Why is it always "maybe" with girls.

eablokker · 2026-06-06T05:55:56+00:00

Hey do you want to watch this movie? Not gonna tell you the title of it, you can't see the cover art. I won't tell you what its about, nor the genre. I won't tell you if anybody recommends it, nor what ratings it has. It's just a completely random movie.

Of course you're going to say "maybe"! You don't have enough information yet.

What if it turns out to be a good movie? Then you'd wished you'd have watched it. Watch if it turns out to be a terrible movie? Then it would have been a waste of your time. You need at least a little bit information to go on. Is it highly recommended? Is there a preview you can watch? A brief synopsis? Something to get you in the mood to get interested in watching it?

Maybe if you happen to be in an adventurous mood you'd be like fuck it, I'll grab a random movie out of a bin and watch it blind. But how often does that happen?

Women cannot decide if they like you based solely on what you look like and the same boring-ass small talk that everyone else uses. There's no way. They have to have something more to go on.

Voljinzzz · 2026-06-06T05:28:24+00:00

you failed to transition smoothly.

HomelessMilkman · 2026-06-06T11:29:39+00:00

Why is it never a clear yes or no. ?

Your sense of 'value' isn't clear and obvious. If you're clearly confident, outgoing, expressive, uncompromisingly fun and positive, have a commanding presence, etc. you'll get a very clearly defined "yes". You're exhibiting clear 'high status' behaviour.

Most guys are so passive, it's hard to delineate what 'confidence' they have. You have to poke them with a stick to do something, say something, get them involved in some way to see how they handle social pressure. It's not volunteered, it's not proactive, you're given very little to go on. Hence, 'maybe', mixed reactions, tests, etc. The real disinterest is being neutral and apathetic to your existence.

If you proactively engage her friends, if you lead, if you put yourself out there loudly and proudly, she won't feel the need to provide trials to 'test your might'. Although, saying that, if you say something like "I don't dance", will she stop and respect your boundaries or are you immediately being dragged to the dance floor? They're conditioned to 'expose weakness' at all costs, they want to see the giant fall to his knees. He won't compromise, all mentions of weaknesses are actually my strength, and she's walking herself into the lions' den - she's going out of her way to conjure Jamiroquai of all people to a dance battle.

DrBarackPendergrass · 2026-06-06T11:46:22+00:00

Dating Coach here — If every woman in the world wanted to fuck you and some average looking woman with an average personality approached you and said that she *also* wanted to fuck you, you’d tell her to “Join The Club” and get in line by repeatedly saying “Maybe” too.

ethicalhooping · 2026-06-06T05:16:05+00:00

maybe means no

Xero_Darknezz · 2026-06-06T06:53:30+00:00

That makes it boring and that the biggest killer of attraction. The will they won't they dynamic is what women dream about when they read romantic novels and is big part of maintaining sexual tension. Without it you are no longer a mystery and the girl will write you off as sure thing. It's all just part of the game and like it or not it's important to understand how to play it.

OpinionThink481 · 2026-06-06T18:22:41+00:00

- Why is it never a clear yes or no?

For 3 main reasons.

1 - Cuz sex requires buildup of tension and anticipation for it to feel very good. Sex without tension buildup is like drinking a soda can that was open 24 hours ago instead of immediately after opening it or like watching a movie's end without seeing how the story unfolded before it got to the end. It's just not the same.

2 - Because women invest emotionally way more when having sex than guys. Her safety, her comfort level and trusting a guy who is much more stronger and thus potentially dangerous, takes time. You could be a rapist, you could be a kidnapper, you could be the type of guy who gets aggressive if she says no to something he wants or if she changes her mind about something she promised. So trusting a guy who hits on them is not something they can afford to do by default if they are intelligent people and have survival instincts.

3- Because women are heavily judged for being "easy", promiscuous or slutty", and wanting sex immediately would risk being labeled as a slut which is something women are afraid of. A woman needs to feel like she was seduced into it, rather than feeling like she was asking for it in order to save face and feel good with herself.

And lastly, another reason could be that the women you meet are not that attracted to you from the start, but that's probably a bit less likely than the other 3 reasons i just mentioned before.

SicParvisMagnaaa · 2026-06-06T16:05:48+00:00

You probably aren't attractive enough. A lot of people are gonna dance around saying this but yeah, if you want women to give you super strong signals and not ambiguity you have to clear a certain bar. People think attraction is a binary on/off switch but it's more like a spectrum with thresholds that unlock different things.

Check in on your physical shape, skin health, etc. and see what you can do. Changing things upstream generally has more compounding effects than downstream stuff like your moment to moment behavior.

stick_it_in_your_bum · 2026-06-06T05:36:42+00:00

They’re using you for attention.

Low-Drawer3883 · 2026-06-06T06:45:07+00:00

Because plausible deniability is how you flirt with the girlypops, either that or she's letting you down gently

Matter_Still · 2026-06-06T07:08:28+00:00

It is a clear "yes" or "no" if you've taken the time to build the right foundation. The problem is, for guys like you who know immediately that you want girls to know as suddenly.

Aside from that, I don't even know how that conversation starts. What do you do? Ask her where she stands at a certain point?

merchant_of_mirrors · 2026-06-06T07:20:20+00:00

Women aren't like men when it comes to sexuality. They are far more selective than we are about who they get sexual with, and it often doesn't take much for them to disqualify you, even if they find you physically attractive. Sometimes it can be a yes one day and a no the next, it's very emotion dependent for them. Women are generally only clearly yes or no consistently if their interest in you is very high.

norwegiandoggo · 2026-06-06T16:27:07+00:00

It is a clear yes if they like you and trust you enough.

If it's not a clear yes or no - they don't like you enough or don't trust you enough. It is typical the case that a beginner seducer gets women interested. But he fails to convert to sex because he gives off too much fake player vibes and therefore he struggles to build the necessary trust for her to have sex.

If she can't trust you, she's not gonna sleep with you.

NON-Ballcoach201 · 2026-06-06T21:13:40+00:00

Assume that maybe is a no and you’ll never be disappointed.

O_Pacity · 2026-06-07T05:31:11+00:00

if its not a yes, thr its a no

United-Implement-382 · 2026-06-06T05:44:40+00:00

You keep running into the wrong women. It’s either a “Hell Yes” or a “No”. You just have to put yourself out there and talk to more women.

Captain-Comment · 2026-06-06T06:02:21+00:00

Possibly just slut deflection. They maybe don't want to seem to eager or easy and don't want to come off looking like a slut.

S-Tier_Commenter · 2026-06-06T06:38:51+00:00

Cause you don't gotta carry nothing for 9 months.

alejoflo11 · 2026-06-06T05:18:57+00:00

Las mujeres son indirectas. Las mujeres quieren emociones fuertes, divertirse, si tu se los das y eres un hombre atractivo, se van acostar contigo, si no, no lo harán. Es muy facil

Worried-Ad-5443 · 2026-06-06T05:33:39+00:00

You’re supposed to “just get it”

BurnItDownSR · 2026-06-06T07:36:25+00:00

Because women care more about status and personality than looks.

Easier to pretend you're somebody than it is to change your face and the shape of your body.

If you want your interactions to be less shaky then address your behaviors the same way women address their bodies.

They diet and work out to develop bodies that guys will be less doubtful of.

You should also train yourself to stop making cringey mistakes and to be more smooth.

That was the original point of Seduction. It isn't supposed to be what it is nowadays where it's mostly men playing it safe and making excuses for their failures, it's supposed to be different methods to develop your social and flirting skills.

Oh so many conflicting and different methods? Welcome to the real world. The exact same is true for Fitness. Anyone who has tried to figure out the gym has also come upon tons of conflicting advice from different sources, you have people saying high volume, lower intensity is the key to muscle and you also have people saying low volume, high intensity is the key to muscle.

Don't listen to the dummies who pretend their stupid "CoNfLiCtInG aDvIcE" criticism is profound.

Just do the damn work like you would for any other area you want to develop.

Do the work to look through multiple different resources on dating advice and pick one you vibe with well.

Do the work to thoroughly test the advice. And thoroughly is not a handful of interactions. 30 interactions is the bare minimum. You easily go through 30 sets in the gym testing out a certain protocol.

Also be willing to do the work to go back to the drawing board and look for a different source of advice if the first source didn't help much.

Don't limit yourself to sources who say fairly similar things as well. Be willing to experiment with radically different and conflicting advice. And completely block out the dummies who aren't actually testing shit.

Don't come into a sub like this and judge a resource based on how people here feel about it. Most of them are just sitting on their ass and the last time they talked to a girl was 3 weeks ago. Make your own decision through actually testing.

People make too many excuses when trying to fix their dating life.

The amount of work and consistency it takes to change your dating life is the same as the amount of work and consistency needed to change your physique. A lot of guys are just too egoistic to do that much work for dating because they don't want to fully face the reality of how much they suck at it.

TBearYCF · 2026-06-06T22:48:14+00:00

The decision is made before they even talk to you. The quick “yeses” only happen when you’ve developed some persona they know about in advance - from the minute you walk into the room or if they know of you prior.

Eg: if I match a woman on a dating app, my texting game is gonna seduce them into a Yes before we even meet. Have gotten so many Date 1 and Date 2 fucks this way.

You need to be surrounded by a fantasy for them instead of being just another cold approacher.

Title	Why is it always "maybe" with girls.
Author	EmperrorNombrero
Upvotes	50
Comments	45
Date	June 6, 2026 5:14 AM UTC (2 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ty86za/why_is_it_always_maybe_with_girls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-is-it-always-maybe-with-girls.1582193 https://theredarchive.com/post/1582193

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