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BasieSkanks
[–]Newwavesupport3657FDS Newbie150 points151 points152 points 5 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
Or when you make a joke and everyone laughs so they try and “one up you” are you 7 and insecure dude? Grow up.
[–]lovebun999FDS Newbie118 points119 points120 points 5 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
Run from that man. Run. Run. Run. He sees a competitor in his partner, and will be jealous of every single achievement that is yours. This is the type of man who will deliberately sabotage you- he is that jealous.
Jealousy over success exists even in relationships. I would argue that this form of jealousy is more harmful/alarming than the regular jealousy.
[–]Newwavesupport3657FDS Newbie40 points41 points42 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Oh I’m single af this was a friend but i bounce from those friends too cause I don’t like hanging around insecure guys who act that way.
My brother would act that way and whenever he did I condescended with pet names.
My father would sabotogize me quite literally amd was very infantilizing because he hated his mother and he didn’t want a girl to outshine him.
But I am glad that you said that it makes me more confident that I was right that my fie first relationship was not meant to work out; he wouldn’t do this stuff directly but if I was better at something then him, he would deflate like a balloon.
I always resented this behavior as a kid I would get competitive because of it and liked to one up my brother who acted like this when he was little.
I’ve seen religion perpetuate this a lot; I’m suppose to be worthless without a man via religion, and these men take out their hate and anger because they hate their mothers who they also view as inferior. Some of these men are even violent. They will get scary jealous. There’s the petty baby insecure and then the violent.
I never thought of it as jealousy but it is.
[–]lovebun999FDS Newbie30 points31 points32 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It’s terrifying. I’ve experienced it as well and I agree with you, when these types of men realize they are being outshined and can’t win, they get very angry, angry to the point of violence. They may even pass it off as an “accident” or a joke when they hurt you physically- it is neither...
Your story about making people laugh resonated with me. My one ex would literally attempt to humiliate me after I made the group laugh or said something knowledgeable. I didn’t see what it was for until later, but it really ate at my self esteem.
[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
If I may ask, what did your mom see in him that made her want to be in a relationship and have his kids?
[–]Newwavesupport3657FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That is the biggest mystery to me.
[–]littleredpartydress_FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I didn’t even realize that jealously was a thing in relationships like towards each others achievements. Like what? That’s your girlfriend she got a promotion why are you jealous it’s so bizarre to me
[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
My dad was a jealous insecure monster towards my mom. He wanted to make her look ugly. He cut up her hair many times while she slept. He wouldn’t buy proper clothes for her. She didn’t speak English and was a house wife, so she suffered for years until I became old enough to help her get away from that evil demonic being.
[–]littleredpartydress_FDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Jesus Christ that is absolutely so awful I’m so sorry :(
[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thank you sis 💞
[–]meat_brickFDS Newbie151 points152 points153 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Wish it said "unfounded confidence."
[–]throwthisawayred3FDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
For D4n S4v4g3, it'd be "unfounded confidence in what cis/hetero women want bECauSe i"m A whIte GAY mAn sO I'M alLOwed tO giVe ThIS adVIcE." (Named changed so he can't google himself here.)
He's constantly telling women on his weekly podcast to fuck regardless of emotions and determine "sexual compatibility" and plenty of other bullshit, all from a gay white male perspective. I hate ALL of his advice for women.
For example, in a recent podcast he defended a 21yo man dating a 17yo after the older sister called in saying she wants to stop it. But how could it be exploitative if HE dated a woman in her 20s when he was 15 and didn't think she exploited him, but rather that he exploited HER. SO IT MUST BE THE OKAY BECAUSE THAT'S THE SAME!!!
And that's not even the worst of it. He's mentioned under-aged girls having a "huge rack" and how they should learn sex-ed and sex positivity.
There's so much gross gross ignorance from him. He thinks he's sO PRoGResSIve for being SeX-POSItive and pushing men to find sex-positive porn-loving porn-encouraging women who'd encourage the male partner's kinks. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
I fucking hate him.
[–]TheOGJammiesRuthless Strategist5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
He's going on my "bad sex advice shit list". And you can spell his name out IDGAF if he sees this drag.
[–]throwthisawayred3FDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think he's super dangerous to women cuz he's a white gay and super super progressive, and gets involved with political causes a LOT. Even endorsed at one point by Obama and other celebrities.
It's really hard to point out how insidious his messaging is, because it's wrapped up in some really good feminist messaging.
People take him really seriously.
[–]luna_prismaticFDS Newbie93 points94 points95 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Can you even imagine being raised to believe that you are inherently smarter than an entire half of the population on this Earth? That this was a fact as natural and indisputable as gravity? I don’t even know what that would be like.
[–]InayahDaneenFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I’m so glad I didn’t live back when this was accepted as a fact.
[–]luna_prismaticFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Girl same
[–]LunaValleyFDS Newbie120 points121 points122 points 5 years ago* (8 children) | Copy Link
I was seeing a guy and had my period. I took some painkillers and told him I was in quite a bit of pain and he said:
“Yeah, I don’t get that.”
Me: “What?”
Him: “Surely your body has adapted to the pain by now. It can’t be that sore.”
Me: “Should I kick you in the balls every month and tell you to adapt to that pain?”
Him: “That’s not the same though, your body is built for this”
I asked him not to try “mansplain” my body to me, or tell me what level of pain should be acceptable to me again, and he laughed. Arghhhh!
[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie63 points64 points65 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Laughing at our pain... Unforgivable. And these men wonder why we find them repulsive
[–]LunaValleyFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I actually dumped him later that day, after a string of LVM offences. Lesson learned, next time dump at the first red flag 🤦🏼♀️
[–]Ace-BeeFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So what are his views on people with chronic pain or illnesses? Should they take medication, or should their bodies just adapt ?
[–]littleredpartydress_FDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is where I would’ve got up and left
[–]Cel_GabeFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Guess men's bodies aren't as strong as they project it to be, if women's bodies are "built for this".
What a jackass!
[–]throwthisawayred3FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
should've femme-splained by kicking him in the nuts
What an Azzhole 😳 Glad you dumped him.
[–]loudest_gussetFDS Newbie41 points42 points43 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I love when men try to mansplain a certain tool or product they're using after I literally tell them that I designed the item itself and the machines used to create it.
[–]Teenie34FDS Newbie243 points244 points245 points 5 years ago* (7 children) | Copy Link
I have a master’s degree in a certain field. Recently, a man tried to tell me about topic X. I said he didn’t need to bother to explain X to me since I have a master’s degree in X and many years’ experience in X. As if I’d said nothing, he said, “yeah but...” AND HE KEPT ON MANSPLAINING it. I repeated that I already know everything about what it is and asked what were you going to say about it? As if I said nothing, HE CONTINUED TO MANSPLAIN the definition of X. Their brains produce a chemical that drowns out the sound of our voices.
[–]StrainingMyNeuronsFDS Newbie106 points107 points108 points 5 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
There’s a type of bird, called wood grouse. When it’s singing its mating song, it can’t hear anything else. Or should I say “he”, since it’s the male that does that.
[–]HhjjuuyFDS Apprentice35 points36 points37 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You'd think a mating song would be a turn on.
[–]SearchLightsIncFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lmao - I dont know why we arent memeing this stuff!
[–]FlufferlyFDS Newbie60 points61 points62 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
In return, your brain produces a chemical that makes him invisible for life. I hope.
[–]notochordFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
🤣
[–]hakunnamatatamfsFDS Newbie29 points30 points31 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Their brains produce a chemical that drowns out the sound of our voices.
😂😂😂😂
[–]NeoragoFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All the damn time. I work for a company that is seen as the expert in its field. I get men all the time though telling me their ideas in how to solve the issue. If it could be solved by your one idea there wouldn't be a 200 strong company dedicated to solving it would there?!
[–]aqualily6Pickmeisha™️37 points38 points39 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Female engineer. This happens all the time.
[–]seekingcodingjediThrowaway Account2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
And they never admit they are wrong or they don't know something. Arghh!
[–]aqualily6Pickmeisha™️6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All the sodding time!! The worst one is having spent a week telling the male bosses something is wrong, they only listen when my male colleague says it. If you want to have fun; start saying male engineer or male scientist. Really makes a point!
[–]xxlacey3110xxFDS Newbie34 points35 points36 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’m a licensed cosmetologist and I’m very into beauty things as a hobby. I’ve been in the industry for years... Men will try to tell me they know more about makeup and its affects on skin meanwhile not even having a skincare routine of their own. It always makes me laugh that they think they know more than me about makeup/skin. Men only have the audacity lol
[–]ashwheeeFDS Newbie42 points43 points44 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I work in neurosurgery reading brainwaves for a living.
At my sons birthday party one year, a dad of a kid, who worked from home doing some kind of graphic design work, asked me what I do for a living. When I started explaining, he asked about brain surgery and I explained what I do. He interrupted me to tell me I was wrong about how they do craniotomies because he watched it on a documentary.
I can’t even bring up what I do anymore on dates. I don’t even list it in my profiles
[–]estu0FDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
It’s her nearly empty wine glass for me
[–][deleted] 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
i'm taking this as he was talking so much she had a chance to drink more or drank more because she needed to in order to get through the date lol
[–]estu0FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’m going with the latter
[–]LevelupmamaFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My date this week and also yay to your username lol
[–]soundslikeautumnFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I love the expression on her face like "Great. Here we go again!"
[–]DonDoveFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
God forbid a woman is confident AND has expertise
[–][deleted] 14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think you meant "mansplaining"
[–]the_researcher_Pickmeisha™️7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes, I run into this a lot. I'm right, and I know I'm right, but it just doesn't arrive. So many times at work when I have to withhold the urge to tell everyone I was right. With people outside of work, I'm less hesitant. One thing I often hear is "It doesn't matter if you're right if you can't convince people!" Hello! I've been working here for 7 years!
[–]Ace-BeeFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Aww don't you love it when some random dude tries to mansplain your profession to you? /s
I know an amazing woman who dumbs herself down to make the dude she's with seem smart. Dude runs away with his mouth and creates a mess wherever he goes. Just why.
[–]tauruspiscescancerFDS Disciple6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Unrelated but this is how a lot of the people who aren’t in healthcare / medicine look like when they wanna fight scientists and medical professions about COVID-19.
I’m an epidemiologist and I had some dude argue with me about COVID because he works in construction and he has asthma, but was confident enough to rebuttal every single thing I had to say in our discussion.
[–]throwthisawayred3FDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
That's why you don't get into a discussion with these people in the first place.
[–]tauruspiscescancerFDS Disciple2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I posted on my FB and he decided to comment. I’ll make sure to ignore him and anyone else like him next time 😂
[–]BasieSkanksRuthless Strategist[S] 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
My worst mansplaining stories are as follows:
My ex-FWB tried to tell me how the menstrual cycle worked and wouldn’t listen when I told him he was wrong.
I studied Law at uni and the same ex-FWB was telling me how politics isn’t black-or-white and that many political topics have no “correct” answer.
When I went to pick my ex-FWB up from the train station (which was a two-hour drive each way), he rewarded me by criticising my driving and telling me how I should be driving instead. I told him I would kick him out of the car if he continued.
My brother argued with me over the EU. He said that the bloc is a federation when it isn’t. It’s similar, but it’s not an official federation. My thesis was about EU politics, and I’ve actually read and studied the EU’s major treaties and agreements. He has not.
[–]CassieGreen85FDS Apprentice0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I had a male (of course) friend, do no.1 on me, he'd double and triple down that menstruation happened at exactly 28 days, not more or less, even though I told him I'm literally irregular and went 2 months or 2 weeks between periods. Nope, he insisted that I was wrong (WTF) and that periods were exactly at 28 days.
I'm thankful for his friendship back then in high school, but I'm not sorry to not be in contact with him or that particular group of friends anymore (I only miss the only girl, she's a great gal but she was in that group far longer and I didn't wanna put her in an uncomfortable position. Now we text once in a while though!)
[–]lillythecat0072 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I once went on a date with a guy, who tried to mansplain my PhD research to me because he once read a book about mental health. The trash took itself out, I guess.....
[–]zzeeaa1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
As a woman with a PhD... I relate
:/
[–]bbtexyThrowaway Account1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh, and the pseudo-intellectuals! The “know it all” kinda LVM. They’re just trying to bash us!
[–]BellaMobFDS Apprentice1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I also get a similar response if I mention I play video games. Almost every man immediately thinks it's his duty to recommend games for me without even knowing the genres I like. Like thank you, I am not interested in being told how to do my hobby properly.
[–]throwaway631391220FDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
1.7k upvotes wow! We have a lot of support here💕
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