Why does she keep texting me after I got rejected?

Cat-Dude-1776 · 2022-01-15T23:48:30+00:00

She knows you want her, so she replies first whenever she needs a fix of attention. Fully knowing you’ll take the bait, she just reaps the benefits.

Break the cycle and don’t respond. You’ll have her wanting the free fix of attention, but you won’t give it to her.

Obviously, if you meet up with her, talk to her if she talks to you, but I would not engage and I would only say bare minimum to keep a convo going.

wakawah · 2022-01-16T00:04:44+00:00

She looks forward to rejecting you again.

didsomebodysaymyname · 2022-01-16T02:33:08+00:00

Well, maybe she wants attention like these other people said, and that's possible, but are these definitely rejections?

People do travel, and she said "we don't have that here." Did you give up after that? You could have just said, "Well wanna get a drink anyway?" If she turned you down after that on another excuse, sure, she's not interested, but idk, it seems like you framed these as rejections.

ksmith11011 · 2022-01-16T00:35:15+00:00

These are the ones you experiment with. Ever wondered what would happen if you straight up ignored a girl who was trying to get your attention? Test it with her.

dasanman69 · 2022-01-15T23:45:59+00:00

Free attention, plain and simple

hazrat_unmad · 2022-01-16T00:50:04+00:00

As someone who has been in the same situation, please move on. She is using you for attention. Remove toxic people from your life.

Woujo · 2022-01-16T02:24:23+00:00

Sometimes girls text just for attention, but this girl might still be interested in meeting. "We don't have that here lol" is a shit test; you should have plowed through it and be like "let's meet at X place at Y time." Girls sometimes act wishy washy about meeting unless you confidently press the gas.

Ask her out again, confidently and directly, and then if she says no ignore her texts.

daysinnroom203 · 2022-01-16T01:37:24+00:00

I don’t know- honestly this sounds a little vague. “ we don’t have that here” doesn’t sound like rejection to me, unless your leaving stuff out. If you don’t have it here ( whatever here is) where do you have it? Or what drink do you have that you’d recommend? I don’t know- that just doesn’t sound like rejection to me- just lack of good conversation

rkaniminew · 2022-01-16T02:10:48+00:00

Women enjoy texting, they enjoy affection, they enjoy attention.
She can continue this for years and still never have a desire to meet you or have a romantic interest in you. It doesn't bother her.

Background_Cobbler_4 · 2022-01-16T03:30:33+00:00

She's playing hard to get. Persistence is key untill told to stop. It's part of the game. U thought of surprising her? Lunch, Starbucks. Things that are nice catch a girl's eye. U got her, just play the game. If she wasn't interested, she wouldn't text u back.

LifeIC · 2022-01-16T03:36:21+00:00

What did you reply to her when she said the drinks weren't here? Keep the fun going. Reply saying not to worry you'll make your own concoction together. If she's sending you messages that's the beginning of any connection. You lead it in the direction you want it to go in and if you two click then it will. You just need to put in more effort. Be charming. Be fun. Make her want it.

uhhhOU812 · 2022-01-16T04:41:18+00:00

I don’t really have any advice but it does seem like guys tend to automatically say they were rejected but aren’t clear communicators.

A guy, whom I thought I was friends with (he has called me homie several times over our infrequent conversations), recently asked if I wanted to celebrate a good day I had at work. I said, “yeah, let’s go grab some tacos.” He weirded out and then said I rejected him. …soooo… I don’t know how that’s rejection. People need to be clear with their intentions and feelings.

mabden · 2022-01-16T01:57:06+00:00

She is fucking with you. Do not reply. Lose her number. Block her.

MegaManXanax · 2022-01-16T04:31:54+00:00

Ask her out one more time. If she gives another weird answer tell her you can’t tell if she wants to meet up or not. Do it in a non-needy way that communicates that you don’t really care if she doesn’t want to meet up, you just can’t tell where she’s at. If that doesn’t change anything then forget this girl.

asdf333aza · 2022-01-16T01:46:15+00:00

She wants your attention, not you. Just cause she doesn't want to date you doesn't mean you stop showing an interest in her (in her mind). You responding to her text is you validating her and giving her what she wants, while she refuses to give you what you want, which is a proper date with her. You're giving your attention away for free and she come around texting you looking for that attention when she desires it and she knows likely to give it to her.

Sensitive-Permit-877 · 2022-01-16T02:27:09+00:00

Anytime she texts you either just ignore her leave her on read. Or you instantly ask for a date. She says no it starts again. Never feed into her attention seeking

reddituser_05 · 2022-01-16T04:13:49+00:00

"I asked again to meet up and try out this drink she's been telling me about. She replied with "We don't have that here lol"" - what does that even mean?

Are you being direct and asking "Let's meet for dinner?"

gyrocosec · 2022-01-16T04:53:43+00:00

Attention

Harper_1482 · 2022-01-16T05:06:59+00:00

Validation..

shouldBeWaterguns · 2022-01-16T02:54:41+00:00

She wants to talk more before meeting up. Yeah she may only want your attention for now, but if you want anything else you're probably going to have to build that reality first.

tmankam · 2022-01-16T00:31:01+00:00

Block 👏 her 👏

Don’t worry, she’ll move on quickly.

stanthemilkman88 · 2022-01-16T05:07:36+00:00

Attention. Just ignore her for a month or so and try again if you are still interested.

NattyGains4Life · 2022-01-16T06:51:47+00:00

On the “we don’t have that here” i think you should’ve been more direct and say some shit like “okay then what do you have here?” “Ok this! Want to go? Yes or no?”

On your current situation I’d recommend trying one more time, but be direct, say what you mean and don’t beat around the bush

If she bullshits her way out of it but keeps messaging you afterwards, left her ass on “seen”

SebastianPatel · 2022-01-16T07:26:36+00:00

you didn't get rejected - neither of those are rejections. In fact, "lol" can be a flirty thing. Just ask her firmly and confidently, like "Dinner at 6pm at ____ on Saturday night, I will pick u up" - it doesn't have to be dinner but whatever it is just firm date/time and make it easy for her to go by offering to pick her up.

bamboobooboo · 2022-01-16T07:51:49+00:00

Maybe she only needs a friend at the moment, try and see if y'all can bring yalls friends for the date, it'll help you ask about her more as well

freaky533567556 · 2022-01-16T13:43:16+00:00

Sounds to me like she doesn't want to meet up but she does like the ego boost she gets from talking to you. Colossal waste of time, my dude.

Competitive_Trip5045 · 2022-01-16T15:53:06+00:00

The exact same thing happened to me last year. I went a step ahead and asked her the third time and kinda got rejected. AGAIN. But surprisingly she still somehow messaged a few more times and i was really not having it. Ignored her/ super late replies. (since i already knew nothings gonna happen anyway) i mean what does she even want now?

Cut to a few weeks later, She asked if i was free and would like to just hookup. Lol.

WorldlinessSlight373 · 2022-01-16T02:42:26+00:00

The other dude got sick of her shit, move on unless she’s got a legitimate reason

Ohhhwordddd · 2022-01-16T03:56:46+00:00

She wants attention. Leave her on seen and move on would be your best move imo

noobcola · 2022-01-16T02:36:48+00:00

So I do agree with most of the advice here about moving on from her since she sounds like she's playing games or whatever.

But maybe for fun (before you cut her off), you can just go "nuclear" on her: tell her that you're only interested in dating and not this bullshit back-n-forth texting next time she tries to get your attention

doovinator · 2022-01-16T01:05:35+00:00

Ask her. Say, "why do you do this? I don't like it. I feel like I'm being played." Let her know you won't be jerked around. See how she responds.

DonaldyPutin · 2022-01-16T05:13:59+00:00

Things are in your control if you know game.

kissmyasthma1 · 2022-01-16T06:21:56+00:00

At first I thought this was my story wth hahaha but in my situation tho I just like her (somewhat) as a friend. I genuinely just want to hang out. Why won’t you GO OUT WITH ME?!

Shadow__Account · 2022-01-16T08:59:49+00:00

Tbh it doesn’t necessarily sound like hard rejection and maybe if you’d show some non neediness and high value and take your time you’d get her to meet up with you. That being said I really believe you can’t turn a no girl into a yes girl so imo it would be wasted time, best thing you sleep with her and always feel uncomfortable walking on your toes to keep her until you lose her. Not worth it since there are many girls that would like to meet up with you eagerly

creedthot · 2022-01-16T09:44:07+00:00

Why don’t you just ask her a direct question? You aren’t being vague, but be less vague. “I like you and i want to take you out on a date. Is that something you’re interested in?” If she says no and texts you first after that, maybe she just wants a friendship, which is allowed, and you’re allowed to not want that also.

NiceWetTissue · 2022-01-16T10:07:48+00:00

Shittesting

WanyCaleb · 2022-01-16T12:12:39+00:00

Block her.

SeanBatemanJr · 2022-01-16T12:41:32+00:00

These might not have been real «rejections» at all. First time she probably was really traveling, and second time she really said this drink is not served in your area — and probably wanted to hear another offer, like «Let’s meet for coffee then» (or even "Let's drink something you have then"). Also a lot of times it takes months and dozens of offers to meet somebody for the first time — that’s just the reality. I remember writing one girl once in a week or two for 6 months before meeting her live. My ex-GF had cancelled first meet like 30 times — which reflected poorly on her organizational skills and temperament, but still wasn’t a sign of rejection or lack of interest. So the only answer is to be persistent and speak to multiple girls. If a girl is really not interested — she will usually black out and stop answering, and even then it is sometimes wise to send her offers to meet up once in a while, because you never know when one might come back.

prashant200 · 2022-01-16T13:33:34+00:00

Tell her, let’s not waste each other’s time

prashant200 · 2022-01-16T13:35:52+00:00

Understand this, there’s two type of girls 1. Who likes you because of who you are (maybe one night stand or relationship), the thing is both of you’ll have something 2. They just need validation from someone, because they didn’t got sex from long time, they are not in relationship, they are not having good day, some guy would have ignored her she was interested in

Stay away from validation type of girls, you’ll just waste your time

Twix1958 · 2022-01-16T13:49:37+00:00

What could also be is that she wants to date you, but is to scared, acknowledge it and talk about it, at least you'll learn something from it

HornsOnFire · 2022-01-16T14:16:28+00:00

I would say it's a nice move if you let her make the decision on what to do together. You'll make it clear once and for all.

UnknownThrowaway18 · 2022-01-16T14:25:51+00:00

So someone can validate her like calling her pretty. If you wanna to like you a lil more than call her ugly. Not call her ugly to be mean but as a funny joke. You can say “wassup ugly” r when she say do she look good so no r better yet just say you’re not honing to sleep with her tonight as a joke. Don’t over do it tho cuz it’ll just be annoying to her after a while. Just don’t simp for her n give her what she want if she’s that type of girl.

agonzale · 2022-01-16T15:55:27+00:00

She just wants attention. She has no intention in actually meeting. It has happened to me countless times, so it’s easy to spot that behavior right away. Just ghost her and move on.

ExquisiteGrowth · 2022-01-16T16:26:16+00:00

She wants validation/attention. Just leave it alone.

david10277 · 2022-01-16T16:27:44+00:00

Be straight. Meaning say

Let's meet next week Friday at 8pm at xxx Give date ,time, place no room doubts. She will accept or decline..

She declines just say.." I would like to see you, so you let me know what works"

That's it..no more contact , no.more followups, dont read her stories or like her post of ask agian.

Those are the subtle signs she will pick up on that your not giving her any more attention until she sees you. Your not that guy for attention only.

I have a new girl I'm dating doing the same thing. My last text message with her she said she was busy and she will call me tomorrow" That's where I left it and it will stay.. ball is in her court.

When she does..if will pick up where it left off. But NO Chasing ..persue ..but dont chase..theres a difference.

throwaway_6196190012 · 2022-01-16T16:36:00+00:00

If a girl wants to meet up with you she will make it easy

Title	Why does she keep texting me after I got rejected?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	228
Comments	88
Date	January 15, 2022 11:41 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/s4xqaj/why_does_she_keep_texting_me_after_i_got_rejected/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-does-she-keep-texting-me-after-i-got-rejected.1268974 https://theredarchive.com/post/1268974

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