Does anyone else have this problem of wanting a dependable partner, but being insanely attracted to the complete opposite?

mediocre000 · 2020-10-08T14:08:13+00:00

This looks like the perfect example of what we are discussing here

biccat · 2020-10-08T14:15:19+00:00

Sounds a lot like the Stanford marshmallow experiment that looked at the ability of children (ages 3-5) to delay gratification now in exchange for a higher reward later.

It's unfortunate, but not surprising, that this 40 year old woman has less capacity to delay gratification than 3-5 year old children.

iwanttheblanketback · 2020-10-08T14:23:12+00:00

That's what happens when you practice {promiscuous} mating patterns. They become ingrained and nearly impossible to break. Females destroy the oxytocin receptors when practicing promiscuous behavior.

adriannmng · 2020-10-08T14:15:09+00:00

Another thot that thinks tingles are needed in order to be able to breathe. And it doesn't matter if you look good, if your texts are mundane then no tingles. And for her any texting not involving some sort of pornography is mundane.

In a few years the pump and dump will dry as well and then it will be waatgm. As for her last question, yeah, about all the women on this sub have the exact same problem

AlextheHun24 · 2020-10-08T14:11:34+00:00

A beggar upset that nobody will give her money. It's pathetic.

NovaSociete · 2020-10-08T14:45:09+00:00

Why are Western women so deluded? No reasonable man with honour would value and invest in an easy fuckable whore.

2020-10-08T14:12:16+00:00

Another women chasing the purple dragon tingles.

mr_kuk · 2020-10-08T15:06:13+00:00

The problem with women is that they are still attracted to the type of guys that would have been a good catch if we were still living as hunters and gatherers. The Chad's probably would have been great at running down a woolly mammoth but they aren't so successful in the modern world. So the guys that give them the tingles don't satisfy her hypergamous need for status and resources.

But to women feelings always take precedence over facts and logic. She knows logically that the guy with the neck tattoos and a prison record is a bad choice but she can't help herself because of how he makes her feel.

I am not sure that there is really anything that can be done for them. It's a simple matter of women not being equipped to make the correct choices in their own lives.

Galaxystream-1 · 2020-10-08T14:57:26+00:00

If she is 40yrs old she still as not figured it out yet she never will. She only as a few yrs left before the men stop knocking.

You get what you deserve she is not looking for a good man. She wants to turn a hyena into a poodle 😂

3HardWay · 2020-10-08T14:20:13+00:00

I know fried ice is rare, but I like to hear myself talk and need validation, so I will drone on about it anyway.

lorum_ipsum_dolor · 2020-10-08T14:45:43+00:00

[deleted]

SkylordAl · 2020-10-08T16:22:28+00:00

To answer the original post's question:

Nothing is wrong with "nice guys"

To her point, "nice guys" and "good men" are indeed boring.

However, they are boring because they are consistent, particularly with family-building behavior, which is why they are deemed "good/nice" in the first place.

But here's what she and probably most modern women is this:

The only reason why she and modern women in general find "nice guys" boring is because we are living in an era of relative opulence, where they can afford to see consistent, family-building behavior and tendencies displayed by "nice guys" and "good men" as boring.

MeaslesPlease · 2020-10-08T14:44:15+00:00

Tbh tho I get why they don't wanna be with a simp that'll do anything for them. Imagine having kids with a doormat. Especially one that would be that way for any girl. It's on the same level as wifing a used up thot. I always make girls work for my attention and validation, how it should be. Maybe talk to them once a day.

shrinkshooter · 2020-10-08T15:27:05+00:00

Their instincts and innate biological programming are their own worst enemy. They never go for dependable and stable providers unless they have no options (and sometimes not even then), because they're simply not attracted to them. They just don't want them. The worst part isn't that this is the truth, it's that they refuse to accept the consequences of this "decision." Or they don't even realize it until it's too late.

Would you ever want a woman to be with you when she absolutely has no desire for you and you simply serve as some utility for her? No. I'd be far more angry at a woman being duplicitous about this than I would about Mother Nature being a cunt and implanting these instincts in her.

To an extent I feel a bit bad about this situation: imagine having no desire for anything other than what is going to be bad for you 95% of the time. That's gonna fucking suck. You either go for that thing, and it has negative results, or you don't go for that thing, and you feel miserable. Imagine you're some dude who is only attracted to psychotic, crazy strippers and you have zero desire for anyone else. You are going to have one disastrous future, either you're sticking your dick in crazy or you're feeling isolated and sexually frustrated.

b_a_d_r0b0t · 2020-10-08T14:56:06+00:00

Alpha widowed is upset she can’t get commitments from Chad at 40.

asdf333aza · 2020-10-08T16:16:30+00:00

This is why you need to work on yourself kings. Don't chase women, chase success. The BEST revenge is usually being successful while those who tried to impede you fail in life. Your revenge is your success.

Most modernized women are self-destructive. Your grandmas and mothers most likely didn't suffer from this as things were different back then and women were under control and contributing members of society.. Nowadays they're wild, fucking, twerking, pro-sluttong, ig thotting, sjw wanna be feminist. They are incredibly self destructive and will ruin their own lives with time. Just focus on achieving excellence and they will fall with time.

wesborlandisagod5 · 2020-10-08T16:52:26+00:00

Imagine fucking nothing but model bitches for over 20 years.

Their personalies are vapid and horrible but man are they good in bed!.

So you're finally 30 and you're just tired of having meaningless conversations with vapid hoes. someone interesting is so much fun. So you find this slim cute accountant, she is so modest, dresses nice and is sooooo!!! In love with you. She is also very domestic. Her ass might not be as big but she loves cooking for you.

Dont sound too bad "does it?"

.

I dont give a fuck; about her complains

BluepillProfessor · 2020-10-08T14:37:59+00:00

So close. Yet so far.

p_and_q · 2020-10-08T16:27:32+00:00

A women in her 40s who's still "slutting around" isn't looking for an LTR, she's looking for a retirement plan.

AntoniusAmbrosium · 2020-10-08T16:00:38+00:00

I understand the need block out the person's info but with posts like this, the gold is in the comments

Ipride362 · 2020-10-08T15:21:16+00:00

Wants to tingle, but sad she single

Celticpenguin85 · 2020-10-08T16:31:38+00:00

Straight from the horse's mouth but when men point out the obvious we're just angry incels who hate women and our small penises.

A_Walt_Whitman · 2020-10-08T16:46:08+00:00

40 years old and still can't get off the carousel LOL

tosernameschescksout · 2020-10-08T16:58:40+00:00

Validation of our entire body of knowledge and all of our theories. There it is.

I wish we knew some kind of solution other than just going MGTOW. Really, there's no winners in this scenario. Good men get treated like shit. Women, who have the capacity to change, don't.

Mundane_Worldliness7 · 2020-10-08T14:58:25+00:00

Totally missing is the concept of trade-offs. Often times the dependable traits and Chad-type traits aren’t found in the same guy, thus often times women have to trade off tingles for reliability. As for that small batch of Chad-type guys that also have the dependable traits, this women clearly doesn’t have the juice to get them.

fagt69 · 2020-10-08T19:18:10+00:00

"it's just so much fun!". And this mentality is why they'll never learn. The wall then hits and there's nothing but an empty black pit inside - because all they've done is had fun

WaitingForWormwood · 2020-10-09T00:14:37+00:00

She literally has no control over her own holes. This entire post is her saying she can’t help it, she can’t stop fucking. We let these people vote.

tmattm · 2020-10-08T22:24:42+00:00

Usually women “get more mature” in their early thirties and want a “good man”. But not this one. She just can’t stop riding the cc with 40. Is this sad or honest from her side?

Banincoming · 2020-10-08T23:45:48+00:00

40 years old, still unable to control the urge to shove every pile of trash she sees into her vagina.

mirrormantra · 2020-10-09T08:34:21+00:00

Quintissential WhereAreAllTheGoodMen

'I know there are good men, in fact I've met them, but I just don't feel anything for them? Ideally I'd like the qualities of a good man, but also the qualities of Chad who treats me like shit. I know these men are rare though.'

Yeah no shit. You literally want it to be daytime and nighttime at the SAME time. Absolutely unbelievable.

Anyone else just find it sad how predictable this female behaviour has become in the 21st century? It's literally textbook stuff. Makes me feel so hopeless. It's as if people are just meat robots driven by pre-destined code.

Think-notlikedasheep · 2020-10-08T16:55:11+00:00

That's because science says that the birth control pill causes women to choose the wrong men.

https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/news/20080812/bad-sex-pill#1

meerita · 2020-10-08T17:13:53+00:00

She's the typical pump and dump woman i do once a month.

MGTOWManofMystery · 2020-10-08T18:06:00+00:00

Hypergamy and Hybristophilia don't care.

Drp345 · 2020-10-08T20:29:56+00:00

Years of feminism and riding the CC. That'll do it.

GoodBoi_JStack · 2020-10-08T21:31:05+00:00

Even when they know the tingles are poison, they still can’t quit.

silly_birb · 2020-10-08T22:29:35+00:00

Of someone is unreliable in relationship he's also unreliable at work.

Now guess which behavior gives you a career and a stable job.
Your company wants reliable people, unless they are in the etertainment industry.

RedPill_Dragon · 2020-10-09T00:52:08+00:00

Can't pair bond.

She is cat food.

SupremeWaifu69 · 2020-10-09T05:17:39+00:00

Female here. I don’t usually comment on this sub but I have this exact problem as this person. Last year I found myself in a pattern of going after toxic men which would leave me frustrated and in pain. It wasn’t like there wasn’t nice guys, there was a few good-meaning men in my life but I simply didn’t want to be with them because they were nice and that kind of really fucked with me. I simply didn’t find them attractive no matter how attractive they looked. I swore I’m not getting into any more shitty relationships or even sleep with anyone until I break this pattern. I’ve since been celibate for about a year now and haven’t been really talking to anyone on a romantic level. The good thing is that I’m 20 and still young so I’m trying my best to unlearn this behaviour before it sabotages my life and I find myself in seriously abusive relationships with skewed power dynamics.

I kind of realised a lot of it stemmed from my upbringing, my body image and because the girls around me naturally wanted these men so therefore I wanted them too. Currently just focusing on myself, my career and unlearning my toxic behaviours and patterns that attract toxic men and simultaneously make me crave for toxic men, if that makes sense. Way I view it now is that my future self in 2-3 years will thank me later because I’ll be able to recognise good potential partners and also be deserving of them at the same time.

12112019 · 2020-10-08T16:14:27+00:00

Textbook example

FranticFlounder · 2020-10-08T16:20:28+00:00

Retardation

RedditAdminsRCunts66 · 2020-10-08T16:48:53+00:00

Diagnosis: Damaged Goods!!

Avoid

Thor-Loki-1 · 2020-10-08T18:55:30+00:00

She will die alone, surrounded by cats.

Norman_T_Chadlite · 2020-10-08T19:44:50+00:00

Bitch needs a tingles 12 step program.

goldenbadger299 · 2020-10-08T22:38:11+00:00

I hope she stays alone for saying that. You’re not even thinking about your future at that point. It’s like you’re just trying to fool around. But you claim you still want that dependable aspect. She’s trying to build a bf 💀💀

uebermacht · 2020-10-08T23:46:56+00:00

Classic Alpha Widow

trematar · 2020-10-09T03:09:33+00:00

She's going to die alone, plain and simple lol

Brainiarc7 · 2020-10-09T08:47:05+00:00

Well, this is perfect summary of what this subreddit covers.

These men dodged a bullet with this one.

Ishabaka · 2020-10-09T16:45:39+00:00

A single 40f on the path to being a single 80f.

Roachcluster · 2020-10-10T11:41:54+00:00

How exactly would you know better when your whole life the only thing you have learned is how to make one shitty decision after another?

wathon2 · 2020-10-11T00:54:54+00:00

no further proof needed that promiscuity ruined women.

PHUCK_THE_HIVE · 2020-10-12T07:44:10+00:00

Women want contradictions in all forms but are too dumb themselves to see the contradictions....ugh so frustrating.

Massacher · 2020-10-16T02:21:01+00:00

The problem is she has zero value. She hit the wall hard and is now clueless as to why no man wants her. She should have been looking for a LTR at 20 at the absolute latest.

jihocech · 2020-10-08T14:29:33+00:00

Anyone interested in Latin here? Lets use the word "triarius" for those CC veterans.

V8_Only · 2020-10-08T17:05:16+00:00

Larp

SuperJo64 · 2020-10-08T17:27:16+00:00

All that just to say you like getting used and abuse.

Texan2116 · 2020-10-08T22:17:14+00:00

Man, I wanted to see the reactions from the original..

kyledontcare · 2020-10-08T22:20:47+00:00

Alpha widowed from an early age.

Jeviok · 2020-10-09T03:46:20+00:00

Here's a crazy thought. Maybe she could be the one to generate the excitement. Or she could just find some other outlet for excitation instead of looking to fulfill that with dating. This type of behavior is basically the dating equivalent of pica. "Slutty portfolio" makes me suspicious of a troll post though.

SoloTheFord · 2020-10-09T04:14:29+00:00

I consider myself a "nice jerk" or an asshole but not a fucking asshole. So i guess I am her "rare" type. But she seems very busy fucking every guy she meets because they are hot. This is not the type of woman guys like me go for. I personally go for reliable, respectful, compassionate women who know how to have an adult conversation and be sarcastic at the same time. Also communication is huge for me. I refuse to date any more women who scream and gaslight and refuse to calmly talk things out. I just don't have the energy for that bullshit at my age anymore.

That said, I have been single for like 3 years deliberately. I like my solitude and i need to keep focusing on my health and my own things. i had usually in the past been tricked into relationships with very unstable and abusive women that i was basically a slave to and never thought i had the option to work on my own shit and online dating is so degrading and massive chore to me so i just don't doit anymore.

Anyway this woman would screw over the actual guy she says she wants. She likes the attention of other attractive men too much as she basically admitted enjoying her slutcapades. Any guy should steer clear of a woman like this, especially one in her 40s.

bablfish · 2020-10-09T04:55:23+00:00

so wants the kick of whoring around but desires a stable relationship ? ... I guess this lady needs to date a shrink

Pawnnshop99 · 2020-10-12T03:10:40+00:00

Her loss, I’m quiet af and might appear to be a good guy but a mf freak in the bedroom.

letmeseeantipozi · 2020-10-27T10:06:35+00:00

If you're a 40yo woman, the boat hasn't just sailed, it's gone around the world and come back with exotic spices.

Title	Does anyone else have this problem of wanting a dependable partner, but being insanely attracted to the complete opposite?
Author	bobless_jum
Upvotes	711
Comments	167
Date	October 8, 2020 1:56 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/j7dhba/does_anyone_else_have_this_problem_of_wanting_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/does-anyone-else-have-this-problem-of-wanting-a.311465 https://theredarchive.com/post/311465

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