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anxious-american
[–]akashyaboaFDS Newbie632 points633 points634 points 5 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link
Guys are so weird.... He saw her before dating her ? Why date her at all if she's not to his liking? Wtf is wrong with him?
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[removed]
[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie39 points40 points41 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yup.
Scrote : ´ur a whale and now ur my whale, forever’ un-ironic evil cackling
They’re really like that, abusive people. They’ll use literally anything, but seem to try to pick something with societal reinforcement so it’s harder to tell them for the unreasonable fucks they are.
I’ve seen age, ethnicity, economic status, financial mistakes, addictions, oh pretty much anything used this way.
[–]OpalMoonbitsFDS Newbie197 points198 points199 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
She's fat, she must obviously have low self esteem so he can walk all over her, right? ((Sarcasm))
[–][deleted] 251 points252 points253 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I guess the point is to make her feel like she can't do better so that she doesn't leave him... haha how that backfired 😂
[–]atouchofrazzledazzleFDS Newbie83 points84 points85 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Bingo, that's exactly what he was trying to do.
[–]HmtnswFDS Newbie91 points92 points93 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Dated for the easy until something "better came along."
How much you wanna make a bet? Why are people like this?
[–]minid202088 points89 points90 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I went on a date with a 40 yo guy who showed up late and still hungover or was drunk and told me that “you’ll do”. Basically I’ll do until he could find something better. Finished my meal and left and as always they will keep calling me until I block them. If I was so bad, why do you still want more ??
[–]writingwolvesFDS Newbie77 points78 points79 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This energy is the same as when men message women in DMs, begging for their nudes, and when the women reject them, men start saying, "Well you're ugly anyway."
Then... why were you so desperate to see her naked? Your mom should have aborted you.
[–]ThoraFriganzaFDS Newbie98 points99 points100 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly, he has zero right to tell her how she's supposed to look like, just don't date her then, so simple.
[–]Equal-Ear2312FDS Apprentice49 points50 points51 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly!
Men with low self esteem - the joke is on them.
[–]Aley9814 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I believe he thought that he could change her if he dated her. Its messed up
[–]mjkmeow83FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No I’m sure if she tried to lose weight he would belittle and sabotage her the whole way.
[–]Equal-Ear2312FDS Apprentice250 points251 points252 points 5 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link
If men don't want to date fat women, why do they date them only to complain and call them names afterwards?!
Is it because they want the boyfriend benefits, like companionship, sex, emotional support, help, self esteem boost?!
No woman should accept less than Love in her life. Glad she dropped him.
[–]mountainbreadcycleFDS Disciple121 points122 points123 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
I had this happen to me. He ended up being a deeply insecure person whose manifestation of that insecurity was as covert narcissism. He love bombed me at first, then later started making comments to make me feel bad about my physique and how it wasn’t appealing. (he was a very petite man, and I am an average sized woman) My weight is and was within the “healthy BMI” range and I exercise at home. As things had been a little dull between us, I suggested a date night. He sneered and said that he didn’t find my weight attractive! I asked him why he had started dating me knowing this is what I look like, if he didn’t think I was attractive and he said it was because he was lonely and he wanted the “prestige” of being in a relationship. So, I took the trash out to the curb.
[–][deleted] 25 points26 points27 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh my Lord, I am so sorry you had to go through that hun. Glad you're doing better without him.
[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
One of mine struggled with their weight. I never brought it up, was supportive and helpful of any diet or exercise plan, and constantly reaffirmed them when they wanted validation they looked better.
I was slender. Then a bunch of stress happened and I gained a few pounds.
He started making comments. He squished my middle as if measuring it.
I started not seeing him.
Edit: I loved him at the size and shape I found him in (or loved the lovebombing lol) and his weight/shape was entirely his question not mine. Just to make clear I think everyone is both worthy of and capable of love.
[–]mountainbreadcycleFDS Disciple3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My thoughts exactly. We each one of us needs to know our worth and expect to be treated “nicely” as the bare minimum. We demand better than the bare minimum though, so, bye boy!
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]r4nd0m-u53rFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You are beautiful and amazing just the way you are. I know it isn't easy but don't spend any more time wondering if it was you, it was him and his own shit.
[–]Babooshka-123Pickmeisha™️47 points48 points49 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I think some guys assume fat girls will have lower self esteem, so will be a good target for manipulation and bullying. Thankfully not true as more women understand our true worth nowadays.
[–]Equal-Ear2312FDS Apprentice39 points40 points41 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
To the dumpster with them.
A body can change over time for better or for worse but a man who is an asshole today because it serves his interests and lack of trying will keep being an asshole tomorrow (because it worked for him in the past).
This is why we need to encourage women to not settle for anything less than Love and Respect.
[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
🎬
[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
If men don’t want to date « xyz » women, why do they date them ?
It’s simple. They want to treat you like garbage and also keep you chained to them thinking nobody could ever love you for real because you’re « xyz ».
[–]Equal-Ear2312FDS Apprentice8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Rhetorical question aside, girls, women, we should never date someone just so we are not "single"! If respect isn't served at your table, get yourself out.
We need to empower women to see their inherent value.
Don't be the person that goes on the relationship sub to be told she's taken advantage of only to return to the man that's disrespecting her boundaries and treats her as she's less than.
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]pearlspaghettiFDS Newbie55 points56 points57 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sis, what? You’re still with this jerk? Take out the trash! You deserve better than to have your partner constantly body shame you and lust over other women. If he wants a certain type of woman, his pathetic, crusty ass can go find one.
[–]lhatwFDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Girl.... I can’t.....these men are just gross. I’m so sorry love.
[–]Sensitive-Ad8553FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Leave. Him.
You deserve better, and there are men out there who love your body. Don’t spend any more time on scum like him.
My ex was the same way. I can’t believe I wasted nearly 2 years on him 🤮
[–]ReignOnYou95-2 points-1 points0 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Eventually I understood that society makes man show off skinny pretty wifes, but they actually wanna grab that fat ass and jiggle it like it's jelly cake.
Skinny shaming ngl..
[–]angrybaijaFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
hmm I can see what you're saying here... "society upholds skinniness but that's not what men actually want" is kinda a cringe sentence (however that interpretation might not have been its intent).
better sentiment might be "who gives a flying fuck what men are into. also they're (mostly 😒) not a monolith"
[–]jfk31989FDS Newbie63 points64 points65 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
This is why I’m hesitant to date at my current size. I’ve been lucky that I’ve always trusted my gut instinct and have never gotten into relationships where this would happen but I’ve seen it happen to my friends. LVM NVM like this prey on big women and make them feel like they can’t do any better and bleed them dry while usually encouraging them to get bigger. One of my friend’s ex’s told her he was afraid that when she lost the weight she wouldn’t be beautiful to just him anymore.
[–]Equal-Ear2312FDS Apprentice19 points20 points21 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Men that do that have a "fat fetish" besides a power and control one. They encourage their partner (aka Guinea pig) to modify their body for the man's enjoyment. Be it weight gain/loss, extreme muscle gain, body modification going to the extreme side, bimbofication through plastic surgery and implants, genital modification, extreme tattoos... They require it from their partner, they uglify their partner and then they tell their partner that no other men besides them will want them.
That's abuse.
Partner aka Guinea pig until something better comes along.
[–]ScrotonimoStiltonFDS Newbie128 points129 points130 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
That's the way it's done!
Every woman deserves to kick disrespect to the curb.
[–]to_learn_to_flyFDS Newbie111 points112 points113 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ahaha love her
[–]ahumblepastry7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This makes me happy every time I see it.
[–]fancysamosa6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Love this
[–]s_slayerFDS STRATEGY COACH8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Looks like a kid anyway. Get you a man (or be happily single too!), scrotes are always dead weight we don’t need!
[–]karaokekillerFDS Newbie43 points44 points45 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
YOU GO GIRL!!!
[–]BlueDoggerz24 points25 points26 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Whales are pretty anyway. Hes just insane. I had someone call me a beluga whale on a body positivity post. I spammed him with cute belugas and the song baby beluga.
[–]XxShykatxXFDS Newbie37 points38 points39 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I am so proud of you! 🥰💜
[–]mariaruubio2310 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
She's beautiful!!
[–]MissouriBlueFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I bet that’s the best you’ve felt in a while! Good going! You look so happy in the “after” photo.
Nobody needs a Negative Nicky in their life. I hope you value yourself and hold out for someone who loves the total package that makes you YOU!
Hugs from afar... 💕
[–]pikkpieFDS Newbie18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lmao that's clever of her
[–]i2aminspiredFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Gamer move, queen! Always drop the dead weight! ❤
[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Please accept me into your Royal service.
[–]r4nd0m-u53rFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I feel this so strongly.
At 15 the first boy to kiss me, didn't evan wait an hour after making out to call me fat (I was barely overweight) Luckily I had the common sense back then to knee him in the balls and all my friends were not kind to him when they found out.
Then there was the 24 year old pedophile who coerced me into sex at 16 and insulted my body after sleeping with me. The second he told me he wanted to get me pregnant I freaked out and blocked him.
[–]Perrytheplatypus03FDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yass!
[–]PumpkinTalkariFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yassss queeen!!!!
[–]Descendant_of_InnanaFDS Apprentice1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Queen energy right there, i just don't understand why is the left panel gray? Should it have been the right?
[–]spicyspaFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If he wanted a thin chick, he should've chosen a thin chick. Am I over thinking this? Anyways I am happy she dropped those awful pounds.
[–]MsCrys000 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I hope she did this for herself and not for the ex bf
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]Crushed_AvocadoFDS Newbie40 points41 points42 points 5 years ago* (7 children) | Copy Link
Queens don’t accept conditional love, from men or from themselves.
Self care and growth is a unique path for every woman. We’re not all aiming for the same end state, whether that be weight, education level, job or family dynamic. Yes, we all want to improve, but that can mean many things. Even if weight loss is a goal, you still need to level up your self esteem so that you love yourself and appreciate your body through all it’s stages.
[+]esseteaFDS Newbie-11 points-10 points-9 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
I don't think it is self loving to indulge self destruction, it does say in the handbook that if you are obese then work on that before dating
[–]Crushed_AvocadoFDS Newbie20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
If that works for you great. I think as long as your self esteem is solid and you’re able to easily walk away from red flags you’re good to go!
[+][deleted] 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Crushed_AvocadoFDS Newbie38 points39 points40 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Because I agree with most of it, but like all philosophy or methods you must always remain flexible enough so that it doesn’t become dogma, and you can account for necessarily flexibility to accommodate and apply it more broadly.
The handbook is a fantastic resource. At the crux of this entire approach to dating and life is the need to love and accept yourself at whatever stage you’re at in your journey. Love isn’t something reserved for those who’ve “levelled up”, it’s something we’re all worthy of without having to DO something to convince someone to love us. This is the beginning of undoing pick-me tendencies and unraveling internalised misogyny about female value and “being good enough”, which should not be confused with self care and love and acceptance.
[–]TheFinalGirl_21FDS Newbie16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I agree. It can be gradual. I didn’t realize how damaging porn was until reading more after I stuck around. At first, I was like,”What’s your beef, ladies? Consenting adults!” Took my awhile to come around.
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[–]akashyaboaFDS Newbie632 points633 points634 points (16 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie39 points40 points41 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]OpalMoonbitsFDS Newbie197 points198 points199 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 251 points252 points253 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]atouchofrazzledazzleFDS Newbie83 points84 points85 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]HmtnswFDS Newbie91 points92 points93 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]minid202088 points89 points90 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]writingwolvesFDS Newbie77 points78 points79 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]ThoraFriganzaFDS Newbie98 points99 points100 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Equal-Ear2312FDS Apprentice49 points50 points51 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Aley9814 points15 points16 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mjkmeow83FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Equal-Ear2312FDS Apprentice250 points251 points252 points
(22 children) | Copy Link
[–]mountainbreadcycleFDS Disciple121 points122 points123 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 25 points26 points27 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie18 points19 points20 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mountainbreadcycleFDS Disciple3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]r4nd0m-u53rFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Babooshka-123Pickmeisha™️47 points48 points49 points (3 children) | Copy Link
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[–]yolosunshineFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]pearlspaghettiFDS Newbie55 points56 points57 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]lhatwFDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]ReignOnYou95-2 points-1 points0 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]jfk31989FDS Newbie63 points64 points65 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Equal-Ear2312FDS Apprentice19 points20 points21 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ScrotonimoStiltonFDS Newbie128 points129 points130 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]to_learn_to_flyFDS Newbie111 points112 points113 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ahumblepastry7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]fancysamosa6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]s_slayerFDS STRATEGY COACH8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]karaokekillerFDS Newbie43 points44 points45 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]BlueDoggerz24 points25 points26 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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