Ghosted after the 4th date [recovered]

NotANerdReally · 2022-02-07T12:56:47+00:00

On the bright side, this is a clear sign that you can move on. It’s extremely rare for a girl to come back after she’s ghosted someone, and if she does it’s because she needs a temporary distraction.

There are 4 billion women in the world. It’s really not worth hurting over one who doesn’t want you.

Indecision999 · 2022-02-07T15:29:07+00:00

All good dawg - we all been "heartbroken" over a girl that wasn't worth it! Be sad but always try to see the positive things and try to be a better you, always! :) heads up king

MO_drps_knwldg · 2022-02-07T15:46:21+00:00

Corey Wayne has good saying in his videos: “Rejection breeds obsession”

You only want to spend time with people who respect you and really want to be around you. Focus on the red flags you observed and how a relationship with this person would be misery after the infatuation faded.

youcheekydelinquent · 2022-02-07T17:42:53+00:00

Be grateful, finding out 4 dates in and however many chats/messages etc. Change your mindset here, she clearly wasn't ready or mature enough to communicate where she was or what she wanted. Ask yourself what exactly were you attracted to? Was it how she related to you? Was it for who she was as a person? Learn or win. That's it.

dynamicly · 2022-02-07T16:32:33+00:00

Right there with ya bud I got ghosted after the 5th date and it’s because I didn’t sleep with her when she wanted to lol I fucked up and learned a valuable lesson. Think someone here commented this. But sex leads to a deeper emotional connection and there’s no recovering from the situation if you reject them

klippklar · 2022-02-07T13:35:01+00:00

Did you escalate?

JJJJJamesbaxter · 2022-02-07T17:28:07+00:00

The 4th date is in itself a red flag. If she's not into you by then that you're still out here counting dates, give it up.

StereoFood · 2022-02-07T17:26:09+00:00

How did the dates go? You had 4 so surely there was some connection there. What do you feel changed that might have turned her away? Also, she might have just had a past lover come back to their life or one they have been eyeing before you. It may not be personal.

JambiChick · 2022-02-07T23:04:48+00:00

Well, being ghosted hurts, and those emotions need to be explored so that you can become better equipped to handle them the next time this happens. And honestly, why shouldn't it hurt? It's a complete & total dismissal of your feelings, your opinion, your time, your efforts...from someone you THOUGHT was interested in those feelings, opinions & efforts. Being bothered by this is valid, imo.

I wish, for you & for all of us, that ghosting wasn't acceptable behavior, but it seems to be the norm now. The one thing we can do is make sure WE don't participate in it. The next person you're not interested in, make sure to let them know, even if it makes you uncomfortable. Do for someone else what someone didn't do for you :) I'm sorry this happened, and I hope you find someone who is worthy of your time. Best of luck 🍀

hoonmasta19 · 2022-02-08T02:16:39+00:00

Keep your head up man. We all been there. All you can do is think of the bright side and keep moving forward. All I can say is life is too short to dwell on the past. We’re all going to make it!

oreopimp · 2022-02-07T14:26:55+00:00

Your new mantra: There will be zero pushes for a relationship unless SHE brings it up. (see my previous comments for sources to help out with this and things to watch/read to get a better mindset)

Post it on your mirror until it becomes natural

You went on 4 dates and already it sounds like you're living through the end of a relationship -- likely your behavior with this woman conveyed the pressure of a relationship in many different ways. Just hook up have fun, and be chill. If you need more female companionship than she is willing to give by hanging out, then casually see other women as well. Until you guys are committed or have some kind of agreement everything is fair play. You have to be full on masculine energy that loves feminine energy but doesn't need it to thrive -- but goddamn it feels good when its around -- but right now you sound like you're not living in your masculine energy, you sound like you're living in your feminine energy (sad after 4 dates, highly emotional, listening to sad music)

As David Goggins (read his book, follow his Instagram) would tell you: you're letting your little bitch take the wheel. Kick that little bitch out of the driver's seat and take control. Focus on your personal growth.

Remember this, and I mean this brother to brother: I doubt she ghosted you, you ghosted yourself

PS. Maybe I'm wrong. She might not have even ghosted you. If you haven't sent her numerous texts already and it's been a week and the last conversation was chill, send her something small like 'hey trouble' or 'how's your sunday funday going' or 'hey girl, happy tuesday'

jdgrazia · 2022-02-07T16:48:47+00:00

you didn't provide a lot of details here, but future you will know exactly what went wrong, and will attribute the falling out to something you will eventually be able to control

swhatrulookinat · 2022-02-07T18:05:24+00:00

You say she didn’t send u a message, but did you send her a message? Maybe your both thinking the other ghosted? 4dates is a lot with no action tho. If you really liked her, just reach out to her impulsively. Let her know u been thinking about her. What do u have to lose. Just dont be stalker creepy or anything lol

hustle_sk · 2022-02-07T22:48:19+00:00

You win some you and you loose a lot. I've had plenty of dates where women went out of their way to mention how attractive I am, how good of time they had and how they want to go out again. Then ghost me after the date lol

LesWhite · 2022-02-07T23:27:54+00:00

Same thing happened to me a month ago. It is what it is. You just move on. People are people and if it didn't click, it didn't click. Simple as that

Woujo · 2022-02-08T04:07:19+00:00

, so why am i listening To sad song right now ? She dont owe me anything.

Rejection always hurts, even when it is irrational. I have dumped girls and then felt bad when I saw them with other guys on social media.

The best thing to do here is try to figure out what you did wrong (hint: you probably acted needy and not challenging enough) and embark on a self-improvement program.

incognito3107 · 2022-02-08T05:05:47+00:00

Well, probably she get bored with the relationship and saw no future to it. I wonder how these 4 dates went, you should go through a lot of exciting moments, deep intimacy and know a lot about each other by now.

Anyway, sometimes it's just better to end it that way, as you are not compatible, the girl is crazy or you may hurt each other much in the future. You will move on eventually, maybe you engaged yourself too much in your thoughts, but in reality it was not that deep of a connection.

0iTina0 · 2022-02-08T05:07:14+00:00

Sometimes it doesn’t work out. Listen to the sad songs. Revel in the feeling. It is okay to strike out. Feel it and move on to the next try. :-). Life is long. There are so many amazing ppl out there. This isn’t the last time.

Mslatebloomer18 · 2022-02-07T15:47:22+00:00

I've ghosted him several times (ever since lockdown). Yet he keeps contacting me. Initiate texts but leave me on read. I'm confused with his behaviour myself. I hate it when people treat me like an option. I'm just saving myself from another heartbreak I guess.

triqerinoir · 2022-02-07T13:38:40+00:00

Did you kiss and have sex later?

Mslatebloomer18 · 2022-02-07T15:33:51+00:00

I've ghosted the guy I like ever since 2020 few weeks ago. I still secretly want him but I need to move on too.

SlyderKmK · 2022-02-07T20:57:39+00:00

Should've tried to escalate. That's probably why she doesn't want to see you anymore...but they won't say that.

RPslimjim · 2022-02-07T20:00:22+00:00

Ghosting is part of it. That’s why you should always source new women.

ScrumNoobie · 2022-02-07T20:05:51+00:00

To get over her fast and never get ghosted again look/search for “darius m” and “mj getright” on YouTube and this will help you a lot. All your questions will be answered even the ones you forgot to ask

UrFavPlayerIsBack · 2022-02-07T23:53:25+00:00

Lemme guess. 4 dates and no sex

In that case, u deserve to be ghosted

Ps: forget the long term. Date just to fuck. 1-3d, no more. Relationship material will work her ass off to keep u around after sex. A red flag will hesitate

Title	Ghosted after the 4th date [recovered]
Author	abdelhamid99 [recovered]
Upvotes	134
Comments	113
Date	February 7, 2022 12:38 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/smp9ta/ghosted_after_the_4th_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/ghosted-after-the-4th-date.1267338 https://theredarchive.com/post/1267338

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