Girlfriend refuses marriage proposal until boyfriend gets circumcised [x-post]

Wisemanner · 2016-10-11T14:58:57+00:00

Yes. It's your body. That's the answer she'd give to you if the situation was reversed.

What if you get it done to please her, and then the marriage only lasts a short while?

ImTiredOfTheInternet · 2016-10-11T14:58:59+00:00

You were absolutely right. Its like her wanting to marry you and you refuse unless she gets surgery on her boobs a few sizes.

Dude I been down a similar road, thats not fair to you in any way and if thats a demand for marriage, who knows what else she'll demand from you.

MagicTampon · 2016-10-11T14:57:46+00:00

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-_-I-_-I-_- · 2016-10-11T15:00:35+00:00

I would have told her that I would get circumcised right after she got circumcised, so basically never. The guy did the right thing.

DaneWhitman · 2016-10-11T15:25:08+00:00

You're lucky that she's revealing herself to be such a bitch before you get married and not after. It gives you the chance to get out without the legal complications of marriage.

Like everyone else has said so far, this is a totally unreasonable request. Try turning the tables on her and telling her you want her to undergo cosmetic surgeries before you marry her. See what she thinks about that, and then ask her why she expects you to do something she wouldn't do herself.

Lethn · 2016-10-11T15:00:01+00:00

Yes, you were, this woman and her friends sound like a bunch of controlling and manipulative sociopaths. Had you married her you would have inevitably ended up like the millions of married men out there who have been completely cuckolded by their wives and her friends.

Don't go out with a girl out of peer pressure, especially if they're all trying to manipulate you into harming yourself. I would also avoid even associating with people like her from now on because it's obvious they're going to be unpleasant to even hang out with because they don't respect you or as it turns out they don't respect the right to keep your own body intact.

I would love to have some fun with people like this myself but I don't encounter them in real life, I might have brought up FGM and watch them go ballistic over it and then watch them squirm and make excuses over male circumcision. It's such an unbelievably hypocritical viewpoint and says a lot about people who hold those kinds of beliefs.

buster2209 · 2016-10-11T18:22:33+00:00

Talk about red flags!

If a women is not into spontaneous sex with you, then you're being eyed up for a wallet who will get close to zero sex once she gets a ring on her.

Wisemanner · 2016-10-11T15:45:50+00:00

I would make a further point here. I would suggest every male in a relationship with a female needs to say "No!" from time to time. And they need to stick with the decision. Do not give in on every point

BDMR_lurker · 2016-10-11T18:28:05+00:00

They usually wait till after the wedding to try and rip your balls off.

I guess foreskin is foreplay.

thehungriestbear · 2016-10-11T20:56:27+00:00

"My body, my choice" only applies to people with vaginas, apparently.

Nik-kik · 2016-10-11T20:32:09+00:00

I hate to say it, but what a twat.

My friends and I have had this conversation before. They say uncircumcised penises look ugly. I don't know if they'd go so far as to tell their bf to get circumsized before they get married.

I'm a personal fan of uncircumcised penises for a handful of reasons, and it's a pet peeve of mine how ignorant people are of foreskin.

Ladies have foreskin too and I don't see them complaining about it never being clean for some reason or other.

I'd have personally dumped her after trying to reason with her, but I think it's rude and asinine to ask someone to change something natural about themselves before marriage. If you don't like it, don't stay with them.

Muesli_nom · 2016-10-11T15:16:55+00:00

Opposite experience. Was dating a girl some time back, and before we got physical she asked my if I was circumcised. Nope, I wasn't. Her reply? "Nice!" Apparently, her experiences with circumcised men hadn't been all that positive.

Concerning the post itself: Was he right? I would say yes. Once the foreskin is off, there's no going back, unlike with marriage. You can divorce someone, you cannot replace the skin. Taken from an article linked a bit earlier in this sub, this is a young man who got circumcised at 16:

"[T]he feeling in the sexual contact was affected, it was wrecked. There was a great deal less sensitivity and I needed a higher level of stimulation to reach erection. Two years ago, when I entered the Technion, the subject started to bother me. I am a person who often looks back, and unfortunately I cry over spilt milk. I understood unmistakably that I had made a mistake. I was 16 and I was an idiot."

Secondly: Let's play the ever-popular gender-reversal game: How would a woman react if a man told her "I will only marry you if you get your genitals mutilated for me. You know, because of hygiene."? I think I can hear the screams of outrage already, calling it "inhumane barbarism". But when women expect it of men, it's okay... exactly how?

blueXcat · 2016-10-11T18:46:36+00:00

GOOD, it ends well.

PotatoDonki · 2016-10-12T03:13:27+00:00

I've never had an experience quite on this level, but I've certainly heard enough to feel ashamed of my foreskin. It makes me worry about the prospect of first times with women because it's hard not to worry about their reaction. It really is a shame.

We all lose. Boys are forced into it, and those who are lucky enough (like myself) to not have gone through it feel ashamed of how they were born.

I remember when I was younger and first discovering my sexuality, I actually told myself that I would voluntarily get circumcised once I was old enough. I'm an adult now, and luckily I changed my mind, but how terrible is it that I was driven to think that way? As a child?

n0ahbody · 2016-10-11T15:16:46+00:00

Imagine if a man told a woman she had to get her genitals mutilated before he'd give her a job, or marry her, or whatever. That man would be a monster. For example, imagine if there was a video of Trump saying to a Miss Universe contestant, "If you want to be a contestant here, you're gonna have to get bigger boobs and an ass implant." He would be crucified. Your ex girlfriend should be crucified for what she said to you. Glad you're smart enough to realize you had to drop her like a ton of bricks. She's a monster and would have ruined your life. Do whatever you can to prevent her from ruining some other guy's life. Shame her if you can.

JestyerAverageJoe · 2016-10-11T16:16:36+00:00

Other reddit's thread. No participation!

oshmkufa2010 · 2016-10-11T20:15:20+00:00

Wow, talk about superficiality. You're getting married because you're in love, not because of his dick, cunt. Glad that he dodged that bullet, though I imagine he'd have prefered to not go through this, but what can you do? She'd have shown her true face eventually, so better sooner than later. At least that way he hasn't lost anything except a year and a half of his time. Better than losing your kids, your house, your friends and possibly even your job over a messy divorce with a lunatic.

Bestoftherest222 · 2016-10-11T20:25:19+00:00

Must've been a bad relationship if the female thought she could leverage the man mutilating his junk to become her eternal wage slave.

HotDealsInTexas · 2016-10-11T22:01:58+00:00

I've taken the ring back today and got a full refund, thankfully.

Thank God OP made the right decision.

CaptainnT · 2016-10-12T10:16:49+00:00

That is the type of woman you run away from, and you keep running and never look back.

MotherFuckin-Oedipus · 2016-10-11T17:44:01+00:00

Dude dodged a bullet.

Makes you wonder how well he knew her. 18 months isn't really all that long, either, but I feel like you should know about these kinds of deal breakers before you even think about buying a ring.

Taylor1391 · 2016-10-11T18:00:36+00:00

Well, that guy dodged a bullet. He was absolutely right to dump her. Why would you marry someone who thinks they get a say in what your body looks like? Sucks that he wasted so much time, but it's always better to find out now rather than later.

anarchop · 2016-10-12T09:40:43+00:00

dump her get another one - you'll have a great story to tell to the next one

RebelWitch · 2016-10-12T11:09:13+00:00

She has no idea how disgusting and wrong she is. She just expects you, the man, to get it done because in her eyes (and many people) a mans feelings and his body does not matter. It is all about her, that is what you need to understand and what she cannot get over.

You are better off without her, this is the kind of woman who will react based on her feelings and opportunities given to her rather than thinking about how her actions affect other human beings. The kind of woman that will not regret divorcing you and taking everything she can, once she has made her feelings up with a few sound excuses. If she cannot understand how wrong she is in this situation, she would be a nightmare later on with another. You are very lucky I would say.

Elvick · 2016-10-13T06:25:18+00:00

I'm thrilled the guy left her, and I hope he stays firm in that.

The would be mother-in-law sounds like a psychopath. So he dodged multiple bullets getting out of that relationship.

ThePigmanAgain · 2016-10-11T21:56:55+00:00

Not only does OP have a foreskin, he apparently also has balls! The way so many of today's men are, i actually was expecting him to give in to her demands that he mutilate himself. As for the woman in question, she is a piece of shit and i hope she ends up with some abusive bastard who refuses to marry her unless she gets her clitoral hood hacked off.

pwnepwne · 2016-10-12T01:42:33+00:00

You did the right thing. That is a major bullet you dodged. Getting you to snip your dick is a test to eventually turn you cuck.

TNAA- · 2016-10-11T18:02:40+00:00

You're lucky if you relationship with her is over, she is selfish

liztheheretic · 2016-10-11T18:42:10+00:00

Yeah, breaking up was the right decision. It sounds like this girl has issues (the hygeine obsession - untreated OCD, maybe, although of course this is just the speculation of a random internet person, I'm not qualified to diagnose anything). Requiring you to damage your own body is a completely unreasonable request.

yo-yo-baggins · 2016-10-11T20:19:49+00:00

I predict one of two futures for this girl. Future one, she meets a circumsized guy.
Future two, she meets another uncircumcised guy.

In future two she will probably be gun shy about owning up to her own personal feelings on the subject. Will probably marry him. Will have sexual hangups for the rest of her life.

I applaud both of your, you were not compatible for each other. Good luck on the next girl.

functionalsociopathy · 2016-10-12T05:33:57+00:00

Yes, you were right. I also want to congradulate you on a bullet well dodged. If maiming yourself is a requirement for her then she deserves to be alone.

BabboonQueen · 2016-10-11T22:26:33+00:00

[deleted]
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^<sup>0.5519</sup>

What is this?

2016-10-11T15:42:56+00:00

dude could have woken up to her trying to cut off his penis. That girl has a obsession with male genital cutting.

He should tell her to get circumcised first since the vagina produces more smegma than a penis. She's a fucking moron, the foreskin has important protective and sexual functions.

EduBA · 2016-10-11T20:07:44+00:00

Weren't I an Atheist would say that a miracle saved his life: Imagine years and years with that woman...

stemgang · 2016-10-12T01:24:48+00:00

Monstrous.

Faryshta · 2016-10-12T01:31:59+00:00

I would never marry a woman who doesn't have breast implants

I would never marry a woman who haven't got laser hair removal

I would never marry a woman before a vaginoplastia (reducing the size of the pussy lips)

I would never marry a woman who doesn't have tongue and nipple piercings.

roharareddit · 2016-10-12T02:56:53+00:00

Yes, you were right. Fuck that bitch.

PotatoDonki · 2016-10-12T03:54:57+00:00

Does anybody know where the original post is?

Billieliebe · 2016-10-12T05:51:15+00:00

Oh wow. As a woman I prefer uncircumcised. Nature's ribbed condom but with skin.

splodgenessabounds · 2016-10-12T08:01:29+00:00

I dunno who this poor sod is that you're posting about, but I'd be in bits if that had happened to me a day or so ago, never mind posting the details on reddit.

That aside, couldn't she have done the proper thing and sat him down for a Serious Talk before he went to all the trouble (and expense) of a ring, 1st class train, hotels blah blah? Couldn't she have said one night when they were making the beast with two backs "Dearest, there's something I have to say to you"? What is it with some people that they cannot - or will not - just front up with whatever's bothering them, particularly given it's their likely lifetime partner they're addressing?

(sigh)

Oh well, I suppose she could have let him go through with the whole thing - the rings, the wedding, the guests, the reception, the honeymoon - and then dumped on him, so I suppose on that basis he got off light.

P.S. Thrush isn't generally thought of as an STI, nor is it AFAIK "caught" from a sexual partner (uncircumcised, circumcised or with their cock tied in a knot).

KryptoKnight77 · 2016-10-12T12:28:20+00:00

What if the genders were switched? There would be outrage.

jmg83 · 2016-10-12T13:22:50+00:00

This has got to be a wind-up.

I wish I were intact, if only to mess with stupid women like this. the fact that such idiots approve of my mutilation disgusts me.

PierceHarlan · 2016-10-12T14:50:33+00:00

Yes, she's irrational and controlling. It would be a mistake to ignore this very significant red flag--you'd be asking for a lifetime of such behavior, and not just about your penis.

Senno82 · 2016-10-12T16:11:24+00:00

He dodged a bullet there. Show her the literature. And then have her grovel an apology.

Glassclose · 2016-10-12T16:30:53+00:00

You made the right decisions on many different levels. As she said, she was going to ask you to do this 'when you got serious' well you thought it was serious enough to ask for an engagement, she didn't think it was serious enough to ask you to chop off a part of yourself, let alone get engaged until you did, so clearly you both want/ed different things and were obviously in different places.

aussietoads · 2016-10-13T02:16:55+00:00

Would she be prepared to get a female circumcision for the exact same (supposed) health reasons.?

TheRavenousRabbit · 2016-10-11T16:09:15+00:00

This person was right. Imagine a dude going "Nah, your tits are too saggy. Get implants, then we can marry" and you'd get international news stories all across the world.

yo-yo-baggins · 2016-10-11T20:13:56+00:00

She is entitled to her own sexual preferences. He is entitled to stay uncircumcised. Before getting married, she let her preferences known. He dumped her.

I see nothing negative in this story. That she piped up about this before they tied the knot is a good thing.

eug3nius · 2016-10-11T15:05:26+00:00

Infant circumcision is a men's rights issue. This is just a quarrel between adults. Everyone has the right to decide what constitutes a deal breaker in a relationship. This woman decided that her deal breaker was foreskin.

xNOM · 2016-10-11T15:01:04+00:00

Writing flame: It's not "Girlfriend.... boyfriend." It's "Woman.... boyfriend."

TheSummerain · 2016-10-11T21:26:07+00:00

It's a dumb reason but she has every right to give it.

pdq_sailor · 2022-10-30T06:44:34+00:00

For some Women it is a deal breaker.. Ultimately they decide who they will have intimate relations with or not AND what the rules are to be.. She drew a line in the sand as is HER right and you chose to stay on your side of the line as is YOUR right... The only way to get it all is to give it all.. and right now you both have nothing. Why should you? To have her.. Why shouldn't you ? Because you decided she is not worth the price. Trust me its NOT the only negotiation you go through in terms of intimacy either..

Title	Girlfriend refuses marriage proposal until boyfriend gets circumcised [x-post]
Author	trampson
Upvotes	175
Comments	121
Date	October 11, 2016 2:39 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/56yay1/girlfriend_refuses_marriage_proposal_until/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/girlfriend-refuses-marriage-proposal-until.940017 https://theredarchive.com/post/940017

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