Q4MEN: Would you abandon your family for a woman?

throwawayhouseissue1 · 2019-03-13T01:06:41+00:00

Short answer: absolutely. My family is crap. I would abandon them for my GF

Long answer: Probably not. If my whole family or most of them can't stand the woman I love, then I would listen to their reasons. If they are substantial reasons and factual "she made a racist comment, supported by actions that show she generally doesn't like a certain race" then I might have to put away my rose tinted glasses and reevaluate what I am doing. If my family's reasons are crap, like my family mostly is, (ur gF is Asian? What is wrong with you, you need a white chick!) Then yeah, I am cutting them out. No 2nd chances there, not interested in wasting my life around people who fundamentally are assholes.

darksoldierk · 2019-03-13T04:33:03+00:00

Why are you being so black and white? "either this or that". This is not a question rooted in the real world.

My uncle married a woman that the family couldn't stand. For 40 years, the family saw her a handful of times. She was nice enough to not hold it against him, and let him be with his family during family events. He was smart enough to not mention her or talk about her at said family events. And that was that.

At the end, I think your question is pointless, but if I had to answer, I'd leave the woman. I've done and said some pretty terrible things to my dad, but he stuck by me and has always been there fore me the whole way, I doubt any woman is capable of that kind of love towards a man.

Drippyskippy · 2019-03-13T01:12:18+00:00

If you have to abandon something that is good for you for someone else, then that person isn't good for you.

gunbusterxl · 2019-03-13T02:48:13+00:00

Of course not. What kind of question is this? If they're that adamant about it, there's probably a reason. At the very least I'd want to know why. I can't imagine a good enough reason to chose some random woman over my family. It's not like there aren't several billion other women out there.

darudeboysandstorm · 2019-03-13T03:36:46+00:00

[deleted] · 2019-03-13T03:46:39+00:00

No.

[deleted] · 2019-03-13T04:15:19+00:00

No. She is fine alone. My family would bring disaster to itself if it didn't have my income and help.

They almost could not survive me leaving my parents home. If my income didn't complement theirs, they are sure to suffer.

My family is quite good but also quite incompetent. They do not see the value of cold reasoning, effort and realism. Making me be the sound of reason (and its hands) most of the time.

My brother at least is learning now. Just in time as our father is retiring for good now.

I don't intent to cause the indirect death of any of my family members, So no, I will not leave them. I don't believe a woman worth loving would be that hatted by my family either (Unless she was an atheist and a libertarian like myself)

exit_sandman · 2019-03-13T10:02:45+00:00

I'd argue that for at least somewhat mature guys, this depends more on the family than the woman in question: Some have parents and siblings they would turn their back on in a heartbeat, others don't.

Personally, I wouldn't, and a woman not getting along with my family would be a red flag. On the other hand, a friend of mine has a shitty family and he should have dumped them far sooner.

MrHerbSherman · 2019-03-13T01:27:20+00:00

I can’t reasonably imagine a situation in which this happens.

Anyway I have an anecdote tho, my mom is Hispanic and my dads family really didn’t like that, he didn’t care, he dated her and eventually married her anyway. They eventually came around

Moral of the story is that a lot of times people will get all bitchy trying to interfere in your life but at the end of the day they’ll usually accept reality when it becomes clear to them they have no other choice

hammerhaunts · 2019-03-13T00:53:07+00:00

It depends on what they don't like her for.

EsauTheRed · 2019-03-13T02:21:31+00:00

No, that never goes well

If you're that infatuated with a woman it's a bad, bad sign

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DaphneDK42 · 2019-03-13T02:22:01+00:00

Yeah. Fuck them.

[deleted] · 2019-03-13T03:50:09+00:00

They wouldn't be abandoned, they would just be kept apart. Which tbh is something I'd rather have anyways. I like things compartmentalized, I don't like different elements of my life mixing together.

Zero_The-Hero · 2019-03-13T03:57:59+00:00

I'd never pick a women over my family unless I had a child with her or married her.

rxbDJ · 2019-03-13T04:54:04+00:00

I did this

Can confirm it turns out bad

Made me realize though that trying to choose a girl never works she has to somehow fall into your life BP style but you need RP style or better still GP style self improvement first

Basically God/fate chooses the women for you, the only alternative choice you can make is to run in the opposite direction from your fate and just get dragged along with even worse outcomes like being girlless for life because of avoiding your higher calling

Pastelitomaracucho · 2019-03-13T04:56:06+00:00

Depends. If I live at home with my family and I depend on them somehow, yes, because the living situation would become unbearable.

If I'm independent from my family, then no, I get to keep my girl.

[deleted] · 2019-03-13T07:47:19+00:00

No. She can’t be that great if my family dislikes her that much.

Gravel_Roads · 2019-03-13T08:02:27+00:00

I have already left my family for my partner. My family is super Christian and I'm super queer, so having a relationship is kind of mutually exclusive to staying in contact with my family.

[deleted] · 2019-03-13T11:56:40+00:00

My family emotionally abandoned me long before I did the same to them.

Personally, I'm so broken, weird and different I can't even connect with others anymore (maybe I never could and it was just hope that things could change).

So yeah once I'd know my family is doing alright for themselves I'd leave them and move away somewhere else, but not for a woman. I'm just sick of keeping up this farce for the sake of being tolerated.

abaxeron · 2019-03-13T13:39:26+00:00

would you abandon your family and go for the woman? When I say "abandon" I mean never talk to your family again.

Yes; my family's shit.

[deleted] · 2019-03-13T15:12:47+00:00

Lol I thought you meant "abandon your wife and kids" in which case my response would've been "maybe, if she fucks really well."

But abandon my kin? Never.

Bntt89 · 2019-03-13T18:09:22+00:00

No I would reconsider if I’m falling in love with this women I’m probably not in love with my wife so I would get a divorce.

ICantQuitReddit2 · 2019-03-14T21:44:42+00:00

Fuck no

Jackpot807 · 2019-03-15T08:20:16+00:00

If I were confident she were the one I’d start my own family with, then I’d cautiously (and probably with quite a bit of grief) move forward with her

[deleted] · 2019-03-16T16:41:54+00:00

Those who sever ties of kinship are cursed by God, so no, it would be insane to abandon the social safety net I was born with.

SirNemesis · 2019-03-16T17:40:57+00:00

Personally, I would. A lot of men wouldn't.

WestsideMoonWalker · 2019-03-13T00:52:33+00:00

They would have to be a real piece of work for my family to want nothing to do with them. I have to imagine that I'd rather choose family if that was the case.

3vilg0d · 2019-03-13T06:26:14+00:00

It's ungrateful to abandon family who nurtured you regardless of the reason. That person isn't a suitable choice of partner or friend for anyone.

Barely-moral · 2019-03-13T01:01:42+00:00

I don't speak to half of my family because they dissaprove of miss moral. I would stop speaking to the other half if they did the same.

The thing is, it isn't about a woman. First, because miss moral is awesome. Second, because it is really about they respecting me and my decision about whatever I want to do with my life.

[deleted] · 2019-03-13T09:05:31+00:00

I'd do whatever is best for my own mental health. I can't foretell the future. All I can say is I'd want to keep in contact with my children.

Title	Q4MEN: Would you abandon your family for a woman?
Author	cherryapp
Upvotes	4
Comments	65
Date	March 13, 2019 12:50 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/b0fnyg/q4men_would_you_abandon_your_family_for_a_woman/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4men-would-you-abandon-your-family-for-a-woman.256785 https://theredarchive.com/post/256785

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