how to date to marry, and be a wife material?

LiftsLinage · 2023-03-20T10:58:20+00:00

Hi, Guy here. 27.

I doubt it has much to do with your looks, I was in a relationship for 8 years with a woman and honestly only once thought that I wanted to propose but didn't because she treated me awfully and she just wasn't marriage material.

A bit after that relationship ended I started dating my now wife and honestly couldn't wait to lock it down due to how she acted and treated me.

The right energy will absolutely give off wife vibes.

She was serious about me and our relationship from the very beginning. It made all the difference. Being treated like a priority instead of an option is what made the difference.

babyegirll · 2023-03-20T13:08:44+00:00

I've found that I generally don't like to be around people who are too blunt, especially if I don't know them well. The whole "I'm just honest/I just say it how it is/I dont hold back" does NOT always read as just an open and honest person. To me, this reads as "I don't have the ability to filter my thoughts and my thoughts are usually not nice."

On another note, my boyfriend and I laugh and joke together all the time and I would genuinely say that he is my best friend. Being silly/joking does not mean that he wont take you seriously as a partner. Men want a woman with a sense of humor. They just want you to have a similar sense of humor to them if youre going to spend your life together.

It might also be that they can tell that you're getting bored. You need to ask yourself, what part of a serious relationship bores you? Are you at a point in your life where you actually want a relationship? I think you might need to look into yourself more.

LateralThinker13 · 2023-03-20T13:56:02+00:00

I know I have a lot to work on but please tell me from where do I start.

Read some of the sidebar materials (such as Secrets of Fascinating Womanhood), and learn the difference between immature and childlike. You don't want to come across as immature, but childlike is a desirable quality. A young woman who is smiling, happy, and engaged in her hobbies is one who is attractive. One who is overly emotional and flighty, unpredictable and irrational is not.

I also find myself attracted and attracting guys that are more on the younger side (22-25) that maybe not really into commitment and even when I talk to a guy that looks serious, I either get bored or he ghosts me.

Two questions here. What does a guy who looks serious to you mean? And why do you get bored with them?

DesertSerpent7 · 2023-03-20T15:17:19+00:00

The best way to get men to take you seriously is by taking yourself seriously. If you enjoy dating as a passive, fun thing then guys are going to see you as a passing fun thing. Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world.

You also didn’t mention any wife activities like cooking and stuff. How is a guy supposed to see a wife in bands and tiktok? Try getting away from tiktok. It’s a huge red flag to have that app in your ear constantly pushing it’s anti-family agenda in the algorithm. It will cause damage.

Want to be seen as a wife? Do more wife things. You didn’t mention anything that is a qualifying trait for wife status. Bubbliness and sarcasm means nothing to men in the context of selecting a long term partner. What do you provide to his life that he can’t get anywhere else? That should be your question.

silkflowers47 · 2023-03-20T09:09:42+00:00

You need to become the type of person you want to attract. If you want someone to take you as serious dating material, you need to become serious dating material. You need to first look like serious dating material and eventually talk and act as serious dating material. Dating is like a competitive market and you are the product. You need to improve and become your potential if you want to date at your potential.

What did your crush do or act that you wanted to be in a relationship with him? Describe you and describe him some more for context

CountTheBees · 2023-03-20T09:15:22+00:00

Im very bubbly, blunt and even child like and when talking to guys I don't hold back.

Can you provide an example of you being blunt? Can you provide an example of you not holding back?

soulwind42 · 2023-03-20T10:49:35+00:00

Well, it sounds like you're at a good start to me, the thing that makes me curious is you saying you get bored? What do you mean by "when I talk to a guy that looks serious, I either get bored..."? Like, what does serious look like to you? And what's boring about it?

Dating with a purpose is just about making your intentions clear, and not settling for less than that. "Wife material" is a little more convulted, but in general, it means being somebody to build a life with.

madeline3510 · 2023-03-20T11:10:10+00:00

He liked her better and that's okay. Check out some YouTube videos from women who have been married long or talk to couples in your church (if you attend)!

LocalCap5093 · 2023-03-20T09:14:21+00:00

I’d say first- stop comparing yourself to her. It’s not what she has that you don’t, you’re both different period. Might be a personality trait, interests or hobbies, etc. he simply might’ve not been your match.

I’d suggest being mindful when dating (especially if dating online) always being clear about intent for a serious relationship. Since you’re 22, I’d recommend searching partners younger than 30 but older than 24. The in between are men who might already have a job or close to done with school and are looking to settle down and start something.

As someone who’s first almost engagement came from a man when I was 19 and him 29… I’d stay away from big age gaps like you 22 and him 30 tbh. I got married at 26 (took him 4 months to propose but had given me a 1.5 ct promise ring by month 2 lol then took us 5 months more to wed) he was 32 when we met. Closer age gap.

The right man will ‘put a ring on it’ . Work on yourself imo and don’t be too desperate to find a guy, trust the process

cohost3 · 2023-03-20T16:24:39+00:00

With being “childlike,” there is a very delicate line from being charming to being immature or down right annoying. It can also be easily detected as disingenuous. Be careful how you use this.

Blunt people are often not pleasant to be around. Maybe a very specific man might enjoy it, however, it is usually not a desired characteristic in a wife.

willowaverie · 2023-03-21T05:45:25+00:00

I feel like it hasn’t been mentioned enough- most high value men I know do not care to be sent tiktoks and being able to scroll- it’s a distraction and takes away. A lot of them that I personally know find it annoying and unattractive to be hooked on it or always be sharing things. Fangirling isn’t classy, it can be cute/funny but in the right context. You may be too blunt as well. The way you wrote about yourself sounds very young and college like- maybe this girl has a more mature sound (none of this is to drag you down) it’s just something to note, that’s still gives off too young to settle down vibes.

Miserable-Read7597 · 2023-03-22T00:02:09+00:00

Read the Surrendered Single! Someone in this sub recommended it to me. I read and took the advice and my husband found me 6 months later ❤️

diaryofalostgirl · 2023-03-20T15:12:01+00:00

Why are you looking to settle down and get married now? Honest question. It's perfectly all right to be a wife who fangirls and sends funny Tiktoks, but from the sound of things, if it weren't for the great commitment question, you simply wouldn't be ready for the kind of man who is thinking wife and children. He's too boring. So why now, when the men you're attracting and attracted to are younger and more like you in personality, but not necessarily ready to marry?

Bodybuilder_Busy · 2023-03-20T18:22:40+00:00

The dating apps DESPERATELY need more women like you. I have not been able to find a single quality match in my location in an entire year. By posting this, you already showing that you are wife material because you actually care about what men want (instead of hating us like our education system and media want you to).

Keep working on this, and you will land a real man.

frvalne · 2023-03-21T21:01:11+00:00

Well first of all, it could just be, that he fell in love with her and didn’t fall in love with you. People don’t choose a checklist, they choose a person. So keep that in mind and don’t be hard on yourself.

AutoModerator · 2023-03-20T08:18:52+00:00

Title: how to date to marry, and be a wife material?

Full text: I was scrolling through my instagram feed and saw that a guy I've been talking to a year ago and that was "not ready for anything serious" just got engaged to a girl that's a year younger than me and I'm 22 so it hit me that maybe I'm doing something wrong.

I'm still a college student but so is the other girl, she is very pretty and so am I, we are vert close in age, we live in the same city, so it's not the way I look or my age or anything but maybe it's my personality and the way I act.

Im very bubbly, blunt and even child like and when talking to guys I don't hold back.

You can find me fangirling about an artist I like, or a book I read, sending tiktoks I find funny, always laughing and joking, maybe that's why no guy took me seriously.

I also find myself attracted and attracting guys that are more on the younger side (22-25) that maybe not really into commitment and even when I talk to a guy that looks serious, I either get bored or he ghosts me.

I know I have a lot to work on but please tell me from where do I start.

I want to know how to attract and be attracted to the right guys and date with purpose, how to make them take you seriously, how to be a wife material?

^{This is the original text of the post and this is an automated service}

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

stare_at_the_sun · 2023-03-20T22:16:18+00:00

It will vary for each person - Past relationship wanted me to be more open, so they could be there for me. Current partner wants me to keep anything more than surface level to myself. I think being the best version of yourself will attract whoever you are compatible with.

HappySpinningSeal · 2024-02-14T18:43:31+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	how to date to marry, and be a wife material?
Author	tr1shylol
Upvotes	49
Comments	54
Date	March 20, 2023 8:18 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/11wcsm6/how_to_date_to_marry_and_be_a_wife_material/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-to-date-to-marry-and-be-a-wife-material.1186986 https://theredarchive.com/post/1186986

Comments