I think my wife is prepping to divorce me. Help me prepare.

berzerker5000 · 2024-10-23T19:46:58+00:00

Weed if legal in the state won’t matter but temporary orders will say neither party can be intoxicated during custody so if she smells it on you when you pick up kids she could fuck with you.

The best defense is offfensive surprise attack. Call all the best lawyers in town to setup consultations to cock block her from getting them. Legally if you so much as contact them, they can’t represent her. File first. Main other thing is to protect your cash and assets. Get everything out of the joint account. My exw did me dirty and drained the checking account right before she told me she filed. Well played.

fffrdcrrf · 2024-10-23T16:39:45+00:00

So I would say weed just like alcohol is not something you can be intoxicated by and still be responsible for the care of a child. That’s legally speaking, so if she can prove to a judge that you’re high all the time even around the child the judge will probably want the sober person to be the guardian and if its bad enough maybe even require supervised visits or some kind of substance abuse treatment.

I don’t know your habits, but if you’re worried about it then don’t do it in front of her and especially your child. Maybe take a break or have appropriate times when no one is around.

dudefromyork · 2024-10-23T15:25:34+00:00

Get to a lawyer right away. Not tomorrow (I used to smoke weed, seriously dude do it today and don’t put it off. You need to get out and do this before you take another hit!!). Most will give you a free initial consultation. I’d try and see 3 and pick the one that gets you most.

Start doing stuff with your kid and posting it all over social media. Parks. Museums. Anything you can think of. This is a media blitz. Everyone needs to see you being a great dad.

And probably cut the weed out. Firstly it’s not a good look. And secondly you’re going to need all of your motivation and energy to get through this. Weed takes away both those things.

Lastly - hit a gym. Lift. Run. Row. Go to HIT classes. It won’t help with the specifics of the divorce but you will feel a whole lot better!

PghSubie · 2024-10-23T14:54:31+00:00

What is she asking you to start doing or quit doing? You're still together and you have a small kid. At a minimum, you'll be co-parenting for a decade. The time to build a healthy relationship is now. Take steps to make ahead the playing field is even. If she doesn't have a job, make it clear that she should start taking steps to get one. Make sure you're equally participating in childcare duties

Pro-IDGAF · 2024-10-23T13:05:06+00:00

i hope you dont have any firearms in the house. she could turn that against you, with the weed thing.

rsmiley77 · 2024-10-23T12:45:29+00:00

There’s some bad advice that I’ve seen from n this thread. Do not put anything in cars to track her movement and also don’t put in small hidden cameras unless she knows where they are.

Things you can do now:

1- divide all finances. Put your money into your own account and then you both can contribute to monthly bills.

2- you can put in cameras in your home to record things. Just make sure she knows about them and they’re in public areas.

3- start thinking about how your future will look. Can you make changes now that will help you in the future with custody?

4- double check your CCs to make sure she is not on any of them. Don’t want her pulling out a lot of money in your name.

Efficient-Mango7708 · 2024-10-23T12:12:48+00:00

Sounds like it could be postpartum depression. Does she have a good support network? Has she seen a therapist for this? Is she taking any medication? Have you gone to counseling? If the answer is yes and it’s been over 6 months or a year then prep like this guy GreyTooFast says. Otherwise put in the effort to help your kids mother even if she may not be your wife in the near future.

Sea_Emu_4259 · 2024-10-23T12:07:18+00:00

* Stay in house

* Resilience building: lift+cardio+therapist

* Other general advices: car tracker, asset protection....

Exactly65536 · 2024-10-23T09:01:10+00:00

Consider this scenario: she gets really super angry, takes all the money out of shared account and disappears with the intention to only ever see you in court. Do you have a stash somewhere to pay the fees? Lawyer, court, whatever are the costs where you live.

If you can, stop smoking, drinking. A lawyer can give you a legal advice on what's the leverage that your wife will get from it, but also - alcohol makes you depressed and angry, weed makes you dumb and docile. Both are not ideal in a prolonged fight. You need to be alert, focused, and able to think clearly.

DaveTheDrummer802 · 2024-10-23T08:55:02+00:00

Save money. Not in a bank.

VariousScallion8597 · 2024-10-23T08:13:02+00:00

Stop smoking weed. Post it on social for evidence and document every milestone. One week one month etc

Weed is legal but why would you give her ammunition?

modernmanagement · 2024-10-23T03:29:18+00:00

For the sake of your son and your own wellbeing, it is best to try and finish things amicably and aim for 50/50 arrangement and do as much as you can privately without involving lawyers, if possible. Certainly go and get legal advice, just don't want to be fighting it out in court if you can avoid it. Be gracious and flexible and understanding to reach that conclusion. Aim to become awesome co parents and don't put it onto the kids, they can't deal with adult drama.

GreyTooFast · 2024-10-23T03:07:14+00:00

Put small hidden micro USB charger cameras in common areas of your home. Only argue in front of them. They are motion activated and will record any arguments so she cannot claim domestic violence
Move over 1/2 your money to separate bank account with only your name on it
Turn on google timeline tracking on your phone. It will record all movement so she cannot say you are somewhere you werent supposed to be
If you can ammicably do the divorce without mediation & court, do it. If not, strap in and start protecting yourself.
If you can rent an apartment, move there with your son.

NotUsedUsernameYet · 2024-10-23T03:00:42+00:00

Make sure you are equally involved or more involved parent of your child.
Make sure she works, ideally making same as you or more.
Avoid anything that can be interpreted as risky behavior or violence.

Title	I think my wife is prepping to divorce me. Help me prepare.
Author	Hot_Candidate6781
Upvotes	10
Comments	33
Date	October 23, 2024 2:41 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1ga05st/i_think_my_wife_is_prepping_to_divorce_me_help_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/i-think-my-wife-is-prepping-to-divorce-me-help-me.1532740 https://theredarchive.com/post/1532740

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