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Spinuchi · 2021-09-24T19:48:02+00:00

Night and day difference.

For me I wasnt huge with this difference. I was about 35 lbs overweight And had a "dad bod". Started going to the gym and losing weight slowly while also gaining muscle. Since then i get numbers alot and get attention, also began dating a couple people. I wont say all of this success is attributed to weight loss.. But the confidence I gained and exude because of it.

richietherich92 · 2021-09-24T19:23:48+00:00

I'm a shorter guy (5'7") and I used to weigh roughly about 250 lbs about a few months ago. I just recently lost weight and am now down to about 192 lbs and down several pants and shirt sizes.

In terms of game, I didn't hook up with many girls when I was fat because I usually got friendzoned. But I'm a social person so I hooked up once in a blue moon.

However, when I started losing a lot of weight and worked on my fashion, I noticed my results with girls significantly improve. I noticed a lot more girls looking in my direction and doing double takes. When I go talk to them, it's not an immediate rejection, like it used to be. They're actually interested in talking to me and sometimes they do all the work for me.

Along your weight loss journey, you may be tempted to give up because of a multitude of reasons, like you're not seeing progress or it's too hard to maintain your diet. As someone who has been there, it will take time but I promise that it will get better. There's a saying that "Rome wasn't built in one day" and the same applies for weight loss.

You're on the right path man. Keep it up!

strugglingstudent00 · 2021-09-24T19:44:09+00:00

I went from 210 to 185-190 lbs in about a year. Im 5'9 , 21 years old, I have a baby face, and hold fat in my face pretty hard to the point where I needed to get visible abs to lose the double chin. Im not super huge at the gym(I still have made great progress for the year and fill out my clothes very nicely) but after a solid year of 6 days a week in the gym, proper technique, proper diet, and proper sleep patterns my body has changed significantly. Women notice me for my body outside of the gym now and I can see plenty of women doing double takes when Im wearing the proper clothing(fit of the clothes also plays a large role). I hate taking pictures of myself, dating apps and social media in general but Ive gotten lots of compliments from old friends on my body change and people now asking for advice on fitness and diet.

Find a good workout buddy, watch plenty of youtube videos on technique, find good regimens(lifting vault has plenty of free ones that work) and learn about diet and nutrition. If nothing else comes with it you will have more confidence in your body image and you will feel better physically, emotionally and mentally which is a win in my books. I always air on the side of "do something for yourself, not to impress others" because when you do something to impress others and dont get results quickly enough, dont get the responses you were expecting, etc.. It can be a massive blow to your confidence and it will make sticking with weight loss and fitness seem pointless in a sense if your original motivation gets taken away from you.

zsarmstrong · 2021-09-24T19:38:52+00:00

Depends on your personality. I hate to sound cliché with that but it is true. If you are an outgoing and fun person to be around, and you can easily talk and make conversation around women then you are set. In that case, hitting the gym and getting a meal plan in order will skyrocket your chances. If you struggle being socially awkward (me lol) then you also need to work on that.

I had more game when I was fat mostly because I was an outgoing person back then. Even though I lift every day and stay in great shape. I have 0 game because I struggle to talk to pretty much anyone my age.

Either way, you SHOULD hit the gym, and get a meal plan in order. It becomes one of your favorite hobbies when you start seeing results. You also have a lot of opportunity to meet a lot of other people.

1234567d123456 · 2021-09-24T21:23:24+00:00

TBH. Nothing changed for me. I think alot of the game is about confidence and how you dress.

jwilhelm0618 · 2021-09-24T19:35:30+00:00

Idk different people are attracted to different things. I shaved my head and grew a goatee once and noticed a different type of woman was checking me out. As far as with the ladies...I did pretty good at 280 pounds and do pretty good at 200.

IGetBoredSometimes23 · 2021-09-24T22:28:33+00:00

Seems like it's not a problem of your looks if they lose interest after talking to them. Work on your conversation game.

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-09-24T20:50:41+00:00

Post photos. We can give you some style tips or how to carry yourself better.

Simp4Aurelius · 2021-09-25T10:16:54+00:00

Here’s my take as a guy who went from 330lbs to 250lbs and 24% bf at 6’2”. Played football, got big for varsity lineman captain position. Got out of football but still ate like I was playing football and got fat as shit. In college currently, have broad shoulders and have lifted weights for roughly 4-5 years so I have a slightly leaner power lifter body.

After losing 80lbs, I definitely get more second glances, convos where the girl is immediately invested and flirty, and overall initial attraction. Looks do matter.

BUT I know guys who are fat who have better results than me and I think it comes down to facial structure in terms of physical attraction. If you have prominent cheekbones and jawline, you can have quite a bit of extra weight, but if you’re average in the face, your facial features will disappear. It also changes the type of girl you can typically get with. If you have some extra weight, it’ll be relatively easy to get with girls who have some extra weight.

If you want thinner women, you’ll have to put in the work to be thinner yourself typically speaking. A big guy with some sort of status can typically break that boundary, but that, personally speaking, is a lot more difficult and complicated than just losing weight and working on game.

So yes, looks matter, and losing weight will definitely help, but that’s far from the only thing. Game matters and genetically defined physical features matter.

Working on your game, body composition, and overall life (fun, high value, etc.) are well within the realm of your control and should be taken care of.

Maybe nobody will admit it or don’t have experience but being fat doesn’t just burden your dating life, even meeting other friends and dudes is harder. “Skinny privilege” exists, but 99% of people have control over it. Deny it or complain about it if you want, but taking control is the only way to overcome it.

Friendzoning or lack of interest could be your physical appearance or your game so don’t focus on one at the expense of another.

cormacru999 · 2021-09-24T23:10:58+00:00

It probably has much less to do with your appearance & much more to do with your 'game'. With your personality. Most of the women I know (& I have maybe a handful of male friends & we don't talk much, I'm notoriously tough on men) care less about what a guy looks like & care much more about how they act. Of course there are women out there who fixate on appearance but I wouldn't want to date them anyway. I'd bet you're getting denied because of what you say & how you act on those dates.

SkyeStorm1962 · 2021-09-25T00:36:31+00:00

As a girl, I have dated men of All sizes and I really did get along quite well with my fluffier guys more than my smaller ones. Their size didn't matter to me it was how we had connected that had kept me staying but after a while they would lose a little bit of their weight and then walked around the house as if their sh*t don't stink! Major turn off.

I did have one guy who admitted to being big however he was comfortable with himself and made me feel as if I didn't have to walk on eggshells about the weight topic. And I didn't feel as though I had to reassure him for an insecurity. His confidence in knowing what he was and being happy for who he was, was extremely attractive.

The girls who diss you man they are doing you the favor cause if you try to get girls like that you are going to be constantly worried about your weight, looks, styles just to maintain the relationship.

So regardless of your weight I think you just need to look in the right places for the right girl. But if you just want a hit and run. Big Men can still worktheir way around that.

Ray2020K · 2021-09-25T00:59:32+00:00

For men height is much more important than BMI to women.

Yes men with a BMI of 27 are the most attractive to females.

But please be healthy which means a BMI between 17.5 and 25.

Respect

2021-09-25T00:08:34+00:00

It’s obvious. If you’re fat and you lose weight you’ll do better

2021-09-25T00:34:21+00:00

It’s a major difference, a overweight or fat Man will to me look extremely un masculine. Low body fat coupled with muscles looked masculine af. I’d suggest this route but if I had to choose one itd be low body fat. Your face looks better if you have the genetics also sports/weightlifting etc just makes you healthy plus a ass kicking hobby. If you wanna live this life get your ass in shape period

vorter · 2021-09-25T01:44:27+00:00

Conversely, can anyone comment on how it was gaining weight if you were previously skinny?

Adjustedwell · 2021-09-25T03:19:47+00:00

My guy datings apps have way too many variables to attribute failures to get matches to your looks especially if you dont pay for "extra services" etc.

Pic quality, pic variety, decent bio and probably height will matter the most If you're decently good looking.

tes_befil · 2021-09-25T04:23:31+00:00

I went from 300lbs overweight to 190lbs and actively go to the gym. This helped a ton with dating on apps and in person. It definitely isn't everything but it sure helps get you to the point where you meet people easier. If you focus on gym with a good routine and a semi okay diet you'll see massive difference in no time.

winning2323 · 2021-09-25T08:55:21+00:00

"You don't have a second chance to make a good first impression" - Some Wise Guy

A lot more girls/women will find you sexually attractive when you are fit.

Shadow__Account · 2021-09-25T08:59:12+00:00

It will help with getting noticed and you will attract more girls, that being said it’s not going to magically change your behavior that makes you get friendzoned. Don’t expect too much from it, just keep on your path and take the extra bonuses that come with it.

Malimalata · 2021-09-25T10:33:29+00:00

I actually got laid more when I was fat tbh not sure how that one works

NinjaTurtle2077 · 2021-09-25T11:05:34+00:00

It’s more about confidence and personality than your weight but for most people being fat and large is a drain on confidence so when you lose weight your confidence goes up and so does your game

I’ve known really big guys who are smooth and know how to talk to girls despite their weight, they have no problems dating attractive girls.

ShadyDomes · 2021-09-25T11:59:58+00:00

A lot better. Still don't have a girlfriend but im pretty picky. Losing weight and putting on muscle has definitely helped.

anoyingprophet · 2021-09-25T12:46:26+00:00

Once you start attracting women purely from your looks, you'll learn that game is a lie lol. If a girl is attracted to you, she'll think something dumb you said was funny, something corny you said was cute, and will be thinking more about you in her spare time. Just like men, women are finessed by looks. It's a harsh reality. So you'll notice, you won't have to try as hard to charm a woman when she's attracted to you.

FlatDistance5 · 2021-09-25T13:18:38+00:00

I’ll be honest the women here won’t tell you they are attracted to looks they’ll say it’s more of how you carry yourself.

Which is true to an extent.

For me when I go to the gym I feel better and I feel more sociable, so my verbal game is tighter.

But......

Even though I feel better and more sociable my dating life was night and day between 5’11 270 me and 228 me. When I was 228 no change in style multiple dates every week. 270 me cold approaching lots of attraction some numbers no dates. Could be text game could be style but working out and getting fit makes the biggest difference.

ProphetPhilosophic · 2021-09-25T14:56:14+00:00

Growing up fat, I always heard I had a good personality. On top of that, I was fairly social and was always around women so I didn't have much trouble talking to them. I would even say that I was able to attract them through my personality and game.

The result of losing about 100 lbs is that I became more confident and direct resulting in more closings.

CompetitionFair7686 · 2021-09-25T16:51:35+00:00

Upload some pictures of yourself somewhere and post the link here

rickky99 · 2021-10-03T03:01:15+00:00

Lost a lot of weight still don’t get much pussy

LogosKing · 2021-10-07T00:33:03+00:00

Man, tons of ugly, overweight guys get dates, and fuck. I'm not particularly attractive. Some girls rate me an 8, some rate me a 5. I'm sorta chubby. Around 199 pounds. I have about 3-4 solid 9/10 girls literally begging for me to go exclusive with them. The game is about how you walk and how you talk.

Try improving how you look at yourself, and go on a diet. Start going to the gym, and improve your diet. Just diet and exercise will seriously boost your confidence even if you aren't making fast gains, or losing weight quickly.

People fear loss, and want what they cannot have. Simply research tactics used by abusers, and narcissists, and sociopaths. Dread game, and blowing hot and cold, are very simple and very common.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	79
Comments	62
Date	September 24, 2021 6:29 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/pupp7v/deleted_by_user/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1275599 https://theredarchive.com/post/1275599

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