Approached a girl - worst experience ever

sureuhhuhyea · 2020-06-24T01:51:34+00:00

Never someone run away but have told me to go away. Not sure which is worse. You're all good man. As long as you didn't Giggity-giggity after you said she was cute, you did nothing wrong or wierd. She probably just has some past issues or bad experiences

Pilk70 · 2020-06-24T01:59:32+00:00

Yeah I can see where it may have creeped her out.

Maybe next time try smiling and saying "hello." Your response should be based on her's. If she gives a friendly then introduce yourself and go from there.

Besides, you gave the power away with a lame compliment. It's all in the "ping and the pong" bro.

Better luck next time.

MadmanInABluebox · 2020-06-24T06:12:38+00:00

Don't blame yourself for her running away, you can never know what experiences someone has gone through. Most women do have a fear of men, and with good reason. Like others said, introducing yourself and smiling is the best way to get someone to interested in a conversation.

It also depends on the area you approached her, approaching someone at night in a semi-busy area is questionable, especially if it's during the week. However, if it's the weekend and more people are out, then it's generally more acceptable.

Don't forget women get harassed daily and you should keep that in mind when approaching them.

JuneBerryBug94 · 2020-06-24T05:28:36+00:00

Ah yeah that’s a little creepy to say to a complete stranger, especially if they are alone. I would try to quickly leave the area too.

giggirltra · 2020-06-24T07:49:55+00:00

As a girl, when I read your post can I just advise you that it would have scared me too honestly. I think the mistake was that the very first thing you said to her was about her body and appearance, therefore “sexual” in nature. It would have made her feel scared in the sense that you were viewing her as “prey” almost? Do you get what I mean? I think what I’m trying to say, is my advice to you is to find something that is NOT sexual in nature (no reference to how she “looks good” etc). It would be better to simply smile and say, “hi...” and then figure out something else to say that’s neutral and non threatening like for example if she has a dog: “that is a beautiful dog! What breed is this?” And use the dog as your in to build up her trust a bit more. Or maybe say something about the weather even or how good it is to get out after quarantine! Just something really casual. After several interactions like this, maybe even or a few days, then you can start throwing in comments like, “you’re a good runner, do you run a lot?” And maybe compliment her outfit. Essentially I’m just saying your big mistake was what you said, straight off the bat. You need to build a safe rapport with her first. Good luck. I know you mean well! ❤️

blueidiot314 · 2020-06-24T02:50:50+00:00

One time a girl just pretended like I didn't say anything to her and kept on walking. That's funny though.

Snowmist92 · 2020-06-24T17:17:24+00:00

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2020-06-24T07:49:13+00:00

Approached a girl on a dance floor once and before I could even get a word out of my mouth she said “You look like Sloth from the Goonies!” So yeah, that was pretty uncool

2020-06-24T10:06:13+00:00

Stick with it. This is how resiliance is built.

Rejection is needed to develop that IDGAF attitude, once you stop caring, the magic will happen

erect_sean · 2020-06-24T12:00:09+00:00

It sucks that she reacted like that but she probably had her reasons, don’t take it personally and move on. Also you coyld probably give us more details on how you approached maybe you did something that appeared threatening.

As a final note, I see you’re getting downvoted for no reason lol ignore the nouse here, unfortunately there are people who have never approached or don’t really know what this sub is about. Stay strong, keep trying and post your interactions to get feedback

Svellah · 2020-06-24T17:42:37+00:00

Don't approach girls when it's dark outside. It may seem normal to you, but many women DO find it creepy. We don't know your intentions and many have had bad things happen to them because of this. You may have had neutral/good (in your eyes) intentions, but you must realize not everyone is like that, and we can't really tell random man's intentions, especially in the dark.

2020-06-24T07:28:46+00:00

Cringe is basically part of day game.

The other day I complimented two girls and scared the shit out of one of them and a storekeeper cracked up laughing. Embrace the cringe, it happens. It's unescapable. You have to have cringe approaches for there to be flawless approaches where you number close your perfect girl.

jackmagpie · 2020-06-24T10:13:33+00:00

Never come up from behind a girl to approach her. Side walks are tricky.

Thebussinessman · 2020-06-24T11:03:40+00:00

Maybe bc it was at dusk?

floodgater · 2020-06-24T18:37:49+00:00

Dude - coronavirus. Some people are super uncomfortable being approached in public because of this.

poopooguy613 · 2020-06-24T11:30:08+00:00

You must be one ugly nigga 🤣🤣🤣

TheBookOfSeil · 2020-06-24T06:27:12+00:00

Don't comment directly on people's bodily appearance. Instead, just say "hi" or find something about them to compliment them on, like their clothing, a necklace charm, their shoes, or how it looks on them. "Hey, I like your dress. It looks good on you," or "Hey, that's a cool charm. I like _____, too." Women like being complimented on their styles or choice of clothing because they relate typically relate it with something about themselves.

Note: Only compliment if you mean it. Genuine compliments are much more appreciate than forced compliments that come off as obviously hitting on them in a way that they might not like. "Those jeans make your ass look so nice," or "Your hair is so pretty. Can I have some of it?!" Just don't do it.

Be cool when you compliment someone and be genuine about it.

recyclablebanthas · 2020-06-24T11:29:53+00:00

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JxHeck · 2020-06-24T06:32:06+00:00

Maybe she has a bad fear of stuff like assault and gets paranoid

chauve6 · 2020-06-24T06:33:51+00:00

and why you give a fuck tho?

Bence94x · 2020-06-24T06:49:30+00:00

Dont take it personally. She is just a person too. Maybe she had a pretty bad day, maybe she was frustrated and stressed. You know exactly if you are in a pretty bad mood it sometimes doesn't matter if someone is kind to you, your response could be grumpy. Plus because you said you approached 15 other girls before and they response were positive or neutral I don't think you were creepy.

maxpowell1993 · 2020-06-24T06:48:09+00:00

I have read some of your posts describing your cold approaches everyday. You're making good progress don't give up. It seems to me that you are working harder and not smarter. Why not read some books to cover your basics and then apply them when you're out? 3 seconds rule, how you dress, walk,show value, relate to them ? Someone has already gone through the pain you're going through for you, you might as well take advantage of it!

michaelmanal · 2020-06-24T23:17:44+00:00

Ahhahahahahahahhaj

fielausm · 2020-06-24T06:56:09+00:00

On a throwaway account too, huh? Mustabeen rough.

If you want to try that again, a few tips that I got into:

Keep your body language non-aggressive. Have your chest pointed away from them, or angled out. For example, in a karate match, you want your body pointed at your enemy cause you're going to knock them cold. If you point your chest away, like you're pausing-but-not-staying, it's less "threatening". It makes breakaway easier.
Don't go broad. Don't go elaborate. A simple, "Hey, that dress looks very nice." Or, "I like your fashion sense. Don't know if anyone's told you that today." does well. But saying "You look good", while not offensive, leaves too much room for interpretation. It's harder for a girl to refute and say, "No, this dress looks like a bag for garden-mulching, thank you very much."
Know when to walk away. No professional pitcher, batter, striker, or goalie is ever 100%. Don't expect the same from yourself. You came to post that you failed 1/15 times. But you forgot to congratulate yourself on 15 attempts, and 14 positive interactions.

To answer the last bit of your question, yeah. I have. I made one girl cry at a bar, not because I was being mean, but because every word that fell out of my mouth came across wrong.

HALO23020 · 2020-06-24T09:16:54+00:00

If this is your first negative interaction after 15 neutral/positive ones, you did nothing wrong. When you approach many people, it's inevitable that some react negatively/strangely. She was probably paranoid or had some sort of bad past experience.

Lavender_flow · 2020-06-24T10:52:21+00:00

Perhaps you could get into your brain that most women DON'T want to be approached? Like imagine that! I dont want a random stranger to talk to me or approach me at all, I don't want you staring at me neither. I don't two shits if you think I am cute or hot, I am not an object. HOW HARD is that to understand? Seriously, grow up and learn to think differently and realize that WOMEN ARE PEOPLE and not objects for desire. Jesus Christ the entitlement in this post is off the roof and yeah, you are being creepy as hell.

this_ismy_username78 · 2020-06-24T17:05:44+00:00

A friend of mine literally got pushed away when he tried to dance with a woman at a concert at once. It was pretty alarming, and then pretty hilarious.

ghlibisk · 2020-06-24T06:13:03+00:00

Have a laugh and shake it off. That's pretty funny.

TXJohn83 · 2020-06-24T11:43:09+00:00

Dude its just numbers, keep moving and don't let it get you down.

TomasGee · 2020-06-24T16:48:13+00:00

Yeah dude. From exp I’ll tell u that u havent gotten enough of those to have skin in the game to be non reactive to this. It doesnt matter. Accept u’ll get those and move on. Its not u, its her. SOMETIMES its u, and I think that in this specific case, it was u. But it depends on the situation. But u need to brush it off and think about HOW and WHAT specifically you do, in ur intro (walking up/running up to girls). But mostly, just brush it off. Unless ur approach is not solid.

AgentNightWing7 · 2020-06-24T02:34:40+00:00

It's a reflection on her not you man! I hope she figures things out. Also good work on the 15 approaches. Im beginning to start game and i tried approaching today but i couldnt approach a single girl... So 15 sounds great compared to zero lol

anon517 · 2020-06-24T09:38:30+00:00

Why does it make you feel bad?

A random person decided that a random act is unappealing to them.

If I told you the color "green" makes me feel sick and if someone came up to me wearing green I would be creeped out, would you give a fuck? No.

There are many weird people with mental issues, so if a random girl has a mental issue with no social confidence and says for you to get away from them, you probably dodged a bullet.

You have to stop caring what random people think.

7Saturn7Saturn7 · 2020-06-24T04:20:51+00:00

That's hilarious lmao. You're fine though, some girls are weirdos, just avoid.

Rodders88 · 2020-06-24T08:29:39+00:00

She probably thinks your ugly. It’s only creepy if your not attractive.

shanuv12 · 2020-06-24T05:53:02+00:00

You did nothing wrong brother, she might have been a mean entitled girl or had experience, who knows? Do not give it much importance. There are all kind of people in this world. Do not made one bad experience be the defining moment for you and do not listen to these crappy advice here in the comments.

Snowmist92 · 2020-06-24T07:13:38+00:00

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putcoolusernamehere · 2020-06-24T15:50:07+00:00

This happens unfortunately. I once had a girl I was about to approach literally run away from me when she saw I was walking fast to catch up to her and approach (in broad daylight with other people in the area). Some girls are just easily spooked. I'd advise not game on the streets at night, and if you do, go indirect and build comfort first.

biaisekhmet · 2020-06-24T19:12:05+00:00

well all the commentors are not only good but accurate, even that some are like bitchy, but in the end you must conclude the following:
1.-Do not aproach random girls in the dark the worst idea
2.-Event the idea that you want to compliment her you must think twice and stablish a decent conversation, this days of #Metoo the girls are in shock and in defense modes agains any aproach by mens
3.-Chinese Virus times are the worst scenario you can imagine so most people are in panic
4.-In your approachin try to be kind, decent and take the most detailed notes what works and whant doesn't, and try to use most the things that work for you
5.-Try to learn some body language and observe the positive and negative tells when aproach

h1mera · 2020-06-24T14:14:58+00:00

In any situation you should be a winner! You showed a weakness. I would tell her something like: wait for me here. And leave. Or something like: I'll be back. So if you meet her next time(for example in a group of other people) it means that you left her because you don't like her. Not because she told you fuck off.

fliwskies · 2020-06-24T11:30:57+00:00

she might be escaping frm cops and wanted to save u insted cuz u told her shes cute :,)

yourgirlfriendsdad · 2020-06-24T06:03:03+00:00

That's a hard test, re approach if you see her again and just try and show your emotional coolness

Title	Approached a girl - worst experience ever
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	61
Comments	130
Date	June 24, 2020 1:44 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/hertlf/approached_a_girl_worst_experience_ever/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/approached-a-girl-worst-experience-ever.1497691 https://theredarchive.com/post/1497691

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