[deleted by user]

freel0der · 2022-04-06T15:39:30+00:00

Yes and learn to relax. Once someone is able to relax more around a woman it will be easy to pick up on the cues.

Delicious_Ad_1853 · 2022-04-06T16:51:30+00:00

I think the best advice to give inexperienced men is to get experience "reading the room."

If rookies were capable of that, they wouldn't be struggling so much.

They need to learn how to read the room, which involves countless little tidbits like the couple you mention at the end. It takes a lot of reading and a lot of practice to find that happy medium between blind pawing and unnecessary requests for consent.

You can sum it all up as "reading the room" but that doesn't make it any easier for them to learn. It's just an inactionable cliche.

putcoolusernamehere · 2022-04-06T19:25:39+00:00

I think learning to read the room is the most important thing in game. Every time I bog myself down with a firm rule I end up missing opportunities. For ex, recently I had one of my best approaches in a while. Girl seemed absolutely thrilled I approached and even invited me to stay longer when I said I don’t want to take up to much of her time. Easily could’ve pushed for an instadate there but settled for the number because I made it a rule for myself to not instadate after having a few awful ones ruin good approaches. Calibrate to what the situation calls for, that’s what the best at this stuff do.

srd4 · 2022-04-06T18:39:53+00:00

Escalate but calibrate. To put simply.

NineteenAD9 · 2022-04-06T19:34:51+00:00

Truth.

A lot of people who make threads here would just benefit from common sense.

Saw some dude here tell a guy to make a woman touch his heart as a part of a cold approach script 😂😂

Some people on Reddit gonna get yall embarrassed.

Neo-Rio · 2022-04-07T04:47:37+00:00

You can actually ask girls if you can touch them in intimate areas and if the feeling is right they will say yes.

You really need a read of the room.

daddysgotanew · 2022-04-06T22:29:36+00:00

Who says all these men are inexperienced? I’m gonna let you in on a little secret. The more experience you have with women, the more jaded you become and the more you realize just how much the game is rigged. I speak as someone who’s been there in the trenches; had some success, and 10-20 times the amount of failure.

I’m not some outsider looking in. That’s the bloops.

willgo-waggins · 2022-04-06T20:08:16+00:00

Relax.

Work on your self confidence or at least being brave enough to take a plunge.

Live in moderation. You list two extremes but actually that is not truly advice but just peoples personal opinion telling someone else how they should act.

When I give advice here or anywhere I try to be objective and neutral and then I offer something - preferably recent - from my own personal experience as an example of what I mean. This is never to say “do it my way” or “don’t be a predator” but rather just a voice of experience sharing that in an effort to educate and offer an option(s).

MissionAd399 · 2022-04-06T20:09:31+00:00

Excellent post

youcheekydelinquent · 2022-04-06T21:07:49+00:00

And yes, the way the Sex/Consent PSA's are structured is for fucking morons who don't know how to have a conversation with someone. You can totally ask for consent in a really sexy way.

You have to work on it. You can't be like, "...hey...I....uhmm...please....would it be ok i uh...." --> Instead, either be coy with someone you're learning about or be clear and direct with someone who you know is feeling you and you can escalate and get consent. "I'd to kiss you."

Wait and see her reactions. Does she smile? Is she looking at you, away? Leaning? Does she say anything?

There usually is nothing to "force" when it comes to actions. If they're not begging you for the next thing or asking you to do it to them I think honestly you are doing it wrong or giving you pre-consent then chill out and learn to watch.

TheTruth221 · 2022-04-06T21:58:13+00:00

lack of experience is the inexperienced

Bornagainvurgin24 · 2022-04-06T22:42:30+00:00

ohhh! Read my post about how to escalate for a great example. This is blatant self promotion but I'm decent at reading cues and body language YMMV

hostergaard · 2022-04-06T22:46:22+00:00

Learning to read the room is why he has to escalate. The advice women gives means he will never experience anything, always escalating means you will try and fail a million times but the failures will give you the experience needed to succeed and read the room better

SlyderKmK · 2022-04-07T01:44:25+00:00

Haha...being able to read the cues the woman gives off is the consent you need. Are they rubbing your cheek? Are they running their hand on your arm? Do they look at your lips, and just smile when you're looking at them?

There are many cues someone will give you...and its not all that subtle...lol

incognito3107 · 2022-04-07T05:39:14+00:00

Best advice for someone who knows nothing is to read some fundamental theory on his own and get just any practice before asking for any instructions.

gannex · 2022-04-07T06:30:17+00:00

This is solid advice

astropydevs · 2022-04-07T08:35:15+00:00

Learn to have fun and not make it sexual. If she digs your vibe and like you, she will let you know by making long eye contact or touch you more. Key is understanding the signs and what to look for. Also not assuming things

1hatethis · 2022-04-07T09:29:25+00:00

You don’t hold hands on a first date - that shit is creepy

As for the rest simply never take dating or seduction advice from women. They may know what they like but like and respond to are totally different things and they’re clueless about the latter

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	186
Comments	37
Date	April 6, 2022 3:22 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/txon0x/i_think_two_things_are_hurting_inexperienced_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1262750 https://theredarchive.com/post/1262750

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