'Hit the gym'.

Feinixaway · 2023-04-21T16:35:00+00:00

Going through a divorce can trigger many emotions, from anger to anxiety and depression.

Just pasting this from the internet:

Exercise reduces levels of the body's stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol. It also stimulates the production of endorphins, chemicals in the brain that are the body's natural painkillers and mood elevators. Endorphins are responsible for the "runner's high" and for the feelings of relaxation and optimism that accompany many hard workouts — or, at least, the hot shower after your exercise is over.

Behavioral factors also contribute to the emotional benefits of exercise. As your waistline shrinks and your strength and stamina increase, your self-image will improve. You'll earn a sense of mastery and control, of pride and self-confidence. Your renewed vigor and energy will help you succeed in many tasks, and the discipline of regular exercise will help you achieve other important lifestyle goals.

Exercise and sports also provide opportunities to get away from it all and to either enjoy some solitude or to make friends and build networks. "All men," wrote St. Thomas Aquinas, "need leisure." Exercise is play and recreation; when your body is busy, your mind will be distracted from the worries of daily life and will be free to think creatively.

Basically exercise reduces stress and makes you feel better about yourself. Some people cope by drinking, but alcohol is a depressant and it will make you feel worse afterwards.

It also helps by channeling anger in a more positive way.

treshsocket · 2023-04-21T20:02:09+00:00

Much easier and quicker to fix/improve yourself physically than mentally. Plus what others said.

SelectionNo3078 · 2023-04-21T16:32:25+00:00

endorphins. blood flow. music pumping through my ear buds.

i usually feel terrible physically and emotionally when i get to the gym. i always feel a little better when i leave.

and of course i look better if i lift and exercise regularly

(i don't power lift or body build-i have a set routine i do most days-about 1.5 mile run and i hit 8-10 stations for light-to-moderate weight lifting. i'm in and out in about an hour or so)

WartimeDad · 2023-04-21T18:54:10+00:00

It’s just wisdom from experience.

When the mind is in a state of anguish, exercise releases chemicals that go to the brain and relieve that anguish. There are also obviously health benefits. Of all the options, exercise is probably the most beneficial thing available to treat mental anguish. It doesn’t require anybody else.

DickRichie14 · 2023-04-21T21:48:34+00:00

I just want to look good naked 🤷🏻‍♂️

Diablo_Canyon2 · 2023-04-21T22:27:39+00:00

A gym membership, therapy, and the men's group at church saved my life.

Fitness of mind, fitness of body, fitness of spirit.

ranchdaddo · 2023-04-22T00:06:39+00:00

Exercise is the most effective anti-depressant and it also happens to have lots of other good effects. Self-confidence that comes from it is powerful.

the-don-carlo · 2023-04-22T01:24:55+00:00

I got to the gym 4 nights a week. The feeling walking out of the gym is incredible, it’s addictive and it’s incredible for your well being and frame of mind

Try to have a FU attitude and listen to Iron Maiden 🤣

CaliDude75 · 2023-04-21T21:46:56+00:00

Some variation of physical activity is good. I’m not really a “gym bro” but I try to get 10k steps in a day, generally. It’s helped me lose weight, and has helped with energy levels, self-esteem and overall wellbeing.

Lately I’ve been doing CICO to accelerate my weight loss journey.

I think bottom line is any activity or hobby you can do that gets you off the couch feeling sorry for yourself and drinking yourself asleep is positive.

On the subject of alcohol, CICO has made me much more aware of consumption from just a calorie standpoint. Been subbing 0 calorie flavored seltzer lately instead of doubling down on canned cocktails, which was my old habit.

Drazicc85 · 2023-04-21T22:45:03+00:00

It’s great for stress management and anxiety reduction, two things that will peak in a divorce period.

EmCee311 · 2023-04-21T23:10:11+00:00

For me it was channeling all the anger and sadness in a healthy way. I always hit the gym, but I hit even harder and more seriously post divorce. I’m roughly 9% body fat and in the best shape of my life at 35. As others have mentioned, music, endorphins, blood flow - it all helps reduce stress. I have a six pack for the first time in my life and overall, the gym and exercise has been the best outlet for me.

MomentSpecialist2020 · 2023-04-22T04:06:44+00:00

Working the muscles releases antidepressants molecules, it’s great!

polarshred · 2023-04-22T05:04:06+00:00

Because humans are supposed to move our bodies. Regular life nowadays is so easy for most and that simply isn't healthy. We can simulate a lifestyle that is more natural for a human by going to the gym.

Hastle_Greyskull · 2023-04-22T10:55:03+00:00

I’ve never left the gym feeling worse than when I went in. Never. Even when I tore my groin muscle under a mono-lift. Still, better than any day sitting at home.

Everyone here has told you what the benefits are. Find a gym that does a program as a group. I was fortunate to find the best powerlifting group of men and women. This “Iron Therapy” saved my life.

Old-Macaroon8148 · 2023-04-22T11:04:45+00:00

Divorce is typically a huge hit to your confidence which is incredibly important to a guy. Getting yourself out of the house, improving your health and appearance, improved sleep etc. will greatly help when your in this situation. Plus there’s usually some eye candy that may help you forget about your ex wife a bit quicker.

San_Ra · 2023-04-22T19:35:01+00:00

Theres a number of reasons why.

The basic reasons. Get fit. Look good. Eye candy at the gym.

The more complicated: It gets you out of the house. It gives you a constructive way to burn your pent up energy (good and bad). The endorphins released during exercise help combat depression. Depending on how you gym its a social activity (trainer, group fitness, go with friends, accountability) during a period of time that you may not want to talk to people.

Other: Due to the above you are more likely to eat healthy. Less likely to drink or will drink less (alcohol). Generally you will sleep better. Have more energy. Feel more confident. Setting goals gives you a reason to do something.

The summary: at a time in your life when your life has been turned upside down. When you are feeling your lowest. When your stbx is pulling you down, trying to destroy your life or has destroyed your life. When you want to sit down and give up, eat bad food, drink expensive whisky, and put a bullet through your brain. You have a reason to get up. You have a friend you need to meet. You have a goal you need to reach. You have a reason to get up and go out.

And that reason is you. No one else. it's about you doing something for you. When it feels like the world is shitting on you. You can say No. I lifted more than i ever have. Ran further than i did last week. I did that. I made gains. I see myself as me for me! Fuck the world im doing ok!

(And maybe bang a gym bunny or two alongbthe way)

RichardCleveland · 2023-04-24T17:31:56+00:00

Immediate stress relief.

animalx3 · 2023-04-21T17:33:36+00:00

I recommend ppl do yoga and meditation at home. I also recommend you never turn down an offered hug. I also suggest books and reading at coffee shops and say high to everyone and be open. I’m an extroverted introvert and didn’t talk to ppl. I’m eating my own dog food and doing all this

pk2at · 2023-04-21T19:55:11+00:00

Not at all, the first thing I suggest is to fight back and hide your assets. Fighting is the best way for men to heal faster (i.e. if you really are a man). Much better than exercise, leads to huge release of stress hormones followed by even bigger surge in endorphins. If you fight and win, its a great feeling, if you lose, you'll still feel good that you gave it all you could

Apprehensive-Cost496 · 2023-04-22T14:23:06+00:00

Struggling through a set of heavy squats or whatever makes everything else look insignificant. I also use the mental exercise of AP smirking at me to then pound the heavy bag even harder.

For me, getting back into the routine has been a game changer. I clearly feel a difference mentally after a hard work out with the added bonus of seeing my body get more muscle and more defined over time. I don't know how old you are OP but I'm nearly 40 and I hate to say it but the average male in my age group is showing a little more jello around the waist line these days. Having women once again smiling after looking at my general physique has been a confidence booster for damn sure!

koolaidkid12345 · 2023-04-21T21:17:22+00:00

I think part of it is as men we have more testosterone to release in general right.. and while not everyone (or maybe not most men) lift weights on any sort of regular basis even when younger.. but there is a certain "hoorah" that goes along with it I think.. like.. we're powerful as men together working out or even alone or with just a buddy. A sort of brotherhood.. don't get me wrong.. lot more women than ever work out and many are beasts too (in a good way). There is also an aspect of getting yourself back in to a place you feel good. Most men that I know who work out and stay or get in shape.. feel great.. the release of endorphins when working out makes you happy, helps you sleep better.. and so on.

So I think it's a combo of things really but most if not all of those things make us as a whole feel better about ourselves, the world around us.. and thus keeps the mind off of an otherwise usually rough thing to go through for most.. even those that like to say its not.

Lastly there is a certain level of independence. Now that you're on your own again.. there is this sort of feeling of relief that you can just go pound out some weights or what not whenever you want and not have to check in with the ball and chain before you go. Also.. if you find yourself checking out some of the hotties in the gym (men or women.. whatever your pref is).. you don't have this "should I cheat.. could I cheat.. am I bad for looking" feeling any more. Maybe this last one is just me. :D

Title	'Hit the gym'.
Author	Zapped2311
Upvotes	24
Comments	30
Date	April 21, 2023 4:08 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/12u99g9/hit_the_gym/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/hit-the-gym.1214996 https://theredarchive.com/post/1214996

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