Do all relationships go the same way before divorce

xadmin1 · 2024-04-24T09:32:48+00:00

It’s because all 3 of you married bpd women. That’s why their behaviors are predictable. They all share the same playbook.

fishingforthought · 2024-04-22T10:41:39+00:00

Everything you describe is all the weapons that can be used to get what the spouse wants without going to jail. It’s also used in commented relationships.

How come it’s not when you are just dating in the beginning?

dday_throwaway3 · 2024-04-22T10:10:25+00:00

It's a common experience because men aren't educated about female nature. Most men think men and women are the same except we have different plumbing, which isn't true. We have very different goals and we think differently. I recommend getting familiar with evolutionary psychology and biology, starting with David Buss' "The Evolution of Desire".

wisstinks4 · 2024-04-22T03:27:29+00:00

No. It could have some variation of this scenario. Women lose their minds as their marriages end. They feel like a failure in the relationship. Then take it out on the stbxh, it’s wacky shit. However, if they cheated, you become invisible like you never existed. More crazy shit.

Moral: dont get married, dont get divorced. Be safe.

Chris_Chilled · 2024-04-22T02:05:43+00:00

We were sleeping in separate rooms for over 2 years

DivorceRecoveryMen · 2024-04-21T23:57:35+00:00

Mine was communication..... most of my friends too. So common. So, I learned to be a better communicator. Took classes, asked coworkers for help with it and worked on myself to be a better communicator. It actually works when you work at it. Definitely a positive way to heal too.

demeve · 2024-04-21T23:42:28+00:00

I asked my cousin what she and her husband do when they wake up? They greet each other, say good morning, wish each other a nice day. I guess I missed all of that in the past 3 years

Joocewayne · 2024-04-21T23:24:44+00:00

There are a few reoccurring patterns of actual behaviors and choices that do tend to show up, over and over again. Not just the emotional interpretations. Women who want a divorce tend to make similar choices in the end and men who want to stay married respond similarly.

The language women use to describe their actions, justification for them and the words and judgments they attach to the husbands they are leaving are all eerily similar to each other.

The broken husband’s posts on here all sound like different versions of the same guy… some more attached and in denial, some further along as the denial blinders slowly fall off and they wake up.

FuriousSasquatch · 2024-04-21T22:37:40+00:00

It's interesting how similar things are viewed. A lot of guys on here and IRL share similar stories and I bet if you were privy to the female side of those same divorces their stories would be fairly similar as well. I guess a lot of it is perception and just the nature of differences between the sexes and how things are viewed. I would venture a guess if ever the complete truth was known and reviewed by someone or a panel from outside the marriage it would be somewhere in between the "he said, she said" usual sides of things.

The blindsided thing is pretty much standard for a lot of us men. For me at least I just figured things were OK enough and if there was major issues on her end my wife would let me know and we could at least attempt to correct them. We'll, that's not how it went and I see a huge amount of dudes saying the exact same thing. Turn it over to the females view and it's " well I had been saying this, or hinting to that, or acting like this because of that". It's like damn. Just be straight forward and I think a lot of guys would try to move heaven and earth to make things work.

So ya, jaded, bitter, scorned whatever. A lot of us weren't given any real chance to repair or fix anything. Instead just discarded at the woman's convenience.

Keep your head up kings.

Classic_Dill · 2024-04-21T21:25:14+00:00

You’ll find out as you would listen more and ask questions, that there’s only really two or three reasons to get divorced, everything else is a side effect of those, so you’re going to hear the same stories over and over and over again. This is good news, because there’s a pattern, we can correct that in the future, and we can identify it and either take care of the problem or walk away from the relationship, but be prepared to be called jaded, angry, not over your marriage, all kinds of awful things, when you have experience, and you know to cut things short and walk away, you’re called all kinds of names by people. All of them are the same people that have never gone through divorce, and never gone through the trauma of it, we’re all probably a little jaded or better yet, a little guarded now, use the experience after divorce to never get yourself in tht position you are ever again, you can’t always guarantee a relationship will work out, but you can now guarantee that you can walk away, sooner than later, and save yourself the trauma and precious time. I have a TikTok channel if anybody is interested, it’s called “dating after divorce”. I try to include everything that I’ve learned since my divorce and everything that I’m learning day by day, I hope it’s useful for whoever is going through this.

CrazySanta7 · 2024-04-21T19:56:24+00:00

Watch 'The Marriage Wheel' by Coach Greg Adams on youtube and see how it stacks up against your experience.

Title	Do all relationships go the same way before divorce
Author	Squidgy68
Upvotes	25
Comments	36
Date	April 21, 2024 7:42 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1c9qosy/do_all_relationships_go_the_same_way_before/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/do-all-relationships-go-the-same-way-before.1515928 https://theredarchive.com/post/1515928

Comments