What is the driving force behind most couples being looksmatched ?

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-03-27T21:22:50+00:00

Because relationships rarely work outside of looksmatch. It's as simple as that.

MrMushySauce · 2022-03-27T23:13:00+00:00

Have you ever gone to a store as a kid and your mom told you that you could only spend $10? So, what do you do? You look for the best thing you can get that will cost you $10.

Now imagine instead of your mom it's the world and instead of $10 it's your SMV package and instead of the store it's dating.

This is why most couples looksmatch.

caption291 · 2022-03-27T22:27:34+00:00

The differences in attractiveness between like a 5 and a 7 is really not that big especially when you consider that subjectivity plays some role, so It's not that hard to see a 5 and a 7 and just kind of go "yep, they are both sixes".

I also think that people overestimate women/underestimate men meaning that some guy could be in the top 20% of attractiveness and be with a girl in the top 50% of attractiveness and people will not see it as a mismatch. Although, I wouldn't be surprised if this was just a long term consequence of the first point.

So I don't necessarily agree that couples are actually looksmatched in the first place, it just feels like it.

PaidByPutinBot123 · 2022-03-27T22:54:59+00:00

IDK ive always been .more attractive than all my girlfriends.

glowupresearch · 2022-03-27T23:38:19+00:00

I think you're taking looks being subjective a little too far. People have preferences/types, but they rarely depart from the health + youth + genetically fit equation that adds up to objective beauty. People are very good at recognizing objective beauty, even if its largely subconscious and they aren't sure exactly what is contributing to making someone attractive.

Basically people look for someone whose their type, but also as objectively attractive as possible, so they will usually still wind up with their "looksmatch".

Prize-Thought-4205 · 2022-03-28T03:59:21+00:00

uhh... biology & science?

I don't know why people on this subreddit try to ignore the facts & science on all this stuff that has already been done decades ago lol.

People are naturally more attracted to others who look similar to them, in the opposite sex.

This means that the whole value system, a women being 9/10 in terms of what society loves... is nothing to a man compared to an attractive women that has the same features as him but she's a women (& the equivalent feminine features) facial shape & similar eyes, nose, head shape etc. Everything, these are the people who are found to have the strongest sexual tension between each other.

Looks match have always been & still are the most successful forms of relationships in the long term.

This is why its dangerous for men to try & heavily pursue girls they consider a lot hotter than them... or girls they are not too attracted to but want easy sex from.

And lets be real, most men go for the hottest girls because of ego & some deeper insecurities or past trauma, or maybe just FOMO, not because they want a serious long term relationship with any of them its just a deep desire of conquest & not feeling like they couldn't do it.

Relationships need mutual respect, very high levels of mutual attraction & desire, & equality, compromise, trust etc. All of this is easiest with a looks matched human.

Over_North8884 · 2022-03-28T05:39:15+00:00

Because it's a market. It's the same reason why you don't see old Ford Pintos sell for $100k or new Lamborghini Aventadors sell for $10k.

flamingoinghome · 2022-03-28T10:09:59+00:00

You all probably won't like or believe this, but whatever:

It's because most of what we call "looks" isn't determined by raw physical stock the way many on this sub pretend.

Say a girl is really into fitness and in great shape, and she hangs out at the gym all the time, and her favorite restaurant is a really bougie place that does bottomless brunch, and she styles her hair and does full makeup every single day? That stuff is going to be reflected in how she presents, and what she looks like.

She's also going to want a guy who lives and thinks like her--so, a ripped guy who goes to the gym, drinks protein shakes, wears preppy athleisure, has a crew of guys to play Madden or watch football games with, etc.

These two will look "matched" not because they literally look alike, but because they lead similar lives, which both shows in how they look, and makes them compatible.

Lather, rinse, and repeat for most couples in general.

Consumer31314 · 2022-03-27T21:27:03+00:00

Neither side wants to feel like they settled or are being settled for. Being in that situation makes for a great deal of insecurity. Make attractiveness isn’t as determined on looks though so this can also factor by status and what not.

cvslengthbucketlist · 2022-03-27T21:34:20+00:00

Is it because guys don’t approach women more attractive than them for whatever reason but they possibly have a chance ?

That's one reason, lack of confidence in men is correlated with the idea that a woman is "out of your league" so there's no point in trying. The couples you meet where there's a discrepancy in looks include as a subset the minority of guys who are willing to take risks and pursue someone they would likely get rejected by.

skunkbear444 · 2022-03-28T05:34:21+00:00

1 point apart is semi common, no one asks questions

2 points apart is fairly rare people would probably guess things like "she must give great head and a great personality" if she is the lesser looking one or "he must have money, or an amazing personality" if he is the lesser looking one

3 points apart is super rare and if the woman is better looking people think "he must have lots of money or drugs she partakes in" or other way around "that guy has really low self esteem, a weird kink, or she got fat and he must believe in death til you part at all costs".

People looksmatch because not looksmatching causes negative attention from outside the relationship that you can either feel from dealing with people or you get the consistent jokes or people straight up ask why are you with him/her?

ruboyuri · 2022-03-28T23:22:35+00:00

The ability to compare and contrast that most social animals have

januaryphilosopher · 2022-03-27T22:13:13+00:00

Women want the best they can get and men want the best they can get, roughly equal numbers in the dating outfit means that they balance each other out. There are some couples that aren't roughly looksmatched but it doesn't really lean one way or another.

Friedidli · 2022-03-28T01:11:12+00:00

Because the ratio of men to women is roughly the same.

Go anywhere where the ratio is more women than men, the women are always at the top of their game looks wise.

AutoModerator · 2022-03-27T20:00:24+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-03-27T23:54:23+00:00

Knowing your league and not wanting to be alone

sarkington · 2022-03-28T00:36:09+00:00

Social awareness

OraleEse13 · 2022-03-28T07:07:47+00:00

Depends. If looks are what you strive for then you'll aim as high as you can. If other factors important to you then you may be willing to go a point or two down. I'd rather have a sweet, kind, and agreeable 6 than a bitchy 8-9 that's always complaining. People are a package consisting of many different attributes and you should take in the whole.

TryLambda · 2022-03-28T09:01:30+00:00

Because women are shallow, and care more about what some random person thinks of their relationship than the person they are intimately involved in?

Bandit174 · 2022-03-28T12:53:15+00:00

Even if its subjective there's still a strong overlap in what we collectively consider attractive or unnatractive. Its not subjective in the sense that our attraction is random or equally distributed among the different physical types.

Even if women find most men unnatractive there's still a gradient to how unnatractive they perceive different men to be. If most women find most men unnatractive it just mens most womens looksmatch is an unnatractive man. There's not enough of the hot guys for all women to get one so the women who want to have kids and raise them in a two parent dual income household will settle for a man they aren't very attracted to.

kartu3 · 2022-03-28T13:16:09+00:00

Common diet and common takes on sports activities.

Title	What is the driving force behind most couples being looksmatched ?
Author	According_Ladder_411
Upvotes	12
Comments	64
Date	March 27, 2022 8:00 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/tprv5f/what_is_the_driving_force_behind_most_couples/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-is-the-driving-force-behind-most-couples.1109954 https://theredarchive.com/post/1109954

Comments