How do I stop being a pu**y?

One-Hedgehog4722 · 2024-09-04T15:37:11+00:00

Crawl, walk, run. We arent born being able to run, there are stages. Start by crawling, could be asking a random question like directions etc or making a random comment, nice shoes etc whatever, think about all the times youve done things like this to random people you felt nothing for and start doing it to women you are attracted towards and learn to do it without expectations, like getting her number or whatever, that comes later, or you can go ahead and start trying for that and dealing with rejections, will speed up the process by skipping steps.

appolonysian · 2024-09-04T15:58:30+00:00

Only allow positive self talk - borderline narcissistic positivity is more useful to you than “realistic” objectivism or pessimism. Be retarded confident and don’t let rejection change that.

You learn through exposure, and rejection is inevitable in the game, especially in the learning phase. Theory and reading will only take you so far - you have to go out and make it happen.

Think of some basic openers that will work on women who fit X criteria (for instance, if they’re wearing a certain article or color of clothing) then spam that and practice building a unique script off it.

Don’t go into it expecting or even aiming for a number or date. Break the process down into steps and only focus on breaking through the barrier currently giving you trouble.

garlopf · 2024-09-04T15:59:52+00:00

Shortest answer: do difficult uncomfortable stuff on purpose until it becomes a habit.

Hazekillre · 2024-09-04T16:03:42+00:00

Stop precieving pussy as being weak. Pussies can take a beating.

nobodyknows4real · 2024-09-04T17:01:52+00:00

Keeping your balls full will help awaken a deep desire to procreate. Use that to approach any girl you're attracted to

amlextex · 2024-09-04T15:36:06+00:00

Don't be afraid to choke on your words.

DaygameCode · 2024-09-04T17:46:10+00:00

I’m a pickup/seduction coach let me help you here: Someone said women are human beings, but that’s not really the point. The issue you have is that rejection hurts, to some more than others.

If a person has traumas or deep insecurities or feels inadequate, the rejection hurts even more.

And it’s not as simple as saying “_the worst she can say it’s no_”, because for one that is not true as there are indeed worst things a woman can do or say, than getting told no. Those who have gotten rejected many times know from experience that some women can many times be extremely cruel when they reject a guy.

And secondly, even if women said just no politely, that can still make the guys feel like a failure because the problem is not so much how the woman rejects them, but rather the negative internal dialogue going through their head.

The man will question himself, he will consider that maybe he is just too ugly, he will think maybe he isn’t worthy of women, and since he has been rejected many times with no successes he will think that this is yet another proof that he is undesirable and that trying again is unlikely to change his results because he assumes there is something completely unlikeable about him that causes this constant rejections over and over.

This requires self-work on your inner game. It requires to practice self-compassion, self-acceptance, learning how to manage anxiety, learning how to manage rejection, improving your actual pick up skills and learning what women actually want psychologically speaking, (which you can learn here) so that you understand that your bad results happened because of mistakes that you were not even aware of, and not because you are inadequate or undesirable.

Once you understand, how wrong your mindset about women, worthiness and pick up dynamics was without even realising and how underdeveloped your social skills to handle pressure and challenging social situations with women are, you will manage to overcome your fear of rejection and approach without anxiety and ego holding you back.

WiiWynn · 2024-09-04T15:55:42+00:00

Get some experience. Don’t walk up to women you’re attracted to just yet. Start with ones you’re not. Then when those interactions are good (whatever you’re considering as good eg numbers, dates set up, whatever), start moving up to more attractive women. Eventually you’ll have no issue walking up to any women.

I’ve seen some broke heavy set guys have no issue walking up to 8&9s. They’ve got a hilarious personality and so their chat game is on point.

dodalou · 2024-09-04T16:12:30+00:00

Just think… you’ll always be the same person until you conquer this fear. Even when you’re 90. You’ll still Be the same person you are because you never elected to conquer your fear.

You got this.

tilldeathdoiparty · 2024-09-04T19:37:48+00:00

Stop setting this up as a goal, it becomes work and a pass fail mentality….. go and say hi, to everyone for a week, then say good afternoon, then ask about their day, then ask for their name, then ask for number.

Master each step prior to advancing to the next and do this process every time and it will be natural.

Get confident approaching anyone at any time

Perfect-Highway-6818 · 2024-09-04T15:33:11+00:00

Start small take baby steps. Everyday go out and ask five people for the time. Maybe later on start specifically only asking hot girls for the time. This will get you used to talking to them. They aren’t goddesses who will bring their wrath upon you for dare thinking to speak to them.

Acceptable-Rub4590 · 2024-09-04T18:51:49+00:00

The trick is to not give a fuck and talk to everyone

ProphetRI · 2024-09-04T20:45:18+00:00

The biggest thing I found is always try and give off good energy. Don't let them feel your anxiousness or nervousness as much as you can. Smile like you have no worries in life.

I used to be a pussy. In fact, I still am. Although I am successful with women. Just try and keep the mindset "I'm the fucken best, absolute Chad". Until you start to believe it. Little by little you will. Positive thoughts affect how you compose yourself. As for what I say, if it's out in the wild like in a grocery store I'll usually find something I like about the girl such as their clothes, bracelet, hair pin, etc. Pretend I just noticed them and say "oh I like that (blank)". They'll just say thanks, then you can go on by asking "where she got it, why she's wearing it, doesn't matter. Just get the ball rolling and take any info she gives you and try to continue the convo.

You have to learn to read body language. Always hold eye contact. Especially when she's talking. Glance at her lips too. Subtle way of letting her know you're attracted via body language. If it's at the bar, my go to is "what brings you out tonight"? Can lead to so many different convo paths. Good luck. You're the fucken best.

srwat · 2024-09-04T15:43:08+00:00

Affirmations, subliminals, cold approaching, making a mistakes journal, looking through the many gems in this sub and not letting your emotions get distorted.

Look at every experience as a chance to learn, not a chance to beat yourself up. Don’t worry about the “finish line”

Disastrous_Catch6093 · 2024-09-04T16:14:35+00:00

U gotta rip the bandaid . My first approaches suck so far lol . The sooner you get to it the sooner you’ll improve .

epimpstyle · 2024-09-04T18:15:25+00:00

I don't know what to say

Just make up a story, it does not have to be real, use your improvisation to say something, but no compliment dude, it is so creepy, you have no idea what it looks like when a guy appears out of nowhere and compliments a girl walking down the street "I like your style/t-shirt/hat/hair" but she didn't put any effort to look good but you start with a compliment - it is so fake and forced, it is hard to explain. Leave the compliments for the night game, but get creative with the day game.

What do you say in Daygame? In short just use a good opener that leaves room for conversation, for example: "Hey, two seconds, is the XYZ street that way?" now depends on what she says: [her reply: yes] " cool because there is a XYZ bar/restaurant, they have great pizza/ice cream/limonade, I came from ABC area of town just for that... where are you from?" [her answer XYZ] Now use your improvisation: "Oh no way! I have a friend who went to XYZ and he told me.... [insert a funny story].

What happens if after your first question she says "I don't know", the easiest answer is "I guess you're not from here, where are you from? Now, after she tells you XYZ... you can start the same story again with your friend who was in XYZ and ..... [made up a funny story].

Just be a bit clever and and everything will be easier for you.... Is hard only in the beginning for 20-30 seconds until you give them a topic to talk about.... then everything becomes easier.

Fit_Dot_7503 · 2024-09-05T21:57:44+00:00

Dog. You need to hit the gym hard, learn how to fight and no girl will ever again make you shy

iROLL24s · 2024-09-05T22:18:28+00:00

Take risks. That’s all. Win or lose, you’ll respect yourself more and be happier because of it.

Shot_Following_1679 · 2024-09-06T02:44:33+00:00

You gotta just do it. I had this problem.

Work on breathing, get that anxiety feeling out of your head. Just ask them hows it going..

lazzoe · 2024-09-07T10:27:54+00:00

We were all there once brova man. You just need to hang out with dudes who are alpha and tough. They'll rub that toughness on you and that's one way you can be confident

ak4790 · 2024-09-08T08:53:19+00:00

Look at life like a video game. You're playing a character in 1st person. Go up to girls and just say whatever. Doesn't matter if they like u or not. Even if u stumble and choke. Just the action alone will gain u more xp, and make u more confident over time.

timjohnbrad11 · 2024-09-08T10:56:54+00:00

Realise they’re humans too and it doesn’t matter if you say something stupid (though it’ll haunt you forever). We all find it awkward talking to strangers but if you want to be successful in any regard you need to learn.

WolfOfUmea · 2024-09-08T21:34:17+00:00

Honestly bro from my experience it never gets not scary. But the talking part is kinda easy, you could basically talk about anything. Really anything. The hardest thing is approaching.

Kakashi_1000_jutsu · 2024-09-04T17:00:55+00:00

In all my experience, I've noticed one thing that I'd like to share with you. SHE'S NOT AN ALIEN. Just go talk to her like you would talk to a random guy. Don't think about flirting or getting a date just yet. Just start talking to her as if she's a normal person, she will keep the conversation going if she's interested. Once you're comfortable, you could start with light flirting and see how it goes. They're just normal human beings like us.

BravoPUA · 2024-09-04T17:18:59+00:00

This is what helped me.

https://thebravohood.com/how-i-got-over-my-approach-anxiety

Ancient-Position-696 · 2024-09-04T18:06:56+00:00

Be a dick

MouseAware809 · 2024-09-04T20:46:17+00:00

You walk around with a dildo strapped to your head until you no longer fear public humiliation.

Source: Collection of Confidence - exercise 5.

Yes I did it, the world didn't end.

VozSuave · 2024-09-05T03:03:50+00:00

You give yourself permission to be you all the time and be unapologetic.

Brave_Scholar_3849 · 2024-09-05T10:26:36+00:00

here's an idea go get rejected first a few times like voluntarily, if she says yes abort mission

InsecureWasianBoy · 2024-09-05T06:35:42+00:00

Girls will aggressively chase hot guys at a young age and these guys develop unwavering swag and confidence and low inhibition.

Good_Writing_4134 · 2024-09-05T21:13:27+00:00

Go out with a goal in mind and keep it achievable.

Ex: I will push myself to talk to girls until I get rejected 50 times.

This frames it in a way that takes pressure off you. And each time it doesn’t work out the sting is buffered by the knowledge you’re working successfully toward your goal.

Just make sure you continue to be the nice person that you are while doing this. Simply by doing something like this you will become more comfortable around women, less afraid of rejection, and will probably start to recognize the things you have that do work for you.

Practical_Window_919 · 2024-09-04T19:27:31+00:00

First of all, stop calling yourself a pussy. If you talk down to yourself, why should anyone else do it differently?

Witty_Paramedic_1305 · 2024-09-04T20:36:53+00:00

To stop being «putty» in other people’s hands, meaning to stop being easily manipulated or overly accommodating, try these approaches:

Establish Boundaries: Clearly define and communicate what you are willing to accept. Stand firm in these boundaries to avoid being shaped by others’ demands.
Develop Assertiveness: Practice expressing your needs and opinions confidently. This helps ensure you’re not easily swayed or molded by others.
Recognize Your Value: Understand and appreciate your own worth. When you value yourself, you’re less likely to be easily influenced or pushed around.
Be Decisive: Make decisions based on your own needs and priorities rather than just going along with what others want.
Practice Self-Care: Ensure you take time for yourself and prioritize your own well-being. This can help you maintain your sense of self rather than becoming flexible to others’ whims.

kind_narsist_0069 · 2024-09-04T18:39:18+00:00

Dont go after the most sought after ones..go for the ones who look normal but have big character or seem independent and open for discussion..Ask them regular open ended questions..

HeresAGrainOfSalt · 2024-09-04T19:08:58+00:00

Fuck bitches and get money or bother them for cigarettes and beers.

rzerx · 2024-09-04T19:09:01+00:00

Inner game problem. Work on your cobudence

ConfidentMongoose874 · 2024-09-04T19:32:59+00:00

I'm sure Tony Hawk fell flat on his face at some point, starting out.

The-Royal-Fork · 2024-09-04T20:43:41+00:00

Lol nobody asked for your age. Wtf.

Which decade are you in? 20’s? 30’s?

pepskino · 2024-09-04T21:00:05+00:00

Don Julio ..

GiotaroKugio · 2024-09-04T22:29:03+00:00

Get drunk, realize that nothing bad happens and approach freely onwards without needing alcohol. Go out with friends let them approach a group , join the conversation and try to pull a girl

btown007 · 2024-09-04T23:14:39+00:00

Take the pressure off the situation and just have a conversation. Let what happens happen.

Poolside_XO · 2024-09-05T00:44:50+00:00

Step 1: Stop calling yourself a pu$$y.

The mindset is the first thing you must change, and that requires you to look at yourself differently.

So what if you didn't approach So what if you choked So what if she thought you were weird

Those are all platitudes that are outside of yourself. No wonder we're always worried.

Also, stop taking advice from other people and just do what comes to mind. You'll figure out the steps without redditors critiquing your every move.

Once you get a baseline for how you operate, THEN bring in the gurus to learn advanced stuff.

Sciguy314 · 2024-09-05T00:53:57+00:00

Be ok with fucking up…. Really this works with anything, and you get unlimited do overs usually

zeen516 · 2024-09-05T02:02:31+00:00

I think they have operations for that type of thing

Distinct_Bluebird_93 · 2024-09-05T07:14:55+00:00

5 ways to approach a girl you like https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHKdq3t1QoA

BaronSaber · 2024-09-05T08:36:44+00:00

Either type “pussy” or don’t use the word. Start there.

Commercial-Ruin2320 · 2024-09-05T15:46:25+00:00

They're just people, talk to them like you would the guys and you'll have a great time

ProcedureLogical3165 · 2024-09-05T16:57:51+00:00

Dont depend on others. Talk when necessary and when you talk, be polite, Clear and brief. Do the necessary things asap and dont let it wait for a second. Make money and save it. Be a gentle man when u go out with people. It could be friends family or a date. Spend yours and theirs too. Study and keep great mannerisms.

Mr_Einsteiin · 2024-09-05T17:06:30+00:00

“Hey beautiful I’m (John), what’s your name? Or can I just call you mine?”

Huge_Shower_1756 · 2024-09-05T18:55:32+00:00

What makes you a pussy is that you believe you're a pussy. You'd probably have much more success with women, even if you didn't approach if you simply dropped this belief that you were a pussy and raised your self esteem. Then you can try to learn to approach coming from that place instead of coming from the place of trying to stop being a pussy which will never work.

GWARY54 · 2024-09-05T20:05:57+00:00

Find a place, area, or activity that you feel confident then approach, say hi

Title	How do I stop being a pu**y?
Author	TTV_QiyanuReeves
Upvotes	163
Comments	61
Date	September 4, 2024 3:23 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1f8w3eh/how_do_i_stop_being_a_puy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-stop-being-a-puy.1529377 https://theredarchive.com/post/1529377

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