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desertwildfire
[–]girludontbringhomeFDS Newbie202 points203 points204 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Dating straight men is so counter-intuitive. I kept pursuing and working hard for what I wanted career-wise, and I was rewarded. If I applied the same logic to dating though, I would just be taken advantage of. It really confuses me.
[–]chateauduchatFDS Newbie43 points44 points45 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I literally just came to this conclusion. I've had, if I may toot my own horn, an incredible amount of career success and more money in the bank than I ever had than while I was in a relationship. I have come to the conclusion that men cost me, in more ways than just financially. So until there is guaranteed ROI and subsequent profit, I will be avoiding $MEN for the foreseeable future.
[–]MindeskaFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
This is so true. I never really realised until the pandemic happened how much fucking TIME men and dating was costing me. Valuable hours of evenings and weekends I could have spent working on building my career, learning new things or doing freelance jobs. Men really do hold you back SO much.
[–]-badmadAMFDS Apprentice9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wow, I just realized how many girls and women I know with their awesome talents and potentials held in capture by some sort of LVM. Makes me wonder how much society as a whole is held back by this. (Think alone how much freelance work is often done by women. I also know family- run business where the woman put so much into, but of course it will always be known as the husband's business and tied to his name).
[–]chateauduchatFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Mmhmm! That’s why I don’t date men who can’t financially provide for my time. I literally calculated how many hours of work time I WASTED being in a shitty relationship. Literally if we as ladies could all quantify how much money we are losing out on by dating scrotes, it would literally be a game change. Time is your most VALUABLE ASSET.
[–][deleted] 150 points151 points152 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This why you should NEVER feel bad about keeping your standards sky high. Never compromise, never settle, never give into social pressure.
[–]Twolipz_78FDS Newbie88 points89 points90 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Well I know for me it was (and still kind of is) working on childhood trauma and daddy issues. The “need” for external male validation and approval that I thought I couldn’t live without.
[–]gosamadhiFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
That's interesting point of view, I think it applies to me
[–]woosawooFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think it applies to a lot more people than they think. Ever since Ive been going to therapy and working on this, I see this issue everywhere around me!
[–]eatchickpeasFDS Newbie259 points260 points261 points 5 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
seriously though i dont get why straight women are straight. its a miracle tbh. despite how low the bar is for men, despite all the abuse and suffering they place on women we collectively still dont go on murderous rampages or outright hate men. ive never heard of a female school shooter who got upset about being rejected from a date. you can walk into any book shop and buy books about men murdering women. rape in my country is endemic despite the tired mantra that 'men ProTect wOmEn'. heterosexuality feels like a conspiracy at times
[–]partypancakesbaconFDS Newbie62 points63 points64 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
As a woman, women are so much softer and beautiful, and most importantly have deeper ability to connect and to love. For me it’s a no brainer.
[–]Optimal_Grapefruit_5FDS Newbie17 points18 points19 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Women all the way. My fiancée's the first woman I dated and the first partner to love me for who I am.
[–]DaisyDooDropsFDS Newbie33 points34 points35 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I wonder what they’re “protecting” women from 🙄
[–][deleted] 41 points42 points43 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Seriously! In my country 2 years ago there was a series of murders by men who got rejected my women. So scary. Like why?
[–]wrice05FDS Apprentice0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
heterosexuality feels like a conspiracy at times
YES
[–]vntgRN90Throwaway Account20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Even worse: being attracted to a gay man. When he's so fabulous but will never like you lol. Cruel. And straight men who can actually like you are just horrible.
[–]throughalfanoirFDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
I swear there are so many ways gay men are more HV in on average... personal hygenie, interests, not giving in to traditional masculinity... edit: early morning grammar mistakes
[–]vntgRN90Throwaway Account11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Its true. My best friend is a gay man. He is HV in so many ways.
[–][deleted] 10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Really? Most of the gay men I’ve met are catty and mean. They certainly don’t seem to enjoy the company of women
[–]throughalfanoirFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
possible there are some like that, I will admit that my gay friends may not represent the average gay (in a country where LGBT people are widely attacked+college age) but they are generally nicer than the straight guys I know, but maybe I am just lucky have great friends!
[–]99powerFDS Apprentice23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My lesbian friends are trying to rehabilitate me out of it and yet 😂
[–]fermata102FDS Newbie20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This is one of those funny Memes I want to share publicly but would immediately be branded as problematic
[–]desertwildfireFDS Newbie[S] 12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Then you hanging around the wrong people maybe? Majority of females I know would 100% agree.
[–]libraliaFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yup, Color me coo coo bird because this is true. I giggled to hard at this. 🤦🏻♀️
[–]FadeToLifeFDS Newbie54 points55 points56 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
I’m a gay woman who spent way too much of my life trying to be straight for my parents views. My best advice is “don’t”’ I’ll be the first to say women can be just as grimey but they’re much more likely to give you an outlet.
[–]Optimal_Grapefruit_5FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Also the relationship's a lot more equal. It's hard to have a truly equal relationship with a man.
[–]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
women can be just as grimy
How so?
[–]shapelessdreamsFDS Newbie26 points27 points28 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
LVW can be lesbians. Just because they’re gay doesn’t mean they’ve worked on the internalized misogyny unfortunately.
[–]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I guess what I am wondering is examples of how you’ve seen it manifest in dating. My limited experience was HVW, but it was just dumb luck. If you don’t mind, I would be greatly appreciative to know what to look for...how it differs from LVM.
[+][deleted] 5 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
[removed]
[–]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Oh wow, thank you, saving this info.
[–]shapelessdreamsFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
No problem. The LGBTQ community still has a long way to go in terms of internalized misogyny. There’s a lot of coddling of LGBTQ men and making so much space for them within our movement, to the detriment and violence of women and non binary people.
Of course things are changing, as our community tends to be more open to change, but old habits die hard.
[–]HmtnswFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Dead.
[–]hiphopanonymous98FDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This!!! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
[–]emtootsFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
And there is no known treatment. I feel like we need a specifically colored women abs month of awareness!
[–]Lizard301FDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Girl, YAAAASSSSSS!
[–]tasdronFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha omg
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[–]girludontbringhomeFDS Newbie202 points203 points204 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]chateauduchatFDS Newbie43 points44 points45 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]MindeskaFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]-badmadAMFDS Apprentice9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]chateauduchatFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 150 points151 points152 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Twolipz_78FDS Newbie88 points89 points90 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]gosamadhiFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]woosawooFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]eatchickpeasFDS Newbie259 points260 points261 points
(10 children) | Copy Link
[–]partypancakesbaconFDS Newbie62 points63 points64 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Optimal_Grapefruit_5FDS Newbie17 points18 points19 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]DaisyDooDropsFDS Newbie33 points34 points35 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 41 points42 points43 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]wrice05FDS Apprentice0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]vntgRN90Throwaway Account20 points21 points22 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]throughalfanoirFDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]vntgRN90Throwaway Account11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 10 points11 points12 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]throughalfanoirFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]99powerFDS Apprentice23 points24 points25 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]fermata102FDS Newbie20 points21 points22 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]desertwildfireFDS Newbie[S] 12 points13 points14 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]libraliaFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]FadeToLifeFDS Newbie54 points55 points56 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]Optimal_Grapefruit_5FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple12 points13 points14 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]shapelessdreamsFDS Newbie26 points27 points28 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple9 points10 points11 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] (2 children) | Copy Link
[removed]
[–]ceramicunicornFDS Disciple2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]shapelessdreamsFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]HmtnswFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]hiphopanonymous98FDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]emtootsFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lizard301FDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]tasdronFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link