[deleted by user]

seduction-ModTeam · 2022-09-21T12:36:36+00:00

This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different:

A field report explains a lesson learned or demonstrates a Seduction concept.
If the point of this post is asking how to get that specific girl, it belongs in AskSeddit.

No worries though! Though the thread has been taken down, any conversations you have started here can still continue, and if you want to PM a mod to get their opinion on this thread, feel free to do so and they will still be able to weigh in.

For next time, remember that posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person are fine as field should be directed to Ask Seddit (/r/askseddit), not to be confused with Ask Reddit.

fookincharlie · 2022-09-21T03:32:39+00:00

Good job dude 👊. You did more than 99% of dudes would do and approached an attractive chick. Maybe you'll only get positive interactions with 2/3 but you did the hardest part.

maxpossimpible · 2022-09-21T08:06:54+00:00

It's a numbers game. Great that you found the courage to walk up to her 💪💪💪 Think of it this way: You lose 10 minutes of your time, if you do this 10-20 times, you've lost 3 hours. And maybe you've found the love of your life.

That's a pretty good time investment instead of sitting on tinder for hours upon hours... chatting with girls that get literally ten messages per minute from horny dudes.

yo_saturnalia · 2022-09-21T06:23:08+00:00

What did you ask? What did she say? You have literally given zero info

Liberaler · 2022-09-21T03:54:33+00:00

your analysis might be wrong. Don't be so negative
maybe she was just nervous or overwhelmed. Maybe you forgot to smile because you were nervous and therefore came across a little weird.
don't judge her reaction so quickly. There are women, who react that way and still give you the number and meet up with you in the end. Others react positively and flake.

pierre_WaP · 2022-09-21T08:50:31+00:00

Don’t worry mate. You tried. That’s all that counts, and now you know king!

It is likely she is not into you. When a girl’s eyes are bulging intently with no smile, I interpret that as fear. Especially one word answers.

But that doesn’t matter. Move onto the next woman. Keep swiping through them my man.

caesarfecit · 2022-09-21T05:52:21+00:00

The riddle with reading interactions like these, is often the way we behave when we're crushing on someone to an embarassing degree is often very similar to when we're militantly disinterested in someone.

Some other poster suggested that unbroken eye contact is a sign of feeling threatened. If this was the proper read, the rest of her behavior would reflect that. She'd exit the conversation at her first opportunity, physically put distance between you guys, and otherwise give off even more awkward signs. She'd also be unlikely to give you her name.

This actually sounds like garden-variety awkwardness. Sounds like she was trying to be social, but was all distracted/preoccupied by working out or whatever else was going on in her life, so her cues were both ambiguous and transparent.

What the other guy overlooks is unbroken eye contact can often be a sign of extreme attraction, especially if preceded by a bunch of cross-room glances. In fact, the longer and harder a girl holds eye contact with you, the more powerful a sign of interest it is.

Now I'm not saying this girl is for sure crushing on you. I'm saying it's possible. You haven't given us a ton to go on, and her signals are very mixed/unclear.

My advice is this:

If she's into you, she'll re-engage sooner or later. If not, she'll do her best to ignore you. You did your job, you approached and broke the ice. If she wants something to happen, she knows she needs to give you something to go on. Play it cool and wait for her to give you a sign.

In the future, this is also why it is a good idea not to stall when you want to chat a girl up. The longer you wait, the greater the odds one or both of you will psych yourself out. That could very well be what happened here.

immataxpayer · 2022-09-21T09:29:17+00:00

Better oops than what if.

YouGotTangoed · 2022-09-21T11:51:20+00:00

Next time think twice about opening girls at the gym. You have everything to lose, not much to gain. Girls love the attention at gyms, and maybe some will be receptive, but most times it’s better to approach after you’ve left the gym. As for her, she now knows her value is up at the gym, and you are left feeling worse off

ZirkonX · 2022-09-21T11:05:41+00:00

What a fucking supportive community 👍👌

Yarmanite · 2022-09-21T08:37:47+00:00

She was probably wondering why you were staring at her

Magneto_1 · 2022-09-21T12:36:18+00:00

And that’s how it starts, keep on approaching until you are good at it!

Longjumping-Plant546 · 2022-09-21T13:54:15+00:00

The other thing - a girl’s mood shifts a lot. She may one day be all head over heels and another day quite not feeling it. As someone said already, she will initiate again if interested. Or maybe just smile or say hi the next time to give a gentle nudge. If she’s cold going forward, better to drop.

incognito3107 · 2022-09-21T07:48:11+00:00

Was it really THE MOST awkward? You approach a girl, break couple of words, find out she is not that responsive, said smooth goodbye. What is so bad here?

froze_gold · 2022-09-21T11:34:08+00:00

Could've been social paralysis from getting approached so unexpectedly. Most guys, including myself, never approach in the gym. Mad respect

Trooth_Sayer216 · 2022-09-21T07:45:08+00:00

Kudos for going for it and kudos again for keaving the interaction when you felt that it wasnt your way. It talks guts dude and self awareness to leave an interaction in due time.

MayhemReignsTV · 2022-09-21T09:17:27+00:00

Some women don’t know how to react. They are not generally used to it and are almost never expecting it. I just got the number of this hot chick I was sort of acquaintances with years ago. I would have never been her type back in the day nor had the guts to approach her. Here’s why I mentioned this. At first, she was stunned and actually froze. At that point, you have to keep the conversation moving but don’t just move off to another topic. Because it just sounded like the person that you approached was feeling awkward because she just wasn’t used to it. In my case, I was the last person she expected it from. I mean we are talking close to 20 years here since I seen this girl and I used to be shy as hell. She even used to make fun of me a little bit. You can’t really blame her because I make fun of how I used to be 😂 I think that’s why I regarded her as a possible challenge. But personal progress is always something to be proud of, no matter where you came from.

-TheseHandsDontHaze- · 2022-09-21T07:17:58+00:00

Don’t approach at gyms it’s weird

Get in get out and grab a knarly pump, anywhere else is fine to approach tho

Think_History_5682 · 2022-09-21T05:13:01+00:00

She likely has a bf

Alphachadbeard · 2022-09-21T07:38:43+00:00

Appreciate you just moving on when she gave you the deadface it won't always go that way baby stay sharp!

sussykeke · 2022-09-21T07:55:30+00:00

She could've been checking you out and was just too shy to interact, or you caught her off guard or whatever.

You mentioned you usually approach girls at the gym in a friendly manner.. which kinda implies you approached this girl in a different manner. Maybe you were trying too hard to be pickup-y instead of just trying to have a conversation with a woman

Or she really did not like you and was just staring at you for whatever reason.

Could be anything, at the end of the day, it doesn't really matter. Don't take it personally, if you were hotter/richer/better you'd still get rejected a lot by women.

curisax · 2022-09-21T08:30:18+00:00

it's a numbers game You took your shot and she wasn't into you. It's all good. Doesn't sound THAT awkward either, tbh

There's nothing you could have done.

On to the next!!

Vampire-circus · 2022-09-21T09:18:20+00:00

I have to say.. I zone out at the gym and I probably look like I’m staring at people… just lost in my caffeine riddled mind while I listen to a podcast and try to remember who I am after a heavy lift. I then feel like a creep when I notice movement and realize someone was in my line of sight the whole time haha. So she may have been doing something similar. No harm no foul, just is what it is.

rumsticks · 2022-09-21T10:12:59+00:00

Don’t approach at gym man. People are there to hustle not socialise..

Professional_Base117 · 2022-09-21T11:19:17+00:00

Well you could try again by saying the last convo you had was kinda awkward. It might get a giggle outta her. If it doesn’t then you failed twice .At that point i would just cancel my gym sub lmao.

WanyCaleb · 2022-09-21T07:47:31+00:00

2 minutes isn't enough time to gauge proper interest. You wanna talk for some time like 10 minutes, get her to properly warm up and if she's still cold then peace out! And remember it's only awkward if you make it. Thank you and good night!

ftdrain · 2022-09-21T10:17:36+00:00

Unless she gave you blatant signs, dont be so quick to judge disinterest, we vastly, I repeat vastly overestimate our ability to judge what other people are thinking. Listen to this weeks episode on Hidden Brain

Jasonhardon · 2022-09-21T11:07:37+00:00

If she’s hot she may only seem disinterested until you prove them otherwise. That’s the world they live in. Hotter the girl the faster you usually need to close. Why because they have options everywhere they go and memories disappear fast. So you should’ve closed much like a Joey Tribianni would do. It’s funny to watch on television but what he actually does is what a quintessential PUA does. Picks them up on the spot. Why? because later is not guaranteed

Newb3258 · 2022-09-21T11:52:14+00:00

conker1264, can you please state your height, weight....? You said she was checking you out and that still may be possible.... I don't mean to hate on short guys or frail guys, but I think in a gym setting physical specimens just have a tremendous edge.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	166
Comments	74
Date	September 21, 2022 3:29 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/xjtkqs/approached_my_gym_crush_it_was_the_most_awkward/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1249628 https://theredarchive.com/post/1249628

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