Does anyone else think they wasted their 20s?

Terdmuffin · 2018-06-27T16:35:43+00:00

You can't do anything about the past so stop whining about it. All you can do is move forward and make your 30s awesome.

creating_my_life · 2018-06-27T17:28:50+00:00

Try being in your mid 50s, and feel like it was only yesterday when you were 22.

DON'T LIVE A MINUTE FOR ANYONE ELSE BUT YOU. DON'T WASTE A SINGLE DAMN DAY CHASING ANYONE'S GOALS BUT YOU OWN.

Nobody gives a shit about you. Live for you.

TheIcePill · 2018-06-27T16:48:44+00:00

You are in the perfect age to fuck 20+ years old women. What's your problem? Also, do what the fuck you want and don't get pussied around by your mother..jeez.

360_no_scope_upvote · 2018-06-27T16:38:00+00:00

You feel it's wasted because your self perceived value is low. Stand up to your mom, don't be a beta pussy and tell her you're not interested in getting married. Get in shape, and do something with your life.

Anyways, you're drying up the pussy around here with your self loathing.

Locoboy713 · 2018-06-27T16:50:32+00:00

35 yr old here, I can somewhat relate. . ooking back to 20s, life in general during that time frame was confusing, challenging and unstable. Shit, I gone through the motion and only fulfill what my family, society and what I thought was important: college degree, corporate job, work my way up to 6 figure salary, buy a house, drive a nice car, dated "nice girls" and hopefully find "the one" (smh) and start a family one day. I don't regret any of that, because that put me on a good path in general and set me up financially where I am today. Don't get it wrong. I did enjoy my 20s with all the fun, irresponsible, dumb shit with friends. But undeniably BP in my all relationships, onetitis, orbiter, you name it. Went full monk mode for 3 months, started lifting, be more self-aware, and discovered RP turning 30. Life is a bitch, but we make the best out of it. Learn how to control your emotion (be stoic), prioritize your need, making gains socially, financially, intellectually & physically. Everything else is just byproduct including women.

btrpb · 2018-06-27T17:24:02+00:00

Don't worry dude. I'm 40. If you look after yourself then you have the gift of manhood; aging and maturing like wine. If you spent a lot of time studying then hopefully you have a good career by now. That's your backbone. Now get down the gym, and start getting new hobbies and start living the life. You've still got load of good years ahead of you.

anon1moos · 2018-06-27T17:23:39+00:00

Why are there so many people in here that think 30 is some kind of big deal for a guy?

lt's a reasonable thing for a woman, but you're not a woman and you don't have to worry about the wall.

ya'll are hopefully hitting your prime -right now-.

Would it have been better to have killed it in your twenties? Sure. But you didn't. That would have been the best time, but the second best time is -right now-.

I spent a lot of my 20's locked up. Get out there and do it man.

Wrath_of_Trump · 2018-06-27T18:05:50+00:00

Everyone on this sub over the age of 28. But don't listen to your mother, she is projecting her reality onto you. Men's shelf life is much longer.

[deleted] · 2018-06-27T18:21:11+00:00

A man is most attractive in his 30’s and 40’s if he takes care of himself. So you probably dodged a bullet by not signing a life binding legal contract in your 20’s. Your good man, use your 20’s to mine wisdom and make now builds the life you know you can.

The__Tren__Train · 2018-06-27T21:15:54+00:00

dude... you're 29 and not married?

better hurry up and tie the knot so you can get divorced and lose everything / be stuck with a fat, unappreciative, nagging ham

I know 8 guys who have been divorced

and that's just at my gym during the hours that I lift kek

neoda1 · 2018-06-27T16:48:19+00:00

I'm 22 now. When I was younger, the "Dream" was to be a bachelor and sleep around. Fuck all the women I could. Gain complete control over that area of my life.

Now, after years of living the "Dream", I'm not completely satisfied. I'm not truely happy. I feel I destroyed my capacity to pairbond, my empathy, and in large part the mystery and strong emotions I could feel, in comparison to not focusing on this part of my life pre RP. I love it all the same and love everything about my life, but hear me when I say The grass is Always greener on the other side. After a while being able to pull, gaming and spinning plates isnt as important. Most important thing is that you work towards what You want, Today. Your regrets can become blessings, getting what you want now might not be as important to 40 year old you. Step back and look at the bigger picture. Good luck.

resnine · 2018-06-27T16:58:51+00:00

I am also 29. I was literally just thinking this right before I opened up Reddit, "why didn't I seize the day? why didn't I grab life by the horns and just savor it more, why didn't I try to game more chicks?". I also spent a shit load of my 20s studying computer science and twiddling away my precious youth and time, I didn't even get my degree in it, still finishing up with another degree, which, I don't even know if I'll be able to get a job with it. I recall several times in my twenties where I was like "today! today! I am going to be different and live different and seize life" but I didn't, I don't know part of me feels like if you don't have money or are super-smart your life is just going to be that of a dullard and not much else. Or just being a crazy risk-taking motherfucker. Somewhere around 27 I just asked myself "What truly makes me happy? am I doing what makes ME happy?"... at that point I was studying hard computer science and advanced math and my social life and life in general had hit and all-time rock-bottom. I was extremely unhappy, masturbating 4-5 times a day as a coping mechanism. Hair was a mess, never brushed my teeth, worked a miserable low-paying job. I changed a few things and life past 27 has been better, but, I still feel like I am not achieving or have achieved nearly anything in my life, and as I am going to be 30 soon I just keeping doing this LIFE IN REVIEW thing, and asking myself all sorts of existential questions "who am I?", "why am I here?","where am I going?"... still don't have those answers. I feel quite lost in life, leaps and bounds better than where I was. My n-count is pathetically low, and the amount of partying/drinking/drugs is pretty much nil, some might thing this is a good thing, but those are ones who have already experienced the ups and downs of it. You all have had a varied life full of different adventures and fun. I am also unmarried/no kids. Let me know if you want to talk, I'd like someone my age and in a similar situation to discuss things with.

Thethrowawayoption · 2018-06-27T19:42:00+00:00

Almost everyone wastes a significant portion of their life because they don't know WTF they want, don't know how to get it, and don't have the self-discipline to work on it to the actual maximal extent possible.

Now that I am 29 I have a lot of pressure from my mother to get married. She thinks I am getting older and it will get difficult to get married once I am old.

Your mother is imagining your SMV works the same way hers did. She's especially wrong if you start taking better care of yourself. Either way, you're an adult now and can do with your life what you want. The only thing you need to pay attention to is the practical limits of biology. (as in, if you want kids, you're best off getting that done sooner rather than waiting til you're 50 to try it.)

I am a 29 year old guy...

...I think its too late for me now.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

I know dudes in their mid 40s who look like swole garden gnomes and have 8/10 level plates in their late 20s. Yes a lot of women won't date or fuck across that kind of age gap. Yes these guys are outliers and copying them is really fucking hard. But some dudes have learned how to find the ones who will and make it happen.

Giving up when you've barely started is the only way to guarantee you won't be like them. The only thing it's too late for is for you to be great at age 22. It's not at all too late to do whatever else you want from here forward. Depression is a common phase when you find out your whole past worldview was wrong. Force yourself to focus on the future and on positives. Your past failures were NOT avoidable by you, of the past. But current and future you may be able to avoid the same failures, and that's all you can ask for.

TFWnoLTR · 2018-06-27T19:11:12+00:00

I'm 31 and up until this year I felt the same way. The trick is to just get over it. It's really not worth it giving any fucks about the past or anything else you can't change.

Move forward with your life. Stand up to your mother. Try talking with a decent therapist if you need to. It really did wonders for me.

Your 30s can easily be your prime years. You're not really old yet. It's a perfect time to turn a new leaf and stop regretting the past.

I'm still fat and I just banged a 22 year old girl last night. She was no swimsuit model, but no hamplanet either. You can have tons of fun if you just let go of the past and work for the future and present.

Trposh · 2018-06-28T11:11:49+00:00

I'm in my mid-30s, became RP aware right around the same age as you are now, and know how it feels. Whenever I find myself regretting past decisions or missed opportunities, I remember the following pieces of advice that I've seen in various threads on these forums:

Time is always going to keep on passing, no matter what. In that way, time is a bitch. Some day, tomorrow is going to be today. Same with next year, and same with ten years from now. When that time comes, do you want to look back on this day with more regret or would you rather be like damn, I'm sure glad I turned things around? Don't let regret over past decisions or missed opportunities keep you from taking action today. You can turn things around - the only thing stopping you is you.
The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is today. I love this metaphor because it reminds me that, just like how trees take time to grow, change doesn't happen overnight - I'm not going to see instant results - but if I want to taste that sweet fruit, I've gotta plant that tree today so I can reap the rewards of my labor down the road.

Also, what other people said: Your life isn't over when you hit 30. Your 30s can be the best years of your life. Feeling sorry for yourself because you "missed out on your 20s" will get you nowhere.

Visualize your ideal lifestyle, and then go make it happen. STARTING TODAY. You can do it, man. Anybody can. Just don't be a fuckin' pussy, and take responsibility for your own happiness.

Mr_Badass · 2018-06-27T17:50:45+00:00

Lift and get to 15% Body Fat. You will look at least 5 years younger. It's time for you to enter Monk Mode.

red_matrix · 2018-06-27T18:08:35+00:00

Lift weights, focus on being the best version of yourself. That's all you can do, women come and go. Nowadays it's almost impossible to get a woman to commit, even if you wanted to. Never forget AWALT, follow the Pook and understand that it's a cruel universe, we're here for a good time, not a long time.

thegreattot · 2018-06-27T20:00:47+00:00

You know ...I'm 22 and I was stressing that I had wasted the last 4 years of my life doing nothing but fucking tons of girls and getting fucked up on every vice you can think of. I think you'll always regret the path you didn't follow you are in your prime though bro so if you're bored it's never to late to get trashed with 23 year old girls .

TheIcePill · 2018-06-27T17:23:00+00:00

You're 29, go get hookers, there you go, you have slept with a lot of women, problem solved.

cobalt1728 · 2018-06-27T21:48:11+00:00

Why the FUCK, do you think you still can't sleep with more women? What, because your age no longer has a 2 in the first digit?

And what the hell man, why are you letting preasure from your mother get to you? I tell me mom shes never getting grandkids and I am never getting married. "It is 2018, not 1918 Mom..."

Stop with this bullshit.

Sumshot · 2018-06-27T22:17:17+00:00

Don't listen to your mother. Don't fall into the same trap as at least 50% of your friends.

The following will enlighten you about your current position in life: https://therationalmale.com/2012/06/04/final-exam-navigating-the-smp/

After that, take a look at the MRP sub to get a grasp what getting married _really_ means.

After that, you will probably feel better. :)

[deleted] · 2018-06-27T18:10:46+00:00

It's cool, in my mind that's what my 20's were for.

Inceltyrone · 2018-06-27T18:59:21+00:00

You can just lie about your age.

Merwebb · 2018-06-28T13:04:57+00:00

I feel like that. I'm currently looking to meet women, getting fit, eating right, getting hobbies, the works.

I used to be a blue billy big time in my 20s.

But i can't regret, is what brought me to take deep looks inside. Now what's important is to keep moving forward, to be the best I've ever been every day.

Sucks that most people my age are into the "fuck im getting old" or the "fuck im already old" phase. It kinda gives a perspective on social normatives and self programming. Fuck all of that

IncognitoMaster91 · 2018-06-28T14:50:38+00:00

It's only a waste if you didn't learn anything. And it seems that at 29 turning 30 you have learned how to be more introspective and conscious about your actions..so it seems you didn't waste your 20's.

You learned how not to waste your 30's.

So go on and start a new chapter. Forget the old. Keep the good lessons you learned from the mistakes and make the 30's be double awesome.

Incaahhh · 2018-06-27T16:57:16+00:00

I'm 24 right now. Guess what? I'm not in a rush to do anything atm. Will life be over when I'm 30? No. Do I have to get married before a certain age? No. I know how to take care of myself physically, I'm still learning the physiological aspect. Stop reminiscing about the past when the present in your face.

diggrecluse · 2018-06-27T20:29:27+00:00

Yes this is very common. I used to whine and bitch about it all the time. Then I realized that does jack shit for me so I decided to just live my life. Make the best of the time you do have. There's no magical rule that your 20s have to be your best years, it's what YOU make your best years.

Zanford · 2018-06-27T21:52:22+00:00

You're still young. 29 is young in male SMV terms. Get jacked, work on your career and your game, you've got decades of good years ahead.

RivenHalf · 2018-06-27T21:59:58+00:00

Also 29, I leave with you a quote I just saw on here not too long ago...

"The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago, the second best time is now."

Stop thinking, start working

huntersam13 · 2018-06-27T22:25:28+00:00

nope... spent my 20s in China, single... livin the dream.. I am wasting my 30s though after knocking up a psycho

purplefidgetmidget · 2018-06-27T22:35:03+00:00

I didn't get laid until I was in my 20s, and I was so envious of people that did. Even at college I had little luck. Thought those young hotties were a thing of the past for me.

But I read TRP and all kinds of associated stuff, put it into practice instead of just talking about it, and a 20 year old HB9 took me back to her student flat after a night out and the rest is history. I'm mid 30s. Never imagined that kind of thing was possible.

3d_truth · 2018-06-28T06:14:40+00:00

Too late? lol I fucked literally one girl, two times from the age of 20 up until 29. This year (still 29, 30 in one week) I have fucked around 20 girls from ages 17-27 some girls so hot I cant believe it.

Do you know what the biggest waste of time is? Complaining about wasting time. Not only are you wasting your time, you are feeling miserable about it too. This is literally what you are doing. Take a step back and just realize how fucking stupid that is.

What ever you did in the past was the perfect thing for you. Why? Because it lead you up to this moment and gave you the motivation to transform into the person you want.

Whatever you did in the past is just a story you tell yourself in your mind, it doesnt tell you who you are, it doesn't even exist, so don't worry about it. I couldn't give 2 fucks if I didn't spend my past wisely. All I care about is this moment now.

Also, fuck your mum. Don't give into her pressure. She wants you to be married so she can say to her friends that her son is getting married and has a normal life. Life your own life. Your 30s will be the best decade of your life.

dongpal · 2018-06-28T10:01:19+00:00

You either have fucked a lot of girls in your 20s or you have worked a lot and achieved good financial position.

As you can read in the comments, people here have done only one thing proper, because they are too young to be able to have experienced both worlds. People who only experienced one world always think the grass is greener on the other side. So just focus on the women and you are fine.

michaelmindset · 2018-07-01T02:10:43+00:00

It’s all a bunch of carrots my friend. The job, wife, kids, “success”...we live and we die, nothing more. Whatever story you are telling yourself exist only in your head, and you can choose to rewrite it any time you wish. Don’t let societal pressure get to you, you sound like a guy who has a level head. I respect that you don’t do drugs or drink alcohol, I don’t either...your health will thank you for it. Not married? Well honestly marriage is quite a shit deal for men anyways. In all honesty you sound like you have your shit together way more than 90% of people I know. Cheers to your 30s

ronalddrump69 · 2018-06-27T17:24:29+00:00

I'm 21 and have girls over every 1-2 weeks, it's not that special. Would rather do good at school and hang out with my buddies

casual_redditor_01 · 2018-06-27T19:05:03+00:00

If you could go back and tell yourself what to enjoy, cherish, and work on what would it be?

[deleted] · 2018-06-27T19:22:49+00:00

Better than wasting your whole life

zboo1h · 2018-06-27T19:35:39+00:00

Get this: one day (if you're lucky to not be run over by a bus or die of cancer) you'll be 80 and close to death. What will you do then?

excent · 2018-06-27T21:19:17+00:00

29 here too, I was thinking the same way at the beginning of the year, but then I started going to the gym and studying different career paths and now I don't give a fuck what my age is. I'm going to make my 30s the best years and so on. It's just a number

andtoc · 2018-06-27T21:23:09+00:00

Fuck, man. Thanks for the wake up call. I am 24 and I'd better get my shit sorted out.

Kabuki431 · 2018-06-27T21:49:54+00:00

Yep i did but now i am spinning plates faster than a industrial dishwasher. 😎😎

TRPKiddo · 2018-06-27T22:12:27+00:00

Never too late, brother.

boy_named_su · 2018-06-28T00:53:22+00:00

There's no getting it out of your system. The more you get the more you want

TheLanternFlame · 2018-06-28T01:20:53+00:00

Same, but that's how we get here today. So it's not a regret for me, it's the path that I have chosen. Whether it was a good run or a bad run, it still molded to who I am today.

[deleted] · 2018-06-28T02:05:12+00:00

This might not help you that much but well I think a lot of people would say the same thing (wasted their 20s) for a lot of different reasons.

I don't think studying is 'bullshit' for one, and in my case I wish I studied more. Not that I was lazy, it's just I knew that I could make more out of my college years. As for girls well you could say I was lucky enough to have few reasonable relationships. It's good that you at least slept with women few times. Many other guys don't even have that luxury.

As for what your mother said, that's what I'd call BS. Nothing against your mom but guys usually have better chance finding better partners during late 20s to early 30s. We're usually more matured, better at detecting red flags (hopefully anyway) and financially more adequate so that gives us an edge over younger guys.

But well, YMMV.

camknight15 · 2018-06-28T02:10:25+00:00

I’m 20 and I’m afraid that I will end up the same way.

Toxik6 · 2018-06-28T04:12:01+00:00

You sound like me. I’ve decided to not be in a relationship till I’m ready to commit. I’m giving myself 6 years.

meme_poacher · 2018-06-28T04:22:52+00:00

Any advice for a 19 year old?

downvotesanimals · 2018-06-28T05:19:48+00:00

I slayed way more pussy in my 30th and 31st years than i did in my entire 20s. Took me a bit to figure things out, but was worth it in the end.

Eulerbrah · 2018-06-28T09:25:44+00:00

you're sad because you couldn't sleep with a lot of women?? huh..

Helpmedecideplz2008 · 2018-06-28T13:34:59+00:00

not me bud, i chewed more ass than a shark in a swimming pool.

Gamelova · 2018-06-30T19:55:14+00:00

My situation is the opposite of yours. I'm in the early 20s. I discovered TRP sometime in April of this year. As my Reddit name suggests, I have consumed a lot of my time playing video games. Without going into my story, I am trying to find a balance between improving and using my life with TRP and studying and not flunking out of college.

Locoboy713 · 2018-06-27T20:23:18+00:00

Amen dude. Mindset of abundance and we are always the fucking prize.

Black_m0ngoose · 2018-06-27T20:39:37+00:00

You'll live until you're 100, and probably be lifting into your 80's if you're taking care of yourself.

Do not look back on the past unless it's only for reference. Look to the future. The present is the only moment you have control over.

You have plenty of time, but time is precious, son don't waste it on regrets. Learn from your past. Control your future.

Don't want to settle down? Don't. Your parents aren't living your life.

Casd12 · 2018-06-28T02:27:20+00:00

Lol you're almost 30 and you're still taking orders from your mom? Comon, live your own life

PhaedrusHunt · 2018-06-28T05:19:35+00:00

Ask your mom for sex tips

room_303 · 2018-06-28T09:35:38+00:00

There a flip side that - Life is ultimately meaningless in and outside yourself. Everyone's been programmed to think they are THIS PERSON, who's story is special and just like 'those movies I watched growing up or the Rock star i loved and revered' - Reality - living in this century is the worst time to be alive, It's the dark ages where government doesn't give a fuck, immigrants are taking over, Money does nothing outside of buying essentials like food and shelter to keep your body running and brain calculating and rummaging with thoughts that portray things that never happen or did long ago.

90% of the women you find around you now are useless tattooed up sluts who can't cook, clean and think it's anti-women to do so - uber eats. They'll earn and save, buy the things they need and live a better lifestyle than men simply because girls don't self-police like men, they'll never get a back turned on them and can get jobs with their intuned crafty social intuition.

Most people who went to college will are or soon realize they just wasted a few years and got into thousands of dollars of student debt with the banks all for a useless piece of paper - They either can't even land a job in their field or soon realize the job they get is possibly really shit, add to that, all the womenz now in the workplace, any small wrong gesture will get you in front of HR, whom have to side with the vagina.

Win, lose - it doesn't really matter, money will not make you happy, either will working till you die, the good eras of working hard and being paid well with a gold watch at the end are long gone, home ownership - forget it, 90% of women these days aren't worth it either, cunt attitude, gargantuan entitlement, fat, tattoos, blue hair, entitlement, #metoo era - anytime a girl feels now she can say she said no, then moan about this all over insta-facebook-social-shit to 1000's of women and you are then guilty BEFORE being proved innocent

"Reflect too on the yawning gulf of past and future time, in which all things vanish. So in all this is must be folly for anyone to be puffed with ambition, racked in struggle, or indignant at his lot—as if this was anything lasting or likely to trouble him for long" - Marcus Aurelius

Self-honest · 2018-06-27T19:10:41+00:00

Who the fuck cares???

Two_kids_in_a_coat · 2018-06-27T19:40:27+00:00

Dies anyone else think this guys gonna waste his 30’s wishing that he didn’t waste his 20’s?

seedster5 · 2018-06-28T05:30:19+00:00

You sound like a brownie

ValorElite · 2018-07-13T04:24:10+00:00

I am a 29 year old guy and by the end of this year I will be 30. It seems it was only yesterday when I was 22.

No offense, but how the fuck did you let time go to waste that badly? I mean I get it if you are a drug addict and the days start to blend together, but if you completely sober and active member in society?

I wanted to get this out of my system

Spinning the male hamster: instead of focusing on getting your life on track to be the best it possibly could, you were fucking around for 10 years.

Nothing to do now expect get to work.

Title	Does anyone else think they wasted their 20s?
Author	acertenay
Upvotes	124
Comments	121
Date	June 27, 2018 4:31 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/8ub1ww/does_anyone_else_think_they_wasted_their_20s/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/does-anyone-else-think-they-wasted-their-20s.800 https://theredarchive.com/post/800

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