015-07-02T20:40:23+00:00

Laconically, feminism is the idea that men owe women something.

[deleted] · 2015-07-02T20:49:48+00:00

What do you expect when you ask help from a bunch of self entitled cunts and beta weenies who'd kill just be around a chick for two minutes?

London-Bananas · 2015-07-02T21:04:02+00:00

The best thing of this thread was, aside from OP awakening the rage of a thousand shattered plates, that nobody assumed the FWB was actually benefiting the girl as well. They all assume that if BB isn't on the table, this whole arrangement is bad for her. OP said somewhere he wasn't harming her because there were no videos/pics of her and he told no one. So perfect casual sex arrangement for this girl.

Ibex3D · 2015-07-02T21:55:15+00:00

I'll go so far as to say it would be the moral thing to stop sleeping with her for the sake of her feelings. In an ideal world we would all look out for eachother and try to foster eachother's happiness. Now, does the fact that he is still fucking her make him a bad person? No. She is completely free to stop fucking him but she isn't gonna do that. Why is the man the one who has to control his urges for the sake of the girl's feelings when the girl wont even do what is best for her feelings? I will agree it is the moral thing to do to end it but this dude isn't fucking Jesus. It's not his responsibility to police other people's decisions. And let's be honest, if you were 100% moral 100% of the time you would never get laid and compared to things like fucking a girl in a relationship, cheating, and rape, this is far from the most sexually immoral thing a man could do.

mercuryg · 2015-07-03T00:28:09+00:00

is it really so ignorant of me to believe girls can be in charge of their own lives and don't need their decisions made for them?

This is OP's comment and it's downvoted to -33. The entire comment thread is a fantastic shit show, it's so hilariously biased towards women it's simply amazing...i'm in awe

[deleted] · 2015-07-02T23:01:50+00:00

One of my plates is trying to pull some end-run commitment bullshit game atm. Now I know why. She's a redditor and probably saw that shit-show of a thread and got some ideas in her idea. I gave her the "Bye, Felicia" and now she's backpedaling like a motherfucker. Fuckin' females.

scarletspider3 · 2015-07-03T04:24:28+00:00

They just hate it when the man has the power. They think that we just live to serve them. So when some guy doesn't play along he's an asshole.

BetterRedThanRed · 2015-07-03T13:35:47+00:00

Men DO get slut shamed.

TRP sometimes denies this because there are different mechanisms behind male and female slut shaming. But in the end, society is more accepting if a woman openly states that she fucks men just for fun without committing.

"You go girl!" vs "You are an asshole!"

Kolbykilla · 2015-07-02T18:15:56+00:00

This is infuriating! Men and women should both be held accountable for there actions, OP isn't a fucking mind reader if she came back to him after he rejected her plea for a relationship she knows what the fuck she is doing, op has no obligation to give this women a relationship. Everyone in that thread is basically saying the girl shouldn't be held accountable for her actions she doesn't know what she is doing or thinking. No fuck that, if it was a guy they wouldn't be saying the same thing.

trp_ocd · Thu Jul 2 17:35:49 2015 UTC

A good litmus test would be to set up a throw away or two and make similar stories, reverse gender, and gender nuetral (no pronouns). Let the m define the situation... "if you are a girl..." or "you must be the guy because..."

A double blind role reversal will give you all the ammo one would need in the defense of trp shutdown threat.

TheRealMouseRat · 2015-07-02T19:10:02+00:00

Because remember what the first word in "FWB" is - "friend". If you have a friend who expresses romantic feelings for you that you do not reciprocate, 9/10 times the kind thing to do is back off, at least for a little while. One does not simply turn off romantic feelings. And yeah, you could say "well if my friend has feelings for me that I don't reciprocate that's THEIR problem". But is that really how you feel about your friends? That their feelings, involving you, are completely out of your control?

Could one say this to a girl who has friendzoned a guy? It's basically the same thing.

MisterMojoMan · 2015-07-02T20:53:12+00:00

This is a great example of how people view the idea of entitlement between the sexes. So let me get this straight: A man in a long term relationship is fucked up because he feels that when he does his share in the relationship by giving a woman his commitment and emotional support, he should get sex in return (in other words he feels he is entitled to sex) and when a girl denies him of that "privilege", she is completely in the right because it is "her body, her choice".

But when the script is flipped and a woman gives a man sex in the hopes of getting commitment in return, and he denies her of commitment, HE is the one who is wrong. "My body, my choice" right? "You aren't entitled to my body" right? Why should he be obligated to give a woman his commitment even if she gave him sex? We have already established that no one is entitled to anyone else's body, so what makes this any different?

[deleted] · 2015-07-02T21:17:26+00:00

"White Knight Commission of reddit" hahaha it's the little things.

Upvote_To_The_Left · 2015-07-03T01:28:45+00:00

This honestly reads as if someone from here went to the relationship sub and wrote a fake bait post to rattle that subs cages and have them react so we can point and laugh.

Anyone else agree?

[deleted] · 2015-07-03T08:23:41+00:00

Then a dumbass said: You are hurting her by continuing the relationship! You should infer what the phone call meant!

Him: So I should read fucking minds now?

Another dumbfuck: You know she wants full girlfriend status! How dare you not upgrade her!

Him: Men aren't machines you can put sex into and get commitment out of.

SamTheDude16 · 2015-07-03T03:20:39+00:00

"Something something vending machines." "What?" "Guys aren't vending machines that you can throw sex into, and get a relationship out of." That's the best line I've heard all day.

darkwolfx24678 · 2015-07-02T23:08:46+00:00

The comments on that post are completely ridiculous. Clearly, she's a person that can make up her own mind and decisions and that should not weigh on OP's mind. That being said, OP could have a conversation with her again to see if she's actually comfortable with the situation. If she says yes, then their benefits should trek on in full force. He should really push the fact that the "relationship" is that of FWB, preferably through text. You never know when things can go awry and all of a sudden he's in a shitstorm he rather not be in. If she says no, asks for an exclusive relationship again, or even hesitates in her answer then find another plate. No alpha should be so weak that they have to rely on one plate when the plate is not fully invested.

Rougepellet · 2015-07-03T07:59:51+00:00

I love the shit zoo known as the internet. Bitches (not gender exclusive) bitch about how OP lives his life, OP ignores then and carries on fucking dumb sluts who have "feelings" (read severe fucking tingles) for him.

supersonic-turtle · 2015-07-03T17:11:36+00:00

this gives me shivers... the double standard is ridiculous and people who perpetuate the notion that women are tender creatures without a thought or ambition of their own are not only incorrect but they are toxic....

just_for_fun1842 · 2015-07-04T20:03:44+00:00

Uhm not all women are like that. I can say off the bat there was an agreement and she changed the rules. Her fault not his. If she chose to continue still her fault. She's a big girl she should deal.

cashmoney_x · 2015-07-04T23:37:49+00:00

Once again, a man and a woman want different things and somehow the man is the asshole.

[deleted] · 2015-07-06T21:16:53+00:00

She's a big girl. She should be expected to look out for her own emotional wellbeing like a goddamned adult. To indicate otherwise is real sexism.

[deleted] · 2015-07-02T23:29:03+00:00

[permanently deleted]

[deleted] · 2015-07-03T23:54:11+00:00

The more I read the responses about leading her on and her feelings...I can't help but think "who gives a fuck?" I literally laughed out loud at the first reply you put. I can't believe it's come to that...a year ago I would have said "damn, I should make her feel loved and appreciated."

Women have no fucking feelings about sex. If the OP of that thread took any of the advice he got, the chick would split in a second.

matayo41 · 2015-07-02T18:55:32+00:00

I looked through the thread and for the most parts, the highly upvoted comments seem pretty reasonable.

Are you sure you aren't just looking for a reason to be offended?

Constantine_John · 2015-07-02T17:38:06+00:00

I don't know how far down you had to go to find the last couple quotes, but the top 3-5 comments have been, essentially, "You haven't done anything wrong, but you should talk to her and make sure there is no issue." Is making sure your friend/fuckbuddy is alright somehow outside the bounds of responsibility towards your friends? Think about it this way - if it were two dudes, hanging out, drinking, w/e, and you get a similar call - "You're hurting your friend and you need to stop" - would you not bring it up to your friend?

TheColdDark · 2015-07-03T06:17:10+00:00

tldr; "Look at the silly feminists!"

Get this shit off the front page.

[deleted] · 2015-07-02T15:42:39+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Lt_Muffintoes · 2015-07-02T18:18:36+00:00

The thing is, they are kind of right. He does have a relationship with her, and being inconsiderate of her needs makes him a user.

Obviously, she is just as culpable for maintaining the relationship and obviously has some psychological problems, but to say that he is totally in the clear is patently false.

Both of them are terrible people and I would not keep either in my close circle.

Title	Guy won't commit to his plate, she gets upset and accuses him of being a misogynist. Guess who r/relationship sides with.
Author	needsomehelp3211
Upvotes	519
Comments	197
Date	July 2, 2015 3:18 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3bvpns/guy_wont_commit_to_his_plate_she_gets_upset_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/guy-wont-commit-to-his-plate-she-gets-upset-and.34290 https://theredarchive.com/post/34290

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