For those who say to ask out 300 women...

OrzhovPalatine · 2020-07-30T03:03:13+00:00

I wish more people were honest about it but cold approaching 100-300 women is more of a warm up exercise rather than an actual good strategy.

You do it because:

gets rid of your approach anxiety
thickens your skin to rejection
allows you to work on calibration

Any dates you get are just a side bonus.

throwhawayyyy · 2020-07-30T02:42:06+00:00

“Do you feel like you had a choice, or do you feel like you just accepted whoever eventually agrees?”

You should only go for women you are attracted to. It’s not like you’re approaching random women who you have no attraction for and “settle” for whoever.

daveinpublic · 2020-07-30T10:39:48+00:00

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RProgrammerMan · 2020-07-30T03:24:19+00:00

I think there is a spectrum, it doesn't have to be one or the other. On one end you have the stranger on the street while the other extreme is the girl you know from your social life that's already been trying to get your attention. You see girls on the street everyday but the likelihood of them saying yes to you is much lower as is the chance they are a good match for you. The girl that already likes you is much more likely to say yes but you might only meet someone like that once a year. Approaching women on the street or in the bar is going to give you a much lower rate of success but it gives you a lot of practice. The rejection also stings less because they don't really know you so there could be a thousand reasons they reject you that have nothing to do with you. So I think it's a matter of figuring out what fits your lifestyle and personality. I think it's important to put the reps in approaching women you don't know as it's the only way you'll have the chance to develop your skills and build your self-confidence.

SundaySermon · 2020-07-30T10:56:19+00:00

Unless you’re as good looking as Chris hemsworth, the odds of you getting a date by just going up to a random girl that doesn’t know you is slim to none. Stop focusing on that.

Play the long game, get to know one that you like then make you’re move. One at the gym? Go up and introduce yourself, small talk, don’t ask to hangout, just be friendly. Next time you see her, walk by and just say hi (name) with a smile and walk away. Next time Make small talk again, see what she likes to do, etc. These interactions should be very brief, let her get back to working out. Once you have a read on her, if she’s interested or not, then make your move.

Ryaan200 · 2020-07-30T13:11:32+00:00

Unless you are the top 10% of males don’t expect much return

STD_Tyler · 2020-07-30T05:26:45+00:00

It is a numbers game. But if your stats suck, you have to change and improve, not keep doing the same shit forever.

Aim for 3-5 dates per 100 approaches. And I am talking about attractive girls, not average girls you feel comfortable approaching.

ZlatanAgrees · 2020-07-30T09:54:58+00:00

No sane person approaches 300 women dude wth. Most dudes i know think 30 is too much lol

rock_and_rave · 2020-07-30T07:41:43+00:00

I've never been about approaching and going for dates and Facebook and # closes, to me a woman doesn't just qualify because she's good-looking enough. I want to see who they are as a person, weed out the negative/immature/narcissistic ones. Then there's girls that you just won't mesh with or have much in common. Or heck, there's a lot of times you'll find out they're legitimately in a relationship.

I think the longer you go down this whole dating scene path, the more you realize you want quality over quantity, and really avoid the pitfalls of wasting your time with any woman that's going to impact your life negatively in the long run. So if you approach with more of an agenda of just seeing if they're a cool chick first, it'll change the vibe and the outcome. You may not find out for sure if she's interested in you like that, but you'll find yourself getting rejected a lot less. Even if they do reject you, they don't really know you, and it could be for any different reason. Maybe they're sick of guys approaching them. Maybe someone else just put them in a bad mood. Anyways, you try not to take it personal, you rewind the tape and think about what you can do better next time, after that disregard everything else. You either succeed in your goals or you learn, as long as you handle it constructively.

In time, what's meant to be will be, and the girls that like your vibe will come back around. Maybe as friends maybe more. But I can tell you, tons of girls appreciate a guy who doesn't pressure them by trying to round the bases asap. That alone makes it worthwhile.

jimmybanana · 2020-07-30T11:58:22+00:00

The amount of time, effort, mental and emotional anguish as well as the hits to your self esteem and confidence chasing 300 women? Fuck, you should redirect all that energy into yourself and building a business, training in the gym, becoming a world-beater.

Get your shit together, get your money right and your crib popping - all of that will build your confidence and self esteem sky high and draw women to you, how the fuck it’s supposed to be!

I get it that it’s tough, and instinctively you want women every day of the week; I’m not saying don’t chase them, just keep checks and balances on your energy and time and ensure the majority is focused on you and your purpose.

Don’t let the rejections and these bratty chicks fuck with your inner sanctum. You battle it by staying on your purpose and building YOU up.

You build your world and your kingdom FIRST and maybe, just maybe, she might be lucky that you’ll invite her in.

perccosmos · 2020-07-30T12:10:10+00:00

Let 300 women approach you

throwdontgo31 · 2020-07-30T12:19:47+00:00

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alias_guy88 · 2020-07-30T12:51:30+00:00

There are two common routes (there's more) but in it's the simplest form. You can cold approach or social circle approach. If you cold approach, you inevitably approach a bunch of women who have a list of endless excuses to not want to go on a date with you or meet you. You are battling the odds, and they are not in your favour. Usually, it's not even personal, but a lot of guys take it personally.

Social circle approach eliminates a lot of this, and ultimately you have greater odds.

I cold approach girls I'm only interested in, and because it's a cold approach it's usually an attitude or a physical thing that I have for them. I find out quickly if she's interested, but I believe rapport building is so important. People say you should quickly chat, get the number then go. Well, I don't think that works from my own experience. Have some banter, make her laugh, and try to create a good first impression. She's more likely to give you a number, and actually stick with it.

throwdontgo31 · 2020-07-30T14:03:04+00:00

Worth it. I don't think I've been rejected 300 times yet, but it's definitely closing in on 100 between rejections and flakes, probably 300 in total I've talked to. The way I see it I've gotten like 6 girls to go out with me who wouldn't have if I didn't take action, probably like 8 instant dates, and extremely valuable experience and confidence with women. I'm working on myself to improve my success rate, but honestly I'm just happy to have been able to have the small amount of success I've gotten and to had my first ltr and hookup.

Celobrix · 2020-07-30T14:54:13+00:00

Hey man, lower your bar of success.

If success for you is getting a woman to agree to a date, or have sex with you and you’re not there yet game-wise your brain will sabotage you and tell you to stop.

If your success is have a positive interaction, or flirt a little bit in each one then your bar is lowered and you’ll get positive reference points each time.

chemmyboi · 2020-07-30T02:49:50+00:00

You have the right idea by approaching only women you actually know and like. Asking strangers out in the street is creepy. I understand how rejection is hard.. I think dating app are a good in between. Go on casual date with match. If it work, good. If it doesn't, you make a potential friend who can introduce you more naturally to some other girls. 👍

huixing_ · 2020-07-30T11:11:37+00:00

Dating shouldn’t be a numbers game, it shouldn’t be a game at all.

Dating is about meeting new people, building relationships, and hopefully finding one meaningful enough to stay in forever.

You’ll never get that kind of connection chasing after anything in your vicinity.

jacksh2t · 2020-07-30T09:46:32+00:00

Isn’t it to get you used to talking to girls, and facing rejection and knowing it’s no big deal? Some guys I know who are still single are sooooo quiet and awkward when they’re out with a cute date.

You don’t wanna have a date with TheOne™️ and you end up being a bumbling fool cos you don’t have enough experience

Fragmented79 · 2020-07-30T09:47:24+00:00

Man that does sound like it’s as hard as Navy Seal training!

MeMafician · 2020-07-30T10:10:54+00:00

I wish i had a answer! All i can say is hope you find peace and love!

Greve_Dracula · 2020-07-30T10:42:16+00:00

The only guarantee in life is death

atomant88 · 2020-07-30T10:54:16+00:00

stop being emotional about it. stop investing so early. ask out girls you dont like. and keep doing it till rejections dont hurt. indeed; being rejected by people you already like IS painful. even for experts. so dont 'practice' on them. practice on strangers till you get your technique down. and try to have some fun along the way

leilacarpenter10 · 2020-07-30T11:00:06+00:00

Give yourself a good chance of getting a yes. That may sound difficult, but play it like roulette or something. You don't bet on the same number ten times when it didn't come in nine times already.

Hortos · 2020-07-30T12:59:55+00:00

You might want to practice on dating apps or something because at least then you’re more likely to get to a one on one interaction without burning your social circle options.

poplookok · 2020-07-30T13:13:01+00:00

the issue with the majority of men is they lack the balls to ask a girl out because they are too afraid to get rejected.

Johnny_Ruble · 2020-07-30T13:35:24+00:00

You’re not alone :) Dating for men is like a job search during a deep recession. Dating for women is like holiday shopping. It’s just the way it is.

mattbrianjess · 2020-07-30T13:51:35+00:00

The ideas is to practice talking to women, which is scary for a lot of men. You aren’t actually going on 300 dates

pratik21jsr · 2020-07-30T14:15:14+00:00

The Reason of cold approching 200 -300 women is to get rid of your anxiety. Even if you get rejected it will help you approch the women you really like without any kind of anxiety.

misterandosan · 2020-07-30T14:18:48+00:00

All the ones I choose never like me back in the same way and it hurts.

What do you mean in "the same way"? You don't even know who they are, and you like them already?! How about you find out if YOU like them. Finding someone attractive means fuck all. It's a superficial and meaningless for a meaningful relationship/connection.

This is just you seeking validation from complete strangers, and you need to change this mentality. Why would a complete stranger even like you? You're literally a random person on the street. Of course they will reject you. But the fun of it, is you will succeed eventually if you keep at it, meet someone you actually like, and you WILL learn something about yourself and get better with women in general. Asking out 300 women is not a legitimate strategy to finding your life partner lmao, but the possibilities are endless.

When you get rejected, ask yourself why. Learn from it and bring it into the next interaction. Keep working on yourself, and improve in small steps. DON'T JUST PRACTICE ON PEOPLE YOU'RE ATTRACTED TO. Things you learn in seduction apply to everyone. Practice on grandmas you meet on the train, your friends, people you meet on a daily basis, etc. If you see someone interesting, strike up a conversation regardless of whether you find them attractive or not.

Regardless. Getting rejected 20 times is better than being at home and being a loser. Keep it up.

pleaselie · 2020-07-30T15:27:39+00:00

I think a lot of guys do a shotgun approach in this situation. The thing is, you do those approachs to become more confident and learn somethings. 1- To become insensitive to rejection. 2- to learn how to not hesitate. 3- to fine tune your radar for attraction level.

A lot of guys don't understand that, if there is no attraction, it doesn't matter what in the world you do or say. You won't get the girl. However, if there is a little bit of attraction let's say... In a scale of 1 to 10... The girl has an atraction level of a 5. Now you can do something and raise her attraction level.

I think a lot of man doesn't understand that. In dating and pick up... Your wishes and your own interest in the girl don't matter. What matters is the girl attraction level to you.

When you learn that, it will become so much easier, you won't spent so much time with girls who don't give a fuck for you. You will go, gauge attraction level and then only invest time if there are signs of attraction.

Doing a lot of this will make you reach a point that you will know in the first 5 or 10 min of conversation if you got a chance or no.

Guy's, don't give up cold approachs, they are hard as fuck, to get anywhere, your game must be tight. However they will help you in other situations as well.

Good luck

2020-07-30T16:41:36+00:00

Why would you approach 300 women

seonj8919 · 2020-07-30T16:52:16+00:00

You need one buddy

Mr_82 · 2020-07-30T17:10:16+00:00

Agreed, and this is why I get tired of hearing people say "keep trying, it's a numbers game" whenever any man vents about not getting dates. There's a related post I saw today, from this sub too I think, (edit: actually I think it's on r/dating maybe) related to this, where I went into more detail about my thoughts on this in a comment.

I just wish people more were more honest about this and things in general; if you're not being totally forthright, you're not being caring either. That's the same reason I find comments about people calling all women, however fat or whatever, "beautiful;" there's merit to consoling someone who's truly self-conscious about whatever, but when it's obvious your attempts to "console" (often it's just virtue-signalling or karma-whoring) are more fake than genuine, that actually has a negative effect.

Mass-Driver · 2020-07-30T17:10:58+00:00

Where the hell are you guys meeting 300 women?

reaprofsouls · 2020-07-30T17:23:13+00:00

The point is to talk to a lot of women. Develop your skills interacting with women.

I am terrible at cold approaching. Far out of University and work a lot. I personally used online dating. All platforms. Went on about 150 first dates over 2-3 years.

I was often dating 2-3 girls a week. If you are a good lay they will stay around. If you are getting laid consistently, the dates can be more easily about connecting and less about getting lucky.

whitecollarpizzaman · 2020-07-30T18:40:41+00:00

As a lot of people are saying, those “ask out x Number of women“ posts are more aimed at getting men over their anxieties and fear of rejection. Most men who are even moderately successful with women don’t go home with someone new every night, but they also don’t let that tear them up. One of the biggest obstacles for many guys is the inability to “get back up“ after being shot down.

GlobalArachnid · 2020-07-31T19:06:39+00:00

I cold approached 200 young women that I think looked 18-22 from late 2016 to late 2018 and got no dates. I still think cold approaching was worth it. Why, well, I'll explain.

Picking up chicks with the intention of only getting laid didn't work out. I did that for the first 78 approaches. All chicks I approached with the intention of getting laid were uncomfortable. Most hunched up and turned their bodies away from me a bit and nervously laughed all throughout. Two told me to fuck off and stop hitting on them. One hit me with her handbag. Another called me a retarded dickhead.

From the 79th approach onward, I only talked to chicks just to talk to them. When I gave up trying to get laid with them, they talked to me. They didn't turn their shoulders away from me. They stopped doing that nervous, spaced-out fake laugh at my dumbass jokes. If I were especially attracted to them, I'd ask for their number. If not, I'd leave them alone. A lot of girls told me they were under eighteen whenever I asked for their number. Whether they were telling the truth about their age who knows. They only said stuff like that whenever I asked for their number, though. Never in the middle of a conversation.

When I got to my 174th approach, I told myself I would stop at approach 200. I kept that promise and haven't approached since. I saw two cute girls with phat asses on the way back to my car from approach number 200 and didn't approach them because, well, I'm a man of my word.

For reference, I'm a 6'2 white guy with an average face in Australia. I approached from ages 20-22. Not ugly, but no attractive, edgy, masculine features like a strong jaw or hunter eyes. I wore thick-rimmed Ray-Ban glasses for 3/4 of my approaches and contacts for the other 1/4. I wear Aussie surfer-type shit like this during summer and more urban/hip-pop type shit like this during winter.

GlobalArachnid · 2020-07-30T13:17:39+00:00

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2020-07-30T18:12:26+00:00

wtf, just give up dude.

diztiinct · 2020-07-30T13:26:37+00:00

Approaching 300 women as warm up. OK mate lmfao that sounds pathetic tbh and it only conceals failure

oodieboodie · 2020-07-30T20:06:42+00:00

The same happens when applying for a job. Back in the day, I would get 100-200 apps. Only 20 were if good use. Or the best. Only 10 would call back. Only 3 would show up for the interview. All to choose 1 good candidate. It took time weeding out what I was looking for when filling a position. I can feel what you must be going through. But I agree, it's good to practice. Get better at conversation and knowing what you want and don't want. Have fun. Opposites are fun too. I married one and still married happy ever after.

Title	For those who say to ask out 300 women...
Author	throwdontgo31
Upvotes	198
Comments	127
Date	July 30, 2020 2:33 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/i0e1x0/for_those_who_say_to_ask_out_300_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/for-those-who-say-to-ask-out-300-women.1499555 https://theredarchive.com/post/1499555

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