Do incels really exist?

f3yleaf · 2015-09-14T15:40:48+00:00

I "cured" two friends who were incel's, its a very real thing, and its usually pretty intelligent guys who are stuck in a "should" mentality, as in girls should like me for who I am, girls should be attracted to intelligence, sophistication and things that are good for society, I should never ever make girls feel uncomfortable etc.

Most are just misled by mainstream "romance" bullshit and are too nice for their own good I think.

The cure in the two cases I have experience with was hitting the gym and adopting a more entitled/selfish mindset, and learning basic game principles, one of them went from skinny acne ridden nerd to aggressive scumbag player making out with strangers on the dancefloor and in some cases trying to seduce drunk girls in front of their less masculine boyfriends for fun(im quite proud of him).

ProtoPill · 2015-09-14T14:25:56+00:00

A lot of the issue is that men don't match up to the women of their "percentile". A 50th percentile man isn't good enough for a 50th percentile woman. When a man who keeps himself healthy, has an education, reads some books, and has decent social skills has to settle for an intolerable hambeast with stds, it's sufficient to just call him an incel. His dilemma is similar to the middle class family who can't afford to spend any significant amount of university but who doesn't qualify for any need-based aid.

Cyralea · 2015-09-14T14:44:06+00:00

Yes incels exist. Women generally don't have a variety of sexual tastes like men do. Find any type of woman and there is a man who will tap that. However, it's not the same for men. If a man is unattractive to attractive women then that is going to be the case in general.

I have to say I am an exception when it comes to most women. I have an east asian omega male fetish. I also like men with beta personality traits. I have an OK face but my body and teeth are busted so I would put myself at an HB4. However even if I was hotter I would still love asian men. I am not attracted to anything else and people on here often accuse me of being a troll. My husband was incel (apart from hookers) before we met.

nicethingyoucanthave · 2015-09-14T14:38:40+00:00

Even if you were fat and repulsive, surely there's a girl out there

There are a lot more fat and repulsive people than there are "girls out there."

Here's something we don't talk about much - "game" (that is, competition between males for women) is kind of zero-sum. A male who improves himself is improving himself relative to other males. The total amount of sex (from women) remains pretty constant. That means that when that male gets more sex, someone else is necessarily getting less.

Consider this thought experiment: choose 100 of the most attractive heterosexual males on Earth. Drop them on a desert island with 100 randomly chosen women. I strongly suspect that at least one of those males is going to lock down two women into an exclusive (for the women) relationship.

Assuming none of the men are similarly willing to share (and that's a valid assumption), that necessarily means that one of those guys just became incel. A guy who never wanted for feminine attention out in the real world is, because of the circumstances, alone. LOL.

wtknight · 2015-09-14T17:10:20+00:00

If your body is crap and your personality is also crap then you are probably an incel, and I have known guys like this in real life. Another type of incel are the Elliott Rodgers of the world, who are not unattractive, but have underlying psychological issues like severe social anxiety and narcissism that prevent them from ever being able to form a connection with anybody of the opposite sex.

grendalor · 2015-09-14T14:42:08+00:00

Sure they exist. Part of the reason is that a good number of people of both sexes who are unattractive themselves prefer to be alone than to be with another person who is unattractive. Just how human preferences work.

Whisper · 2015-09-14T21:36:59+00:00

Not only do they exist, most of them are neither fat nor repulsive.

You are obviously a woman, because every man knows the answer to this question.

dakru · 2015-09-14T14:24:44+00:00

Even if you were fat and repulsive, surely there's a girl out there, perhaps even some pretty good looking ones, who have a fetish for that kind of thing.

I actually think that the old feel-good ideas like "there's someone out there for everyone" are technically true, but very misleading. Yes, given a large enough population, there's probably at least one person out there who's attracted to "undesirable trait X".

What relevance does that have, though, when these people are vastly outnumbered by the people who actually have "undesirable trait X"? Only a small percentage of the people with "undesirable trait X" are going to be able to pair up with them (how small the percentage is depends on what trait we're talking about).

max_peenor · 2015-09-14T15:19:46+00:00

surely there's a girl out there,

Perhaps in an age where men were taught to be masculine and weren't obese blobs. Given some of the submissive land whales I see these days, I honestly don't blame women that would rather be in a harem than commit to one of these. It's almost like asking them to mate with another species. Ick.

ExpendableOne · 2015-09-14T16:22:35+00:00

I've met plenty of incels in my life time that were neither fat or repulsive, and the vast majority of men that I have met were extremely limited in terms of sexual choices(like, maybe a handle of genuine opportunities a year). Whether or not there are women out there who are attracted to fat/repulsive men is kind of besides the point, because those women will very seldom actually try to pursue those men. Men are expected to do a lot to impress women, and to basically have all the necessary knowledge and know-how to woo and bed them beforehand. An average or even decent looking man will still end up an incel if he doesn't live up to the expectations women impose on them. Basically, if they don't have game, women will just not bother with them(even if it would be in their best interest to do so). Women, on the other hand, can find themselves sexual partners with no such expectations placed on them, because they are women.

wazzup987 · 2015-09-14T16:46:54+00:00

sort of. the genetically deformed, the mentally retarded, some times the clinically insane.

but for most quote unquote incels its either social skills, standards, or a lack of fucks given about looks.

i feel forthem but only they can free them selves.

[deleted] · 2015-09-14T15:50:08+00:00

I dunno. I saw a really, really fat guy today working at the convenience store. At one point he squatted down for something and I saw an enormous plumber crack ~~peaking out~~ fighting to get out like an Alien in your stomach. Physically unattractive, low income... not sure how many women would go for that.

Carkudo · 2015-09-14T16:35:47+00:00

surely there's a girl out there

Is that what argument boils down to? "I'm right because surely I'm right"?

I'm 31 and not even that physically repulsive. I look fat, have an ugly face and bad skin, am overall unmasculine and have a weird body shape. Also, no redeeming features. And a tiny dick, but that's kinda moot anyway. I've searched far and wide and at 31 my best achievements are a hooker who was so disgusted with me that I couldn't get it up and a girl who led me on because she thought I was asexual and wanted to pat her self-esteem by making me fall in love with her.

No, there ain't no fetish for pudgy ugly weaklings with massive sacks of loose skin.

[deleted] · 2015-09-14T17:10:17+00:00

I don't think the one chick with a fetish for neckbeards is going to have enough stamina to satisfy millions of them.

[deleted] · 2015-09-15T06:20:41+00:00

Go to /r/foreveralone and see for yourself.

Drenzard · 2015-09-14T14:43:35+00:00

The problem really has very little to do with physical appearance, because in most cases (unless you're unlucky enough to have facial deformities etc) that can be fixed with effort.

The real problem is a lack of social skills and a shitty attitude, where they had bad luck in the past or simply take TRP's view of women as gospel and now cannot be bothered to improve themselves as a result, but simultaneously feel lonely and desire relationships.

These two issues are what cause the bad physical appearance in the first place, they go way deeper than a lack of sex, and they require a lot more than an internet board if they're to be fixed.

Rufus_Reddit · 2015-09-14T14:22:46+00:00

Do you really think that everyone on /r/foreveralone is there voluntarily?

[deleted] · Mon Sep 14 14:09:16 2015 UTC

[permanently deleted]

myrddit · 2015-09-14T14:43:45+00:00

it's pretty easy if you live in a tiny college town where 80% of the student population is male.

if half the girls are taken by guys, then 10% of the students are single girls and 70% of the students are single guys.

It sucks but it's not enough of a reason to change schools for me

[deleted] · 2015-09-14T16:17:56+00:00

What is Forever alone? What is Wizardchan? What is Sluthate?

Problem on these guys is generally a combination of ugliness/social autism which make them unattractive to girls, sometimes even to other people.

The involuntary is generally self-sustaining, because after being burned enough times , the guy will go monk, so no more tentatives.

As for the "fetish" side , it's a question of supply and demand. Ugly nerds are too numerous for them to have a good chance to get someone if they don't improve.

TheSonofLiberty · 2015-09-14T21:09:19+00:00

Its simple evolutionary theory that there is differential levels of success between the genders of animals. Typically, it is the males that have high variation in success (some very low/none, many middle, some high/very high) and the females have low variation (i.e. most reproduce successfully with only very few having no success).

Why would human sexual behavior be any different?

terminator3456 · 2015-09-14T14:57:05+00:00

Don't use that word too much....or you'll summon HIM.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2015-09-14T16:08:08+00:00

No they dont. Everyone of them could take the money they spend on everything else and get a nice GFE every friday night, it would be good and good for them. they are the male equivalent of picky spinsters "if its not EXACTLY how i imagine it to be it doesnt count"

[deleted] · 2015-09-14T17:33:29+00:00

If you are a sub 5 male, there really isn't a league for you anymore. It's more like a mad dash to the bottom. As a result, many men get left with nothing.

17b29a · 2015-09-14T14:20:00+00:00

I think they just want attention.

prodigy2throw · 2015-09-14T16:36:00+00:00

Everybody's gotta have a dream, right?

alreadyredschool · 2015-09-14T17:58:30+00:00

Is it possible that the amount of fat guys is bigger than the amount of women with a fat fetish?

winterrider · 2015-09-15T19:28:55+00:00

You are obviously a woman and a stupid one at that. They do exist and in many cases they are neither fat nor ugly. Often they are attractive and successful but have no idea how to attract and keep women.

StabbyPants · 2015-09-16T02:28:35+00:00

so, do you mean men who can't get any action, or men who can't get action from women they find attraction, assuming somewhat reasonable standards?

machimus · 2015-09-14T16:43:04+00:00

Yes, but I hate the term "incel" because it implies that they're victims of some kind of global conspiracy to cockblock them.

It's like someone who complains that they're starving to death but they won't jump a reasonable fence to get to the apple orchard they're standing next to, and they won't take anything but the best apples. They definitely refuse to do the hard work to climb a tree to get at the best ones like the rest of us.

And god forbid you suggest one of the slightly scuffed but perfectly edible ones, they just shout that the perfect ones should fly over the fence into their mouth, and resume complaining how hungry they are.

Doldenberg · 2015-09-14T18:08:23+00:00

Lets start with the fact that the very word incel is very confusing. "Involuntary celibate" is an oxymoron, because celibacy is implicitly voluntary. If you simply don't have sex without having sworn to be celibate, you're merely a virgin. But "I'm a virgin" doesn't carry the same amount of self-pity, and asking "Do virgins exist" would obviously be a very dumb question. But we already know that manospherians and RedPillers love redefining stuff and making up words to support their ideology, so lets not bother.

Second point would be, lets question the "involuntary" part here. Because even in this very thread you already see Terps redefining - you see the pattern - it to mean that yes, you do technically have options, but you decide against them. Which, well, is sort of the definition of voluntary. Now obviously, deciding who you have sex with is not a bad thing, not at all. But declaring that "those options don't count" when the question is "Do you have ANY options?" is kind of dishonest. Just look at the top post:

My husband was incel (apart from hookers) before we met.

This is essentially like the pregnant girl insisting she's a virgin. It's like the catholic girlfriend who only does anal. It is, quite literally, a man who never had sex except when he did.

So the third thing is, do virgins exist. Yes, obviously. Are there people who are virgins for very long or even for their whole life - without suffering premature death - yes, obviously, there are as well. Has every single one of those people decided to not have any sex in general? No, probably not. But we know from statistics that there is an incredibly low percentage of them, so while we can say that indeed, there are people who will never have sex despite wanting to, its not even close to the wide-spread phenomenon the Internet tries to make it.

vinegarbubblegum · 2015-09-14T14:53:57+00:00

someone around here pointed out Aesop's Fox and Grape Fable the other day (i forget why) and I think it explains a lot of about Incels.

Firstly, Yes they do exist, but why? Go back to the Fox and The Grape.

Fox wants grapes. Sees grapes. Grapes behind barrier. Fox can't figure out how to overcome the barrier and eventually skulks away.

Did the fox admit he's not capable of obtaining this particular set of grapes? Hell no. Fox convinced himself the grapes were undesirable and that, in fact, he was never interested in them to begin with.

Fox is the incel, grapes are girls.

[deleted] · 2015-09-14T20:54:07+00:00

INCEL LIVES MATTER!!

I will not stop fighting until every candidate running declares "Incel lives matter!" "Incel lives matter!"

Title	Do incels really exist?
Author	thats_not_what_i_hea
Upvotes	7
Comments	135
Date	September 14, 2015 2:08 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/3kwtmn/do_incels_really_exist/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-incels-really-exist.279621 https://theredarchive.com/post/279621

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