It's Not Her

bobaisdope · 2018-06-02T11:03:57+00:00

Before making any woman-related decisions, bust a nut first, then your logic works.

ZidaneLoire · 2018-06-02T14:51:36+00:00

I believe behind every great red pilled man, there's a bad oneitis. Maybe you got her. Maybe you never got her.

But without that crushing, aching, drop you down on your knees and put you in a catatonic state pain, you would never have become a red pilled man. Shit i knew rp in my late teens and this older rp guy (40s) said i would never understand it until i saw some shit. I didn't believe it, but he was right.

That's how I see my past oneitis. She wasn't a perfect person but she had a perfect role to play. To break my stone hard beta shell so I could grow out of it. Oneitis isn't a curse on your life. It's your release.

It's like the lobster grows. The shell is hard and doesn't grow. When it feels pain it notices it's time to grow and leaves the shell. During this process the lobster is very vulnerable while her new shell is hardening, but after that it's nearly indestructible to other marine life.

So be like the lobster. The pain signals your old shell is to be dumped and a new shell is under it aching to harden. Your new you rising from your core.

Embrace the pain and your new you. Ditch the old shell. To hold yourself back is to deny your natural evolution process.

Zech4riah · 2018-06-02T10:18:34+00:00

You know, men love unconditionally after pair bond has been formed which makes most of this rant irrelevant.

KeffirLime · 2018-06-02T11:46:07+00:00

We forget that all relationships are somewhat transactional. They have something we desire and vice versa. It's how she makes you feel, it's not really her. Its what you have to offer, it's not really you.

This is why abundance is so important. So that your entire supply of sex, emotional support etc doesn't rest on one individual.

FlockaTV · 2018-06-02T09:24:32+00:00

Think of her while taking a shit, thats how i got over my gfs tbh

XtoDoubt · 2018-06-02T13:18:53+00:00

Obviously I miss the sex. But I miss the affection way waaaaaaaaaay more. If it was just about the sex I'd really be fine just jerking off and not worrying about picking up women.

qmc214 · 2018-06-02T13:48:13+00:00

Going thru this same thing now. Constantly reaching out and being rejected. Why do i still do it? Probably because im 40 and shes 23 and i think ill never get a young chick like that again. Why cant i just have the mindset of "fuck her if she doesnt want me. Her loss, ill get another one"?

Couple months ago she said "i love you" and "im obsessed with you" every damn day. She always said "we can get thru anything together". Now shes gone and wont talk to me or see me and like a little bitch i cant get her out of my head. I know im being a bitch and i need to snap out of it.

lehappyjuice · 2018-06-02T10:16:49+00:00

And what if I miss the human being

ploppylumpkins · 2018-06-02T14:34:40+00:00

Just thank your lucky stars you didn’t get married and have kids with her. You got off easy.

tropzumuch · 2018-06-02T11:26:35+00:00

This reads like a message to OP himself

The_Chiselnator · 2018-06-02T14:34:22+00:00

Fuck a hundred women. Learn what they are. Trust me; when you have a married thot with your dick in her mouth then pausing to call her loser husband to bitch at him for not remembering to get the chicken out of the freezer and then letting you fuck her in the ass 2 seconds later you will think twice about your love bullshit. No woman other than your mother will ever even remotely care for you other than what you can give her i.e. resources. And even your mother might not.

If you want to have kids select their mother carefully. Breed. Raise your kids strong.

Love is bullshit for losers.

TissueBabies · 2018-06-03T00:12:26+00:00

I get the point of this post for most of the community but it doesn't apply to me and probably a lot of guys using women to fill voids in their lives.

My oneitis had bullet proof frame, a deep sense of self, incredible confidence and insight into the human condition plus several other qualities rare in men and virtually non existent in women.

Prior to red pill I lacked all those things and was drawn to her to compensate.

There are plenty of guys on here, superficial Chad's, who fell in oneitis with a woman not for sex, but to fill the holes in their character. Obviously that doesn't work and hence they found trp.

Jerking off or fucking other women didn't make any difference for me. Only introspection and hard work to improve had a positive impact.

Sittingonabigbluebox · 2018-06-02T17:17:54+00:00

The oneitis that caused me to come here I thought was hot af and I was beta af. Friends used to say she wasn't that good looking. A year later and I decided to look at photos of her and I'm just thinking, "wow, I had oneitis for THAT? All that shitbi went through and she wasn't all that good looking. Damn son, what were you thinking?" Lack of abundance was where my head was at. I laugh at it now. Fucking love red pill.

Rhynovirus · 2018-06-02T21:15:06+00:00

Shorter this thread: have a vetting process before you LTR a woman and sort your own shit out first.

Remember boys: LTR and marriage is RedPill on Hard Mode

FlyGuwop · 2018-06-02T12:26:29+00:00

Just go along with it and get every drop out of her while you can.

Joethe31 · 2018-06-02T13:36:31+00:00

It’s a shame I can’t just forget my ex 100%. Should have had better pull out game.

fridgefucker12 · 2018-06-02T18:05:13+00:00

God damn feel like you wrote this for me.

redd_reality · 2018-06-02T18:42:40+00:00

You're addicted to the drug of sex and love because the pain of becoming a man is too heavy for your bitch ass to bare.

[deleted] · 2018-06-02T22:42:58+00:00

Holy fucking shit.

Literally how I'm feeling right now. Ex used to fuck the soul out of me. Sucked the semen out of me like an M&M through a straw and rode me better than a cowboy rides a horse. This post spoke to me. I only miss the sex and the things she did for me. Not her.

Thanks!

EDIT: Just busted a nut. Logic has returned.

Theprimevoyager · 2018-06-02T16:51:05+00:00

Just finally rewired my brain after I was forced to "kill the puppy". This post is 100% right. I would get a few drinks in me once every two weeks and reach out. She would humor me but obviously it's done. The pair bonding chemicals have subsided and I have gone over a month without that 'empty' feeling or any of that reaching out bullshit. Now she's the one to text(deleted the number, didn't block) every week and I just ignore it. I don't question it or reply. Haven't been laid since but improvement within myself is going quite well.

I miss her body surely, but all the other bullshit and her BPD tendencies have sharpened me into something better.

GoGetting · 2018-06-02T15:52:41+00:00

And then?

Your philosophy cannot possibly bring you happiness. Only misery, resentment, the feeling of you versus them.

You're going to die alone, OP. You're going to lie on that death bed, alone, thinking "yeah, I bust so many nuts, yeah... I'm... happy... right...". Happy about that?

You're going to be a miserable withered old man, waiting for the cardiogram to flatline, after which no one will give a shit.

Hurray. At least you didn't get one-itis.

Thrawy124 · 2018-06-04T23:08:53+00:00

How do you avoid this feeling of routine?

I chose ransoms days throughout two months to go to this girls house, yet as soon as it was over, I missed the place, not her, she was a bitch, but the house and the experiences I got from it, I'll never forget the house.

When it dawned on me that I would never go to that house again, my first thought wasnt"Let's find another one" it was "I miss it".

Strange.

pohlrich · 2018-06-03T06:39:17+00:00

another utter nonsense post.

GanksGriefersForFun · 2018-06-02T21:06:03+00:00

Cold hard FACTS. Another fact you instantly make apparent is that many people aren't people we even love. It's just sex that drives many men towards women. This is bad on both ends. Women should strive to be good company and men should choose women they love to stay in their lives. Dragging things out is detrimental in the long run.

SeemedGood · 2018-06-02T20:43:12+00:00

Nah man. You’re thinking like a woman. Men actually are capable of loving a woman for who she is as opposed to simply her utility to us.

That’s actual love, it’s masculine and we should embrace it.

It is, however, no excuse for oneitis. We should be judicious in extending our love and cease extending it to the vast bulk of women who are utterly incapable of honoring it.

But to deny our ability to love out of frustration that women cannot love us and thereby become as corrupted effeminate as they have is to doom humanity to total degeneration.

Enjoy the decline by taking advantage of it, but don’t become the decline.

Edit: typo

Suffercure · 2018-06-02T13:37:54+00:00

Do you even like her?

Do you even know her?

Yes, but does my oneitis? No

openWh1te · 2018-06-02T18:12:16+00:00

Anyone read the book The Great Gatsby?

Don't let "the one" be your Daisy !

VillagersUnite · 2018-06-02T22:27:50+00:00

All these things that were mentioned. Instant morning blowjobs and all. I guess people really had it made lol. I don't have shit to miss. That makes my past break up easy to get over. I never had anything really worthwhile from that girl. Sounds pretty shitty now that I think on it.

Shaman6624 · 2018-06-02T22:28:06+00:00

What is love? Baby don't hurt me.

BaelorsBalls · 2018-06-02T23:58:35+00:00

What is dead may never die but rises again harder and stronger

OfficerWade · 2018-06-03T00:50:29+00:00

One of my mentors growing up said it right. Let’s say her name is Susan. I told him I wanted her back because all women are like that and since we have a child together we should try and make it work..

“Find another Susan”

His words haunt me because how detached he was emotionally when he said. I mean, there’s no strings attached, just get you another girlfriend. You’re still the man you always wanted to be and noting has changed that. Nothing will ever change that. Indeed, some things never change.

Westkanyewest1 · 2018-06-03T02:54:20+00:00

This entire subreddit is run my betas who have been rejected by a girl they like and then try to compensate for their crippling insecurity by reducing themselves to nothing more than material and sexual desire and women to nothing more than sexual objects. I thought this subreddit was about the matrix wtf

number1shittalker · 2018-06-03T05:15:21+00:00

It was the ass. Definitely the ass.

dwaynebenjamin · 2018-06-03T15:44:04+00:00

so what's the reversal of this where she glorifies you in her head and gets hooked?

Deeds of status? Dominance?

NiNj4_C0W5L4Pr · 2018-06-09T14:29:00+00:00

Sorry dude. Her & i were ~97-98% matched in our personalities, likes/dislikes, humor. I miss my soulmate, for that's what she was. She has the body and personality EVERY single guy on the planet would kill for! Together 6 years and she started the slow fade on me. I broke up with her because i know what want. I know what i will not tolerate. Second hardest thing i've ever had to do in my life. Quitting smoking was 1st. Not interested in looking for "Mrs. 99%" and i've had my share of meaningless sex. Listen to me and do yourself this favor: if she's not even close to the mirror image of you, same interests, same sense of humor, likes/dislikes ...then you.are.wasting.your.time. with the wrong person. Trust me. But even then, you MUST be true to yourself as a man and follow the rules you've setup for yourself! No matter how much it sucks, no matter how much it hurts. Your self respect is more important than throwing in the towel for fleeting pleasure.

shshshshady · 2018-06-25T02:49:35+00:00

Anytime I jerk off I get a moment of clarity and realize she ain’t sheeeeee

mikemnp11 · 2018-06-02T19:19:44+00:00

Golden ! I definitely miss her ass and boobs and actually nothing about her personality !

Yourgonnagofarkid · 2018-06-02T14:50:08+00:00

love her body - Gucci mane

“Do I love my butch or am I in love with her body?”

RedVelocitiy · 2018-06-04T16:22:26+00:00

Hah. I wrote something exactly like this in my personal logbook. We tell ourselves that "I don't give a fuck about her" "I can get better girls than her" "I don't need her". We all know deep inside were lying. Its okay to be human, to accept your humanity. Were not some psychopathic emotionless robots than can't form bonds with people. We are human.

Rathadin · 2018-06-02T13:38:02+00:00

Old school music was raw about it...

Donna Summer's Bad Girls:

I got what you want, you got what I need

Libranite · 2018-06-02T15:36:19+00:00

Applies to non-women related issues too. Nutting reduces stress and allows you to make better decisions.

lilianluke · 2018-06-02T19:30:01+00:00

I do...

Stop trying to cope with the pain of losing her by telling yourself and others this bullshit. Your only chance is to fight to get her back and keep her besides you, or die having lived in vain.

And you know it.

ouroboriccycle · 2018-06-02T21:10:17+00:00

I've been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend since I stumbled upon her on an internet community thing 2 years ago, all she's done for me is make pdf's about how she loves me, care about me, and draw about our relationship and such, as well as send me 2 nudes, and that was when I asked, waaayyy into the relationship, the span of time between each one was long too, in fact, I've actually sent her more nudes than she has. She's not the most attractive, but I sure as hell love her to bits, and most of the time I'm actually just thinking about the most innocent shit like cuddling and whatnot.

If you think that I don't love her, and I just love what she's done for me, like support me through hard times, then you are wholeheartedly wrong, because a male stranger can also do the same example I just mentioned, and he'd be my friend, but that wouldn't count towards what you are saying, would it?

Attempting to dissociate people and their actions, saying that you only love the former, and claim it's a "redpill" is really one of the most stupid things to do. Respect, love, friendship and the like is built up upon actions (as well as words), but i'm not friends with an action

You are using another usage form of the word love to say that you only love something, since it is a literary loophole in the english language, as it seems to be for most defined emotions, but you can't do the same with "friendship". Taking an example at hate, when you literary hate someone to death, you don't want to kill the actions, you want to kill the person that did them. you can hate people playing loud music, but you can't kill the action of "people playing loud music", you can however, if you so desire, kill the people who performed such action

I'm pretty sure we can say case closed

Title	It's Not Her
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	579
Comments	191
Date	June 2, 2018 8:22 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/8nz8cf/its_not_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/its-not-her.50623 https://theredarchive.com/post/50623

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