How do introverts get girls?

AceCoE · 2022-05-01T15:49:24+00:00

Introverted and socially anxious are two different things/not to be conflated with each other. Introverts are more likely to be socially anxious, it seems, but introversion =/= social anxiety or mental issues.

Now that that's out of the way, if you're introverted, bars and clubs might not be for you, so you'll have to meet women in more natural settings, like at work or through mutual friends and acquaintances. Maybe online, too. Chatrooms are still a thing.

If you're socially anxious, then you'll have to break through that social anxiety by going out of your comfort zone or working through whatever the issue is, whether it be self-esteem problems or deeper issues that need to be addressed.

JuicyOptimist · 2022-05-01T23:55:56+00:00

Get as fit as possible, dress well, lose your limiting beliefs and work on your masculinity(confront your fears instead of avoiding them).

Getting girls is a skill that you can improve so the more you shoot your shots the more experiences you have to learn the better you get at it.

Become an exciting person with an fun attractive lifestyle. Money can help with this.

Talking to girls should be a fun game, just like starting a new sport can be nerve wrecking when you first start eventually the better you get at it the more fun it gets. And the more fun it gets the more you want to do it and the more effortless it gets.

Lose the identity of the introvert or the anxious guy. You become what you think you are.

Develop a free and fun energy.

Remember that you’re not a static thing, people can change and grow by taking action and pushing through you’re resistance.

But really remember that talking to girls should be fun even if your getting rejected have a sense of humor about it it’s really not that serious and your not losing anything.

This is stuff worked for me

2022-05-01T15:44:51+00:00

I want to know this too.

peduxe · 2022-05-01T16:16:58+00:00

As an introvert the girls approach me and I just be as laidback as possible. Communicate with body language, a simple eye stare can speak louder than words.

But you need to get yourself out there, social anxiety can wear off the more you open yourself to someone.

And note that girls don’t care about what you say but how you say it. Don’t stress yourself over saying the right thing and if you feel like you said the wrong thing play it off as a joke.

conker1264 · 2022-05-01T16:25:22+00:00

We don’t

2seeyousmile · 2022-05-01T19:39:32+00:00

Like any of my introverted friends did. Wait until the extrovert adopts them.

Kronuk · 2022-05-01T21:43:38+00:00

Same way that extroverts do it. I'm an introvert and I simply make myself go talk to girls that I find attractive. Once I'm socializing it's all good, there seems to be a longer warm up period for us. I'm fine at festivals/clubs anywhere with lots of people, but I've also been frequenting places like that for over 10 years so I feel very comfortable and relaxed at all times. Have confidence and go after what you want. After a few too many days of socializing however, I can't wait to go chill by myself at home and be at peace.

awesomeroy · 2022-05-01T16:33:18+00:00

i met my ex wife in biology lab in college.

I was shy but forward with my intentions, i helped her study and often met up with her and a few friends to study, i made sure not to be seen as a friend, and she was a social butterfly. she got me out of my shell and helped me grow as a person.

paddingtonpower · 2022-05-01T16:58:27+00:00

be an introvert with social skills

Jay-Ames · 2022-05-01T20:20:30+00:00

First of all do not really look at extroverts. Go by your own strengths

Women like a mysterious man, so an introvert like you has got that covered.

Besides that, just approach women. They will like the confidence. Lead the conversation but let them do the talking.

ecish · 2022-05-02T03:28:18+00:00

I’m a socially anxious introvert, so I just…pretend that I’m not? That’s pretty much it. I pushed myself to just do it and now I’m more comfortable with women and in social situations than I’ve ever been.

It sucks at first; but it’s totally worth it

Live-Ad-6309 · 2022-05-01T16:51:13+00:00

They don't. You either learn to act like an extrovert with women, or you are celibate.

willgo-waggins · 2022-05-01T16:29:42+00:00

Every introverted (as above socially anxious is an entirely different thing and much more difficult to overcome) person I know - make or female - generally goes the route of drinking to relax. It’s a fine line though because you can quickly get too drunk and then be super over (I had an ex that would slam several shots then do shit like climb the outside of the dancing cage st the club), or do/say goofy dorky shit that later gets you fully embarrassed and afraid to go back to the people you acted out in front of or the place you were at.

My girl gets this way. She is naturally social but also quite quiet and kind of shy. When we are in a new environment or just starting an evening she very often will literally cuddle her head onto my chest or simply plaster herself up against me when people are taking to us.

But man once she gets her drink on she’s taking to EVERYONE and flirting and she’ll flash her tits at people and you name it. Then when she sobers up the next day she gets horrified at how she behaved and goes into a funk and hides out.

Physical_Cattle7261 · 2022-05-01T17:16:05+00:00

Humor, even if it's quiet. Some talent, curiosity about the world and the people in it.

Thin_Protection5616 · 2022-05-01T17:24:22+00:00

By doing day/street game instead of night game.

You literally have to force yourself to approach to get over the hurdle of paralyzing approach anxiety.

One thing I've done is consciously amplifying the pain of no taking action. If I see a girl I want to approach but don't, I'll internally start shit talking myself, calling myself a pussy and coward. This pushes me to avoid the pain the next time I see a girl I want to approach.

Tldr: amplify the psychological pain of inaction to the point where it overcomes the stress of approaching.

Neo-Rio · 2022-05-02T00:32:42+00:00

Introversion is not going to help you with women.

A man needs to be socially outgoing and above all, happy and having fun. That's what women find attractive.

The thing with introversion is that it takes you out of situations where you are likely to meet women, thus blunting your ability to have any chances at all.

Introversion means that large groups of people probably tire you out. It's not that you have no social skills. Quit the opposite. Many introverted people have great social skills, only that they choose to limit their interactions to only a small group of people.

You'll need to do pick up in normal settings without distractions.
Nightclubs and bars are out, but social and local events (food festivals, farmers markets, that sort of thing) are your best bet.

Basic85 · 2022-05-02T01:22:00+00:00

Luck, right place right time.

Kevin26039898 · 2022-05-02T02:02:40+00:00

Being attractive man

Background-Art-6859 · 2022-05-02T14:19:38+00:00

I am very introverted and I get very anxious in big crowds. I turned it around by starting a band. I'm lead singer/guitarist. Also I started not to care what ppl think of me or my music. This has helped with girls approaching me. My point is; if you're just yourself and unashamed of it, women notice that confidence. So take of it what you will but that's my. 2 cents. Hope it helps someone.

Sandvicheater · 2022-05-02T19:47:42+00:00

Liquid courage alcohol. I'm being serious, something about being slightly buzzed and losing some of your inhibitions makes talking to girls a lot easier.

ResponsibilityKey427 · 2022-05-01T17:15:04+00:00

By being attractive.

If you attractive just hop on tinder

kiramdahanett · 2022-05-01T15:45:07+00:00

Social circle warm approach ,

they get girls by passage of time being around them ,

same hot girl who fucks the introvert loser at work may reject the fuckboy daygame practitioner on the street if she doesn't feel good that day.

45 year old bankrupt fat dude who fucks a hot woman because that woman is friends with one of his friends & they hangout a lot , may reject a hot male on instagram because "he was too muscular ".

Sophiestication · 2022-05-02T09:51:55+00:00

Kidnapping lol

PmNudes-orMotivation · 2022-05-02T12:51:13+00:00

Introverted, used bumble, tinder, mutual friends, friends of coworkers (don't date actual coworkers ever) etc.

Have good dates. I made it clear, through my profile and in person, that I am a homebody and don't enjoy clubs but prefer traveling etc. As you get older this becomes more and more desirable. I'm talking 25 and older

This is honesty, but make sure you also stay interesting. I frequently get compliments on how much I know on various topics, but it's just hours on end watching YouTube in bed the entire weekend to recharge my social battery.

Long story short,

FrostingBrave · 2022-05-01T20:28:13+00:00

Dating apps

Beachbum74 · 2022-05-01T21:43:27+00:00

Online dating

SnooMacarons6242 · 2022-05-02T03:11:35+00:00

I’m introvert and socially anxious I don’t get much girls but ; Online has made it easier to meet women for me , and eventually I’ve found some that like my introvertedness , you just gotta put yourself out there a little more and take initiative . I know it’s difficult but go out of your way to try and start conversations, a simple Hey how are you doing can go a long way . Online of course in person if your feeling bold lol

WaffleConeDX · 2022-05-02T03:20:57+00:00

My husband and I are both introverted. We have our little moments. We met at work and became friends. After that we started doing things together like playing video games, having moving nights etc. We realized we liked being introverted together lol. We eventually fell in love and yeah. There’s been so many times we opted out of social gatherings just to hang out at home lol.

Not_Really_A_GC · 2022-05-02T04:56:15+00:00

Online! My friend, dating sites, apps, and games! 🍆

anou142 · 2022-05-02T05:04:56+00:00

Well being an introvert doesn’t mean that you can’t hold a conversation with a beautiful woman it just means that you enjoy being alone more than talking to people

determinator94 · 2022-05-02T06:37:33+00:00

I’m introverted as well, and I’ve become less social anxious. In fact, several years ago, while I was living in OC, I became incredibly socially paralyzed after a former best friend spilled the beans to a gal I was into at the time that a) I was into her and b) that I grew up with an abusive father for 12 years after I watched my parents divorce when I was 6. She ended up using that information my “best friend” told her to tell a majority of my other friends that I was “unstable dangerous and violent.” Just like that, I was cut off and cast aside. Even in public (I don’t know to what extent who heard that twisted narrative or was told about it), strangers used to give the stink eye like I was a criminal walking among them. So I just gave up and got bitter, walked around with a “fuck the world // everyone is disposable” mentality. For several years, even as I was slowly making my way towards a better place, social situations left me paralyzed and unable to do anything. Subconsciously I thought a repeat of what happened in 2015 WOULD happen.

Now that I’m living in San Diego, I was taken aback initially by how… dare I say it… “normal” and not so up their own ass people were, how chill they were, and not so dependent on a lifestyle of convenience, comfort and routine. Because I knew I needed to change for the better, I started attending social settings (lately it’s been rooftop pool parties) outside of my comfort zone as challenging as it may be to meet people and develop the social value I couldn’t find in OC.

Essentially, if you wanna get girls as an introvert, it’s all about exercising those social skills. Don’t be afraid to get outta your comfort zone and attend social parties/events/venues. Over time it’ll get easier and feel less Herculean.

Zealousideal6669 · 2022-05-02T07:45:52+00:00

From an introvert guy perspective who used to be a nice guy but now fine with girls. Learn how to be attractive and be confident with being social. Probably was the 2 biggest things I got good at over the past years. Okay I prefer 1v1 conversation instead of approaching a group of people but I can do both. And how? bc I wanted to reach that level whatever it takes. So you definitely have to take steps and moves if you wanna get better but it's not gonna be worth that much if you don't have a strong why why would you go through this suffer to experience how these things feel like

Philipparty · 2022-05-02T09:32:40+00:00

You can be shy bith as extrovert and introvert. The chill guy at the party who doenst talk that much (or the mysterious guys that every teen wants to be) are introverts. The ones talking 24/7 and in group discussions are extroverts.

It just comes down to where do you get your energy. From many or few people. Depending on co fidence levels, introverts would be better than extroverts, cause theyre more chill and require less stimulus to be at their best

Dorkuzan · 2022-05-02T10:00:48+00:00

Hehe thats the funny part boah …. we dont.

LongHairedKraut · 2022-05-02T15:51:51+00:00

Luck. Ultimately that's the only thing that will save us. You just have to be in the right place at the right time. Otherwise learn how to enjoy being single

Title	How do introverts get girls?
Author	bigtittylover001
Upvotes	105
Comments	61
Date	May 1, 2022 3:31 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ug2bsq/how_do_introverts_get_girls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-introverts-get-girls.1260707 https://theredarchive.com/post/1260707

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