Does anyone else here who's bisexual just prefer to date guys?

Omnimental · 2012-08-04T18:53:32+00:00

Biological gender is just another variable in the mix. Dating a man over a woman does not promise you a better/easier time. There ARE certain social differences, but I'd say the benefits are about equal to the negatives. A man can be just as shitty of a person as a woman can be, and vis versa.

penikripa · 2012-08-04T17:42:47+00:00

One thing that's not clear to me, did you come up with that list of reasons based on your personal experiences with dating people of both sexes or mrm reads or a mix of both? Come to think of it, I don't remember reading any article or book written by a bi man about the joys of the modern dating scene. It could be an interesting perspective.

chevalier_d_eon · 2012-08-04T17:37:25+00:00

I do think life would be much simpler if I were more into men than women, but unfortunately that's not the case.

sigma89 · 2012-08-04T21:14:10+00:00

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twokidsinamansuit · 2012-08-05T16:44:24+00:00

As a bi guy I do agree with a lot of what you said. Guys are generally easier and more fun to date because they have different expectations than most women do. It's usually more relaxed and the sex is definitely better and more direct. But I will mention that crazy/asshole behavior is not gender specific and the only two people I have been able to truly love have both been women. I have had awesome experiences with women and terrible dramatic experiences with men. Being a shitty partner is more of a personal characteristic and not limited to the sex of the person. That being said, I think social expectations/pressure is the main culprit of why women can be seen as less enjoyable to date than men (to bi guys at least).

dodehoekspiegel · 2012-08-04T17:56:33+00:00

I've been struggling with my heterosexuality for some time, especially when I was in community college where most of the girls just come across as ordinary fuck fodder. No interests except fashion and their looks and a blazing lack of of knowledge about politics, news and the world. If only feminism would fix that problem.

sp8der · 2012-08-04T22:34:57+00:00

They don't give you shit about "being a real man" whatever that fucking means.

They do not always expect you to initiate. They are straight-forward. If they like you, they say so. Rather than saying, "I'm a woman, men should come to me." (Btw, I don't get that. If you wait around to be asked out all the time, you are getting what's given to you, not what you actually want. So again, self-demeaning.)

I talk to them and do not feel like I need to avoid coming off as a "creep." That's a personal issue, but some others may agree.

Objecting to these three. I'm a gay man myself, and I've been out since I was 14 -- 8 years ago.

First one -- yes they absolutely do, and the reverse too. For examples of not being manly enough, see the majority of http://www.douchebagsofgrindr.com/ , where hordes upon hordes of douchebags gleefully state NO FEMS or vitriolic variations thereof. On the flipside, there are those who hate manly men because they feel they don't make any effort on their appearance at all. Then there are wildcards like myself with no affinity to either camp and an inclination to stay away from both.

The second -- and I'll admit it's mostly femgays that violate this one -- it does happen. It's a LOT less common than in women, yes, but you do get those that prefer to be chased, see going after someone as demeaning, and often react like women (valuing emotion over logic) to events.

As for the third, older gay men can be really creepy towards the younger ones. You don't have to worry about it in your own age group, but try to date younger and you'll get labelled a creep very quickly, and not, I confess I must admit, without good reason. I've been on the receiving end of it and I just... I don't want to talk about it.

There are also a lot of drawbacks to being in a homoromantic relationship. Sometimes even the act of holding your boyfriend's hand in public will cause people to flash you looks of disgust or sling snide comments toward you. Hospital visitation rights for homosexual couples are non-existant depending on where you live, and there's always the marriage issue.

And not to sound like a hateful person, but due to the especial hypersexuality of young gay men, they're very hard to trust in a monogamous relationship. This might speak volumes about me, but... I don't feel fidelity is very important to the younger gay crowd. I feel old writing that, I'm only 22, but I like to think I am more mature than the average.

C0CKPUNCHER · 2012-08-04T19:38:29+00:00

I've dated men and women. Men were a lot easier and fairer.

rightsbot · 2012-08-04T17:30:17+00:00

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Wordshark · 2012-08-04T22:40:38+00:00

I would add to that list:

•You don't have to explain to men that "no means no for men too."

Three times, I've had women push past the point where I'm saying, "no, seriously, I don't want to." I've never had a man do that. They might get petulant, pout, even call me nasty names, but every one of them knew that you don't cross the physical touch barrier once consent is withdrawn. Three times with three separate women, it went past the point where I would have had to use force to stop them. Once, I did use force, pulled her off me and held her down and talked loudly in her face, and the other two times, I chose not to. One attempted rape and two rapes.

None of them were bad people. After each event, we had serious, uncomfortable conversations. It had just never occurred to them that women can rape men, and that it is a bad thing. You don't run into this problem with men. Yeah, sometimes guys rape guys, but they know the rules and are choosing to break them.

Also,

They are better in bed.

is mostly true, at first anyway. After a long-term, healthy sexual relationship, with open communication—and lots of practice ;)—women can be just as good.

I still prefer long-term relationships with women though. I don't have a rationalization for it, it's just what I prefer.

blitz_omlet · 2012-08-05T01:21:56+00:00

I'm gay but I have a lot of straight friends who've said that they want to date me for just the above reasons.

Mixed feelings!

MockingDead · 2012-08-05T05:26:43+00:00

I'm a Kinsey 2, I wish I were a 3.

chevalier_d_eon · 2012-08-05T09:55:33+00:00

Now we're on a downvote radar: http://www.reddit.com/r/TheTransphobiaSquad/comments/xpel9/in_rmenrights_i_dont_even_i_have_decided_to_date/

kruiseKontrol · 2012-08-09T21:01:13+00:00

I agree with what you're saying. In particular, I find guys under around 23 to be THE sexiest of all types of people (ages/genders), I just love their fresh-faced look and their energy. Also, a bi 'mens-rights-aware' guy of that age would be the ultimate in hotness and good relationship material. So basically, yeah you guys are 'the shit'!

(Im bi, MRA, mid-30s)

r_rships_account · 2012-12-02T04:49:02+00:00

There are so many advantages to this that it's hard to keep track of them all. Here's a start:

there is no expectation of marriage-slavery
there is no risk of "surprise" children
you are dealing with a real grown-up, not a child
there is much less likelihood of a victim-mentality
they understand your anatomy better
they have a higher sex-drive
they are generally not narcissistic princesses
as a group, bisexual men tend to be a bit more open-minded than the average Joe, or average Jane

chevalier_d_eon · 2012-08-04T17:56:12+00:00

I am a cross-dresser and I have been bisexual at times. Since the loss of my last girlfriend (which was a fucking nightmare) I have decided to date good looking trans-girls, who often look better, sexier and hotter than conventional women without any of the hassle. A blowjob is always a blowjob.

Hamakua · 2012-08-04T17:56:06+00:00

You participate in the conglomerate of subreddits called ShitRedditSays.

AndIMustScream · 2012-08-04T19:23:31+00:00

[permanently deleted]

beniro · 2012-08-04T18:27:31+00:00

This crap has no place on this subreddit.

Title	Does anyone else here who's bisexual just prefer to date guys?
Author	sigma89
Upvotes	6
Comments	138
Date	August 4, 2012 5:28 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/xoe45/does_anyone_else_here_whos_bisexual_just_prefer/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/does-anyone-else-here-whos-bisexual-just-prefer-to.1016539 https://theredarchive.com/post/1016539

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