Is dominance really the only path to respect?

popfriday · 2020-01-06T23:32:42+00:00

You’re playing straight into her game. She makes you jealous, you come storming in like a rabid baboon fighting her and fighting for her.

You’re feeding right into her ego after she cheated on you.

If your not being Alpha. You’re being embarrassing and predictable.

2020-01-06T22:22:37+00:00

It doesn't sound like you're dominating shit here man, she's getting exactly the drama she wants out of you.

Aaren_Augustine · 2020-01-06T22:03:48+00:00

Sounds like two moronic children failing to understand what adulthood looks like.

I normally try to have a rational healthy relationship. I set boundaries, behave stoically when they're pressed and leave when they're broken.

No you don't. Normal people avoid this stupid crap like the plague.

How do I apply it to a healthy functioning relationship?

By actually having boundaries and defending them correctly; which is the exact opposite of this little story right here.

GreenSatyr · 2020-01-06T22:05:07+00:00

I have some harsh words for you but I hope you take them in the right spirit.

You're having these experiences because you are the kind of guy who gets into fights at clubs. Who shoves your partner in anger. Therefore you are in relationships with those types of people.

My partners don't act like this at all. They would respect me even if I curled up into a ball and cried for a week. But my partners wouldn't respect you in that way, if you had pulled any of this shit with any of my partners they would have dumped you instantly. Not even considered for FWB. In fact theywould have considered you a hazard to have around, if you go around ready to start fist fights over two people flirting.

If you want to be respected in a healthy way then you have to be the kind of person who healthy egalitarian people view as respectable. Right now, by being the sort of person who starts fights and shoves, you can only attract the sort of people who do not understand how to allocate respect. You will attract the sort of people who find validation in the fact that you will raise your fists for them, who will take domineering possessiveness as a sign of your attraction to them. If that's not the kind of person you want then you need to work on who you are.

PUNCH_DOG · 2020-01-06T21:43:42+00:00

You think she only respected you because you beat her in a fight?

The ultimate power is not dominance but the ability to walk away when your boundaries are crossed.

BorderCollieFlour · 2020-01-07T01:45:11+00:00

Wtf? Why are you starting fights with strangers that "your" girl chooses to flirt with? Sounds like you need to learn respect and humility; having to prove your worth by physically bullying other men is the opposite of high value, and it's a disgrace to the martial arts that you practice. From what you've written here, you come across as an immature, pathetic loser

2020-01-06T22:23:53+00:00

[removed]

WestsideMoonWalker · 2020-01-06T23:36:47+00:00

Nah. That relationship sounds like a bullshit trainwreck. Da fuck is this man?

But seriously, you don't need to be dominant to be respected.

rus9384 · 2020-01-06T22:17:25+00:00

It varies from person to person, from relationship to relationship.

However, I am gonna say submissiveness is not respect.

bonerdude420 · 2020-01-07T02:08:23+00:00

How can you be dominant over others when you can't even manage to control your own actions? You sound like a middleschooler

Pontifex_Lucious-II · 2020-01-07T03:09:04+00:00

Hate to be that guy. But this doesn’t sound like dominance, it sounds like violence and alcoholism.

AchromaticFade · 2020-01-06T21:45:51+00:00

Respect yourself and block her, you are putting yourself through useless drama. You established boundaries then break them as if they never were there. You promote what you permit - you go back to her, you prove you have no value and she is allowed to test how far she can go. Lastly, I would consider some hobby for your anger release, if you indeed "shoved" her.

gunbusterxl · 2020-01-06T23:46:42+00:00

You're getting played, not being dominant.

She wants drama, and you're giving it to her. She also sounds like bad news. Block her phone number, and block her on social media. Move on with your life. In the future, avoid women like this.

HeckleandChide · 2020-01-07T00:35:04+00:00

Dominance generates respect. That's pretty much universal.

There are different kinds of dominance though. There's the juvenile, moronic "drunken naked sexy fist fight" type of dominance - which is paint-chip level stupid on many levels, the most obvious being DV charges. On the opposite end of the spectrum, there's the quiet, restrained "I get my shit done no matter what and cannot be moved by the storms of life" type of dominance.

Shittier people tend to be attracted to the first kind. Better people to the second kind.

Redslif · 2020-01-07T06:36:31+00:00

With all due respect dude, you are a moron!

Your actions are that of a triggered snowflake. Don't lie to yourself that you are a dominant man. The reason she keeps testing you is because instinctively she realizes that your dominance is really showboating and that you are extremely insecure internally.

Dominance is something that comes naturally to a guy. You can cultivate some of those traits if you are aware of the Redpill but more often than not that mask slips off at certain testing situations like in your case.

You shoved her and then left? That screams of insecurity, how the hell did you arrive at the conclusion that it was dominant? You have the complete wrong interpretation of dominance.

Mercurialsulfuras · 2020-01-06T21:41:17+00:00

You're either at the table or on the menu

Workaholiconew · 2020-01-06T21:49:52+00:00

To women? Might as well be.

We, men, long ago learned to friendly compete (games) and not 'hierarchically dominate' others but women did not, they value way too much social standing and social interaction, they ravel on such drama, to every male dismay. I hate as much as you to dominate a household, and I only dominate women because I need. I do not need any more responsibility.

I cannot tell how you need to behave, I find it quite borish, but one thing is for sure, women care too much about social standing to let go of the idea of a domination scale. You have to be mindful if you don't want to be taken for a ride.

If you are refusing to dominate your equal, in my mind the best idea is to just... don't interact with women at all.

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prodopro · 2020-01-07T08:21:33+00:00

The title sounds like you are messing up cause and effect. The more respect you have the more dominant you are per definition. Haven't read the post yet but maybe your definition of dominant isn't "having power and influence over others" - which you automatically gain when you are respected.

v1cgt · 2020-01-07T08:36:32+00:00

Dang bro, you coming off really immature. You gotta do some soul searching. Cut the bs games out. I find it funny u got mad at your fwb for going on a date lol. Bro she's not your girl if shes just something u smashing why u acting like a bitch getting all sensitive.

But from the replies you given in this thread this doesn't matter to you. Just feeding the ego eh.

Check out Patrice o'neal black Philip show if you want wisdom.

GrievenLeague · 2020-01-07T15:55:04+00:00

Your ex is a bratty girl and she wants to get in trouble to have her ass beat. If you like brats, keep going and put her in place. If you don't, then break up with her. Stop taking this road of super nerdy analyzing bullshit; you have a girl that wants you to go tiger.

This is why all men should get into BDSM.

Edit: CTRL + F, typed brat, got no highlights except my comment. This is why you shouldn't ask PPD this.

Gravel_Roads · 2020-01-07T18:10:14+00:00

Dominance in a field, ie "competence" inspires respect naturally; people instinctively value people who know how to get things done (though it will probably rely on what the individuals of any given environment want done. Excelling in a field of piers will get you further than excelling at idk, origami when you're living among people who value animal husbandry.)

Dominance through intimidation (ie physical aggression, banding people together against you, overbearing personality ect), tends to just be relying on bullying tactics, and only works in a wider scale if you go full North Korea and squash every sign of dissent. Because people don't like to be bullied, so your "respect" will only last as long as you can hold a gun to their head.

dicklord_airplane · 2020-01-07T19:42:43+00:00

You need to stop going after the exact same types of girls. You're choosing violent, irrational women when you have the power to walk away.

first and foremost, stop going after women who have a history of violence. Women who enjoy boxing and other real-life violence are always going to be like this. women who have a history of starting dramatic, violent arguments are always going to be like this. walk away as soon as you see the red flags, and STAY AWAY. don't go crawling back to them just because you're horny.

This is a dead serious warning: you are going to end up in jail with a permanent record as a wife beater if you keep having drunken fights with women. Stay away from women who want to fight, and walk away when a fight starts.

2020-01-06T21:55:42+00:00

Yes. Kill or be killed

Emervila · 2020-01-07T00:09:27+00:00

I think you are wrong, that's not respect but fear. She kinda twisted thou.

I don't think that's respect bc she was flirting with another man in your face and admitted that in your face. How's that been respected? you are toxic and sexy for her and in-doors she likes she fears your violence.

I also don't believe it's dominance bc she goes with other men whenever she likes in your face, you dumped her for that and she did it again. You are a Chad to her, a source for kinky sex and a fuckboy at most.

Women who respect and are actually dominated by their man, they remain loyal.

Seems like you are not able to deny sex to her, am I right?

Title	Is dominance really the only path to respect?
Author	PUNCH_DOG
Upvotes	4
Comments	130
Date	January 6, 2020 9:39 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/el0t7w/is_dominance_really_the_only_path_to_respect/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/is-dominance-really-the-only-path-to-respect.304464 https://theredarchive.com/post/304464

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