How do you answer when asked "what do you do?"

NAmember81 · 2016-01-21T20:40:20+00:00

There was this pretty fly chick at the bar back when I was 23 y.o. that was a single mom aged 25 or 26 that was with my best friend's GF. She says immediately upon meeting "where do you work?" and I say "I drive a fork truck at so and so place".

I think she just collected child support and sat on her ass while her parents took care of her kid and she partied every nite and she tells me "you're hot, I'll give you that... I'd actually date you if you weren't such a scrub" and I said "that's a pretty big leap... you're assuming that I would actually have anything at all to do with you."

Who the fuck they think they are? gtfooh

mustang_mike · 2016-01-21T22:26:46+00:00

"Male model, duh" said in a way that she clearly knows it isn't true.

Or I'll make up a lie and see how long I can keep it going. My favorite was probably "I write pop songs". I spent 45 minutes telling some chick all about the day to day life of being a pop song writer, 100% improvised on the spot. It's good practice at building rapport and when the house of lies comes tumbling down it's fun to poke fun at he for believing it.

Most of the time I'll just say "What do I look like I do?" and make them guess. It's a fun way to get to know something about each other and establish rapport at the same time.

Do whatever you want. Tell the truth because who cares what she thinks about it? Make up a fun lie and see how long before you can't keep a straight face anymore. Whatever you decide to do stop caring about such a dumb thing. Relax and enjoy yourself.

PragmaticRedTruth · 2016-01-21T20:20:20+00:00

"I'm an astronaut, how about you?"

She laughs and asks you to be sincere.

"I invented Catholicism, so I just collect royalty checks now. How about you?"

And she will eventually give up when you continuously change the subject and hold frame.

GunsGermsAndSteel · 2016-01-21T23:33:08+00:00

You're under no obligation to answer the question they asked anyway.

"So what do you do?"

"Nice dress."

GunsGermsAndSteel · 2016-01-21T23:31:36+00:00

I own a tattoo shop, but I hate talking about it unless I'm actually at work. Everyone I meet has the same stupid questions, jokes, and lame stories about tattoos. I DO NOT FUCKING CARE, I'm trying to get an ice cream cone not listen to your story about the vision you had about your dead grandma that led you to get that kickass infinity symbol tattooed on your wrist, FUCK OFF...

So I often lie and tell people I paint houses.

whodat6922 · 2016-01-21T20:49:38+00:00

I have no doubt that all these responses in here that deflect the question might work for some of these guys, but I don't get the point.

I'm an engineer personally. That's probably the most beta-bux answer you could ever give. I give it anyways. I let the rest of my game get me out of the beta-bux light. It's pretty simple, just talk about sexual things and be outcome independent. Have abundance.

Project pride and happiness in your work and don't bring up money. If I was every asked about how much I make, I would certainly deflect the shit out of that question cause it's none of their business, but I see no harm in telling them what you do unless you are embarrassed about it.

Polar1zing · 2016-01-21T21:06:58+00:00

I blow up bridges.

"Where do you sleep?"

On a bed made of moneeeyy

CDBaller · 2016-01-21T23:18:40+00:00

International art thief. I've stolen the Declaration of Independence.

EGOtyst · 2016-01-22T04:06:04+00:00

I race cars, lift weights, and fondle women, BUT! I have weekends off, and I am my own boss.

slater2j · 2016-01-22T08:33:13+00:00

My friends and I drive around with our dog solving mysteries

EntitledShitHead · 2016-01-21T21:22:11+00:00

Don't over think it's man. The key is to really not give a shit. If you care, you'll fuck it up. Just remeber she's a stupid cunt and you're way above her and everything you do is way above her. You're taking time out of your day to talk to her. Have fun with it. If you're too attached to the outcome, you'll fuck it up.

augur-the-man · 2016-01-22T03:29:49+00:00

Day: "Guess." Night: "Girls."

idgaf- · 2016-01-21T21:26:10+00:00

I would reframe the question as "What do you do [for fun]?" and then just spit off whatever hobby comes to mind first. Talking about jobs is boring, most of the time.

If you do have to talk about your job you can express it around the impact you have. Instead of "I make software", "I make teacher's lives easier" or "I make sure XYZ always works" etc.

ioncehadsexinapool · 2016-01-22T06:22:36+00:00

What if she doesn't give a shit about what you do, but she gives a shit how you feel about what you do?

SovereignWings · 2016-01-21T22:28:55+00:00

I caught this one once from a fatty/post-waller I wasn't even talking to (she jumped in to 'save' her hotter friend from me):

"How much do you make?"

"Lol.. How much do you weigh?"

She took it like a champ and answered with her bodyweight, a believable 230, but I didn't care by then. Not saying its the best answer but I got a laugh out of it.

abdada · 2016-01-21T20:21:15+00:00

I used to answer cocky and vague and mysterious but now I'm just a dick about it. "You don't know?" ... "Well, it's not important then." And change the topic.

ag_nuke · 2016-01-21T20:31:33+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Beam_Me_Up2016 · 2016-01-21T23:43:10+00:00

I don't want them to know what I do, how I invest, or how many assets so have.

You don't tell them that much. Tell them your job. Don't give them your net worth.

itsbooming · 2016-01-21T21:41:33+00:00

"How old are you"?"

2girls1george · 2016-01-21T22:44:18+00:00

"I'm an illegal underground street racer"

Snxwe · 2016-01-22T01:05:26+00:00

I work as a bartender.

If I'm talking to a girl at a bar I like to say "I get people drunk"

Now she doesn't mind/isn't embarrassed about getting drunk because I've validated that behaviour.

yGTWgtNrco · 2016-01-22T01:05:47+00:00

"I make people smile, or alternatively, cry, which would you like?"

ispeaknot · 2016-01-22T03:19:10+00:00

"why, are we on a cash and dash basis?"

trumpgame · 2016-01-22T03:38:55+00:00

I sell missiles to brown and yellow people.

CatFancier4393 · 2016-01-22T04:20:31+00:00

I tell her the honest truth. Besides if she's with you longer than the night she'll find out anyways.

As long as you are proud of what you do and let it be known, it shouldn't matter.

Chaohinon · 2016-01-22T05:02:23+00:00

The truth. I grow cannabis (legal), cook part time for extra cash, and also build computers amd write as side hobbies (and hopefully someday they'll get me paid too). I make comfortable money doing things I enjoy, and that matters more to me than making fuck you money. Take it or leave it.

Don't qualify yourself. You love what you do, you're good at it, and even if not you've got a better plan B in the pipeline (right? right)

The_Turbinator · 2016-01-22T05:14:39+00:00

Tell her you're a professional cow empath. You read cows' minds and then play your secret knowledge of the dairy industry in the stock market.

Then, tell her that trading has closed for the day so now you're going to fuck her sideways in that broom closet over there.

teeelo · 2016-01-22T06:02:17+00:00

I don't really like talking about what I do for a living because when a career gets mentioned, immediately judgments regarding how much or how little money you make impact your impression of a person.

With that being said... I am the heir to the blockbuster fortune.

goingright32 · 2016-01-22T06:11:08+00:00

"Why is it important for you to know that"

Puts her back on the spot and deflects the question.

goingright32 · 2016-01-22T06:11:56+00:00

"Why is it important for you to know that"

Puts her back in the spotlight

ifeelhome · 2016-01-22T06:29:17+00:00

I actually think she's just assessing how you spend your day. Do you spend your day creating things, working with people etc. It comes across as defensive if for an entire conversation you just avoid it with weird phrases like "im a astronaut" - just note what you do and move on....

JamesSkepp · 2016-01-22T07:06:11+00:00

"I fix disposable cigarette lighters, i have a repair shop at xyz" - DavidX

This is a shit test, treat it as one. Agree and Amplify (ad absurdum).

redpillcynic · 2016-01-22T11:06:52+00:00

"I work on a Panda farm. You know, producing Panda fur and steak?" "I'm a drug dealer"

HelloImRIGHT · 2016-01-22T13:39:33+00:00

Her: What do you do?

You: What do you think I do?

blacwidonsfw · 2016-01-22T15:33:57+00:00

"Make stripper"

"What girl you don't think I got the body for that ?"

finitely_eclectic · 2016-01-22T19:06:41+00:00

I'm in murders and executions.

Solitary_Wolf · 2016-01-21T22:36:34+00:00

in person; "i work in a tailors. occasionally do a bit of modelling"

on tinder; "i save puppies from burning buildings"

LegElbow · 2016-01-21T23:56:47+00:00

"That's personal."

topdog82 · 2016-01-22T01:05:02+00:00

Lol I would "make money get turnt" or "talk shit and smoke blunts" or "fuck bitches get money". "I'm coming out with a mixtape soon. Me and my boi r working on it". I just keep throwing these at them lol

ihateyouguys · 2016-01-22T01:48:56+00:00

"What do you do?"

quizzical look "When?" or "It's highly dependent on the situation."

She usually laughs at herself for asking a such a dumb question. Also, I find it interesting when she corrects herself what direction it goes. Does she say "I mean what do you do for a living?" or does she realize she actually doesn't care and wants to know what you do for fun? Or, best of all, does she just realize it's a boring question to begin with and finds something better to ask?

landon042 · 2016-01-21T23:19:28+00:00

I've been lurking a while, younger guy here and this is the best shit I ever saw year ago I think:

I hunt animals at the zoo if i cant go to a safari in africa.
Rhino balls sell for a lot

Wondering if anyone remembers? I've used it before and I usually say I rob banks/people (instant tingles full power)

awkwardtouching · 2016-01-22T02:39:37+00:00

Seems like lying only makes sense if you're a little bit ashamed of your job, or trying to avoid gold diggers.

Since I'm not fabulously wealthy, nor ashamed of what I do - Why would I lie. I could care less what she thinks about my job, and it aligns with my interests and passions. Helps weed out chicks that will eventually bore me

TomFoo · 2016-01-21T21:22:15+00:00

"Drug Dealer. No, I can't give you a sample of what I deal, it will knock you out cold."

Title	How do you answer when asked "what do you do?"
Author	EnlightenedViking
Upvotes	25
Comments	74
Date	January 21, 2016 8:13 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/421san/how_do_you_answer_when_asked_what_do_you_do/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-you-answer-when-asked-what-do-you-do.159664 https://theredarchive.com/post/159664

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