Tonight after a month of coldness I finally asked if she still loved me. Half expecting a "yes, of course I still love you but I'm unhappy" instead silence.

We've been married almost 11 years. The last year has been stressful on our marriage. Between having 2 kids under 6 and having 2 full time jobs living the suburban "dream". In the last 8 months my wife has taken on a new stressful management role. I have taken on a new management role as well during this time frame. Even prior to this year we had grown to be more roommates than lovers. Between the madness of parenting and exhaustion of work we had stopped making time for each other in the romantic sense. We had created a life together and for the most part I thought it was working. We literally had just bought a time share and a new car. Financially I was feeling pretty good like we were setting ourselves up for fun family memories to come.

It started feeling different after she took the new position. She is an amazing manager and has risen high up in her corporate job but the place she oversaw has caused her extreme stress. I would listen to her nightly vent about it. I did my best to console her and support her emotionally as I had done in the past when she got promoted to a new position. However, she started changing behaviorally including spending her weekends away from me with friends and family. At the time I thought she finally was resigned or respected the fact that I didn't like going to social events/gatherings. She used to ask me to join these in the past and I would try and get out of going. I always have been more of a home body. Now I didn't think anything of all of this until she took her girls trip last week. She left on her trip and never once reached out to me during the 4 days she was gone. I felt hurt and a bit disappointed she wouldn't have even checked in. Regardless, I didn't want to ruin her trip by reaching our to her so I waited until she came home on Sunday. Since she has been back she has been all business with me and not even wanting to talk. The red flags were now going off in my head that something is wrong. However, her silence after asking her if she still loved me sunk my heart. We waited until the kids went to bed and sure enough she came clean and said she doesn't love me anymore and wants to separate. She says she doesn't want to do counseling and she has made up her mind.

Absolutely crushed right now.

I never once thought this could all go away so quickly. Yet here I am trying to rationalize where I went wrong and what I could have done differently.