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strategos_autokrator Archive

View 38 posts and 2,817 comments by strategos_autokrator on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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541

LTRstrategos_autokrator/r/TheRedPill09/01/15 01:57 PM
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strategos_autokrator/r/MarriedRedPill25/03/15 09:51 AM
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strategos_autokrator/r/MarriedRedPill11/12/14 10:21 AM
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strategos_autokrator/r/MarriedRedPill20/01/15 11:28 AM
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strategos_autokrator/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/15 08:35 AM
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strategos_autokrator/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 07:52 AM
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strategos_autokrator/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/15 09:46 AM
Showing the 1,000 most recent of 2,817 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

It is in itunes and audible.
/r/RedPillBooks02/07/16 12:12 PM
1

there is an audiobook version too.
/r/RedPillBooks01/07/16 05:25 PM
1

I'm working on a post about vision. However, keep working in improving all the other basis, as it is the key to having a strong vision.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/06/16 07:00 PM
3

I do like the new Flair for Blue Pill Brigades.
/r/askMRP17/05/16 10:52 AM
1

Boundaries are what you actually defend. She will get upset at them and rage, trying to test if you mean them or not. How else will she understand this is for real? Stay strong defending it. Also, if she is taking it on the kids, this is fucked up. As a father, your boundaries must cover them. If this means leaving the house for pizza with the kids and leaving the ragemomster behind, so be it. Be a man. Protect the kids.
/r/askMRP02/05/16 09:21 AM
9

I'm afraid of dying without having done anything that means anything to anyone. It is impossible to know if what you do will mean anything to anyone else. However, it is possible for you to live a life that is meaningful to you. When you do that, many people will find meaning in it as well.
/r/askMRP21/04/16 06:02 PM
2

I'll refer you to the sidebar: "Have you figured out that you have been the Captain of your ship all along and that only you can fix the problems?" I guess the answer is no. You are focusing on questions that don't matter. Why would any internet stranger tell you if you need to give her until tomorrow or 30 days? Why does it matter? What matters are your own values, your choices, that you are ok with them. While you haven't figured that out, the problem isn't the alcoholism, or the details of ho…
/r/askMRP12/04/16 05:14 PM
1

We can't help you. While you think someone will come and save you, it means you are just not being a captain. All you can do is step up and lead. What is accetable to you? What would make YOU happy? What things you will do towards that?
/r/askMRP12/04/16 05:00 PM
1

did you do all the activities? it sounds like you are walking on eggshells around a shitty person and you are focusing on trying to figure if walking on your tips or crawling like a snake is better to break less shells.
/r/askMRP12/04/16 04:56 PM
3

Have you read NMMNG yet?
/r/askMRP11/04/16 08:16 PM
1

I've been writing a series of posts discussing frame. Here is the first one.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/04/16 08:55 PM
2

I still slip up all the time because I aint perfect. This is a BP mentality. You don't have to be perfect. But you can always identify why you keep failing at that task, and take steps to not keep making the same mistake over and over. The problem is you are still looking at her approval and her actions. You don't have OI at all. She smells that. That is why she is being bitchy.
/r/askMRP26/02/16 12:50 PM
1

Read NMMNG. It has a lot of "questions" and "activities" that are about owning your shit. After, read MMSLP. It has the idea of a Man Action Plan. Design yours, and use Own Your Shit to keep you accountable. When in doubt, figure out something that you can improve, admit it, and say what concrete steps you will take to do so next week. Make yourself accountable.
/r/askMRP26/02/16 12:47 PM
2

This is OneItis, and it is the real source of your problems. It isn't her actions, it is your. what guy wouldn't not want their LTR to? I'll turn the question around: What kind of man is this insecure? A beta man. And that is why she does this stuff. She can smell your betaness, so she is less attracted to you. Instead of going MORE beta, go more alpha. GIve less fucks Be a man with Outcome Independen and options. That way, you don't crave your woman to be loyal to you, you just know that if she…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/02/16 10:20 AM
2

The advise is to ignore her actions and not mate-guard. This is a very basic RP tennet. You keep hamstering about it wanting to know how to make guard in a weak way. You are blue pill as hell, which is why you keep asking for beta solutions to a problem that is fixed with the alpha. The problem isn't her actions. The problem is YOU. Your weakness. Your insecurity. Bro, do you even lift? Bro, have you read NMMNG? Until you do, you will keep trying to change her, which will make you seem weak to h…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/02/16 10:13 AM
1

If you want that kind of advice, the red pill isn't for you. Go to /r/relationships with that kind of blue pill nice-guy weak crap.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/02/16 10:11 AM
3

I love how we are telling you the real fix of what to do, and you keep ignoring it and going to your beta ways. Bro, do you even lift?
/r/MarriedRedPill25/02/16 04:10 PM
1

Men are assertive, honest and direct. Women are covert. Men don't need to mate guard because men have an abundance mentality. Women are jealous and fall for online drama. Read NMMNG first.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/02/16 04:09 PM
1

Dude, you are operating from her frame completely. Because of this, you will fuck up. You are trying to answer those questions based on the effect on her. Instead, do what you want. Thinking you can't replace chemistry is oneitis. You can. All you need is to keep an abundance mentality, fuck a lot of women, and they will start acting in the way that creates chemistry just to keep you interested. You will fuck up because you haven't read the basics clearly. You will fuck up because the problems t…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/16 09:30 AM
3

When it gets to disrespect, you need to nuke it. Nuking means showing with actions you will leave, even leave the relationship, if there is disrespect. In a physical situation, this means you just leave for a long time and go do other things. Let her steam in her own guilt. She will then try to blame you for making her do it. Ignore that, and use tricks from WISNIFG to make it clear what you will do if she goes there. Be ready to talk to a lawyer and everything. Remember, you don't demand respec…
/r/askMRP24/02/16 09:18 AM
1

If you struggle with this, just be busier, do more shit from YOUR vision. If you here her asking to solve a problem, just think "Is this a real problem that affects my vision?" and if so, rank it in terms of priorities with regards to the stuff you have to do. Note how her feelings of how "important" this issue is has no bearing in the situation. By being busy, you train her that your time is valuable, and she will filter a lot of her crap.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/02/16 09:16 AM
1

How are you handling shit test? Are you passing them with ease?
/r/askMRP17/02/16 01:07 PM
1

Of course she takes offense. She doesn't believe you have frame to mean it. So she tests to see if she can manipulate you. If she is acting all passive-aggresive, just do more fun things without her, and show no resentment. Let her mourn in her own passive aggresiveness. Only when she faces these consequences can she decide if she wants to own her feelings. Trying to make her understand this with words will not work. It is operating in her frame, and engaging her hamster. You thinking you have t…
/r/askMRP16/02/16 09:36 AM
2

Have you read WISNIFG? I remember your previous posts. In all you are having the same issue over and over and over. You have zero leadership, and are doing things the weak way. The problem isn't her, it is your lack of vision, your lack of assertiveness, and your fear of enforcing consequences.
/r/askMRP05/02/16 11:39 AM
2

The key difference is to have it as a consequence of establishing what is acceptable. First, have the talk like a man. If she doesn't want to comply by herself, then, enforce this consequence. The action will tell her you meant business this way.
/r/askMRP05/02/16 11:37 AM
2

Amazing achievement. I just purchased it.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/02/16 08:20 AM
2

you havent internalized the principles and that is why you have oneitis. do the activities in NMMNG. they are for making you less needy of her. only when you stop that, you will have the frame to pull off the rest. The main issue is you keep seeking her validation from her. That weakens everything you do. Heck, you think you must change validation from her to validation to other women as teh only choice, without realizing the problem is you being needy.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 05:27 PM
1

you do what she says. then you want to use logic to show her she is wrong. that is being in her frame 100%. you will do a victim puke and engage her hamster. instead, dont do what she says she wants. do what you want.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 05:25 PM
1

Dude you are so much in her frame. That is why she refuses to fuck you. Read the basics. Own your shit. In a few months you can turn things around.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 01:54 PM
5

Victim Puke Alert
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 01:52 PM
1

Ok so how do you approach your wife? This all in the sidebar bro. You seems like you are frustrated and want quick fixes. That doesn't exist. You need to do the hard work, and it means at least, reading the Prereqs. Otherwise, you will kee fucking up and won't know why.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 01:51 PM
1

This is so true. I've had women come talk to me to help out a beta man they know. They don't say it that way, they don't say why they ask me, but it is clear they admire my frame, and know in some way those men lack frame. Some have been very overt, without using TRP terminology. I know I can't change men, and that giving out "wisdom" is a waste of time. I tell them I don't understand what they want me to do, that if the guy wants to become more assertive (they say "Yes, that is it, assertive, y…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 09:48 AM
5

I want her to want me if I am to stay married to her, This is the definition of seeking approval. Remember, women can be your Mother (that make you feel loved) or your Lover (that is crazy about you fucking her). Not both. Women don't love how men love. Women love how men make them feeling. You wanted her to feel wanted is a feminine pattern of thought, it is needy, and seeks validation. As man you when you want a woman to want you, you become needy. Instead, be the man that doesn't need that ap…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 09:36 AM
2

The problem isn't TRP, it is you. You are negotiating desire and seeking validation. RP says that doesn't work. Don't blame the pill, blame yourself for making such an obvious stupid mistake. You are blaming your wife, which is a way to empower her hamster and operate from her frame. You clearly haven't even read the stages of dread, or a lot of the basic material. You operate from her frame. Etc. The problem is you, your beta mindset.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 08:49 AM
2

Good to hear the book will be released soon!
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 08:46 AM
4

I don't believe you have read the books. Have you read all the Prereqs? Because you have a terrible case of seeking for approval, and also of no frame. You are making stupid mistakes addressed in WISNIFG too. All this which is very unattractive to women. All your issues are very basic stuff. You are trying to change her instead of changing yourself. That makes things worse.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 08:45 AM
3

You are not getting what I'm saying at all. I can't tell if it is your hamster, or that you haven't read the prereqs. I worry with your mindset, you will mess up your marriage, as your plan is to focus more on her approval (her response) instead of focusing less on it (OI). You don't have to fuck other women. You don't have to cheat. Women desire men that could cheat, men that are desired by other women. They despise men with oneitis. Focusing on her is like the little kid "Mommy mommy, look how…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 08:42 AM
3

You might be. The way to tell is that if she does a task, sometimes she comes to you looking for approval. Sometimes a kiss in the head saying "you did a good job, thanks" is all that she really wants. And even if things don't go well, you reassure her by taking over, and focusing on the problem.
/r/askMRP02/02/16 08:37 AM
2

I admit I didn't get it on the first read. I focused too much on the specific details, and was worried about them being too wild. On second read, I was just looking how to make it my own, reframing the concepts, and it really clicked. SGM is really about changing your mindset to just have fun in bed, instead of just trying to make her cum. By focusing on having fun, you last longer, and she also comes quicker. A lot of the DEVI stuff is really more about your frame than living a crazy fantasy. A…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/16 08:25 AM
3

You are the captain. If something goes wrong, in the end, you have to fix it. So you delegate as much as you think she can handle safely that adds to your life, knowing that if you disconnect too much, and she messes up, it will be your mess to clean. It is only too much when if something bad happens, you blame them, or you can't fix it and get frustrated. If she is a good officer, she is a great asset, and it is good to delegate. Go reward her for her good work. Also, just check on her regularl…
/r/askMRP02/02/16 08:17 AM
1

Picture frame guy lol
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/16 04:09 PM
2

I said that while I want to have more and better sex, that wasn't really what I wanted, I said I wanted my wife to have genuine desire. Well, what you can do is become a man that has more and better sex. So why don't you want that for real, instead of the other thing you can't get?
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/16 04:02 PM
6

You can't make her have genuine desire. Period. First, you don't control desire nor her. Second, this way of thinking is seeking approval, which is beta and makes her desire you less. It is like being an olympic gymnast that during the routine he is always staring at the judges, to the point he turns his body the wrong way to keep checking to see their reaction. That only fucks up his routine. All you can do is become a man that women desire. If you do, there is a good chance she will desire you…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/16 03:39 PM
1

Mindfulness is simply the tools of understanding your own hamster enough you see it for what it really is, and don't let it affect your behavior.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/16 08:06 AM
1

his podcast is on itunes. i think his podcast is the vest intro to mrp.
/r/askMRP28/01/16 09:18 PM
2

wild is about a mindset and controlling the frame, not so much about doing crazy fantasies and s&m shit. wild can be misionary even, just very intense.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/16 11:40 PM
1

what will you do about it then?
/r/becomeaman27/01/16 05:30 PM
1

just dont ask me. i gave you a chance and you blew it already. my way of holding people accountable is that if you arent, i stop wasting my time with them.
/r/becomeaman27/01/16 05:29 PM
1

I just posted an update on the series.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/16 10:21 AM
3

I agree with you, it doesn't work. I had accepted like 10 mentoring requests, and ALL of them were people that dropped out after a few days. Like, they would promise to sign up for the gym and get back to me, and then never hear back from them. Even this guy i wrote something challenging him, and he wrote around it, clearly not wanting to make himself accountable for shit. I think all these people seeking a mentor just don't want to take responsibility for themselves, and saying they need a ment…
/r/becomeaman27/01/16 10:06 AM
3

I asked you what had you done, and your goals, and you failed to deliver. Even your goals aren't concrete. Lose 10lbs by when? The others are vague useless crap you can't hold yourself accountable to. Make it concrete. Frankly, you aren't serious about being held accountable. Go do some real shit before you waste other people's time. There are tons of guides on the first steps to get out of it and clearly you haven't even looked at them. Do you even lift?
/r/becomeaman27/01/16 08:23 AM
1

We only allow people to advice that have read the Course Prereqs. You clearly haven't, and have mixed in good insights with blue pill stuff your hamster feeds you. It does sound like you have a great husband that just gets it, and that you work hard to do your part in the relationship. I think probably /r/redpillwomen is a sub where this stuff fits better, so I encourage you to repost there.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/16 08:20 AM
2

what work have you done already? what are your goals?
/r/becomeaman27/01/16 07:08 AM
3

This is very good advice. There is a lot you can do in a dominant way. You need a break? Instead of saying "Honey i don't want to cum yet" and pulling out, manhandle her a bit, shifting her position, and pulling out as you do it, then talking dirty and then keep on going. This gives you a break but in a way that while you rest, she gets more turned on wanting your dick, and when you come back in, she will feel the need to cum, and will act more towards it (instead of it being your job).
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/16 02:34 PM
3

Read SGM. You don't have to do the crazier stuff. But it has good stuff on how to hold frame in the bedroom in a way that will make her cum very quickly. Your psychology will focus less on making her cum (beta) and being a caveman (alpha), and she WILL cum for that caveman. There is stuff you can do to make her cum just on ONE trust. It really works.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/16 02:33 PM
3

A lot of them aim for looks that do not fit my style or age. There is too much stupid crap too. It is like everything, filter to find the valuable stuff. I do like the basic stuff on how to fit clothes properly, and also some of the guides for my age. I've found some good suggestions for good value big items and such. I bought a nice leather jacket following some of their suggestions on how to pick one, and it has gotten me soooo many compliments from women it is crazy, really crazy. I've done s…
/r/askMRP26/01/16 02:26 PM
1

Planning something to face discomfort is a stoic exercise that I find very useful.
/r/askMRP26/01/16 02:17 PM
1

You have to lead ALWAYS. Good leader don't have to best at everything. Thinking you have to makes you a bad leader. Good leaders are good because they have a vision, but they delegate to others in ways that work very well. Heck, if your wife is doing a good job, do notice how it adds to your vision and reward that. We can't tell you what to delegate, and the MRP is not about micromanaging everything. Fighting over stupid ship is losing frame. But the point is that it adds to your vision, and she…
/r/askMRP26/01/16 12:44 PM
1

I've reread your post, and I agree with what you said, i was just clarifying. The point isn't too look "fashionable" as in what TV says you should look like. That is seeking an image outside yourself to please others, and is weak. However, there is value of understand how your body and your clothes interact with each other and make sure they give a coherent image where the clothes add to you and you add to the clothes. That is what is alpha, and what attracts women.
/r/askMRP26/01/16 12:36 PM
2

Everything worn has to be done with intent. That is how you make style. It is too easy for beta men to fall into a trap of lazyness when dressing with stuff that is ill-fitting, or fashion choices out of a teenage idea of coolness. That is bad. These men look like grown-up teens. Often focus only on what the wife will like, which is the same mentality of kids whose mothers would choose their clothes for them all the time, so they seek that validation. What is good is every item you but you do it…
/r/askMRP26/01/16 09:24 AM
1

Is your claim that by having others perceive me better that will provide (psychological) health benefits? Or is your claim that it will affect how I perceive myself and therefore provide (psychological) health benefits? Both.
/r/askMRP26/01/16 09:19 AM
1

Why do you feel uncomfortable with getting women to communicate with you in those raw ways? Smell and touch are essential for game and communicating alphaness. Have the frame that when they do, you aren't uncomfortable and can manage it alphaness. That is an internal change you need to work on. The way to make your wife swoon IS to make all women swoon, period. Anything else is oneitis and very beta. Women do want a man that could cheat. Read Rollo on this subject. I think a lot of beta ideas ar…
/r/askMRP26/01/16 09:17 AM
7

I used to think just like you. It was just my hamster telling me to be lazy about how to dress. But i started looking around, and realize it is just like the same research i do for anything else. Self-improvement is in all areas. Learning how to dress well for your style is an internal thing. The internal changes include, first, budgeting time for your own well being, improved self-confidence, and a more coherent image of yourself. The outward changes are you look better, higher SMV, and get a n…
/r/askMRP26/01/16 09:15 AM
7

Kegels. It makes your dick harder quicker, and give you more control when you come.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/16 06:14 AM
1

i will when im done with the series. i still have some more topics to discuss.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/01/16 07:11 AM
6

create purpose
/r/askMRP22/01/16 06:59 AM
3

why does it matter she brings it back? is she the judge of who can be on facebook? ignore, laugh. read nmmng and then wisnifg.
/r/askMRP22/01/16 06:56 AM
2

we cant see through all the bullshit. only through the bullshit people reveal.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/01/16 06:54 AM
1

Princess Leia is the counselor in that scene.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/01/16 06:12 PM
3

This is a great point. I find that journaling, a Stoic exercise, is very good for facing your feelings.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/01/16 04:37 PM
1

Ask any hero. They will tell you they felt fear. And they faced it. That is bravery. Being weak is coming up with excuses to not face the fear.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/01/16 03:33 PM
5

its a shit test. if you comply like a little beta that she can control, she might let you have sex with her. your frame has to be one where you have sex when you want, such a horny caveman she cant delay him. with that said, i do enjoy giving massage, but i do it from a frame that her body is mine and i am playing with it because i like to. i do it for myself and it is fun foreplay. but this wont work in response to your wife's request that is about who controls things n
/r/askMRP17/01/16 06:44 AM
4

Yes. Read NMMNG, follow the activities. in it, one of them VERY important is to connect with male friends that you can vent with. It is ESSENTIAL that kind of connection for you to feel alpha. Those friends will help also with other things as you transition and improve your life.
/r/askMRP14/01/16 01:01 PM
1

if you accept their judgement as something you mist fight against you signal their judgement matters to you and that they have that power over you. why give then that much? often just showing w actions you are so self assure their picking on you is childish is the best way to establish your frame. picking on you is just a form of shit test to establish social hierarchy and should be handles as such.
/r/becomeaman14/01/16 12:00 AM
1

You will get your ass kicked. Accept that and tap often. At the beginning all you have to aim for is to keep calm and try to figure out how they are kicking your ass.
/r/askMRP13/01/16 10:21 AM
1

They say you can train focusing Intensely, Realistically and Safely. You can choose at most 2 of those, but never three. Different martial arts make different choices regarding to this. I suggest no matter what you do, if you want to improve your confindence, choose one where Intensity is an important focus.
/r/askMRP13/01/16 09:34 AM
1

If you dont know what you want, join an MMA gym. They have all sorts of classes, and you can explore them that way.
/r/askMRP13/01/16 09:30 AM
1

Do something with intense sparring. Not just pretending to react to pre-agreed circumstance. Something with an intense opponent that you don't know what they will do and is trying to win. BJJ or Boxing are good for that, but Judo, Wrestling etc too. What matters is you stick to it. The reason i recommend this is that really going at it can be scary, and some tough guys can be intimidating. But you get used to it, you start to improve, and they respect you. And that does wonders for your self-con…
/r/askMRP13/01/16 09:21 AM
1

Fantastic post.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/01/16 08:38 AM
2

spam. click report.
/r/becomeaman08/01/16 09:53 AM
4

They can't force their opinion on you unless you let them. The fact that they try to force their opinion means they are insecure about them. Confident people don't need to change the minds of others to feel good about themselves. Frankly, ignore, or just say you agree to disagree, go broken record. If the issue doesn't affect you, why give it your time? If the conversation irritates you, end it.
/r/becomeaman06/01/16 12:11 PM
4

Change your mindset. The goals for now isn't to get laid, but to practice initiating sex. Start with low goals, this week initiate once. If you do it, then give yourself a nice small price (buy a good beer or something). Next week, initiate twice. Ramp it up steadily somehow. If you do initiate the number of times, congratulations! You are showing Outcome Independence, so you are kickingass. This sounds strange, but disconnecting the sex as the goal is a mental trick to reprogram your brain to h…
/r/askMRP05/01/16 12:25 PM
1

There is a book written about the issue of motivation that is so good I feel it should be on the side bar. It is called "The War of Art" by Pressfield (not to be confused with The Art of Way by Sun Tzu). The focus is on creative fields (writing), but the stuff it talks works for everything. Waiting for motivation is just a bullshit excuse to not be disciplined.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/01/16 10:36 AM
2

Because when the First Mate fucks up, the responsibility to fix things land on the Captain. The captain is the only person in the ship who can't blame anyone else for the fuck ups. The captain can and should take away responsibility from dangerous crew members. The error lies in the captain in trusting the whole ship to someone not ready to take responsibility for it.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/01/16 09:55 AM
12

He is just bitching he did something he didn't want to, and then, how he didn't get approval from his wife for it. Covert contract. He is ruining his own christmas with his resentment, it isn't his wife's fault.
/r/askMRP25/12/15 09:22 AM
1

Is your goal to increase the quantity and quality of sex? If so, read mmslp, and budget more energy and time to initiating.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/15 05:15 PM
1

Accept women bitch. And learn how to respond to the bitching.
/r/askMRP22/12/15 11:16 AM
1

Are you so scared of her that non only you feel obligated to follow her commands, but even are afraid of following unspoken commands? The problem isn't the kitchen, is you are afraid of her feelings, of not having her approval. Ignore, read more, focus on your well being. If this is bothering, go do something productive for you instead of cleaning the kitchen.
/r/askMRP22/12/15 11:16 AM
3

The way you handle is ignore the tantrum, and enforce the consequences.
/r/askMRP22/12/15 11:13 AM
1

If the guy doesn't have the frame to ignore, he most certainly doesn't have the frame to pull off A&A, and the A&A might come off weak. I think this happens often when we see guys saying "I tried A&A, but wife is calling me on it, or shit testing more. What do i do now?". THe problem is the lack of frame, and women smell that very well.
/r/askMRP22/12/15 10:43 AM
1

You should write a whole post from that perspective. There is a lot of need for that in the community: too many men come, get to the anger stage, and feel they need to be jerks and boss the wife around because of covert contracts. This makes things worse, makes them see petulant and weak. Leadership is something else all together, and the navy vocabulary might help highlight that.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/15 08:37 AM
1

This belongs more in askmrp. Read MMSLP, it has some guidelines about how much sex is reasonable, and why i is. I don't seem to have the desire I once did. Why is that? If it comes from covert contracts and resentment, deal with that. It if comes from porn abuse, deal with that. If it comes because you aren't attracted to your wife, then increase the dread level. If it is something else, talk to a doctor, not to us, we can't tell if your T levels are fine by reading what your hamster writes. Is …
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/15 08:35 AM
3

In latin america and many european countries is quite common. By law, everyone has to have two last names. Usually, the first last name is the most important, the father's, the second is the mother's. Sometimes when people from there travel to the anglosaxon countries, this is very confusing, as people think the paternal last name, the most important, is the middle name, and omit them. Some people add a hyphen to clarify this as a way to make sure the paternal last name isn't omitted, because it…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/12/15 09:30 AM
1

Btw, getting butthurt about something so insignificant is weak as fuck. Treat it as she was flirting, hint at sex you had after te wine tasting.
/r/askMRP19/12/15 07:40 AM
2

This deserves its own post. Too many in the anger stage of the transition think they have to act like the boss instead of the leader. I always tell others the captain works harder than anyone else, and it is the only one that can't bitch about it, nor can blame others. This pictures captures that very nicely.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/12/15 03:24 PM
9

Part of me wants to distribute the text excerpts because she deserves to be shamed Don't. Alphas don't create drama like that, that is what women do. I'll miss the food and constant sex but it is not worth the stress. Live your life with an abundance perspective. You will find better food and better sex, because she was just one woman of billions.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/12/15 02:27 PM
1

I agree with that. You dont have to leave just because she shit tests. You handle it like a champ then get back to your stuff. However, if yoh are tempted to argue, by all means leave. It is better than grtting into her frame to engage her hamster.
/r/askMRP15/12/15 05:34 PM
-1

BPP knows all the books. I see no point in giving dogs dog training manuals hoping they start doing tricks.
/r/askMRP15/12/15 05:32 PM
1

This belongs in askMRP. This stuff: "social media-attention craving, mindless, parasite who is completely oblivious to her problematic behavior." is irrelevant to you. Ignore her if she doesn't add to your life. You can't save your wife from that if your wife decides to engage and play into her drama. You stepping into the drama between two women like a white knight is going to burn you with both. However, there is a line where you do intervene. You are the captain of your ship. It is ok to have…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/12/15 03:43 PM
2

You change first. If she then shows interest in changing herself, you can give her a book. But if you do it before you are successfully captaining your ship, it is a beta weak supplicating thing where you want her to change to make you happy. SHe will interpret it as a victim puke, will think you weak, and will refuse to change just to test your shit, and you won't be ready to handle it. tl;dr: you change yourself. stop worrying about her changing. it is the only way she will want to change.
/r/askMRP15/12/15 03:31 PM
1

As soon as she unwrapped the RedBull, that pussy flooded like Niagara falls knowing what I had in store for her. Brilliant.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/12/15 03:23 PM
2

The less you care what she thinks of you, the more you will trust yourself, and in turn, the more she will trust you.
/r/askMRP15/12/15 03:21 PM
4

Many wives tend to see a husband walking away from an argument as a win for her Why do you care what she thinks? Is she the judge of you? If so, you are operating from her frame. Walk away when you want to, go do something nice for yourself, come home on your own time even happier than before, let her hamster run wild.
/r/askMRP15/12/15 03:11 PM
1

I rarely, if ever walk away from an argument or an ongoing shit test I disagree fundamentally to this. You go where is best for you. You dont stay to prove anything to her, that is accepting her as the judge of you, and is operating from her frame. You do as you want. If things aren't fun at home, it is perfectly ok to just go meet friends, go to the bar, etc. Withdrawing attention is always better than fighting. Sometimes children misbehave just to get attention. Even arguing is a form of atten…
/r/askMRP15/12/15 03:09 PM
2

I wrote a whole post about apologies, including a section of how to apologize like a man.
/r/askMRP15/12/15 11:07 AM
1

One of tonight's favorite conversations: Her: (we should do things my way) Me: One of the main things I did wrong before was listen to you. Her: No, I always told you to initate sex more often. Me: And when I did, you said no. Her: Yes, but you should have just pushed through that, like you began doing. Me: So I shouldn't listen to you? I think this conversation is the best example I've seen so far why talking to women is engaging the hamster, and actions are the best way to communicate.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/12/15 08:49 AM
2

Some mods wanted to give her a chance, thinking she was just going through some sort of anger stage, and would come around.
/r/askMRP14/12/15 11:53 AM
1

You also have the worse kind of oneitis. You've been together for very little time, and seek validation from her, and when you don't get it come running for a sub for married men. The fact that you think this plate is like being married signals clearly your problem is needyness, no frame, and oneitis. Read NMMNG right now. You are textbook needy.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/12/15 09:12 PM
1

This doesn't belong here. You are in a 3 month relationship, that isn't an LTR or married. I was upset that she is not being too excited that I am going over to their hous This is beta as fuck. You are seeking validation. Read the books NMMNG and WISNIFG. Keep reading TRP. MRP isn't the best forum for you. Bro, do you even lift?
/r/MarriedRedPill12/12/15 08:01 PM
2

Thanks for letting me know. We had given her way too many warnings for way too long. Now she has been Banned in MPR and askMRP as well.
/r/askMRP12/12/15 06:03 PM
3

I wrote this post about how to lead a woman that doesn't let you. Talk less, act more. If she is running her mouth, don't engage. Stay strong, maintain frame. It is the only way she will trust you frame.
/r/askMRP11/12/15 09:20 PM
-1

The fact that you feel you need to answer to her at all indicates you are operating from her frame. Set the standards of the relationships you want. If she doesn't meet them, next. If you give in, you tell her she has power over you. In the future, she will use it more and more, and eventually, she will hate you for being so weak. AWALT. Now, this reaction of her is standard to dread. Act as if she didn't say anything. Still initiate sex with confidence, and when she denies, go do something else…
/r/askMRP11/12/15 10:18 AM
1

She loses her shit if she sees another woman interested in me and gets mad at me for it. She verbally says she's pissed at the other woman but it becomes clear throughout the day that she's actually pissed at me as well. When this happens I can pretty much guarantee there's not gonna be any sex that day and she'll act like a bitch. Sounds great. This is a shit test, she is trying to see if you are man enough, or if she can intimidate you to pretend you don't have balls. The fact you are afraid o…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/15 03:40 PM
3

The answer to all those is that because you tried your way for all those, and now your marriage is unhappy. So you have two choices. Stick to your guns because you are insecure and dont want to feel you made a mistake, even if it leads to separation. Or try to change yourself to see if it improves things. We don't have to convince you or anything. You choose what you want to do. Note: it is much much easier to just stay stubborn thinking you know how the world should be, and the world, your husb…
/r/askMRP10/12/15 12:30 PM
2

Why not everybody get both? Do you have to choose between air and water? It is quite simple, actually. You can either be angry that world isn't what you wish it was, and keep acting as if it was. And see where your marriage is from that point of view. Or you can try to understand how it really is, and act from that. One way will make you feel entitled. The other will help you act in a better way with concrete positive rewards.
/r/askMRP10/12/15 12:28 PM
3

The Vampire has been hamstering the same thing for weeks and weeks. She is a late but strong entry to the hamster of the year awar. Or she is a giant troll fishing for attention. I don't think there is anything we can say to change her mind because she doesn't want to assume responsibility for how her controlling and manipulative attitude is ruining her marriage. I respect her choice to ruin her marriage, and hope the husband stays strong and plans so he doesn't get divorce-raped.
/r/askMRP10/12/15 12:21 PM
1

Horse are very strong animals, they can crush a person any time. When you walk into a corral, you can see the horses. The meek ones give certain signals that they submit immediately. Those are lame horses usually, and don't ride very well or fast. The strong ones test you more and are even more dangerous. But if you act decisively and confidently, they are even more eager to submit than the meek ones. There is no equality in the relationship between a horse and its rider. But there is a form of …
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/15 08:58 AM
3

If you are bothered by how she reacts to you, it means you are looking for her approval, which means you dont' have frame. She is mirroring just to test your frame. Do the changes in your life for yourself, not for her. Only when you internalize this, she will trust the changes.
/r/askMRP10/12/15 08:45 AM
6

"It's the top position, I want to be the most important one! Why should he get to be just because he has a penis?" Btw, she actually said that here once, just like that. That is why i told her to go to RPW or be banned. She then deleted her history.
/r/askMRP09/12/15 03:17 PM
6

She went to RPW because in the end, i told her if she didn't, we would ban her here. I'm not sure if she is doing it to go through the motions and then come back here, or what. But if she went to RPW without being open about it, and you ban her, then for sure, she doesn't deserve to be here, she just did it to keep trying to argue how she deserves to be the captain.
/r/askMRP09/12/15 03:10 PM
4

She was clearly seeking validation both at RPW and MRP. I told her this in private, that that was my suspicion. She then deleted her messages, then went and told her husband she was in MRP. I suspect she was playing some deep manipulation on him, trying to get validation, for him to then see it. And when i called her out on it, she freaked out. If this is how she handles problems in her marriage, no wonder why they are unhappy.
/r/askMRP09/12/15 03:03 PM
1

It is ok to be angry. Accept it. And then use to think what concrete actions you can take about them. If the only think you can think of is to yell, scream, or argue, i'm sorry, but you are having a tantrum, and just lust frame. I'm not against raising your voice as part of coherent communication, but too often, we just do that, and end up in a stupid argument match like a woman. THat is not right. When in doubt, take that anger with you, and use it for dread. Go get beers with friend.
/r/askMRP09/12/15 03:00 PM
4

Thanks for letting us know. Her husband came here later, and clearly, he was stuck in the anger stage, and has work to do. I think here men that own their shit, can improve their marriages. I think women that own their actions can go to RPW to improve theirs. This thing of crossing over is just weak stuff, trying to blame the other for the problems.
/r/askMRP09/12/15 02:54 PM
3

This is very good stuff. You should comment on how you make it work for Married game, and make a post of it.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/15 01:37 PM
1

I don't know all the details, just what you shared. But it sounds like you own all your choices, including the bad ones, and stayed strong, handled the consequences, planned like a leader, didn't whine like a victim. You handled it like a champ.
/r/TheRedPill09/12/15 12:46 PM
3

In fact, it is fucking smart to admit when shit hurts. You don't bitch about it, you admit it, and take care of the hurt, and heal, and come back and keep going. This guy did exactly that, and he isn't weak for admitting this was hard to TRP.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/15 12:43 PM
1

Why are you so popular with TBP? A few users have created a whole mythology around you, with a life story and such that is totally insane, inconsistent and hilarious. I'm pretty sure some of the users there masturbate to pictures of Will Riker and scream 'BPP' the whole time they do.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/15 12:36 PM
10

In animals, the one that withdraws eye contact surrenders. Just confidently making eye contact at key moments is very powerful. I'm willing to bet that many times when women don't know why they are so hot about some guy, it is that he is dominating with the eyes.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/15 12:11 PM
1

Anything particular about how to adapt it to MRP game?
/r/MarriedRedPill09/12/15 12:09 PM
1

I think he is saying that you should add a few sentences adding value by giving context of how it fits in mrp. We don't allow plain links to make users contribute a perspective.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/15 02:23 PM
3

Because most police side with the woman. There are tons of examples in TRP of men that called, it was obvious the woman attacked him, and the woman would claim she hurt her nail while scratching him and he goes to the pokey. The only way is if you have witnesses or if recording is allowed where you live to verify your story. And still, you might spend the night in custody and be falsely accused criminally.
/r/askMRP08/12/15 01:55 PM
3

that's plausibly deniable in case your wife calls you out on it? No. You OWN it. Denying you are a sexual being is beta. You see a hot woman on the street, and wife calls you on it? Communicate that "yes, she was hot, and i checked her out" with A&A or Amused Mastery. How do you do it in a way that isn't so overt that it's incredibly obvious you're flirting? You go as far as you feel you want. For example, just saying hi to waitresses, doing a bit of polite small talk is a good place to start. Y…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/15 10:33 AM
5

Something I've been thinking about is how women are horny, in the sense that it is in their nature, as opposed to that they become horny or that we make them horny, as if it was a state of mind. Women love a high value man that can see their sexuality right through their facade. This makes them more comfortable with it. To them, it feels as if they get turned on in a mysterious way, but in reality, by them sensing our strength, they just feel permission to release their sexuality to an alpha. Th…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/15 10:08 AM
1

Sex god method. It is kn the sidebar.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/11/15 12:42 PM
1

MRP is something you practice and make yours. All those hypotheticals and talking about your experience in theory is just your hamster preventing you from taking the tough steps.
/r/askMRP21/11/15 06:41 PM
1

I agree fully w FD. You are asking about how to see things from her frame so you do the bare minimun. Women smell that mediocre shit from a mile away. Be the best you can be Independent of her. That is what will keep her attracted. Your hamster tells you you didnt reveal Your lack of frame. Your post screams you are fully in her frame.
/r/askMRP21/11/15 03:18 PM
2

When the wife hamsters, we tell her she needs to stop hamstering and own her shit. When the husband hamsters, we tell him he needs to stop hamstering and own his shit.
/r/askMRP21/11/15 02:45 PM
2

Women always shit test about stupid shit. AWALT. You are failing shit tests by getting pissy. This is why she shit tests sooo much. Stop getting butt hurt by the shit tests. Embrace them, they are a feature of man-woman relationships. Enjoy them. Only when you start enjoying the tests, you really start passing them, and she starts trusting you.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 09:04 PM
1

Because you look for her approval, she can't trust you. Look at the problem, own your shit, handle it all. Say "Babe, i'm handling it".
/r/askMRP20/11/15 09:02 PM
3

I would think that I've proven myself with the changes I've made by now This is the problem. You still want her approval. She won't give you your balls because she never took them away. They are right there between your legs, and all this time you are barking at her thinking she has them. I wrote a post about "How to lead a wife that doesn't let you". Read more of the sidebar. I think you need to review NMMNG as well. You are fucking up more than necessary. A leader looks at his goal so others f…
/r/askMRP20/11/15 09:00 PM
0

Sounds like you are in a good place. Have you read SGM?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/11/15 08:56 PM
1

Those are requiered reading here in MRP. LTRs are advance mode. No wonder you are having difficult if you haven't studied the basics! Look at our beginner's guide to decide in which order to read them.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 02:14 PM
3

Focus on those concrete household duties because they are part of your vision. When in doubt, go do something good for yourself or for your vision. I overcame so much frustration in my transition by installing shelves, working out, etc. It is a great way to reprogram your brain for seeking her validation (which is her frame) to focus on what you think it is important (your vision).
/r/askMRP20/11/15 02:03 PM
2

So weak, so weak. You value yourself based on her approval. So fucking weak. Reread NMMNG and do all the activities. You aren't red pill, you are just having victim pukes in every shit test she throws.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 01:51 PM
3

she doesn't like 'all the power plays I've been attempting Think about this. Her frame is she is the decider of the power dynamics in the relationship. It's going to be a busy weekend.. When she brings that up, ignore it. Talking about power dynamics is useless. Just go do something more productive. Act like you know this kind of talk is useless (because it is), and go do something nice for yourself instead. The key message is not you want to fight her, she can do whatever she wants. But you are…
/r/askMRP20/11/15 01:48 PM
1

Yes, that's difficult to break. Only if you choose not to. Frame is 100% in your power. Have you read WISNIFG? NMMNG? I think the problem is completely you, seekign her validation, thinking her judgement matters, being insecure and afraid of her emotions.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 01:10 PM
3

Clearly each have their own issues. But mixing them up here only increases their blame game. When she posted, I focused on telling her the shit she had to change, and forget about him changing at all. Now that he is posting, i suggest we tell him the shit HE has to change, and to never expect her to change. ANything else is just feeding his hamster and her hamster, making their problems worse.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 10:37 AM
1

I grew up with a PTSD father, but I'm not equipped with any working strategies since he handled it by never being home. Then good thing you aren't your father. Look at your issues, grow, become strong, and captain your way.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 10:35 AM
1

Your analogy isn't right. You never burn the ship. You can stop ashore and kick out a crew member that endangers the others, and sail on without them. These are hard decisions to make. You must make sure you are a strong captain that has considered all options, and can do it without resentment, only with the well being of your ship and crew in mind. This kind of choices is why being a captain is so difficult.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 10:33 AM
2

or a BPD lurker...
/r/askMRP20/11/15 10:30 AM
5

Also abit selfish to leave a depressed person. B It isn't selfish. You are just being captain-save-a-hoe. Reread NMMNG. That is your problem. You can't fix this girl.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 09:38 AM
2

It is hard to know what you did right or wrong, as everything you type is from her frame. You keep thinking of her feelings, her point of view, etc. Nowhere you talk about what YOU want. However, watch what they do, not what they say. She takes me to the bathroom and fucks the shit out of me This is a good indicator you did something right. Now it has gone a week and no more sex yet Have you initiated at all? What happens when you do?
/r/askMRP20/11/15 09:38 AM
3

You are totally in her frame. That is why she is ahead of you, because you choose to play her game. The problem is not her, but your lack of frame. While you keep seeking validation on her and looking at what she says, you are fucked. Only when you find you vision and focus on yourself she will start to follow.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 08:57 AM
2

Who cares what she reads. You have t read the basicd yet. The one that isnt doing his work is you.
/r/askMRP20/11/15 07:08 AM
3

She found mrp because you fucked up. You havent even read all the beginner stuff. You think this is about teaching your wife her place and punishing her. It is so pathetic. What are the problems in your marriage you want to fix? If it is leadership, the problem is you. Lack of respect? You. Weak self image? Your own fucking issue. Needing validation from her to feel good? Your weakness. Getting pissy and all those problems worse. You lack vision. Your actions focus on her always. You are beta as…
/r/askMRP20/11/15 07:07 AM
1

For her to respect you all you have to do is respect yourself. Again i ask: what is the problem in your marriage? Dread is about about respect. Dread is about tingles. To lead well you have to focus on your vision, NOT on teaching her her place. Not to be controlling just because you are insecure and it makes you feel powerful. You know that kind of boss that acts all bossy and angry in an incoherent way to feel strong and nobody respects? That is what you are doing right now. Be the cool headed…
/r/askMRP20/11/15 07:02 AM
1

I seek out women who have issues and somehow subconsciously decide to fix them. This is part of seeking approval, actually. Work on NMMNG and WISNIFG, it will help you with that.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 09:37 PM
6

I need to do something fast, even if that means grabbing the kids and burning the ship down to build a new one. You can't fix her crazy dude. Her crazy is hers completely. All you can do is lead your family to protect your daughters. Priorities in order: the well being of your daughters and you. Then, only then, her well being and your marriage. Talk to a lawyer now. Tell him all that. Prepare for this. Look into Borderline Personality Disorder. If that rings true, send me a PM.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 07:23 PM
10

Dread is not for that. It is not to punish her for being hot. That kind of thinking is oneitis, insecure and comes out of beta resentement. Dread is to make her desire you sexually to improve the quality or quantity of sex. Why are you doing these things? What is it in your marriage that you want to fix? If what you want to fix is your own self image, it has nothing to do with her. If what you want to fix is her self image, it has nothing to do with this sub.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 03:25 PM
2

But she didnt hide her actions. She told you to come here. I think she came here thinking she could manipulate us using her feelingZ and then we would take her side. That might have been for validation, but it is still manipulation. She needs to fix her shit. And you are fixing yours. Read on Frame and Oak Moves. Pass shit test. Keep growing strong. This is good for both.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 03:17 PM
1

She'll either fall in line or get nexted for her unicorn flavored dictator BS. Yup. But that was always what was at stake. It has nothing to do with the pill, and all with she deciding if she wants to improve her marriage or not. Her solipsism was too strong, i doubt she will do that.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 02:01 PM
0

What the man can do: pass shit test, don't let her shake his frame. What the woman can do: stop being so controlling and manipulative. What makes it worse: tell the woman the man has to change, especially when it is based only on what the woman says in MRP.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 01:48 PM
4

That was my reading too, from the beginning. This was just a hunch, and we had some mod discussion about it. I didn't have evidence, so we let it play itself out. But when I saw her braging how she is deserving captain, and she had an SMV of 9.5 10 years ago, so it still counts, and she was a perfect unicorn that didn't need to change. well, i knew her motivation was just manipulation, she wasn't really interested in understanding. I called her on it on a PM, saying: I'm going to be even more fr…
/r/askMRP19/11/15 01:27 PM
1

You are going into her frame because you are thinking about how does your actions make you. That is, implicitly, you seek her approval. Your frame is you do things because you like them. Sometimes what I really want is sex. If she enthusiastically offers a BJ instead because she is sore, it seems cruel to push for physically uncomfortable sex. If you think this is the real reason, make a joke of how you made her all sore with your caveman stuff, and then, enjoy the BJ she gives you. Or get lube.…
/r/askMRP19/11/15 12:09 PM
4

The consensus was that you were doing something wrong. I disagree. All I read was her hamster hamster, saying he was a dick, and she saying she wants to be captain. The rest was feelingz because she isn't in control anymore. From all that hamstering, it is impossible to know what is he doing right or not, but clearly, she is feeling some dread. We all know how women act during the transition, it was all textbook stuff, and I'm surprised so many users believed her she is a 9.5 unicorn and her hus…
/r/askMRP19/11/15 12:03 PM
1

Own it. It doesn't change any of your actions. Keep doing what you are doing, because it is good for you. This stuff works even when she knows. All that push back are just overt shit test. Handle them. I didn't need to hear your side of the story at all. I had guessed it correctly through her hamstering, even if she tried to hide it.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 11:59 AM
3

I love it when both TBP and us agree on something.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 11:17 AM
1

That is the problem. That was the problem in the oatmeal incident. Read WISNIFG right now. It is the book you need.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 11:16 AM
2

This happens all the time. A user comes thinking his situation is very very special and requires very specific advice. He posts about it, and it is all classic mistakes, all deal with in the beginner's guide. This reveals the user hasn't done the basic reader. So we advice him to STFU and READ. If the users DOES that, he will see how the problem is not the details of how he talked to his wife, but the whole frame of communicating with the wife. It is hard for you to see, and it is hard for us to…
/r/askMRP19/11/15 11:15 AM
2

I can't fight back. Work on your frame. You are missing the point completely.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 11:10 AM
2

Everyone has an ego man. If you attack someone, they will probably defend themselves. This is because you don't have frame. This is an internet forum. All you have to do to not feel attack is close your eyes. That is all. The parable of the man with frame A man is happily walking through the park, enjoying the beautiful weather. A bored punk-ass teenager sees him happy and screams at him: "You are a faggot!". The man waves at him and says "Good for you" and keep walking happily. Morale Having fr…
/r/askMRP19/11/15 11:09 AM
3

You felt defensive because you have no frame. What have you read from the Beginners Guide? You need to read NMMNG and WISNIFG right now. You keep fucking up your marriage because you haven't read that. Also, why did you create another account besides the Oatmeal thing? Clearly you were honest about it in TBP, but not here, why are you not owning your shit?
/r/askMRP19/11/15 11:05 AM
2

In the future, when you catch this stuff, send a message to the mods. It helps us a lot.
/r/askMRP19/11/15 10:57 AM
2

Another great post by Sorcerer. I would like to add that any user that is interested in this, should look into stoicism. It is essentially a philosophy about how to use the optimal LOC to be happy and productive.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/15 10:44 AM
1

This should be upvoted more, as they key really is there. Here is what I think: she is testing his frame to see if he is really alpha. She already started minor sexual refusals (the ones discussed in that post). Now she is doing shit tests. The answer is to NOT go Beta. Don't. If you do, you fucked up.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/15 10:41 AM
2

This is known as dread. Take it easy on the changes, but firm and unmoved.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/15 10:38 AM
1

Do you want to be seen as a man with integrity secure in himself and his ability to bring women, or as desperate teen that gets giddy excited about porn? If it the latter, don't message me again. You are just yet another immature child that wants to stay that way while playing man on the internet.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/15 05:45 PM
2

What i'm doing / trying to do now is be the man I should have been all along... focus on improving my SMV... improve my social standing to what it was before or even greater... keep working hard at work... keep studying... get a social life outside of her... Good. Keep doing that. And shut up. Whenever you tell her you are working on doing those things, she trusts you less and less, because you were supposed to all along. It is like the waiter that keeps coming to your table saying "Your meal wi…
/r/askMRP18/11/15 03:50 PM
1

Since the summer is so far away consider having an alpha friend with more privacy than you to order the book for you, and you pay them. Or have him buy the digital copy, and you split the cost. Or whatever. There are many options. Why delay becoming a man? Work on all aspects now. regularly send me nudes of my female classmates ;) Btw, this is not alpha at all. It sounds rather childish, to be honest. I don't need to brag to anyone who I bang, or how hot they are, it is a bit silly. All it takes…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/15 01:13 PM
1

I'm sure you can pirate them in the usual sources. I can't tell you where, because I'm a mod, and i can't help with that kind of thing. If your problem is you can't read a book without your parent's permission, then, you are still a child, and have much to work on to become a man. Why don't you solve that problem first? Do you make your own money? Can you order things online with your own creditcard of paypal? Do you have your own bank account? If not, get your own account, and start saving mone…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/15 12:01 PM
2

She coupled the ladder to the sex. All you have to do is separate them. You do the ladder because it needed be done. And you have sex because you want to. Take her coupling both as a joke, as playful flirt, and move on.
/r/askMRP18/11/15 09:48 AM
5

Talk talk talk. It only makes things worse, because she will now not trust your changes. Big beta mistake. It is better to demonstrate with actions these things, than to promise them ahead.
/r/askMRP18/11/15 09:46 AM
1

I put it there. I learned a lot from Occam.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/15 09:43 AM
2

It is heavy at times. And it never ends, if you are challenging yourself, it will always be heavy because you are always improving, and improving is hard work. Because it is heavy is why it is worth doing. I train BJJ. I'm one of the smallest in the class. I'm crushed constantly. It if brutal. I do it because it is brutal. I'm improving. The thing is that because I challenge myself at this against stronger opponents, off the mat, i feel stronger, more confident. It is the same with all challenge…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/15 09:43 AM
1

Outside of leading and holding frame, Is there anything I can do to address this specific issue? Holding frame is the key. The thing is that by bringing this incident, she is testing your frame. It is a classic shit test trap: if you address the specifics of the test, you fail the test, because you allowed to be tested, and she thinks you don't have frame. Act, don't talk.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/15 09:16 AM
2

Why are you trying to go into her frame? Keep dominating, keep doing what you want, she is submitting to your needs. As long as she is making you happy, enjoy it.
/r/askMRP17/11/15 07:52 PM
2

Do you enjoy this kind of sex? If so, then congrats, you are doing well. If not, dominate to get tje sex you want.
/r/askMRP17/11/15 06:28 PM
7

"I'll think about it" And then bring the ladder because it is rational solution to a real problem. Then fuck her like a cave man.
/r/askMRP17/11/15 06:25 PM
1

I was going to take my kids outside to just remove them from the situation and do something fun with them. Instead she ended up going outside and I had a fun time playing with the kids, giving them dinner, and putting them to bed. This sounds like you handled it well. If she refuses to leave, YOU leave. Heck, i think it is better always to leave first, as it leads to dread. This is not week. Children understand that the mother is being irrational. Take them with you and have a great time with th…
/r/askMRP17/11/15 01:52 PM
1

there comes a point where that Beta wants, sometimes adamantly insists, for his own burden of performance to be replaced, or at least handicapped, by a woman meeting him half way. This is very deep. Another great post.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 01:44 PM
1

But also, show your approval when they do alpha things. This is important because the way children get beta is they seek the approval of women from early on (mother, female teachers).
/r/askMRP17/11/15 01:42 PM
0

Answer the following questions: Are you a good alpha role model? Do you do manly things with them? That is all you can really do to teach them. If you have doubt about any one of those, then, work on that. We are here because we didn't have good role models. It is our job to BE those role models for the future generation.
/r/askMRP17/11/15 01:15 PM
1

If he is as socially inept as it came across, then he'll have no idea that we were talking about him. Remember this all came from a woman that despises him and thinks she is the captain. She looks down on him for being a beta. She kept saying he was a "dick" without much detail. Of course she was going to say he is socially inept. That is part of the solipsism. All the info we got was from her own hamster. When women have to captain, they do this. They disrespect their men like that. No matter w…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 12:45 PM
1

A woman who can be assertive wouldn't be doing that. Her marriage and parenting will improve if she can learn those skills. I agree with you. But i also think this is very difficult for women because they are women. It is against their emotional nature. Asking them to change is useless, and will be received with resistance and hamster. So instead, I accept women are like that, and deal with them as such. RPW is virtually worthless. The funny thing is that RPW thinks MRP is virtually worthless, a…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 12:38 PM
1

The day I get engaged, the first thing I do will be to order all those books. until then, I will refrain frim giving people advice. You have the order all backwards. First, you become a man, a leader. If you do so, then when married, you will act the right way. You don't have to wait to become a man until you get engaged. You don't have to wait to start reading books until then, in fact, it might be too late. It is like saying "I will start training martial arts IF i'm accepted to fight in the t…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 11:31 AM
1

Being an oak being strong and comforting, unshaken but inviting.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 11:24 AM
3

Her feelings are hers. You can be an oak out of generosity, but you can't be reactive. It makes her not trust you. It also makes you fall for their manipulation. Read WISNIFG and NMMNG.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 09:55 AM
1

This is sooo beta. It reveals you haven't read the basics from the sidebar, and don't understand the basics, and are doing it all wrong. The key is to make a clear distinction between your shit, and the shit you let her be a part of. Playing guitar with her thinking that being "nice" will increase her attraction to you is the definition of beta thought patterns. I'm going to delete it. We don't allow people to advice if they haven't read the prereqs, and you clearly haven't. Please, read MMSLP a…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 09:53 AM
1

This dynamic we all engaged with her here is detailed here: http://theredpillroom.blogspot.ca/2012/08/the-male-social-matrix-back-to-sandbox.html It is the classic thins when a woman is allowed in a male space, nothing more or less.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 09:20 AM
1

The mods had given her many warnings telling her if she wanted to understand the pill as a woman, to check out RPW first. This woman rejected the Captain/FO model, actually saying SHE was the captain, and she doesn't need to change anything in her actions. This is all against the guidelines here. I was direct I suspected she was posting this crap hoping her husband would read them, so she could manipulate him. Reread all she wrote, and it will be make sense if you assume this motivation behind w…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 09:19 AM
1

This is like a dog trying to read books about how to train dogs. But note that she refused to go to read RPW. She was doing the same mistake beta men do: they think that by talking to female friends and acting like a woman, women will like them. This wife claimed in that threat she thought she had the right to be a captain because she mutinied. SHe refused to go to RPW after many many suggestions by several mods. All while bitching about her mutiny fracturing and her marriage becoming unhappy.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 09:14 AM
1

To be clear, the line was when she said she deserved to be the captain and her husband didn't. I suspected this all along (or that she was a TBP troll of sorts), but we gave her the benefit of the doubt as an experiment. Once she revealed that she thought she had the right to be captain because she mutinied, it was very clear what her purpose here really is. She thinks she is a captain, and thinks that she can now sit at the captain's table as if it will help her consolidate power to keep her mu…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/11/15 09:10 AM
1

Women are welcome in the MRP network as long as they follow the Captain/FO model. You refuse to, and dismiss self improvement for yourself as if you are above it. This is all standard hamster stuff. We detailed the guidelines you violated in a PM. We had given you multiple warnings to go to RPW, and you dismissed them because you see yourself as the captain. I understand you are confused with the guidelines because some mods put some misplaced trust in your intentions and gave you a chance you d…
/r/askMRP17/11/15 09:02 AM
1

It can be slow, but the mindset is you are the captain, you always have been. A captain can take things slow while he inspects his ship before departing to new waters. A captain can take time to reacquaint himself to his crew. But a captain is always the captain. You didn't stop being the captain because you were drunk. You didn't stop being the captain because your FO did the work for you. You were drunk. And now you sober up and get back to work.
/r/askMRP17/11/15 08:48 AM
1

in askMRP we use the same rules, except we are more lenient with people that haven't read the prereqs yet and are having victim pukes. Several mods did suggest you to go to RPW in several occasions, and you dismissed them. Btw, this thing you did is classic behaviour of women in a male social environment, and well understood in the red pill: http://theredpillroom.blogspot.ca/2012/08/the-male-social-matrix-back-to-sandbox.html
/r/askMRP16/11/15 09:21 PM
1

I did ask you to go to RPW if you were interested in Self Improvement and understanding TRP. Otherwise, it would confirm my suspicion you were using this sub to covertly send messages trying to manipulate your husband by using this forum to play emotional games with him, and use the users here for proxy arguments. With regards to the guidelines you violated, https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/2uvjxz/guidelines_and_faq_updated_feb_52014/ in particular, i was citing stuff linked from…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 09:07 PM
1

I do feel an affinity with this woman because I would really like to put together a total program of marital self improvement. Right now we have it down fairly well what men need to do and how to motivate them to do it but motivating women to change and improve is a huge piece of an incomplete puzzle. I think this is worth pursuing and valuable. With that said, this woman might not be the best case-study. Remember, she posts in TBP and such, and even thinks she is the captain and all that. her q…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 03:48 PM
4

You are doing alright with the shit tests, and have a good mindset. Reinstate myself as co-captain before earning my way into the Captain's Chair. I think "earning" captaincy is an important distinction. The Captain's Chair isn't an automatic entitlement and I need to demonstrate not only that I'm capable but that I'm in fact the best person for the job. This i diseagree with completely. You are the captain. You always have been. You were just not doing your job. Nobody took away your hat, you d…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 01:37 PM
3

Every time you fail a test, she will throw 10 more because you made her feel insecure. But the best is to keep going forward, one at a time. When in doubt, STFU. "are you trying a new strategy" "In love and war everything is allowed." and slap her butt. "you are being selfish", "you just want me for sex", but those are easier to STFU or AA for me. Good job. These are good signs. I didn't expect her to confront me overtly so early. It can be off-putting to not have enough time to get strong and c…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 01:15 PM
2

Girls hate alpha posers. This is a very good point. Wife is testing to see if he is for real, or posing. This is a shit test. OP needs to pass this.
/r/askMRP16/11/15 12:43 PM
4

Giving the wife reading material is beta as fuck, it is a covert contract essentially. There are a handful of users that have pulled it off from alpha successfully. But too many come here very early in their transition and do it hoping wife will change, and that will fix their problems. This is the wrong mindset. A good rule of thumb is if you are in /r/askmrp, for sure, you don't have a strong enough frame to pull off asking her to change by reading a book.
/r/askMRP16/11/15 12:34 PM
15

Read WISNIFG. You don't have to answer to any questions she asks. In fact, you are in her frame when you assume that you have obligations to tell her. The problem is if you explain what you are doing, you engage her hamster, and it comes off as validation seeking. Quite frankly, I wouldn't explain anything. Just say "Yeah, lifting makes me more horny.", pick her up, and make a joke of it with Agree and Amplify. Make it funny and playful, so she joins in your fun frame. One thing I've thought abo…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 12:29 PM
6

I disagree with you, I think you are in her frame. I see hamster hamster hamster everywhere. She is clearly being bossy and feels entitled to it. In the post she says: I don't think I'm a harpy But somewhere else she says What, though, if I'm a better captain? A penis does not a captain make. She has a wrong idea about her SMV, thinking she gets some priviledge because she thinks she was a 9.5 10 years ago. She blames the husband for the troubles, only referring to him vaguely as "a dick" with n…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 11:37 AM
1

Also, in several posts she has said she thinks she is a better captain, and that is why she won't let him captain. I bet that is the source of all problems.
/r/askMRP16/11/15 11:31 AM
1

Yes, women's SMV lowers drastically with age. There is something called "The wall", which is about 30, where it starts to go down a lot. A lot of women that have very high SMV get used to control men using it, and post wall, they turn bossy even to compensate for their lowered SMV. It often leads to unhappy marriages and men finding the pill.
/r/askMRP16/11/15 11:27 AM
2

This is the source of all the problems. You think you are the better captain. He thinks he is the better captain. Both feel resentment over the other for this. This is why equality doesn't work. So, you tried captaining, and you felt resentment for it even. He did too. Clearly that didn't work, otherwise, he wouldn't have found the pill. Let's be honest: the problem is you being bossy and entitled. That is all. You can lurk here all you want, but it won't help with that problem. Go to /r/RedPill…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 11:24 AM
1

The thing about this approach is that even when she faces consequences for her bad actions, your frame isn't one of blaming, it is one of just withdrawing trust and responsibility to get shit done the best way. And even if they don't like the consequences, they respect that eventually.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/15 11:16 AM
3

Standard shit test. Listen to how they act, not what they say. Besides that, amused mastery. "No woman wants a man who is cocky. They is not sexy nor is it attractive." Give her a sexy smirk and pat her in the butt, and a wink, and walk away. s this sense of fear that i have inside that i may actually leave my wife for a woman who actually responds to me common? Yes, this is getting rid of oneitis. It is a good thing. The point is that by getting rid of oneitis, you are more honest, and the valu…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 11:00 AM
2

I wrote a post about this. Don't focus on blame, just on solving the problem so it doesn't happen again. Besides that, be nice about it, as it rewards her owning up her shit, which makes things easier for all.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/15 10:55 AM
1

Why does this matter in your situation? You are operating from her frame completely. You don't know the basics of TRP. That is the problem. If you don't understand this in your life, what makes you think considering hypotheticals of a different situation can help you? Here is what I think: You have oneitis and are beta, and don't know how to pass shit tests. That is all. You can work on all that by reading the sidebar. The question is: will you? Don't come here to play reddit puppet, it hurts yo…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/15 10:44 AM
1

This belongs in /r/askMRP, not here. Have your read anything in the beginner's guide? If not, THAT is the problem. This is a classic shit test, easily deflected. Read WISNIFG.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/15 10:42 AM
1

You are not cool by cheating on your wife, you are not a good father for cheating on your wife. You need to have the balls to live life how you want on your own terms and stop being afraid of your net worth and start living life correctly. I disagree with this. Let me clarify. I don't think cheating is a good idea for me. But I don't think we can judge him for that. If he cheats from alpha, and owns up to the consequences, good for him, even if i disagree with his choice, it is his choice. If he…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/15 09:57 AM
7

This thread is being attacked by a vote-brigade. I have locked it. Update: unlocked now.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/15 09:40 AM
1

You got it all wrong dude. The problem is not the lack of come back. You are operating from her frame, trying to convince her from within her frame. THAT is why she isn't attracted to you. For example, you could have just said "Ok, fine with me if you want to be celibate now. There is the door." That is all. You refuse to be in a sexless relationship, hold no grudges, and no resentment. But you are honest about what you want and are ok with the consequences. Here is the issue: i suspect you can'…
/r/askTRP16/11/15 09:23 AM
2

I'll retell your story: Dude gets oneitis, girl realizes it, so denies sex because he is a beta bux. End of story. Solution? Stop the oneitis. Heck, even NEXT, you aren't in an LTR yet.
/r/askMRP16/11/15 09:20 AM
2

This is known as the drunk captain, and the First Officer leading without really wanting too. Then the captain wakes up, and wants to have power back. The First Officer doesn't trust if the captain is sober yet, and the captain recents the FO for that, which makes the FO trust less and be more controlling, which leads to the captain becoming angrier. There are two ways to end this. 1) the Captain gets control against the FO's will. If the FO is strong, then this is quite messy, with both getting…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 08:39 AM
3

A very good guide to the hamster is when people post and post and post hoping the OTHER person would change, then argue why this or that has to change, etc. Instead, go to /r/RedPillWomen , and examine yourself, and see what you can do to improve your marriage. Everything you post is hamstering as if you were perfect and don't have anything to change. Clearly that mindset isn't leading to a happy marriage. So why don't you change what you can change, yourself? Seriously, /r/redpillwomen, and wor…
/r/askMRP16/11/15 08:31 AM
2

To be clear, /u/theultmatecad doesn't claim to be Hard Core Red. That is a very rare recognition given to very few users in the sub by the mods for the hard core red pill mindset and contributions. You can blame the mod team for that tag if you prefer.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/15 08:22 AM
1

Talk to your lawyer about this. State boundaries about what is appropriate to discuss in front of the children, with the aid of the lawyer. Ask the lawyer how best to communicate these.
/r/askMRP10/11/15 10:54 AM
2

Who cares what she thinks and what her friends think? You can't lead your life by seeking validation from her and her friends. The question is what do YOU think? Read WISNIFG now.
/r/askMRP10/11/15 08:34 AM
1

I second this assessment. This is a victim puke, and there is a lot of misunderstanding on how things work, probably out of resentment.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/11/15 08:31 AM
5

You are the captain. You are responsible for ALL things to run the ship successfully. ALL things. ALL of them. You constantly inspect the ship discovering things needed. You work harder at this than anyone else in the ship. Internalize this. Even if the chef dies, you as the captain are responsible to make sure the crew eats somehow, even if it means assigning others that don't know how to cook. Even if the navigator falls over board, you are responsible to take the ship back to port. From that,…
/r/askMRP09/11/15 03:42 PM
1

You realize you can order ebooks you can read on your phone or computer, right? Heck, some of the books are on audiobook. And many of them you can get through libraries. This is a bullshit excuse. "I don't want to work to improve myself, save my relationship for me". That mindset is what makes you weak and unattractive to women.
/r/askMRP08/11/15 09:37 PM
4

If you don't want to do the minimum effort to read books, then it means you don't care about improving the relationship, and you aren't welcomed to post here anymore.
/r/askMRP08/11/15 09:34 PM
37

Lawyer up first of all. Ask the lawyer all that. We cant advice you legally.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/11/15 11:13 AM
3

A Captain has to know when is his turn to micromanage, and when can he delegate and trusts. For example, one way is to assign a task, explain the desired result, and not care for the method. If results are met, good. If not, clarification is asked, and a reevalulation of delegation might be needed. THe rest is irrelevant. If you are micromanaging about things that don't matter, then you aren't being a good leader. If you are micromanaging about things that DO matter, then ignore her complain, yo…
/r/askMRP05/11/15 02:56 PM
6

Another entry for Hamster of the Year 2015.
/r/askMRP04/11/15 10:41 PM
1

crazy i just looked at your history. I believe the expression is "The pot calling the kettle black".
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/15 03:38 PM
5

Lifting is not a hobby because it is part of the stuff all men must do to improve themselves. Reading is not a hobby for the same reason, it is lifting, but for the mind. Videogames is a hobby, but a beta hobby, one that does not increase your SMV or alpha confidence. In a videogame you can spend hours understanding a character to fight better. You could easily spend 3 hours a week studying that character, kicking ass online. Or, you could spend those 3 hours in a boxing gym, actually learning h…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/15 12:23 PM
1

Something that helped me understand it was to realize women don't care about us, they only care about how we make them feel. Another thing to challenge my old ideas was that I realized that in my refusal to understand that women appreciate me for who i am is an unprovable assumption, and frankly, all about me and my weak needs. By working on becoming strong and valuable in my life, i stopped needed that kind of approval from women.
/r/askMRP02/11/15 12:17 PM
3

/r/redpillwomen is the right forum for this kind of discussion. The hamster is strong here: I don't want my son's wife to control him, so i want to control his life before he is born to make sure his wife is someone i can control. This, gentleman, is how women and society make men beta. Mothers planning to control their boys as pawns.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/15 11:12 AM
1

I also recommend "A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy". It is a modern concrete take on stoic techniques. Think of it as a modern manual on Outcome Independence.
/r/askMRP01/11/15 11:49 AM
3

There is a lot more beyond that. It is all about you finding your manly vision by challenging yourself. Those components are just starting point for it. Once you do that, you will know without our help where you are taking your life. Start with the basics of self improvement. By doing them, they will change you, and you will find your own vision. If I fight for it in court, I could walk away with decent money Talk to a lawyer about your options. Make an informed decision of the cost/benefits of …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/11/15 11:45 AM
3

Become the best man you can given your disabilities. Own them as part of your strength. As Tyrion said: "Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you." When you do this, instead of feeling sad for yourself for your disability (which is a waste of energy), you accept what can't be change, make it part of you, and focus on the rest. You are not a victim. You are a hero in your life. I hate dating. I really do. Explore why. unde…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/11/15 11:42 AM
1

I think learning about the strategies to pass shit tests is like learning kung fu, and just having a strong frame that is an integral part of you is like not needing to doge bullets.
/r/askMRP30/10/15 10:41 PM
1

Day Game by Roosh. It will both work for dread and your SMV, but also later if you are single in a year. I'm not a fan of Robert Greene (I find his stuff a bit sophomoric). For sure Meditations is great just to build a strong frame. Also, you might want to consider on that line "A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy" for a more concrete stoic reading. I can suggest more if you discuss what ideas aren't sinking in yet.
/r/askMRP30/10/15 10:37 PM
5

The beginners guide has different paths. Not all start w NMMNG. But when we see guys hamstering full of resentment because their wives dont make them happy, the first step has to be to get rid of those covert contracts first. Also, NMMNG is not quite RP and it is often easier emotionally. Finally, many of the activities in NMMNG are like very low level dread focusing solely on self improvement. Dread is more powerful when done without butthurtness. So those are good training wheels.
/r/askMRP30/10/15 08:21 PM
1

Read carefully. internalize. read again. ask questions. There are no quick solutions, only steady work to change your mindset. When users come here trying to find a quick solution, invariable, they get frustrated and more angry, and make things worse. Their wives end up respecting them even less. This self improvement is for life.
/r/askMRP30/10/15 03:44 PM
1

how did you get to see it? i thought it hasn't been released yet? And also that they needed money to complete it.
/r/askTRP30/10/15 10:43 AM
2

If you only do baby steps, you will get baby results. Be a man, do the hardwork like a man. Stop the excuses. All this stuff, ALL of it, is answered in the sidebar books. The beginner's guide explains it all. You just choose not to read the book with the answers to your problems.
/r/askMRP30/10/15 10:12 AM
3

Skipping dread steps is a form of victim puke, and super beta. When I see people skipping the steps, it is super easy to always find resentment from covert contracts, which means, they are beta as fuck, and THAT is the real problem in their marriage.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/10/15 09:34 AM
3

Did you check out the guide for beginners? Parf of becoming a Man is that you stop seeking validation in others, and learn to trust yourself. We see you as a Man with capital M, even if you don't believe it yet. We will treat you as such because it is what is best for you. We won't hold back, and tell you when you are lying to yourself to stay BP. We expect you to be a Man, and Own Your Shit, as that is the crucial way to stop being insecure and trusting your vision. It is ok to make mistakes, b…
/r/askMRP30/10/15 09:29 AM
1

I dont know. Why dont you call and ask? This is an easy problem to solve, you are a man, why don't you solve it, and start doing the hard work needed to improve your life.
/r/askMRP28/10/15 05:30 PM
0

So, you haven't read the basic most essential prerequisites required here then.
/r/askMRP28/10/15 03:50 PM
2

Do you lift? What have you read from the sidebar? The thing is you might be acting like a butthurt bitch. But the fact that you don't know, and that you trust her opinion, that is the real problem. You need to become confident enough if you are acting correctly or in a weak way, independent of what she says. She can say whatever, but you know what it is. This is "Frame". It will take time to build it. You need to do all the basics. Read the prereqs, get guy friends, lift, etc. But with all that,…
/r/askMRP28/10/15 03:11 PM
-3

Never agree with future promises of sex like that. That is negotiating desire. It is beta as fuck. Your frame is you will take sex at all times. You want it both now AND in the morning. So there is no negotiating to be done. Get busier. Become more distant overall. What level of dread are you on right now?
/r/askMRP28/10/15 02:54 PM
4

Why confront the guy when it is your wife that is being disrespectful? By confronting the guy you tell your wife she can pull you into her frame, and manipulate you. She will feel SOOO desired by both of you after that. Why instead not do consequences to her?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/10/15 09:49 AM
1

Good to know! Please, share a FR from how the pill is different for birds, and in antartica!
/r/MarriedRedPill28/10/15 09:47 AM
2

When you have a good frame, you don't struggle anymore to maintain frame, the frame maintains YOU.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/10/15 09:09 AM
4

You realize we have a beginners guide and a list of readings, and even a wiki to answer your question, right?
/r/askMRP28/10/15 08:06 AM
12

Every time somebody posts how to stay motivate, the answer always is: it isn't about motivation, it is about discipline. You don't need to game hard, just have the right frame, and the frame does it for you.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/10/15 08:02 AM
1

A good captain assigns responsibility and tasks depending on the needs of his ship and the abilities of this crew members. This is an important leadership decision nobody can do for you, because only you know the needs of your ship, and the abilities of your crewmembers.
/r/askMRP28/10/15 08:01 AM
1

We can't lead your life. Are you here to be reddit puppet, or to self improve?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/10/15 07:59 AM
2

A to Q1: You are the captain. You have expectations of what is needed to run the boat well. Make them clear, and be clear what are the consequences you can use. For example, changing the budget, doing stuff without her, etc. The one you can always do si withdraw responsibilities. Yes, this is more work for you. BUt you also signal her you don't need her in your life. The classic example is to use her budget to pay for a nice hot maid to do the cleaning. To Q2: No. They can do whatever the fuck t…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/15 09:02 PM
1

Don't just read NMMNG. Do the activities. Get make friends. Write up the shit to be honest to yourself. Get rid of the weakness. Do you have a good group of male friends? Make yourself accountable on all those fronts. Stop thinking your happiness depends on her. Make your own.
/r/askMRP27/10/15 08:42 PM
1

Trying what?
/r/askMRP27/10/15 08:37 PM
1

If you continue victim puking without owning your shit and self improving, we will put you on the ice box for a bit. That is to make sure you stop your hamster for a while. My recomendation: post on OYS concrete things you will do for self improvement. Then don't post anything for a week, and in OYS, post to make yourself accountable, and then, improve more for the next week. And the next. Continue that until you have a good MAP going. Then shit will start to make sense. And then you will stop h…
/r/askMRP27/10/15 08:36 PM
1

But don't just victim puke in OYS. All you have done so far is victim puke. Go to OYS, and actually, OWN YOUR SHIT. Assume responsibility for your situation, assume responsibility for improving it. Stop blaming others. Stop being weak. This is not the right sub to act weak and be a victim. If you prefer that, go to /r/relationship. Here, be a fucking man, do constructive stuff. That is how to improve your situation, your life, and eve your marriage. The problem is you, your weakness. Stop being …
/r/askMRP27/10/15 08:31 PM
1

I was going to remove the thread, because this guy clearly hasn't read the guidelines or done the minimum work. However, some of the suggestions might enlighten other people here that are doing the right work. However, if I see the OP here again without doing the minimum effort, I will give him a temp ban. I don't like this cross posting to /r/family.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/15 07:52 PM
1

Your title reveals you are operating from her frame. "Sex is on the table" reveals you think she has the power over that. Fuck no. The correct mindset is you will get sex no matter what. She can choose to not have sex with you, but you move on then. She has no power over you if you have sex or not, only if she is part of that.
/r/askMRP27/10/15 07:50 PM
2

And if not, go to /r/canada. They are not red pill, but they have a red maple leaf there.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/15 07:43 PM
1

This is not a sub for quick answers. This is not a sub to remote control you into being a man. This is a sub where YOU do shit to man up and have a vision, and with that, you improve your marriage. If you are willing to do that, you are welcome. If you just want to be passive, you won't have the balls to make the tough choices for christmas anyway. What will it be?
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/15 07:38 PM
1

You mention a lot what others think, what you feel, what others say. What have YOU told him? what do YOU think?
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/15 07:36 PM
3

We do want to sound harsh. Whatever we say to him is less than the fear he has to overcome to confront his dad and finally be a man.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/15 07:35 PM
4

MRP is about changing yourself by yourself for yourself. That often is enough to improve a marriage. You have posted almost once a day here for the past week, complaining about your libido problems, your lack of leadership, your psychological problems. I'm going to go out on a limb and say you have some issues you have to deal with that are all yours. Even if you leave your wife, you won't resolve them, they will stay with you. In fact, from all you have said, it sounds like the problem isn't yo…
/r/askMRP27/10/15 06:50 PM
2

Remember, if he isnt doing this for himself, he might puke the pill, end up like Cypher, resent you. You can't control that. This is why it is better for him and for you he takes the steps himself.
/r/askMRP27/10/15 02:56 PM
2

Ha!
/r/askMRP27/10/15 02:39 PM
1

We set up the sub such that people couldn't just link to articles. The idea is we want each user to add some discussion and original ideas as well. In the future, please, don't just link, discuss in detail what you learned from it.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/15 02:20 PM
1

Why can't the sub be eye-opening and informative as well as kind and reassuring? Neo: Why do my eyes hurt? Morpheus: You've never used them before.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/15 02:07 PM
2

We haven't been very clear about this, to be fair. This started as a test, and has taken off. We are still trying to get a good sense for how to focus it. However, I do want to have all the quality contents in /r/mrp, and have /r/askmrp as just a place where we hose down people having victim pukes before they go to /r/mrp.
/r/askMRP27/10/15 02:03 PM
1

We have had so many posts lately about men finding unicorns... we should have a mud fight of all the unicorns. But don't let that fencing girl bring a sword to it! That, or add /r/unicorn/ to the sidebar.
/r/askMRP27/10/15 02:00 PM
2

I like this post a lot. However, I think saying that /r/mrp is for advanced people that get it, and /askmrp isn't for the others, is not right. Worse, I think it encourages people for staying BP. Everyone that can self reflect and own his shit should be in /r/mrp. Yes, especially beginners. They should be there, challenging themselves, improving themselves, thinking critically. /r/askmrp is only for people that want to play reddit puppet. We can slap them in the face, and hope that makes them st…
/r/askMRP27/10/15 01:57 PM
3

This type of questioning is popularly known as a Witchhunt. The haminist decides he is guilty, and she can't find any wrong doing, so she goes to extreme things trying to get something, anything. Nothing works, but she knows he did something wrong! The entire thing is a fishing mission A whale on a fishing expedition.
/r/askMRP27/10/15 01:24 PM
2

Give him NMMNG. Get him to join you at the gym. That is the best way to help him. Telling him what to do only feeds his insecurities, and keeps the weakness comfortable. Challenge him man up.
/r/askMRP27/10/15 01:19 PM
5

Your advice won't help him. You can't remote-control him, that isn't manly, and it means he won't have a good frame. Women can tell, and then only shit test even more. He won't have the frame for that, and will get more frustrated, and end up with victim pukes. You are trying to help him, but you might be actually hurting him with your good intentions. Besides, this means that we get her hamster to tell his hamster something, then his hamster to tell your hamster something, and then your hamster…
/r/askMRP27/10/15 01:16 PM
3

Once you stop blaming others for your situation in life, you feel empowered to overcome it.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/15 11:51 AM
1

He deleted the post already because we didn't, and instead, questioned his oneitis. Super weak.
/r/askMRP27/10/15 11:18 AM
2

crippled by fear of intimacy HB7 This is not a unicorn. In fact, it sounds like you have low standards, and oneitis. Here is a rule of thumb: if you come here saying you found one, you missed the point of what a unicorn is. THEY DON'T EXIST. Unicorn is just a reminder that you are deceiving yourself, that you have oneitis, and because of that, aren't thinking clearly. More about that here. A unicorn is an idealized fantasy girl. It's a girl who reflects your own weaknesses and beta desires. This…
/r/askMRP27/10/15 10:34 AM
2

Yup.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/15 09:15 PM
8

It is so obvious she mentions jeff because she knows Marc is reading and she wants him to feel jealous.
/r/TheRedPill26/10/15 08:35 PM
2

It is hard to pull off right sometimes, because staying quite while she rants without the proper body language encourages her. But once you have established a strong frame, is super powerful. Even without a strong frame, it is better to fake it with STFU than to engage her hamster.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/15 07:53 PM
6

We have users from all continents (Except maybe antarctica) and all major religions. It is stupid to focus on those differences, and I'm glad this community doesn't, because it doesn't add anything to the discussion of MRP. You can have a completely opposing view about the age of the universe than I, and I won't care in this sub. However, if anyone has a covert contract, or resentment, I'll tell them right away. Because the contract or the resentment is something you are doing against yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/15 07:45 PM
0

/r/thatHappened
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/15 07:38 PM
3

STFU is a very high level of amused mastery. Imagine you are the the president, and some one insignificant comes to guilt trip you into starting a war over nothing, then even makes threats, then tries all sorts of manipulation techniques. And you don't say anything, you just keep reading your papers. Ouch. It didn't even register to you. THat is how strong you are over that person. This doesn't mean that your suggestion to handle it isn't good, it was very good. But don't just dismiss AM.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/15 07:37 PM
3

Some women try to use feminist ideas to renegotiate this, where the man is responsible for all the manly stuff PLUS all the woman stuff she doesn't want to do. As OP says, the key is to reject her as the task decider, you use your values to decide, period. From that, you can establish the men/women divisions you mention as natural.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/15 07:35 PM
1

It is worst than that. He does react. He tongue kisses the dude!!
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/15 05:52 PM
1

STFU the ideal approach? STFU is good. It is even better if you go out and do something nice for yourself. Get a beer with friends. Go flirt. Go to the gym. Go out with the kids and have a blast. This serves several purposes: first, it demonstrates that you find happiness without her. This is very powerful. Second, it prevents her from reengaging (you are gone), so her hamster spins in your favor. Third, it programs your mind to not be resentful, because by giving yourself a gift (doing somethin…
/r/askMRP26/10/15 03:49 PM
2

"happy wife happy life" last night and I was like "note, that's emotional terrorism". "It is the other way around."
/r/askMRP26/10/15 02:52 PM
1

Yeah, it is weird when they start that, old BP me would get scared by it and everything.
/r/askMRP26/10/15 02:28 PM
0

Learn to ENJOY the silent treatment. It is a gift from women.
/r/askMRP26/10/15 02:22 PM
1

More seriously, there is something known as reverse-kegels that are better for men than for women. Those are very tricky to get right.
/r/askMRP26/10/15 02:02 PM
1

You know there are other things you can do to make her cum, and preferring a TV show over sex is weak as fuck, right?
/r/askMRP26/10/15 02:00 PM
0

Can someone explain the importance of initiating constantly, even when getting rejected? The idea is that she feels your limitless sexual energy, and her hamster tells her that maybe it is so much it might go elsewhere. So her hamster imagines some social validation for your SMV, which makes you more attractive to her.
/r/askMRP26/10/15 01:56 PM
1

Do Kegels to last longer. Besides, sometimes it is ok to not last, and just enjoy yourself. Just own it.
/r/askMRP26/10/15 01:54 PM
9

She just posted another update. https://archive.is/odNHc It is amazing how in it she both expresses resentment for him ending it, told me in two sentences that this relationship has no future and he isn’t interested in pursuing things any further; be it platonic friendship or anything else: so he basically told me to get lost. What a nice first reply that was…. but also she then at the ends somehow hamsters it out that she ended it with him. Ended it with Marc Oh, and she mentions a beta orbiter…
/r/TheRedPill26/10/15 01:47 PM
3

Did he win the fight? "Submission by tongue kissing"?
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/15 09:21 AM
3

My favorite part was "I was drunk enough to take him", as if being drunk makes you a better fighter, but then you made out with him. /r/thathappened
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/15 09:20 AM
2

I'm the primary caregiver for the kids because she works evenings. Talk to a lawyer right now about this. Right now. Documenting this would be crucial if you guys separate and you want to continue a good relationship with the kids. Don't procrastinate, inform yourself. Just understand what are the options and taking steps to improve the worse case scenario will help you with your Outcome Independence a lot. On a day-to-day basis, I don't know how to implement OI without just coming off as a dick…
/r/askMRP26/10/15 09:08 AM
2

I've had the realization that I could do just fine on my own, and that I would never want for sex as a single man. If this is your mindset, then your withdrawal is effective, and it might make sense to increase the dread to 9. However, if you feel resentment, then it is ineffective. You reported some other places that there might still be some covert contracts, so try working on those first for a while before escalating dread further. I know it isn't clear cut, but for some reason, women can sme…
/r/askMRP26/10/15 09:04 AM
1

Reddit is weird like that. When users get banned, they get a message saying they are banned. We never just ban users unless they are trolls.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/15 08:22 PM
1

Stay active by reading the sidebar and other stuff that adds to your life. It makes you a more interesting person over all.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/15 06:12 PM
2

You dont dread by pretending to have less sexual energy. You dread by having so much she worries you might use it elsewhere.
/r/askMRP25/10/15 05:51 PM
1

Not banned. We had a discussion but it wasnt really a trasngression. We know you were receptive and well intentioned. We try to be direct and transparent with users, and dont just ban for disagreements. Besides, even when people violate guidelines (you didnt) we tell them. We rarely use the ban. But i will delete this post because it isnt needed. Next time just message the mods. We answer always.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/15 05:42 PM
2

I can't help but be frustrated at her sense of entitlement. She thinks she's hot shit, and thinks I'm trying to "win" her. She can think that all she wants. Do you really see yourself as the price? While you resent her for being entitled, you will in some way crave validation for her, which erodes your vision of yourself as the price. Women smell that. The only thing I stand to lose are my kids. Talk to a lawyer right now. You don't know that. Figure out how to optimize your options in case that…
/r/askMRP25/10/15 02:15 PM
2

If you aren't interested in sex, she won't be either. That is your fault then. I'm guessing you don't have a porn/fapping problem, right? If you do, just get that in line. Remember, she has to feel your sexual energy to be so strong that if she isn't the best receptacle for it, her hamster will tell her you will find another. I'm completely turned off to the idea of her doing it because she's trying to keep me complacent There seems to be a covert contract hidden here somewhere. I'm not sure wha…
/r/askMRP25/10/15 01:23 PM
2

I do agree that our actions affect others and society. And it is important for each to consider. But here we follow what TRP says, which is, we don't discuss that aspect in this forum because it is too easy for it to derail discussions into moral policing and concerned trolling. Almost everything in TRP offends someone morally somehow, so very quickly it would become arguing about nothing. Instead, we say the pill is amoral. it doesn't mean your life should lack morals, but that the principles w…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/15 01:09 PM
1

Your timing sounds reasonable. Just to be clear, you already have many interests away from the house (Level 3), right? You are only talking about increasing that more, which is always good. And you have been using conditioning to demonstrate lack of time and interest in starfish boring sex, right? Your level 8 dread sounds spot on, you are doing this regularly, right? Just some additional comments about your situation: she's fishing for attention I don't want to give because it seems to be a one…
/r/askMRP25/10/15 12:48 PM
1

Which level of dread are you on now? How much time have you spent in each?
/r/askMRP25/10/15 12:18 PM
2

I dont mind morality debates about what is reasonable, but this is not the forum for that. Moral policing here is just a form of concern trolling. I can respect men that violate social rules. I place idividuality higher than social rules. with that said, you keep talking about his vows. Did you go to his wedding?
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/15 06:01 AM
1

This is what i think too. Those that demsnd societies rules to do what is good are often those that are afraid of themselves if the rules didnt exist.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/15 05:16 AM
2

Your morality is irrelvant to his actions. It is ok to agree that you think it is bad, but this is not the forum to discuss it because the pill is amoral. It just ends up in tone policing, concern trolling, etc. You being moral police is a small internet forum isnt going to prevent bank roberies.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/15 05:14 AM
3

Is it just opinion that you're a member of society to which you need to adhere to certain social norms? In TRP, one of the tenants is that those feminist social norms are what make men weak. The pill is all about rejecting the social norms such that each man constructs their own.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/15 09:02 PM
2

in most cases going so far as cheating means you'll blow up the marriage. As long as he owns the risks and consequences of his choices, who cares? He is a grown up. We can disagree with his choices and still respect that he takes responsibility over them.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/15 09:01 PM
1

You can still do the "dread game" without crossing a line that in most cases will blow up a marriage Each man gets to decide what is the level of dread they are willing to go to. Each man is responsible for that choice, and its consequences. The pill is amoral. What matters is that if an affair is from abundance mentality, it is alpha. Women much rather share a high value man that not have it at all. But the same affair if it comes from resentment, it is beta. The pill doesn't tell you if it if …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/15 08:59 PM
1

someone needs to call out cheating as unacceptable. It is ok that it is unacceptable to you. But you are not the judge of him, so why should he care?
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/15 08:56 PM
1

The pill is amoral. If you have a coherent frame for affairs, by all means go for them. As long as you have integrity with your own judgement, who gives a shit about the opinion of others. However, if you decide affairs are not good, then yes, don't do them. What matters is not arbitrary judgement of what is a good thing. Those are just way to impose society onto men. What matter is that each man is it owns judge, and that he is a tough judge to himself. If they do that, I fully respect their ch…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/15 08:54 PM
2

Hard Core Red is a bigger recognition than Approved.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/15 08:50 PM
6

I don't think MRP is about saving marriages. It is about married men that find the pill. A lot of bad marriages are to be blamed on weak men, and by finding the pill, if those men work hard, that is often all it takes to turn it around. But that is not the point of MRP, that wouldn't be Outcome Independent.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/15 08:49 PM
1

Going to high level dread without all the self improvement and doing all the stages is NOT dread, it is just being weak.
/r/askMRP24/10/15 06:51 PM
1

Too wordy. Weak too. In essence, you gave in to her frame because felt she judge you, and you had to justify yourself. This is all her frame, and that is why she doesn't really trusts the changes, so she will keep testing them. When you "say" who you "really" are, she trusts you less. It is so much stronger to laugh it off and ignore. Don't say who you are in response to her accusations, just ACT who you are, and ignore the accusation, or use agree & amplify or amused mastery.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/15 12:38 PM
2

The idea is that you improve yourself in all dimensions to be ready for the single's market. You don't comment on it, but those changes will do most of the communicating on your behalf, that without her realizing, she worries you might slip away from her. Only with that baseline the other stuff will make sense. Without that, you will just seem to her like an angry teenager. Remember, it doesn't matter what you think your SMV is, what matters is you improve it, it is the change itself that brings…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/10/15 12:35 PM
8

I will sumarize your logic: She isnt attracted to you. Instead of concluding that The problem is your SMV, you talk to her about her sex drive (negotiating desire). So of course instead of saying she isnt attracted to you, you listen to her hamster, and believe in it. You get butthurt and conclude that the problem isnt you, it must be hers and even chad. The question is are you chad? If not, then, the problem is you. What is your smv? Where are you on the stages of dread? Own your reaponsibility…
/r/askMRP24/10/15 09:00 AM
3

I think from all your comments the one you need the most is NMMNG. Dont be afraid of it, it is hard stuff to read, but if you inspect yourself whe you read it you will learn a lot.
/r/askMRP24/10/15 07:10 AM
6

She isnt a unicorn. You just have oneitis and are too needy. The problem is not her. Is you. Read NMMNG.
/r/askMRP24/10/15 06:32 AM
3

Why? Are you afraid of your wife, or does she make all the decisions for you?
/r/askMRP24/10/15 06:09 AM
6

Awalt. The problem is not her. Accept women are like that. The problem is your needyness. From your story i kept having to reread because you acted like a needy woman the whole time. Women and men function in polarities. You act weak, she will act strong. Bringing up all that stuff seeking validation is what repulsed her.
/r/askMRP24/10/15 06:05 AM
6

this is all BP shit. The problem is not her. She is not an unicorn. The problem is YOU. Your neediness. Betaorbiting her. Oneitis. Pleading to create attraction. Covert contracts. Hoping she changes. All that is beta beta beta. Why would she submit to someone so needy and weak as you. Go to the main trp sub. Go to becomeaman. Read all the sidebar. The problem is not her. It is your bp mentality. Why are you in mrp anyway?
/r/askMRP24/10/15 05:52 AM
1

You are officially nominated for hamster of the year award!!! You say you need her aproval to feel good about yourself. You then propose to behave like women to shit test her. BP all the way. You havent even read the prereqs. Weak.
/r/askMRP23/10/15 11:52 PM
1

I want to feel more desired is what a woman would say. This is a total covert contract whete your selfimage depends on her. Stop that shit right now. Read NMMNG before yiu fuck up a high sex relationship using beta logic.
/r/askMRP23/10/15 08:03 PM
1

Women expect men to initiate. Men initiate. That is all. Stop expecting women to initiate. It is wanting women to be like men. It is the worse of BP thinking and a covert contract.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/15 07:36 PM
2

That troll is a woman. Almost all the trolls that coordinate vote brigades at /r/TheBluePill are women. This particular troll is totally obsessed with BPP, and has created an imagined biography of him that they discuss in /r/TheBluePill. I'm pretty sure she rubs herself at night thinking of him and looking at pictures of William Riker.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/15 12:17 PM
2

This user is making some sort of fictional biography of BPP in /r/thebluepill, making up all sorts of shit about him that has nothing to do with what he posts. I think she is obsessed with BPP, she gets tingles, like a girl making a Justin Bieber collage. Anyway, just standard troll and vote brigading from /r/thebluepill, nothing new to see here. Just report and ignore, so they get bored.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/15 12:10 PM
2

The less attention they get, the quicker they get bored. Also, we are quite strict with bans when people are trolling here, so when in doubt, report, and we will look into it. They really hate that we ban trolls immediately. Often they first argue that they didn't do anything wrong, it was just a little bit of concern trolling, nothing more. We ignore. Then, they say they didn't violate the guidelines, so unless we prove it to them, we can't ban them. We ignore. And then they become like rabid t…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/15 11:58 AM
2

This is just a troll from /r/thebluepill. They use that sub to coordinate trolling. Since MRP is much smaller than them, we are an easy prey for their vote brigades. This was just part of that. They seem to be obsessed with BPP there too, I think he gives them the tingles. These trolls come here all the time, ignore them and report them.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/15 11:38 AM
1

look into /r/solotravel. They have tons of guides about exactly this.
/r/becomeaman23/10/15 10:40 AM
7

You laugh and make funnier faces. Why would a funny face ruin your frame? Why does it get to you? I suspect you are ignoring my main point, which is that the problem is not the mocking, but some insecurity you have. Unless you look hard and address that, no advice will help you, because THAT is the problem.
/r/becomeaman23/10/15 10:05 AM
6

Look into why it gets to you. There is probably some insecurity that is touching. Work on that insecurity. The reason why the mock you is because they detect that insecurity. If you have any weaknesses you can't change (like genetic stuff), then, do as Tyrion said: Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you. I usually agree and amplify. Because it doesn't get to me, my ego isn't hurt by that stuff, words don't hurt me if I don't let them, and my frame is one of having fun.
/r/becomeaman23/10/15 09:58 AM
1

I agree that motivation is just a bullshit hamsterian excuse to not do stuff. Discipline is everything. For those needing a kick in the butt for this, I recommend the book "War of Art" (not to be confused with the Art of War).
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/15 09:14 AM
2

The stated purpose of the sub is to discuss sexual strategy if you have found the pill while in marriage or an LTR. We don't preach Marriage or LTR. However, we do think that most of the problems in marriage are from lack of leadership, and the beta hamster of men blinds them from that. They end up blaming their wives or marriage as an institution because it is easier than owning their shit. In the end, if you are a leader in your marriage, and you do all you can for yourself, and from there you…
/r/askMRP23/10/15 08:17 AM
2

Improve everything you can first. Your marriage does suck, and most of it is your fault. Yes, there are problems and challenges with the institution, and it is ok later to discuss them. But while you don't even know how much you can improve it, your opinion is empty, probably based on resentment. Stop thinking what you will advise in the future if you haven't done your share. In the end, what you really want to teach them to lead their lives, and from that, they will make the right assessment ab…
/r/askMRP23/10/15 08:05 AM
2

The 2/3 rule of thumb is a simple reminder to not act needy. If you are a busy guy with a lot going on, it comes naturally without having to count. Besides, consequences are not covert contracts if you own the choice to do the consequences. The way to tell if something is a covert contract is if you feel hurt or resentful, and you act from those feelings.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/15 08:18 PM
2

The main event is a function of how hard the changes are on the relationship. It is one last check to see if the new you is for real or not. Since you arent living together you have more time for yourself and to change without impacting her too much at a time.
/r/askMRP22/10/15 03:41 PM
6

The problem is not the main event. It is you are insecure. If you have a secure frame regularly, there might not be a main event even. You have 9 months to establish it. That is more than enough. Stop being afraid of women, that is what drives them to do the main event. Read the prereqs, all of them. Read the beginners guideline for the order. Stop being passive, all the info is there. Lead your life by leading your self improvement.
/r/askMRP22/10/15 02:50 PM
2

A common BP trait is that when women become angry, we become afraid of their emotions. To pacify them, we buck, and apologize for stuff we don't mean. I've discussed how to apologize like a man in this post. The key is that men are the biggest judges of themselves. It is REALLY hard to be a good judge, but it is crucial. From that, when you fail, it is fine to own that mistake, and even make reparations and apologies. However, if your apologies come from outside accusations, or fear of them, the…
/r/askMRP22/10/15 10:54 AM
1

It is not your fucking problem if she wants to diet or not. If she wants accountability and support, she can find tons of apps for that. You can stay away from the house if her behavior is unacceptable to you. She is just using manipulation techniques to keep you engaging her hamster. Don't fall for it. There is nothing you can gain from engaging in this fight, so do stuff good for you. Stop being afraid of her emotions, her emotions are her fucking problem. why does this have to be so difficult…
/r/askMRP22/10/15 10:48 AM
1

Ha ha ha ha ha. If you had read a bit more here you would have known that was exactly how it would work out. The lesson: if you try to change women with words, you only engage her hamster. Trying to be nice "encouraging" her doesn't work clearly, so stop it. She doesn't want to change, and while you keep assuming responsibility for changing her, she will blame you for not changing. Forget changing her, change yourself, let the dread speak on your behalf.
/r/askMRP22/10/15 10:37 AM
3

I'll latch onto this to discuss how the term "vulnerability" is misused in general, and in that post in particular. The best clarification I've read of this is in the book "Models", however, I still think most blue pill people misunderstand the term, to the point that it shouldn't be used at all. Manson, in his book models, explains that there is a difference between bean weak and needy, and being vulnerable. Vulnerable in his book is essentially just having a strong frame with such confidence y…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/15 09:46 AM
2

Tone police it is. I do like a lot of the material in TRP, especially the older stuff that has now become classic. However, yes, there is a lot of angry stuff. I don't mind it either, I just don't find too much value in it now, but I understand this is part of people figuring it out, and sometimes I do find something interesting. All the focus on Dark Triad and such is a bit silly, but harmless. I see it all as training wheels in a bicycle. When I was a kid, me and my friends would discuss to de…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/15 07:40 AM
1

During the ovulation window: “Stay on target.” PMS: “You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. …We must be cautious.” During shark week, as a reminder for Outcome Indepencen when initiating: “Strike me down, and I will become more powerful than you could possibly imagine.”
/r/askMRP21/10/15 12:15 PM
3

Bringing her fishing hoping she likes it is a form of approval seeking. "Look at me, I do manly things, don't you like seeing me doing manly things?" which is the same as the child in the pool "Mommy mommy, look, i'm going to dive into the pool, mommy mommy, you aren't looking, look!". When you do that, she has two options. Either she acts like a mother, giving you fake praise "Yes sweetie, I'm so proud of how you gut that fish, very good", or she acts like a girly-girl that tests your frame by …
/r/MarriedRedPill21/10/15 07:41 AM
5

Should I avoid reading into it? Reading into it = Your Hamster. The problem is you are seeking approval. You expecting her to give you the ok for the sex you had is super beta. It is like the little kid saying "Mommy, did you see how I dove into the pool?". While you keep seeking this approval, insecure of what it means, she will not be attracted to you. Sex means sex. Drunken sex can be fun, and enjoy it for what it is, drunken sex. THe more in the moment you are, the less you think this someho…
/r/askMRP20/10/15 08:50 PM
6

The rule of thumb is it takes more than one month per year of marriage before things start to improve. You don't have a "talk" of expectations if at all possible. If you aren't regularly initiate sex with outcome independence, and you dont have a higher SMV, then your own actis will betray your words. Your actions communicate your expectations better than any words. Look into the stages of dread of BPP and how long he estimates before you reach the dread level of having "a talk".
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/15 01:41 PM
2

The way to not do this is to have a clear vision of how you want your children to be. If you think they should grow to be independent and resourceful, then, the only way to teach them that is to give them enough freedom to make mistakes, and own up to them. So you can't be all over them all the time, you need to give them space for them to learn that stuff. This also means they will get hurt more, they will be in more dangerous situations, and they will make more mistakes, often ruining stuff. T…
/r/RedPillParenting20/10/15 11:31 AM
1

You can change the message to whatever you like, sometime like "Incoming Shark Attack" is funny.
/r/askMRP20/10/15 07:27 AM
1

Look into Stoicism. A good concrete introduction to their brain hacks is "A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy". It will help you retrain your brain by focusing on what you control, instead of on the past which you don't. If Stoicism isn't your cup of tea, look as well into Buddhism. You don't need the hippy-dippy shit of it if you don't like it, but a lot of the techniques they developed are very concrete and secular, and are all about killing the rumination. Some of these tec…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/15 07:20 AM
1

Get me near a woman and I get clingy and shit. I had some traits of that as well. Know that is the main problem. Until you become free of that, your judgements of women will stem only from weak covert contracts that derive from that clinginess. That is, those judgmenets only make you more beta. Shut up. Focus on yourself. If angry or resentful, take time for yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/15 07:16 AM
1

Chew slowly. When you feel like gagging, do two things: First, do one nice thing for yourself, simple stuff, like taking time for yourself, going for a walk, read MRP stuff for an hour. Second, do one tough thing to challenge yourself. Go lift. Go run. Do pushups. Run some day game to practice cold approach. The idea with this is that you get used to controlling your life, challenging yourself, rewarding yourself regardless of what others do or the environment throws at you. You become self suff…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/15 07:13 AM
4

Focusing on blaming women and trying to change them is fruitless. Their hamster will just eat your logic and shit more hamsters. You will seem weaker and weaker trying to engage and change them. All beta men think they must change their wives to be happy. Instead, we are all about empowerment, focusing on what WE can change for Outcome Independence. Men solve problems, we don't bitch about how others aren't nice enough, that is what women do. So, just accepting we can't change women and instead …
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 07:33 PM
2

Can I do it while hanging onto my ex-slut wife? Can I let go of her past 40 fucks? It is up to you. You think you are shocked because of what she did. But AWALT. What is really shocking you is how you were in the matrix, you are still internalizing thing. Don't focus on ONE person in the matrix, focus on the whole thing. Once you have Outcome Independence, you will realize how you don't need her at all to be happy, and then, you will be able to be honest about how much she adds to your life, and…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 02:36 PM
3

Often, many men find the pill, then say they are better looking than their women, therefore, she should do as they want. This is a covert contract, weak and beta. The right framework for the OP is: if you aren't getting what you want, you need to change. YOU change. Doing the same isn't working, so CHANGE. Don't hamster out of the change, just fucking change yourself to change the power dynamics. Lifting is the simplest thing you can do to achieve concrete change. There are a lot of others. But …
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 02:29 PM
1

Exactly. But all those questions is she saying she does want that, she just needs to be pushed a little bit. It means she wants you to lead more. Sometimes just being a bit flirty to set the tone that you are just having fun is enough. Sometimes actions, not words are the way to convince her. Think of the game for single guys. You increase the kino and kiss. If she says she doesn't want to kiss but continues the kino, you kiss again. It is the same principle. Don't listen to her words, listen to…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 02:22 PM
1

Once we internalize that it is all about changing ourselves, our resentment and frustration dissipates and turns into power over our lives. And only then, we can lead like Alphas independent of how women react to us. And only then, women find us attractive.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 02:19 PM
5

We don't have the information you need to decide. So, either you are insecure, in which case there isn't enough evidence in the world to change your mind, or you have good reason to doubt, in which case, getting the evidence is the only way to resolve it.
/r/askMRP19/10/15 11:24 AM
1

This. Only insecure men do the monkey dance to figure out who is alpha. Why do you need to do the dance with a drunken idiot in a random bar? Why risk lawsuits or a night in the can? Is your ego that weak? Ignore, walk away.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 11:20 AM
2

I love all those "My Kung Fu is better than your Kung Fu" arguments. But in the end, knowing how to respond to violence is situational. Martial arts is just one small component of that. Weapons another. There are many others. The most important is to be mature and confident enough to read the situation and be smart. It is almost always better to just leave the bar with the drunken idiot, than to do the push-shove and then end in up in the can. This is MRP, we are more mature than high school kid…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 11:18 AM
1

The main goal is NOT to walk on eggshells when she has PMS, but to focus your energies to escalate more while she is on her ovulation window. The idea is that your first increase sex during ovulation, then more regularly the other days until you increase your count, then again some more during ovulation, etc, so you both get used to more sex regularly, but that you introduce the changes when she wants to feel your strength.
/r/askMRP19/10/15 11:12 AM
1

Use CLUE, track her mood with it. The app is good even for irregular woman, or on the pill or hormones. It just takes a lot more months of data for it to make accurate predictions.
/r/askMRP19/10/15 11:10 AM
7

I don't get it. You say you swallowed, but you haven't done anything, and not only expect her to change, but expect her to change her past too. The pill is about changing yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 10:37 AM
0

It sounds like you are just resentful for her past. You are blaming her for it, but aren't assuming responsibility for crap. Here we can't change the past, nor your wife. This is all about changing yourself. You haven't said anything about what changes you are doing in your life. We estimate at least 1 month per year of marriage before things improved. She complained about boredom, which means you need to alpha up. Instead, you are becoming more beta, with more resentment, weak mentality, wantin…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 10:35 AM
6

I just emphasize how this adds to my life. "No prob, it feels great when the kitchen is clean". You don't fight the compliment, but show her approval is not a motivating factor for you.
/r/askMRP19/10/15 10:10 AM
3

The problem is while you keep staring at her to see if she changes, you lack Outcome Independence. Without it, changing so she notices is a covert contract "She should be nicer to me because I'm doing all these changes". Expecting her to notice your 3 weeks (nothing really) of change is a form of approval seeking. Like "Mommy mommy, look how I jump into the pool! Mooomyyyy you weren't looooking" All these things are beta, and women have an intuition where they smell that stuff and can tell. Expe…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/15 05:12 AM
1

If she doesn't respect you, it is because you don't respect yourself. Why do you feel like you have to answer to her disrespectful tone at all? If she talks to you as a child, why do you feel like you have to snap back at her as if she was a mother, and you a resentful teenager?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/10/15 09:57 AM
2

This. Men that don't ask for direction do it because they are insecure. Men that freak out when they are lost is because they are insecure. What is unsexy is NOT asking for directions or getting lost. It is reacting to that with insecurity. A man sees a problem, he solves it calmly. That is leadership.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/10/15 09:55 AM
5

So, essentially, you haven't done the minimum yet to start passing shit tests. Why are you posting about how you can't pass them if you know the problem is not the test, but you haven't done your part yet?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/10/15 09:52 AM
7

You just started 3 weeks ago. MRP is about changing yourself, not her. While you try to change her, she will resist ONLY to test your frame. It is essentially a way to work from her own frame, where she rules thing. Focus on your frame, wait longer, shut the fuck up more, and lead with actions. Only then she will start following and complying more. In BJJ they always say you don't try to move your opponent, you move yourself. It is the same, you don't try to change your wife, you change yourself…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/10/15 08:18 AM
8

Your frame should be one of a horny cave man that wants sex all the time, does whatever in sex, and it is not stop. Don't deny her sex, that is what women do for control. There are plenty of other things you can do to her while you recover. Heck, sometimes focusing on her pleasure without covert contracts can be a lot of fun. If she wants more, you give her more. You want a frame of alpha abundance, you can't be satisfied, you are ready to fuck at all times, nothing stops you. Instead of talking…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/10/15 08:08 AM
1

There are shit tests, all of them. She is asking you to dominate her so she doesn't get distracted. Plow through in a friendly/funny/sexy way. Set the atmosphere. If you don't, then SHE is setting the atmosphere to unsexy insecure stuff. The way to make her secure, is you act secure over all these fake obstacles. Read in TRP on how this would be when you are single trying to fuck a woman for the first time. All these things are bullshit, listen to her actions, she wants sex. laugh it off. Read M…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/15 07:42 PM
1

Blah blah blah I have a weird woman, it isn't i'm not a captain, it is her fault she doesn't follow, blah blah blah. Weak sauce. AWALT. She isn't special, you are just weak.
/r/askMRP17/10/15 04:55 PM
1

Women flow into the shape of their men. When we say AWALT, we mean they follow the same fluid dynamics. But the shape of the container is the man.
/r/askMRP17/10/15 04:53 PM
1

To be fair, I don't think this guy's issue is he doesn't know the right martial art, or carries the right weapon. His problem is he buys into the frame of everyone around him, EVERYONE, women, drunk idiots, everyone. Even if you know the Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique, if you but into the frame of others, you will only be a stupid emotional idiot with no frame that gets belligerent over nothing. I would like to remind the OP that in Kill Bill, Pai Mei is totally unmoved and relaxed by…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/15 03:28 PM
2

From all your posts, it seems the problem is that you follow the frame of others: your wife, the drunk dude in the club, etc. Have you finished the Prereqs? Btw, I love martial arts, with a lot of sparring. I'm pretty sure I could handle any untrained unarmed idiot on the street. However, what I value from martial arts is NOT the technique to handle those drunk idiots. It is that by sparring several times a week, your confidence goes up immensely, and that makes your frame stronger, to the point…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/15 03:20 PM
2

Have you read WISNIFG from the sidebar? It seems like you haven't. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. You are a man.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/15 03:17 PM
3

Stop writing so much shit. It only makes your hamster stronger, and what you need forward is to stop the hamster altogether. Here is what you need to internalize: nobody cares about you. You are alone in this world. And that is a blessing. It frees you to be strong, to have a vision, to be a Man with capital M. From that vision, you make the hard choices. We are not here to help you. Not because we don't want to, but because, unlike what you think, we can't. All we know about you is typed by you…
/r/askMRP17/10/15 03:08 PM
2

Think clearly of your vision and your priorities. What is more important for you as father: to brush his teeth now, or to teach him about brushing his teeth? I know we all want both, but in parenting, often we have to be patient, because the real goal is not to get them to do what we want, but to teach them something, and that takes longer.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/15 02:19 PM
2

Women are afraid of these changes, and they sabotage them because they are afraid of change. This creates dread. Sometimes even small dread can make them freak out. We have seen many posts here of many women trying to block their men dieting, lifting, doing sports, or even hanging out with male friends. There is no rational reason for this, all those are healthy activities. Unfortunately, there are two things that can happen. Your friend starts to not give a crap and stand up for himself, or he …
/r/askMRP16/10/15 12:56 PM
1

We are on the same page. No offense taken.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/15 11:53 AM
1

Relax, you aren't any special, nor is your post, I have nothing against you. We do this all the time, it is just the guidelines. Just repost in the OYS weekly, and keep up the good work of self improvement. You are taking the right steps. It is that if each of the 5000k users we have was allowed to post their "first week" steps in this sub would be swallowed by that. Nothing against you, just doing my job as a mod. I do like your commitment and concrete steps you are taking, so I do encourage yo…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/15 11:49 AM
1

I'm going to delete this, it violates the guidelines. See https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/2uvjxz/guidelines_and_faq_updated_feb_52014/ and in more detail: https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3gkhum/mod_announcement_no_more_posts_only_saying_how_x/ Repost this in the Own Your Shit thread, it is what is for. Keep up the good work though, you show a lot of valuable self-awareness, so i'm sure you will see lasting changes soon. I'm removing this only because of the guid…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/15 11:45 AM
1

The trick is to create an atmosphere of having fun teasing and flirting, because you are so sexual, you don't get butt hurt when turned down. Eventually, in this, she will signal these things, and you will see how this is really her way of initiating, and that is fine, it works.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/15 09:03 AM
2

Here is the different perspectives: Beta Mindset: I'm angry you don't do X in bed for me. This is a childish needy mentality that is repulsive to women. Essentially you are crying for her to be a mom figure to fulfill your needs. Alpha Mindset: I'm a sexual being, and I love having fun in bed. I'll escalate, keep you on your toes, and explore crazy shit in bed. It is ok if something doesn't quite work the first time, we laugh it off, take it easy, and do other stuff. No need to talk too much abo…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/15 09:01 AM
1

It is very normal to feel resentment for her not respecting and wanting you. We all do. This is the "anger" stage of the pill. I insist you take that anger and use it as fuel for self improvement. With time, you will internalize it isn't her fault, AWALT. It was your fault you didn't respect yourself enough to put a stuff to the bad behavior, and that is why she doesn't respect you either. It is because you didn't like yourself enough to stay alpha all the time why she doesn't like you either. O…
/r/askMRP14/10/15 01:12 PM
1

The manly hobbies you mention are all good, but you have to budget regular time to have a circle of alpha friends outside the house. Camping is great for that. But also just have many alpha friends you can spend time with for minor dread. it will help you a lot with your confidence. All those daily posts you do because you feel insecure? She knows you are insecure, that is why she isn't attracted to you. Posting here only feeds your hamster, it doesn't address the underlying issue. To feel secur…
/r/askMRP14/10/15 12:58 PM
2

Why offer someone a cookie while they are puking?
/r/askMRP13/10/15 09:03 PM
1

One was deleted by the mods, so it isn't showing up.
/r/askMRP13/10/15 09:01 PM
2

Great stuff. Keep it up.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/15 02:03 PM
3

I meant "throwaway####". For me, throwaway means a temporary account you discard quickly, after a few uses. It is not just any anonymous account. It is fine to be anonymous and not dox yourself, but just having "throwaway####" screams that the person isn't going to to the hard work and is looking for a quick fix. Another tell-tale sign is they think if we just tell them how to respond to their wive's txt message, all will be well. They don't accept there are structural problems in their marriage…
/r/askMRP13/10/15 12:59 PM
1

The book is organized such that first, there are a few chapters on how to stop giving a shit about what others think of you. These are crucial to stop seeking validation from women. Then, after, it introduces some concrete techniques. Many of them are closely related to ways to pass shit tests. For exampling, fogging can be used in a continuum with agree & amplify. After that, the book is examples in different types of relationships (like customer service, boss-employee, husband-wife). Those can…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/15 10:59 AM
3

Not everyone that has a throwaway does this, but I've notice a lot of people that use the throwaway because they are afraid of their wives, and don't know what to say, and want a quick fix. There is no quick fix. Thinking that if they just texted the right thing their marriages would improve is part of the weak mentality that makes these men beta because they refuse the hard work that being an alpha is.
/r/askMRP13/10/15 10:34 AM
1

I had been looking for a chart like that, thanks for it.
/r/askMRP13/10/15 10:19 AM
1

How do you dread your lady? This tells you haven't read the basic books carefully and don't understnad dread. Reread MMSLP, it is full of tons of examples in the MAP chapters.
/r/askMRP13/10/15 10:17 AM
6

She filed divorce. She cheated on you. You can't stop any of that now no matter what you do. All that happened. You can't save your marriage. All you can do is improve yourself and your life. Sometimes that is all it takes to improve a marriage, sometimes you can't save it. This is what I've read between lines. You validated me. After some more posts like this I won't need you any longer, I'll be able to understand woman stuff myself. THANKS. Every single one of your posts is about your insecuri…
/r/askMRP13/10/15 09:59 AM
0

Day bang is great. It will help you demonstrate your SMV.
/r/askMRP13/10/15 09:37 AM
1

You are operating from her frame, reacting to what she says, then worrying about how she interprets it. That is the problem. She essentially did "Amused Mastery" to you, and you fell for it. Once you establish your frame as dominant, she will line up. The problem is not jealousy, but that you are operating completely from her frame, so when you request her to stop flirting with a guy, instead of she feeling the dread that you will slip away, instead, she feels strong that she can play with your …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/15 09:31 AM
12

You have posted every day since you opened this account. Each post is you seeking validation, and the top answer is just a version of STFU. You keep doing victim pukes. Have you even read the prereq books? Do you even lift? If not, you will keep fucking up every day. Stop posting every day, own your shit, start lifting, and read all the prereq books before you post again. This is what is best for your life right now. These posts of you are not helping you, instead, they are letting your hamster …
/r/askMRP13/10/15 09:26 AM
1

We discuss this all the time in the main sub. A quick search would reveal many options. https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/2plukx/apps_for_monitoring_her_period/ I found CLue to be the best for one woman, and even her moods, even if she is very irregular. For more than one woman you might want to search in TRP or in PUA forums.
/r/askTRP13/10/15 09:20 AM
11

Read the FAQ and Guidelines. Then Read the Guide for Beginners. Then read the course prereqs. Lurk and read. Lift. it will come together, even the PE issues you will tackle. But do the work for a bit before you post more regularly, it will help you understand better and internalize. The motto of this sub is "Acta non Verba". That means "Act, don't talk". Practice it, it is the key to overcome all this. i would really like to be fucked sometime, rather than being fuckee. How does that work with b…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/15 07:29 AM
3

This is the key. Forget what criteria other's use for their children. Have your own criteria, and it should come out naturally from your own vision for your life. If you are a great man, your son will like to be one as well. You don't need to philosophize about gender roles in society, you just alpha up, and your son will model after you. We can't fight societies' pussyfication of men by bitching about it. We fight it by being alpha, and passing it on to the next generation. My goal is that my s…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/15 08:32 AM
1

The book is dry. But is very well structured. If you understand the structure, you can read it out of order depending on your needs. It is designed for that, and it says so. I don't understand why so many people complain about it, as reading the important stuff for relationships doesn't take very long. Also, the scripts are dry, but if you look at them and think, you will see how a lot of those have similar structures, and they fit similar schemes that apply for shit tests. That kind of understa…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/10/15 08:04 AM
1

I was being facetious.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/10/15 09:24 PM
2

There is a post in front of TRP about alpha activities. Remember: there is no perfect answer that will male you alpha. Alpha is the value you carry because you do valuable stuff. So work hard, read more. That is part of becoming alpha.
/r/becomeaman10/10/15 01:51 PM
3

Get alpha friends. Do some combat martial arts, like boxing or BJJ, just join. It will be rough, but you will make guy friends, and will feel stronger. Good job with your weight loss. What I'm saying is that if you estimate how many calories you burn for your running vs. for a good-paced weight lifting routine, you will see that you might want to lift weight. There is a reason why everyone here says to start lifting, it really helps with confidence and stuff. Stop hamstering out of it, just do i…
/r/becomeaman09/10/15 08:31 PM
3

A man is someone that does manly things with a manly vision. Act, and your thoughts will follow. Do you have manly hobbies and alpha friends? This will help a lot with your inner image. Once you own yourself, you will attract others. Happiness is not something you deserve. It is something you work for. Stop being passive, the world will not give you any happiness. That is a weak mentality. You become happy by doing stuff that brings you happiness to your life. So just do them. You are 100% respo…
/r/becomeaman09/10/15 09:41 AM
0

The key is not to ignore what she says if there is some part that has value, ignore the stuff that has no value. If she is a valuable crew member, you are a good captain by filtering what is important frmo what is shit. But you are the captain and do things in your terms. If there is a problem to be solved, and you can solve it, instead of using this to bitch and fight over power, you solve it because your focus is on problems, not on arguing. If he felt like cooking, then fine, no problem, he r…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/10/15 08:04 AM
1

And then they come to ask how to pass shit tests... each single shit tests... because they haven't read those techniques in WISNIFG.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/10/15 07:58 AM
2

He has a podcast, yes.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/10/15 07:55 AM
3

You might want to also consider "Making Marriage Work For Dummies". It is an easy read. You can discuss its principles in a sub called /r/DeadBedrooms. That sub might be more to you liking.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/10/15 07:55 AM
7

Maybe we can replace the whole long tedious sidebar with a link to "Making Marriage Work For Dummies" and a link to /r/DeadBedrooms. Remember everyone: the point of the pill is you carve your own path. For this, you have to work hard, internalize, and make concepts your own. If you decide you don't like a book, wrestle with the questions of what you don't like about it, and learn from those questions. Don't quit reading out of being a lazy fuck. Being a lazy fuck is what made you an omega.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/10/15 07:53 AM
2

Use email/sms only for logistics. If she uses it for other stuff, ignore it. This will send the aura you are too busy to read emails, so she is just wasting her time.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/10/15 02:43 PM
3

An alternative to think of new ideas: think of alpha men in your area, and their hobbies. If some of these interest you, join it. Haivng a good circle of male friends helps a lot with your frame.
/r/askMRP07/10/15 02:01 PM
3

Plan how you can shave of 110 in a month. For example, if the Y has gym facilities, would it make sense to go there instead to another gym to lift? Things like that. The details don't matter, what matters is you will solve this problem to get what you want. The sacrifices will make you commit to this. Report in "Own Your Shit" as you progress.
/r/askMRP07/10/15 01:59 PM
3

Shop around for BJJ. It isn't THAT much a month. Make a budget. Figure out how save money for it, even if it means working more hours or cutting off on other crap (like drinking or shit like that). Go do it. Men solve problems. If you want to do BJJ, solve it and do it. That kind of determination is what leads to the leadership women like. It is better to pursue this dream, than to ask random internet strangers what are their hobbies. Remember, in the end, your goal is not to play reddit puppet …
/r/askMRP07/10/15 01:46 PM
1

THere is a difference between whining and just being honest you are human. Whining is what little kids do when they scratch a knee, hoping mommy comes and gives them a kiss in the knee. Treat your body like any other piece of technology in your life. You maintain it. Sometimes stuff fails, and you do the best you can. If a car gets a flat, driving as it didn't is stupid. You stop, put the spare tire, and drive carefully and get a real tire soon. YOu don't have to justify why you aren't driving a…
/r/TheRedPill07/10/15 01:03 PM
3

There is a difference between being honest about what you want and how you will get it, and bitching like a little kid that wants mommy to fix things. One is alpha, the other is omega. At the beginning, is all too tempting to just victim puke over her. Don't. STFU. Read more. Act, don't talk. THe best way to communicate this stuff is by acting in a congruent manly way, not by acting like a women talking about her feelings to get pity.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/10/15 12:56 PM
3

It's not about the nail.
/r/askMRP07/10/15 12:51 PM
2

It is essentially to open your eyes. It is not about motivation, it is all about discipline. great book. I heard about it first recommended by Bas Rutten, MMA legend.
/r/becomeaman07/10/15 12:47 PM
2

Read "The War of Art" (yes, like that, not to be confused with The Art of War"). It is about this precisely.
/r/becomeaman07/10/15 07:45 AM
1

This is a very profound insight, and a crucial step to improve your life. You show strength of character for owning your shit. Keep going. Remember, women can be your mom, or your lover. Never both. You choose what you want by behaving in the corresponding way.
/r/askMRP06/10/15 07:56 AM
4

Second, when women say they are bored, what they really mean is they want to feel your alpha (read MMSLP). Dread and doing fun shit for yourself is always the best option. Some friendly banter and sex initiation once you have the frame for that is even better. Having her give you a blowjob both makes her shut up and keeps her busy.
/r/askMRP01/10/15 10:41 AM
2

if my wife paid me proper attention, I would not have been texting other women at all. Covert contract! Read NMMNG. Stop blaming her for your choices. OWN your choices. You do stuff because you want to, period. She ignores you because she wants you, period. Stop being butt hurt to blame her for your choice. while you keep that mindset, she will see you as beta, and will ignore you more.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/15 09:03 AM
2

We suggest that in the guidelines. It is hard to enforce, but we expect people to read the basic books, and at the beginning, ask about concepts (instead of about the specifics of their special unicorn).
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/15 09:00 AM
1

The thing is that is really the best explanation. Once she understands there, her ovaries will tell her to make you happy and have great sex with you. Ovaries love those Alpha genes.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/09/15 08:48 PM
1

You are thinking you need her permission to be king. She isn't the pope to make kings. Her opinion is irrelevant. Her acceptance of the throne is immaterial. Only when you internalize this, you will start to pass shit tests. And only when she pass shit tests regularly, she will accept your kingship.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/09/15 10:59 AM
1

AWALT. Accept that, and reread the sidebar. I wrote a post for you: How to lead a wife that doesn't let you.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/15 10:16 AM
2

What if my choice is the wrong one?? I want to reply here in case others have this question too. Men aren't perfect. Leader's don't know the right decision all the time. Men plan for not being perfect, and prepare for stuff going wrong. Leader's assume full responsibility for their choices, even when they are bad. Other's will love, respect and follow you not because you always make the perfect choice, but because you own your shit.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/15 10:13 AM
1

Great stuff.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/15 10:10 AM
15

If you book the trip hoping she gives you sex, you are doing it out of that covert contract. The reason why you are sulking is NOT because of her actions, but because of the covert contract. Do I go ahead and just know sex will be on the menu in 5 months time Assume there will be ZERO sex. Now, picture that, and see if you would have fun anyway. For example, if this is a cruise ship, sometimes just going by yourself to the bar area and just chat with others is a great opportunity to display your…
/r/askMRP27/09/15 10:09 AM
10

So, who made me the king is usually the dilemna? You did. You don't need her permission to be king. You are the king. If she follows your lead, good for her. If not, you move on anyway. If is only when she feels that strength of character she will understand in her ovaries that you are going places, and only then, she will trust you enough to follow. Hoping she trusts before she follows is why she doesn't trust you in the first place. The key is: you do fun stuff in life, including watching movi…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/15 10:01 AM
1

Stop focusing on HER changes. That is a form of giving her power, giving her lead, and being reactionary. YOU live your life. YOU change. People will follow, or fall out, but that is their choice, not yours. Shit tests will increase for sure. But who cares? They are a feature, and you have to deal with them. So work on your frame, and you will face them. You have posted quite a few times here, and a lot of it seems like validations seeking or fear of change. This fear is normal: you are captaini…
/r/askMRP24/09/15 11:52 AM
12

This is MRP. When we end a relationship we do it from alpha strength, not from beta weakness. Don't take any drastic decisions. Read the sidebar. Start with NMMNG.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/09/15 10:27 AM
1

You are new here and are already thinking about limiting yourself because you are afraid of the strength women can show? This is super beta logic: If I don't rock the boat, she will be happy and won't bother me. If I improve myself, she will control me. No. You improve. You lead. She does as she wants, and if she doesn't follow, you keep going.
/r/askMRP24/09/15 10:25 AM
2

Yes, read the guidelines before posting, we enforce them.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/15 05:14 PM
2

You still talk to her, and enjoy life together. You just make sure that all the sexual strategy stuff is not discussed verbally, but through behaviors because that is the real communication that works sexually. Take it easy, read the sidebar stuff, and don't discuss any of it. They will understand your changes through your behavior.
/r/askMRP22/09/15 01:29 PM
2

If you keep posting without insight, looking for a quick fix without displaying any effort or internalization... If you keep posting without having read the basics... I will give you a temporary ban because the best way to help you is to make you do this hard work so you understand this stuff for yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/15 12:11 PM
1

You can't explaint it away. That is engaging the hamster. This is very basic stuff. Please, read the guidelines.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/15 12:09 PM
1

Stop trying to change how she thinks. You can't do that. Change how you act. Read the sidebar, and shut up. Until you do that, you will just fuck up more. You sound suspiciously like a troll...
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/15 12:05 PM
2

Ignore. Use txt for logistics only from now on. Don't negotiate over TXT, and don't JADE (justify, argue, defend, explain) anything over TXT. Then talk in person how you will get 2 adjoining rooms and say you will make it work so all are happy. Let her be angry, that is what she wants. Then, you can leave the door open while they fall asleep if needed, then close it, and go caveman, then open it again if needed. You don't need to get her permission for this. Or do whatever sensible thing works t…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/09/15 07:34 AM
2

You think that by talking you can change them so you are happy. that is blue pill mentality. YOU change. You don't like their covert contracts? well, YOU change to reject them, period, and when they try them, let them be butthurt. Don't talk. ACT. CHANGE. Don't talk, it is a mistake.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/09/15 09:29 AM
7

That she will decide when she is ready to move on to sex positions, and that I need to consider how she feels more often. Note how she is telling you (as if she is the one in charge) that she will control things. I think the big question is: what is your SMV? whatever it is, you need to improve it. Think about it this way: if Brad Pitt wanted to have sex with her, she wouldn't tell him that, she would just do whatever she wants him to do. This is because women submit in a fundamental instinctual…
/r/askMRP21/09/15 09:26 AM
7

Equitable means you have not unplugged yet and buy into societies' lies. You are the captain. You work harder than anyone else. Everything is your responsibility. From that, you gain authority. And only from that authority you can delegate to the crew members that can take the responsibility. If they fuck up, you remove responsibility and your attention. Everything else of thinking she is your equal and you must negotiate is beta thinking. Have you read anything from the sidebar yet?
/r/MarriedRedPill27/08/15 03:18 PM
3

I could try cuddling or massaging or planning an anniversary something or whatever but she's not going to fuck me regardless, so why should I? This is a covert contract. Reread NMMNG.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/08/15 07:25 AM
1

Here is what is happening: She ask for sex (you don't initiate) like a little kid begging for something. She rejects you because she wants a man. THen you go do what a teenager does and jerk off. Keep doing it if you like your life as it is. If you want to be a man, work on your frame, outcome independence, and just LEAVE the house. meet friends for beers, or go flirt with a waitress somewhere else.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/08/15 07:21 AM
3

Dude, you came here a month ago and were doing daily posts. Now you are posting more frequently than any other user, including more than the users that are legends in the manosphere. In every single post the right answer everyone tells you is to stop talking and act more, focus less on changing her, and more on changing yourself. Be more patient, you are going too fast, and ruining your marriage. You keep ignoring this advice, then fuck up, and come back here asking the same question again, and …
/r/MarriedRedPill27/08/15 07:18 AM
1

if he was never RP and cant find it in himself to continue. I was never RP and this tone was what I needed to wake up and open my eyes. If i had "nice guys" here, I would still having BP thought patters. In fact, thinking we need nice people to succeed IS part of the BP mentality. Now he reads and decides its not for him. I don't think everyone should be RP. Part of the RP mentality is that freedom of choice. Only if people want to put the hard work can they turn RP. If they are too scared to do…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/08/15 03:16 PM
10

This is a shit test. She is just trying to see if you fight her "vision". If you do, by default, you are operating in her frame. Amused Mastery: Pat her in the head and say "Oh yes, drinking Cosmos like in Sex & the City." and go back to what you were doing. By the way, Sex & the City is a woman fantasy just like Bond movies are a male fantasy. So if you want to agree and amplify, start going off on your new Bond life you will live: the cars, the women, the travel, etc.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/08/15 07:46 AM
2

Yes. He should own this shit instead. It is ok to be the old guy that takes his weights seriously and nobody fucks with. I'm practicing MMA, a lot of the people in the class are about half my age. They can take a lot more punishment than me, are stronger, taller and have more energy than me. If I was intimidated by that, I wouldn't have stuck to it. Instead, I keep my mouth shut, practice, learn, stay calm, and just think. I'm more mature than them, so I just don't let my emotions take over, and…
/r/askMRP26/08/15 07:13 AM
3

If you want to improve your SMV fast, lifting big pieces of iron is the quickest, safest and best way to improve muscle mass. Nothing gets even close. However, I'm somewhat partial to BWF because it helps with mobility and propioception (body control). But this comes at a HUGE drawback of muscle size and how quickly you gain it. Propioception helps me a lot with martial arts, many sports, and even sex positions. However, it is much harder to get huge with BWF, and there are certain muscles you c…
/r/askMRP26/08/15 07:04 AM
2

Once you accept women for whom they really are, you can turn their behavior around and see it as features. What before seemed like weapons against you, like shit tests, are turned into tools for you.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/08/15 02:54 PM
6

I am not great at the subtle differences between my wife's shit tests and comfort tests. They operate in a continuum. With frame, you pass them same way. Anyway - as for comfort tests, I know nothing about how to respond to those so I just kept my mouth shut and would occasionally grab her while she was talking and pull her close. Other times I grab DAT ASS (it's lovely) or give her a random kiss. This is the best explanation of how to pass comfort tests I've ever read. You are at an advanced le…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/08/15 02:52 PM
2

A fundamental red pill truth is attraction cannot be negotiated. She says I work out too much and I shouldn't. Standard shit test. Stop focusing on her and read NMMNG and the MMSLP.
/r/askMRP21/08/15 08:17 AM
3

Did you do the activities in NMMNG? The reason why I'm asking is that you have implemented a lot of changes in a month. Considering it takes way longer to change your SMV, it is as if you are putting more focus on changing her first, than changing yourself. Many recommend at least one month per year of marriage before you start to see changes stick. Also, the fact that you post so regularly suggests you are going too fast for the frame and knowledge you have. Here is what I think is REALLY happe…
/r/askMRP21/08/15 05:25 AM
8

Every paragraph and almost every sentence starts with "She says". The problem is you are looking at everything from her frame. You even say she is going to make you see a shrink, as if she was your mother with power to do it. Something we see here often is that people try to make too many changes too quickly, without enough frame to carry them through. You keep posting here asking for advice, that suggests you are playing reddit puppet, instead of working on your self improvement. I think that i…
/r/askMRP20/08/15 08:35 PM
2

If you go out on a date from her frame it is suplicating amd she wont get tingles. If you do it from alpha even going to the corner store is exciting. The key is Alpha frame, not what constitutes a date.
/r/askMRP20/08/15 04:41 PM
1

I agree. I was afraid this sub will turn into the hamster corral reinforcing beta ideas. It seems it is happening already...
/r/askMRP20/08/15 02:46 PM
1

This is operating from her frame, trying to guess what a date means for women, and doing that is NOT what they really want. What she really wants is to feel excitement. This is how women say "You are too beta, alpha up, make me tingle". It is not about the date. Once you realize that, only then, going out for dinner be alpha, if you do it from your frame. Otherwise it is supplicating Mr. Nice Guy stuff.
/r/askMRP20/08/15 02:45 PM
2

The problem is you think you have to do what she says she wants. Think about what she is really saying. She is not saying she wants you to be like a teen that takes her on a date (although it sounds like it). She says she wants to FEEL like a teenage girl feels on date, excited, hormones running, etc. And for that, you need to increase your alpha, so she feels the tingles.
/r/askMRP20/08/15 02:40 PM
2

What she is saying is you are boring, and she wants excitement. Excitement does not mean working from her frame, trying to "guess" what her hamster means by date. If you do that, she will just change her mind anyway. You can't fulfill that. Instead, alpha up, become more exciting. From that, you will do fun stuff because you want, and she will be excited to be part of it. Read MMSLP, it explains this idea of becoming more exciting.
/r/askMRP20/08/15 02:35 PM
1

This is terrible advice. Either you are troll, or a woman, or omega. If you are a troll or a woman, please, read the guidelines. We will enforce them. If you are very omega, I remind you that here users cannot give advice if they haven't read the basic books from the beginners guide. I suggest you lurk around some more, read MMSLP and NMMNG, and you will see how this is pure nice guy beta blue mentality. I'm not deleting the advice only for others to see an example of what NOT to do. Edit: The u…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/08/15 02:28 PM
2

The problem is very basic misunderstanding of women. It has nothing with trying to guess what a date means to her. Read MMSLP and it will blow your mind and it will make sense.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/08/15 02:24 PM
1

This. What women really mean is they want excitement. They say they want a date like those in the movies, but what they really want is more alpha. The problem is she is bored with him.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/08/15 02:23 PM
1

Thinking the problem is trying to figure out the definition of her hamster about what is a "date" is operating from her frame. What she really is saying is shit testing you because she wants excitement. Excitement. You are boring, she is saying. Read MMSLP, it is full of advice for this.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/08/15 02:21 PM
2

Read "A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy". It is full of techniques for this. If you read my history, you will see I used to suffer from panic attacks, and Stoicism help me build a really strong frame. vent to let off stream or just talk through things to get through stressful events. I am like that too. Either email them, or make more friends, or both. I joined a combat martial arts class, it is awesome. Instant great friends, fighting is better than venting, and it makes yo…
/r/askMRP20/08/15 02:18 PM
1

Read the book "The War of Art" (yes, that way, not the Art of War). It is a solid book about stopping the bullshit that leads to procrastination and just getting shit done.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/08/15 01:17 PM
1

This is a very low value post, I'm going to delete it. You do read the book, and want to post a review, with focus on how it relates to Married Man Sexual Strategy, you are welcome to.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/08/15 01:16 PM
1

If you have been half-drunk for a long time, it can be very confusing for her because she can't tell anymore if you are sober or not when you want to captain. Because of this, you have to be very patient. Check the post on how to lead, and work from that basis. You can't impose leadership, but when you lead, people can't ignore your leadership.
/r/askMRP18/08/15 12:19 PM
1

I love the icon for the sub.
/r/askMRP18/08/15 08:26 AM
1

Let me clarify. You are the captain. You have ALWAYS been the captain. You have just never done your job. We call this "the drunk captain". Because you haven't done your job, reluctantly, she is doing it for you. She hates that. I bet this is part of her anxiety, she much rather have you as a captain she can trust doing your job. Since you have been the drunk captain, there is no easy way for her to trust you again. However, you don't have to beg her to let you captain, that only makes her trust…
/r/askMRP18/08/15 07:15 AM
1

You studied Dread and developed it more than anyone else. You should dedicate more time to it. Also, I think discussing covert contracts, not just from the NMMNG point of view, but from the sexual strategy point of view (how unsexy they are) would be good. Your focus has been somewhat similar to MMSLP (although I think you are way more detailed than Athol Kay), so I would welcome stuff from other books, like Superior Man, SGM, etc. Also, I think the book WISNIFG hasn't been discussed with the se…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 08:08 PM
1

I think it is an necessary part of any transition, especially one as all encompassing as TRP. It is against the transition, actually. Transitioning is to stop seeking validation. I think that when we are beta, we seek validation, and treat our wives as if they were our mom's, and expect them to validate us like our moms. Then, users come expecting MRP to be their mom. This is playing "reddit puppet", and it prevents users from leading. The right path is NOT following our advice. The right path i…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 07:38 PM
1

If you go to the search field in MRP and type "Shit Comfort" this comes up: https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/search?q=shit+comfort&restrict_sr=on&sort=relevance&t=all Even better, BPP has a podcast. Listen to it in the car. One episode has a lot of good stuff on this topic: https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3ec07c/the_9th_mrp_basic_course_video_displays_of_value/
/r/askMRP17/08/15 05:53 PM
1

If things are bland, it is your own fault. When you pass shit tests for real, you both can even laugh at times about it. I'm just trying to hang in there and be the man be needs support from. THis is wrong. This is a form of Oneitis. No. You are the leader, the captain. You go places, and she will follow because she knows you are doing exciting stuff and she wants to contribute. You are not her therapist or her puke bucket. You are a man, a captain. I thinks she just being selfish. It is called …
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 05:50 PM
1

I like the new wording. Add something to address those 911 posts "help, my marriage is falling apart, and i need you to fix it for me before tomorrow morning". The usual advice is "google Marriage 180" or something like that, maybe this is a place to post that, with a warning that this is a bandaid and you need to lift and read the sidebar, or you are choosing to ruin your marriage frmo your own layzness.
/r/askMRP17/08/15 05:46 PM
1

Reread MMSLP, it explains comfort tests. Also a quick reddit search will lead you to BPP's posts on it. The rule of thumb is it takes at least one intense month of change for every year of marriage before you see changes. If you fall off the horse, and slide back, it takes WAY longer because she trusts your leadership even less. Fun and excitement is NOT just doing stuff to please her. It is really changing things, leading without looking for validation. Something it is simple as "wear this dres…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 05:37 PM
1

This is a low effort post. Read the guidelines, and rewrite with more details, specific questions, etc. I'm going to delete it, know that you need to put more concrete details if you want concrete answers. Have you read Rollo's Book? Are you bringing fun and excitement to your marriage? Do you have fun when you pass the tests? Which level of dread are you in? Also, althought you don't give any details, i'm willing to bet you aren't passing shit tests as well as you think, and you aren't passing …
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 02:34 PM
1

What I mean is that she needs to do it to get me off. Reword that with more Outcome Independence. Say "I like when women do this". Less focus on her and what she needs to do, more openness about what you like and want from an abundance mentality. I know it is just words, but i find that reframing things like this helps a lot with my mentality, and women do notice.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 01:47 PM
1

Thanks for your detailed reply. This is very helpful! sometimes a user needs to just post a field report about his transition. Then be told where he is wrong and guided into the right things. I agree with this. However, the point is to discuss the specific issues. Talking about your feeeeeelings seeking validation is what women do. Men focus on solving concrete problems with actions. For example, it is one thing to say "WEek 4 of transition, advice" and the other is to say "I've been very angry …
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 01:44 PM
1

I say it is a covert contract that you think she "needs" to stop what she is doing and become confident. She doesn't need to do anything. It is ok for you to communicate concrete actions you want her to do, but she doesn't need to do anything.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 11:12 AM
1

Ask BPP in detail about how long it takes for each stage of dread. He is the expert on that, he is writing a book about it. It might be just a matter of more time on stage 8.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 11:06 AM
1

I hold frame and she is into it, but she is still acting this way. Changing others is very very very hard. It takes time. ALl you can do is reward good behavior (intermittently) and be very patient. If you want to change her, then you have to have OI so you are patient. When you are teaching her to change, then it means you won't get her to change just yet, so the outcome isn't that she suddenly changes, but instead, you keep pairing the reinforcement with the behavior.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 10:16 AM
1

She's holding back and that's what she needs to stop. Covert contract. Who said it would be faking it? to fake confidence Hamster. In general, the best way to overcome inhibitions, insecurities and shyness is to fake confidence and just do it until you get used to it. That works for MEN when men have to lead. Not with woman when they have to submit. Stop thinking of her as if she was a man, she isn't. Stop saying she has to change using the same tools we tell men they should use to change. Sex i…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 10:12 AM
1

Her hamster has to tell her those things, not your words. Keep increasing dread. Which level of dread are you on right now?
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 10:11 AM
1

I like this. I'll look into implementing it here.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 10:08 AM
1

I fully agree. I wrote the guidelines about the shitty posts. I don't understand why this caused such as uproar and even forked the sub. The guidelines were always there, we just never spell them out in that much detail. I did it to help people understand them better. You would probably want to solve this problem by making the posting guidelines even more obvious so even the average Redditor with the attention span of a gnat probably won't miss it, How can I do this? I really thought I had done …
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 09:59 AM
1

Do you really think if brad pitt came right now she wouldn't act sexier? You can't negotiate desire, and your hamster is changing the order around of things trying to do it. If she gets hornier she WILL act sexier and open up. Thinking she must change to pleasure you is a convert contract. Reframe this so it becomes Outcome Independent.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 09:45 AM
1

My main worry is this will be a Hamster Corral, where all these men that refuse to unplug feel safe letting their hamsters go wild. I don't know how you guys plan to enforce it, but I would say that if a user is here for more than a few weeks, then this sub is hurting them, instead of helping them. I worry that without very strong moderation to get people to move forward, this will be a place for the hamster to grow stronger. I disagree with the wording in the sidebar saying this place is for pe…
/r/askMRP17/08/15 09:23 AM
1

My main worry about /r/askMRP is that in turns into a Hamster corral, where men too scared too transition just spin their hamster wheels. I don't know what the mods intend to do with it, but i do hope most users don't stick here for too long and instead read, lift, and go to the main sub. THAT is essential for transitioning.
/r/askMRP17/08/15 09:19 AM
1

How can you help them if they are afraid to post? Tell me how my guidelines are un unreasonable. I think the guidelines are to help with transparency for when we mod. Most users don't see the work mods do because it is insible to you when we do a good job. For example, we had a user posting really shitty questions every 18hours for days, even complaining the basic reading is too much to read. I reached out to him, and explained why this isn't good for him or the community, and deleted his posts.…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 09:17 AM
1

You can't change her. Stop focusing on changing her. Instead, focus on what YOU can do to make sex better. I also agree there is a covert contract somewhere here. Something like "Because I lead, she should be more horny" or something like that. Also, keep in mind that talking too much about this stuff is very unsexy. It puts more pressure in bed, so she can't go wild. You can't reach that side of her with logic and words, trying to only makes her less wild. You can't negotiate desire, so telling…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 08:43 AM
1

I would say if a user is in askMRP for more than a month, he has been there way too long. Also, if the posts of a user there belong more in MRP, the user also is in askMRP only out of insecurity, and should be there anymore, as it is detracting from his transition. I don't know how you plan to enforce it, but I would say that a success metric for the sub would be if you get people to come to participate in MRP following the guidelines quickly. If people are stuck in askMRP, then it means it is i…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 08:40 AM
2

I support everything you say.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 08:37 AM
1

AskMRP are much higher than some of what we've seen here on MRP. They go much more into detail about what the problem is and their proposed solutions. To me this suggest that forking the sub was terrible. Those guys should be posting in /r/MRP. They are following the guidelines. I think the reason they don't post is insecurity. But since insecurity is the beta quality that we all want to get rid of, the way to face it is to just post here, and face criticism. Staying in a safe place without crit…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 08:36 AM
1

Is there no room for a transition period for the newly unplugging? NO. Those things are still blue pill thinking. It just makes you stay blue for longer and hurt you. You are just scared of transitioning. It is normal to be scared. But the only way to do it is to face the issues. Read TRP. There is no newbie place there for a reason: if you are hamstering, the only way to snap out of it is for us to call your shit. If we are nice, we just feed your hamster more. Do you want to hamster, or do you…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 08:34 AM
1

I would like all new users to take a path similar to what you took because i believe it is the only way to change.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 08:25 AM
1

2 mods post about the shit quality of posts here. I am one of them. I posted guidelines for why posts are good and what aren't. If you disagree with one of them, we can discuss it and explain it. So far, a lot of people has bitched in general that this is unfriendly, but nobody has provided any specifics about why having guidelines hurt the sub. This is not a friendly place, and the unplugging haven't built enough frame and self confidence to handle the onslaught of shit that will befall them. T…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 08:24 AM
1

I fully agree with all your concerns, these are mine as well. We are trying to coordinate this to have the guys that run it address them.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/15 08:10 AM
1

Read "When I say no I feel guilty". It is full of techniques to handle this stuff.
/r/askMRP17/08/15 07:07 AM
1

Read my guidelines post and tell me which one you disagree with. Nobody that says they dislike them have specificay addresses them. It is all strawman attacks. In the guidelines i am clear how newbies are welcomed.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/15 06:52 AM
10

Men are disturbed not by the things that happen, but by their opinion of the things that happen. -Epictetus
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/15 06:35 AM
2

Changing her is very hard. You must change yourself first, or it work work. She will refuse to change just to show you are weak. Are you the captain? How is your SMV compared to hers? How is you frame? Withought having a leading frame, you will only get frustrated engaging her hamster trying to change her, she won't, and she will smell your weak frame.
/r/askMRP14/08/15 07:08 PM
2

Being called lazy on reddit is a great way to start off the weekend. I upvoted the post calling you lazy because it is lazy. I recently wrote a post about what consistutes a good post. Here are the guidelines. This is not a good post, this is a lazy post. It is low quality for reasons detailed there, especially 1,3,6,9. There are two possibilities of why this post is lazy, and how to address the real issue: 1) You want us to solve your problems. And your problem is trying to fix the emotions of …
/r/MarriedRedPill14/08/15 01:54 PM
2

Excellent job. Focusing on solving the real issue you identify instead of trying to fix her emotions. Her hamster will make her feel stupid for acting up so emotional for no reason. You were in charge, took responsibility, and made it work. You wanted family breakfast, you gave breakfast to the family.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/08/15 01:42 PM
2

I fully agree. I see that Fogging for example can easily turn into Agree and Amplify if needed. A charming Amused Mastery with a posture welcoming a hug can be perfect to comfort her. This all goes together. In a different thread we came up with something called an "Oak Move", which essentially shows both your strength to be unmoved but also your warmth at the same time.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/08/15 12:14 PM
1

Reading is easier than implementing. Stoicism is something to be practiced, not to be read and left there. To change your mindset you MUST take actions, and these actions have to be new actions you aren't doing already. With disciplined action you can change how you think. But just hoping your mindset changes by itself doesn't work, just like reading about weight lifting doesn't make you strong. Have you read Irvine's "A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy"? If has tons of concr…
/r/askMRP14/08/15 09:22 AM
1

This is a very well thought out post, and you have read the basic books. Why didn't you post this in /r/MRP? Since your like Stoicism, I lin for others a post about OI from a Stoic point of view. I think it will help with a lot of your points. More specifically: I know RP takes time and I figure that 4 years of being a massive beta I may a) never turn it around in her mind regardless of what a badass I am/become b) This is defeatist. You are focusing on changing her mind (you have no control ove…
/r/askMRP14/08/15 09:09 AM
1

The post in itself isnt. The fact you posted here before MRP suggests you were nervous about that others think in MRP even when you had good stuff.
/r/askMRP13/08/15 05:29 PM
3

Stop hamstering. Reread your post. Identify how many times you write things from her frame, to get validation, etc. From this exercise you will learn a lot and get rid of covert contracts. You don't need to convince me you aren't afraid of her. I know you are, your post revealed it. What you need to do is stop lying to yourself, so you face that fear. That is the way to conquer it.
/r/askMRP13/08/15 04:22 PM
2

I think askMRP just validated what i was saying: these guys just want validation, and they are scared in MRP, so they think they will get cuddly validation here, and that somehow that way they will become men.
/r/askMRP13/08/15 04:20 PM
3

I used to believe this, that i had to become the captain. This is wrong. You are the captain. You have always been the captain. You have just ignored your duties because you are drunk. Because of this, your crew lost trust on you, and your wife is reluctantly captaining. She won't trust you any time soon and let you captain. However, the only way forward is for you to sober up, do more shit, take more responsibility, and when the conflict comes, show your leadership. There are no training wheels…
/r/askMRP13/08/15 04:18 PM
1

If you can do it, I'll applaud you. However, it might be a lot of work because the line is so fuzzy, and when you draw it, people will cry and be butthurt because you said you would be nice to them.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 03:02 PM
3

Think how a polite but strong cop communicates with authority.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 02:49 PM
1

Do you have a group of male friends? do you do manly activities? I find that often that is the key to stop seeking validation.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 02:48 PM
1

Yes, but for those, the answer will probably be "read the prereqs" over and over.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 02:48 PM
5

If you like this stuff, check out the book "A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy". Then read the main reference by the original Stoics. That shit really helped me with my frame. I had the weakest frame of anyone here, and lifting, Stoicism, writing, reading really transformed me. Read my older posts, you will see how i changed. Once you have frame, all is clear, and sexual strategy is very easy. You stop focusing on the woman, and focus on yourself, because you are the price, a…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 02:23 PM
3

Frame is not the same as having no emotions. It is making sure your emotions work towards your vision. It is ok to let them see the lion, just a glimpse, controlled. Let the hamster do the rest. This is super powerful Decades ago this might have been a slap in the face, but now a days, that can get you to jail, and women exploit that. If you end up in jail, it doesnt' help your vision, so be mindful. Something important is that often we mask fear with anger. That is weak. This happens a lot when…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 02:18 PM
2

She's told me a few times recently that something "is not very nice". This is normal. Lurk around, you will see everyone faces this face of "Now you are being an asshole". It is just she is starting to see the changes, she cant' push you around, and changes are hard for her. The key is that you stop seeking validation from her. If you know you aren't an asshole, then it doesn't matter if she says you are. When women don't like what you do, they accuse and insult. BUt really, that is just a child…
/r/askMRP13/08/15 02:09 PM
6

If you want to learn more, I wrote a post explaining how to become Outcome Independent using tricks from Stoicism.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 11:45 AM
5

A way to think about the hamster is that first, the person's emotion lead them to a conclusion, and then, the person uses "logic" to justify it. Everyone does it, but women are notorious at this. Trying to use logic against this emotional logic doesn't work, because it is essentially "arguing", which only increases the emotions, and empowers the emotional logic. Changing someone by talking is almost impossible because words can't beat emotions. This is why I always say "Hamsters eat logic and sh…
/r/askMRP13/08/15 11:40 AM
3

Is IO Outcome Independence? Why not share this FR about important concepts in the main sub to generate discussion? I thought askMRP was for asking advice.
/r/askMRP13/08/15 11:09 AM
2

A lot of my earlier posts that were upvoted a lot was essentially my way of taking concepts I read elsewhere and making them my own. For each of those posts, I could list pages of weaknesses and mistakes I made. The posts were my way to consolidate the ideas, and by sharing them, others could benefit. Read them. You will see often I admit to my own weaknesses and not being able to do this regularly. That is fine, the point is not to be perfect, but that introspection, that way of judging ourselv…
/r/askMRP13/08/15 11:02 AM
1

You did well in not engaging her hamster about the car. It takes time to not let these things bother you. Seriously working on your SMV to be more muscular will help you feel better about the shit tests. Some of the best ways to pass shit tests is to simply ignore them. This is very hard to do if you are in your anger phase. Just keep going, try your best. Reread the "Rights" in the first few chapters of WISNIFG. Also, sometimes just admitting you are angry, and going to do something outside the…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 08:31 AM
1

If they don't know to post in the weekly thread that is stickied, what makes you think they will post in the daily thread? If the newbies won't read the FAQ and Beginner's guide on the sidebar, what makes you think they will follow guidelines? All we can do as mods is detail the guidelines, and keep nudging users with warnings. This addresses 99.9% of the users. We had one incident of one user not liking it and bitching about it because he wanted to give blue pill advice while refusing to read a…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:29 AM
1

I think nobody transitions while they are scared and want to be pampered. It is a bitter pill after all. /r/asktrp is terrible. I have never seen a user there suddenly "getting it" and going to /r/trp with deep insights. /r/asktrp is just a place where bluepillers hang out asking "is this alpha?" seeking validation. I worry the same will happen for "light" mrp. The reason users don't transition is NOT because we aren't giving them good advice. It is that they don't do the work they must. We can'…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:26 AM
1

Yes. The guidelines are just about explaining better why these things are getting hammered, so people can self reflect. We will continue modding as usual, we just wanted to be more transparent.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:24 AM
1

Read WISNIFG. It has tons to tricks for this kind of situation.
/r/askMRP13/08/15 07:18 AM
3

This is a good post discussing concepts from the books. You could post this in the main sub.
/r/askMRP13/08/15 07:17 AM
6

I'm writing a series on this subject. Start here. The books that helped me maintain frame more where first, NMMNG (getting rid of those covert contracts is awesome) and WISNIFG (it has tons of tools to not let shit bother you). Since this is such an important topic, I suggest you stop skimming and start reading those books.
/r/askMRP13/08/15 07:16 AM
2

Your post is insightful and has self reflection. You have read the beginner's stuff, and have precise questions after you wrestled with the concepts. This would be a very good post in the main sub.
/r/askMRP13/08/15 07:14 AM
2

If it plays out in your head, and you were aware of it, this is huge. I'm not perfect, I still sometimes find these thoughts in me. But what matters is that I'm aware of them and don't let them control me. Also, something I started saying when people comment on a job well done and I don't know what to say is "I really like it too." It is polite, addressing their compliment, but focusing on the fact that I did it for myself.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:11 AM
2

That is a great idea. I also practice mindfulness techniques, mostly based on Stoic and Buddhist tricks. I'm not spiritual, but that stuff really works, because it allows me to observe my own thought patterns, and by doing that, their destructive power diminishes. "I'm just bitching, that is ok, it is just bitchy thoughts, nothing more".
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:07 AM
2

Yes! Also, go hit a punching bag, it is fucking great to vent your bitching there. The whole point is you don't look for validation, you just know you need to vent, and you do it in a safe place that doesn't affect your SMV. No covert contracts.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:06 AM
2

People come here thinking if they just ask the right question, and we just gave them the answer, their problems will be fixed. The thing is that the problem is themselves, and the way to solve it is through hard work, that is what men do. But then people get angry or resentful, just because they don't want to take responsibility. This is why trying to give the pill to someone doesn't work.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:04 AM
2

Don't talk or brag. That comes off desperate and like you are searching for validation. SHOW with actions. Let her hamster remind her.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:02 AM
1

I am working on that, life got in the way. The last leg, emotional basis, is the one that has been mostly ignored by TRP, so it has required a lot more research and gathering of resources than I thought.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:01 AM
1

You must alpha up. When you do, the other men will notice, she will notice, and everyone will fall in line. If you haven't read the Beginner's Guide, where these things are explained, and you are looking for a quick fix, go somewhere else. This is place for self improvement. And the solution to your problem is self-improvement. Increase your alpha.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 07:00 AM
1

Why is this needed? There is no TRP for beginners. How do you plan from transitioning people stuck seeking validation in a circle jerk to them owning their shit? There is no smooth way to do it, so how to prevent them from getting stuck in a blue pill shallow pool? I'm not being critical, I'm just asking tough questions to encourage you to kick ass with this sub.
/r/askMRP13/08/15 05:03 AM
2

It is in the mrp wiki
/r/askMRP13/08/15 05:02 AM
1

That is in the FAQ on the sidebar
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 05:01 AM
2

We have that. It is beginners guide in the sidebar, just below the FAQ. It is amazing, focused, and gives an excellent guide for the first few steps you must take when you come here. I am now highlighting it is required to read it, and users that just want a quick fix without owning their shit are protesting. I don't think the problem is the lack of structure. It is people want us to fix their marriage and be reddit puppets. That doesn't work, because the way for them to fix their marriage is to…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/15 05:01 AM
2

By the way, there is already a sub for the breaking free exercises. It is /r/nmmng
/r/askMRP12/08/15 08:46 PM
1

So it goes
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:29 PM
2

It is more than a filter. It is the best way for people to understand our advice is not going to fix their lives. Only their hard work improving themselves can improve their lives.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:27 PM
2

I would say saing "5 days since unplugging" is the attention getter. Because the person is trying to get credit without doing anything except waiting. More useful would be for them to list the books on the sidebar they have completed, and then ask about stuff they don't understand.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:23 PM
1

For a few months. The talk is high level dread. BPP suggests one month per level of dread.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:21 PM
1

You are hamstering. Stop. Shut up. Read NMMNG right now.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:20 PM
3

The problem is YOU. You are blaming her, saying she changed, she became dominant, because of her work. Bullshit. You became weak, you didn't lead, so she had to reluctantly step in. This is know as "The drunken captain". You fuck up, get drunk, so she has to fill in your shoes. It will take time before she trusts you. But you have to sober up and do the work. Stop blaming her for captaining. The problem isn't her, is that you didn't lead.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:20 PM
2

Counseling is totally beta and it doesn't work. I don't know your story, but I bet that you went to counseling thinking if you got professional help, she would finally understand what you tell her, and she would change. That is beta. I don't care what problems you have. But I do know the solution is you change. Until you do that, you are just ignoring that you are the captain of your life. Stop trying to have others fix your marriage. YOU change. Do the hard work and do it right now. Have you lo…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:18 PM
2

Know that whatever the problem in your marriage is, the solution is you man up and change. And from your post, I can tell this will take time, and if you try to rush it, it will come out as a teenage angsty rant. Shut up, read the sidebar, put your head down, grow up, man up.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 07:15 PM
1

I know. But i used map as a pun for MMSLP and its Man Action Plan.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 06:47 PM
2

Also considering one of the important concepts from MMSLP is called MAP...
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 05:30 PM
3

The only indispensable person is the captain. If the navigator dies of scurvy the captain still has to get the ship to safety. The only person without excuses is the captain. Heck, if you are starting, you captain a small vessel without navigator. Dont blane the lack of navigator for you not doing your job. And if you think internet strangers in a forum are your navigators, you are still the drunk captain. All we can do is tell you where the map is. And the map is the sidebar. You must read it. …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 05:13 PM
1

Just don't do it to impress your wife. Do it to become a salsa dancer that can dance with all sorts of women. Your mindset will be the correct then even if you end up dancing mostly with your wife.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 02:44 PM
1

Yup. In fact, the more details you give about what isn't working, the better. Because in the end, you need to get used to diagnose the problems yourself. If you let your hamster spin the story, you never see your mistakes. So work hard to identify them. At the beginning you won't get them right, and that is fine, the forum is for you to discuss to flesh that out and learn. A good reply for a question posts never feels like "Oh, this guy has flair he says he is approved, I'll do what he says", bu…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 02:33 PM
1

The goal of the sub is about your self-improvement, as motivated by sexual strategy to improve your marriage.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 02:26 PM
1

Put all your frustrations into improving your SMV so you surpass her.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 02:19 PM
1

Something I do is I write it down and whine a lot. Then I say "Here it is, me bitching. I'm done bitching, bitching more won't help me improve." and then don't read it again. Alternatively, I talk to some good male friend, and tell him directly "I'm going to bitch for a while, I'm just venting." and I do it. And then say "I'm done bitching." This sets the tone that i don't need validation or pity, i know what i need, and i'm done now.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 02:18 PM
1

It helps if you are trying to increase the sex frequency because it is better to increase it first when she is horny, and this sets the tone for the other weeks. However, if sex frequency is good, then it might not be worth the trouble.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 02:15 PM
1

Ha. To be fair, they give you similar results, and I saw it recommended in threads were men found out she cheated on them.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 01:38 PM
3

This post smells like a Blue Pill Victim Puke about to happen. Those victim puke feel good at the beginning, and then you will realize how bad you made things by doing it. Don't do it. Read NMMNG first.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 01:37 PM
1

Then just take the classes. No need to do it secretly to impress her. Enjoy the dread that comes from it, and then, have fun taking her dancing.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 01:33 PM
3

Then just take classes yourself, and take out her out dancing, and lead, and have fun. Don't do it to "impress her". That is seeking validation. Just do it because you want to do it for yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 01:18 PM
2

Learn salsa because you want to have fun. Not to impress her. Doing things to impress her is beta thinking, seeking validation, unattractive. Take classes alone if you want to learn. Heck, you can use it for dread. Or take classes with her because you see it as fun thing to do as a couple. But secretly doing it to "impress" her is the worse reason. Because then when she shit tests you about it and blames you for not knowing how to dance, you will get butt hurt.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 01:13 PM
2

The thing is I believe that the way to transition and add value to the community is the same: Read, try, discuss. If you aren't reading and trying, you won't transition, and the discussion is just your spinning your hamster wheel.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 12:32 PM
1

Keep up contributing with excellent posts. 'men' on here absolutely need someone to hold their hand. What they don't understand is that if anyone holds their hand, they don't transition. Users are crying "But if you don't hold my hand, it means you don't care about me, and I'll never feel confident." and what we are saying "We can't hold your hand because we believe you can do it and when you do, you will feel confident.".
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 12:27 PM
1

They told me to read the sidebar, but when your life is in such a mess, reading through hundreds of pages of conceptual material is the last thing you want to do. But the thing is that although you didn't want to do it, that was exactly what you had to right? The right thing is to lift, read the sidebar books, etc. You were looking for others to fix your problems, even suicidal intents, and we can't do that. Only you can do the work to fix them. The guidelines are precisely for that. Pretending …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 12:21 PM
2

Beta men seek support in their wives. See NMMNG, the book is essentially about that. If we replace their wives for MRP to give this support, we do them a disservice. We must all be strong so we get support from our Frame, not from others.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 11:42 AM
1

cutting everyone off because you don't feel like they are up to your level What makes you think this is the goal of the guidelines? You said this in many places, and when I wrote them, I tried my best to be very clear because I don't want that either. I've read them and reread them, and I don't understand why you conclude that. Can you tell me concretely? If so, I will be happy to edit and clarify that. start working on growing that community. I am apprehensive because /r/asktrp has the full sup…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 11:37 AM
2

This is precisely why I don't think MRP is a support group. Support groups are for victims. Also, without self-reflection of the users, we can't really advice them, as their hamster filters they story to stay blue pill, and then they just become addicted to advice, instead of owning their shit and becoming men. Why do we want to create reddit puppets?
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 11:35 AM
1

Rant without connection to sexual strategy in marriage, title that doesn't describe anything nor helps to search things. I'm going to delete it. It is just a pedantic search for validation unrelated to sexual strategy in marriage. If you rewrite it emphasizing the connection to that, you can repost.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 09:32 AM
3

That only serves to encourate blue pill thinking by rewarding their need for validation. That isn't MRP.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 09:30 AM
1

I am noob as fuck We have flair for this. Go to the main MRP page, find your name in the sidebar, click "edit", and add the flair "Unplugging". This is detailed in the FAQ and Guidelines in the sidebar. As always, if you read the sidebar, the answer is there ;)
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 09:29 AM
2

I also see the need for people to make mistakes and fumble their way through shit. Each of the bulletpoints in the guidelines are precisely for promoting that. Please, reread them, I emphasize how acting and failing is essential for quality posts. So a lot of what you propose is really just the guidelines. We already have "whitebelt" flair and such. Also, we have Own Your Shit. OWS is the equivalent to after sparring, discussing with others your mistakes so you learn more. If you all want to use…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 09:26 AM
1

Absolutely every person that has opposed the guidelines has only given blue pill reasons for why they don't like them. MRP is not /r/relationships. None has actually said why they think each of my bullet points do not improve the community and benefit everyone. If you want a safe environment for that kind of thing, go to /r/deadbedrooms.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 09:09 AM
1

for men to be able to decide their own paths and then look for refinement. I don't want men who have to turn towards me or MRP before they make a decision. This. I would add even more: if men turn to MRP before they make every decision, MRP is not helping them, it is hurting their marriage. Users think the guidelines here are against newbies, but they really are FOR newbies. It is just newbies think that what they need is a safe warm fuzzy place to cry and be cuddled, or that they need a Fairy G…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 09:07 AM
1

MRP is not about advice. TRP is not about advice. /r/relationships is about advice. /r/deadbedroom is about advice. The thing is what MRP teaches is that the best sexual strategy is for each man to be a strong alpha with a vision. You can't teach that by telling men what their vision has to be, nor what they should do. Each man can only learn that from trying different things, failing, stop being afraid of failing, and from this, become stronger. MRP and TRP are NOT about advice. This is very di…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 09:04 AM
2

Google affair 180. However if you want to change your marriage by talking to her you will fail.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 05:12 AM
1

Precisely. Those are crappy posts. The guidelines here cover them. I hope we see less of those. It seems you do agree with the guidelines after all!
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 07:39 PM
1

I'm hoping with these guidelines our users will self-filter and all those low qual posts will decrease. We will still of course nudge users, give warnings, and in extreme cases, use mod tools to enforce the warnings. But for 99% of users, guidelines and nudges is all that is needed.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 07:38 PM
1

they need to write about what they're going through in order to process it. This is true. This is why I recommend they do like Emperor Marcus Aurelius, a Stoic practinioner: keep a personal diary. Write it down. Process. Read. Evaluate. This is very powerful for personal insight. But don't make MRP that! If you are using MRP for that, you just want an audience because you are seeking validation, and just staying beta. That doesn't help anyone, nor the person that posts, nor the other users. If s…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 07:36 PM
1

Everyone comes here thinking their situation is unique and they are special. But the principles are the same. This sub is NOT for advice. It is for you to grow as a married man. It is your job to grow. It is your job to solve your situation. That is what men do. We can help you discuss sexual strategy in marriage. But if you havent done the prereq reading, you will talk /r/deadbedroom puke.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 06:32 PM
1

We dont want to reach all men. In fact, we dont think all men can do this. We just want here the men that are willing to work hard. The rest we dont care about. There are alphas and betas in life. I respect the choice of everyone. But this sub is for those who want to alpha up while married. Reread the guidelines. They are all fine for new people. However, I do believe new people can do quality posts. I was made a mod while I was still new and unplugging because I was able to contribute from wha…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 05:54 PM
1

The thing is that is not only good for the sub but also for you. Seriously. It makes your transition go through with less problems.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 05:52 PM
1

Thanks for mentioning this. I forgot to mention this!
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 01:54 PM
2

To be honest, I don't see it as "change". But since we never spell it out, as a mod, I do take responsibility for not doing my job to help the community focus itself more.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 01:44 PM
5

If you are working your way through the material and a situation comes up where you are not sure what to do. As the guidelines say, this type of posts do add to the community: "Post an insightful question regarding a concept you are struggling with. When in doubt, shut up, read more. It is ok to post if you are reading but don't understand some concepts, but the questions have to be specific." So, it sounds like you do agree with the guidelines! It was really pretty perplexing to me an I still h…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 01:37 PM
2

We want to to discourage men solipsism here. Those post always have very few votes and are low in quality. Like I said, we welcome questions. But if those people want to improve, really improve, instead of using internet strangers as their standard of manhood, they do better to read, do the work, and discuss, instead of asking to be spoonfed solutions. The problem with play-by-play answers is that it prevents people from transitioning. Instead of becoming Men, they become Reddit Puppets. Finally…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 12:50 PM
1

My reply: I believe that everyone, including newbies, can post insightful stuff if they kill their hamster, take a very hard look at themselves, swallow their ego, read the books on the sidebar and do the hard work of putting things in practice. Posting because you don't understand and want to learn is fine. But posting because you are lazy haven't done the background work or you are scared of implementing things are not fine. When in doubt, post in the Own Your Shit weekly threads to make yours…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 12:47 PM
2

It is difficult to get the right balance between quality posts and activity in a sub. I'm hoping that by writing guidelines, the whole community will work with us towards quality. We are here to challenge each other to grow more and be better men. We don't hold back. If someone is fucking up, we tell them directly, no pat in the back. If you fuck up, we tell you. We won't sugar coat anything to "support" people. If someone is hurt when told they are the cause of their problems, well, they need t…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 12:41 PM
1

You empowered her by telling her to take it down and that it was disrespectful. This is weak. Respect can't be gained by asking for it. This makes you look weak. Amused Mastery or ignoring it would have been better than what you did.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 09:59 AM
3

The confidence of the captain doesn't come from the captain knowing everything. It comes from the captain knowing ultimately he is responsible for everything. The captain doesn't have to justify his decisions, nor explain them. He knows that even if they are bad, he has to fix the problem, and keep going. The captain owns his shit, this is why he doesn't have to explain his shit.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 09:45 AM
1

When in doubt, STFU and go for a walk. I could just take over absolute control of our finances This. Finances are your responsibility. You can delegate a lot if she is mature and responsible and earns it, but ultimately, you are the captain. The rest of the bullet points is just you engaging her hamster asking her to change. This is beta, it isn't leading, and is weak. This is just what NMMNG calls a victim puke. Stop talking. Let your actions speak for you.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 09:20 AM
1

He is regularly posting low quality posts. I have given him a warning. If he keeps posting without reading the prereqs, we will impose a temporary moratorium on him.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 09:12 AM
2

Bullshit. This is beta covert contracts. Stop this shit. Read NMMNG now.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 09:11 AM
1

If you haven't read the prerequesites, you shouldn't be posting. All this stuff is covered there. We even have a beginners guide that explains all this. A lot of the questions you ask are already answered in the wiki also. I have noticed you posting very regularly bad quality posts. Sometimes twice a day. Stop posting low quality posts. See here. It is now clear you haven't done the bare minimum. Put yourself on a self-imposed posting moratorium until you complete the Prereqs. Meanwhile, post on…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 09:08 AM
2

It is a simple as saying "I have a cold, I'm going to take a nap now and close the door. Please, keep the kids from waking me up" instead of saying "I feel like shit, my throat hurts, meh meh meh... I'm sick, i hate being sick."
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 09:03 AM
1

He can't fix a problem of years in a week. Searching for an immediate solution is just a way to not do the hard work to really fix things. His case is classic, and the Prereqs in the Sidebar of MRP are exactly what he needs. There we have a beginner's guides which covers this scenario. If he doesn't have time to read NMMNG and MMSLP, then, he really doesn't want to do the bare minimum for his marriage.
/r/askTRP11/08/15 08:46 AM
1

This is a low quality post. Read these guidelines, post less, and post higher quality stuff. This is a gentle warning from a mod.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 08:11 AM
1

This is a low quality post. Read these guidelines, post less, and post higher quality stuff. This is a gentle warning from a mod.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 08:11 AM
1

This is a low quality post. Read these guidelines, post less, and post higher quality stuff. This is a gentle warning from a mod.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 08:10 AM
1

This is a low quality post. Read these guidelines, post less, and post higher quality stuff. This is a gentle warning from a mod.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 08:10 AM
1

This is a low quality post. Read these guidelines, post less, and post higher quality stuff. This is a gentle warning from a mod.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 08:09 AM
1

This is a low quality post. Read these guidelines, post less, and post higher quality stuff. This is a gentle warning from a mod.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 08:09 AM
1

This is a low quality post. Read these guidelines, post less, and post higher quality stuff. This is a gentle warning from a mod.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 08:09 AM
1

This is a low quality post. Read these guidelines, post less, and post higher quality stuff. This is a gentle warning from a mod.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 08:07 AM
4

This is a low quality post. Read these guidelines, post less, and post higher quality stuff. This is a gentle warning from a mod.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 08:06 AM
1

You are frequently insecure questions that are all addressed in the Course Prereqs. This suggests you aren't doing the hard work to become the man your wife wants to fuck, but instead, are melting away in insecurity without taking action. Each post of your reveals you haven't read the basics. If you want things to improve, post less, way less. Focus for a few weeks posting only in "Own Your Shit", lurk and read the sidebar. This is a kind warning from a mod: stop the low quality posts and lurk m…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 07:50 AM
2

Shameless plug to my post on the Physical Basis for Frame where I discuss these in more detail.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/15 01:54 PM
6

Captains don't tell their crew they are tired, stressed, or freaking out. It only makes the crew more nervous. Captains go to the captains table and share stories and drinks with other captains.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/15 01:50 PM
1

Become a man and do the work to lead. Have you even read the fundamentals of the sidebar? Until you do, nothing will make sense, and you will make more mistakes and make things worse.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/15 01:49 PM
2

I was thinking about going to her about the amount of stress I have. Either she can help me by taking some tasks, or at least tell me thanks for doing everything. Is this recommended? She can be your mother or your lover, but not both. You chose. However, depending what you chose, she will either see you as a child, or as man, never both. It isn't your lover's responsibility to make you feel good about yourself or support you. That is unattractive and beta. It sounds like you need Mommy right no…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/15 01:48 PM
2

Report back next week so you are accountable to yourself. The more concrete the diet and workout plan, the more effective it will be. You don't have to reinvent the wheel, but do something more concrete than "cut down junk food".
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/15 04:28 AM
1

What will you do this week to work on your Frame and SMV?
/r/MarriedRedPill09/08/15 04:59 PM
2

These are covert contracts and are beta. Read NMMNG and MMSLP. Stop blaming this sub for your bad beta choices. Here we think men should be horny cavemen and should initiate regularly.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/08/15 06:39 AM
3

This. Do a combat martial arts. It will help you stay cool outside and bit be afraid without feeling you must fight. But in the ring you fight hard. Also there you will make friends that are all bad asses and yor confidence will grow.
/r/becomeaman08/08/15 06:31 AM
2

Just build a strong frame that is yours truly. When you have a good frame, instead of worrying about maintining the frame, the frame keeps you strong.
/r/becomeaman08/08/15 06:28 AM
14

This is known as the "monkey dance". A good book about this subject is "Meditations on Violence" by Rory Miller. In a nutshell, men, especially young men, are all very insecure and desperate to determine social status. This status is determined by who has the stronger frame, and if two frames clash, it can lead to violence to determine who is more alpha. Example "Who are you looking at?" and then a stare down that can lead to a fight. As men age, the structures are more rigid, and men feel less …
/r/becomeaman07/08/15 11:40 AM
2

Don't ask her to change them. Things you can do: Buy her sexy clothes and command her to put them on. "Wear them tonight for me". Buy yourself silk boxers, and up your looks in bed. Just command her to take the clothes off and enjoy seeing her naked for a bit. Or even better, take her clothes off and check her out for a bit.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/08/15 08:35 AM
3

Life is not about resolve. It is about discipline. Be a man. Don't be a child that only does the hard stuff when he feels like it. Be a disciplined man, do stuff with discipline, keep going. These aren't changes you will see in a few days. 2 weeks is NOTHING. Estimate one month per year of relationship before you see changes. And then, you can never quit. If you stop improving, you will lose all the terrain you gained. These are changes you make in yourself, forever, all the time, always improvi…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/08/15 08:33 AM
2

Why are you afraid of her rants? Let her rant. And then use agree and amplify "The pizza must be even more tired because it won't walk here to your mouth". She is creating the following situation: you either comply with her request, or she punishes you with a rant. While you see it this way, you are operating from her frame, and she is in command. Break this frame, and create your own: be amused by her stupid crap, and laugh. Never ever ever get into an argument about who does more when. It is f…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/08/15 08:05 AM
2

It is a hot button issue because she got to accuse you of no manning up. The thing is that when a woman tells you to man up, NEVER do what she says. You can't man up by showing she controls you.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/15 12:53 PM
1

Think of dancing as a test- ground for your leadership. Then, lead.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/15 07:44 PM
2

Don't turn, i want you to go THIS way. Frankly, if she is doing this, it suggests you aren't leading strongly enough when dancing.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/15 01:42 PM
1

A good book to start is "A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy" by Irvine. It has a lot of great tools for being Stoic and having a strong emotional basis for your frame. There he also refers to the classics and explains them a bit, and you can read more following his suggestions.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/08/15 10:35 AM
1

I think Txt game helps, but it is a drop in the bucket. A 30 day moratorium suggests a deeper problem.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/15 07:24 PM
2

I used to think that passing shit tests was really hard, and you had to think quickly and be clever. But more often than not it is just about breathing and shutting your mouth, and not feeling judged. From that, whatever way you act, will pass the test. I was so scared of Amused Mastery. Then it came naturally because of this. Some of my favorite amused masteries don't require words, and are so subtle they don't make for a good story here, but it worked.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/15 05:26 AM
1

WISNIFG is great for many things, but it isn't TRP enough. The things suggested there are about assertiveness in general, without considering sexual strategy. The strategy that you mention is good with woman when they are hamstering but need comfort of feeling listened to. Then you do this, let them blabber away, without giving them a target to fight against. But in this case the woman was doing a strong shit test to impose her frame on you to test your alpha. It wasn't about comfort. In that ca…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/15 05:17 AM
1

Look at the wiki too.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/07/15 05:10 AM
2

maybe we can start a spin-off sub called /r/betapuke
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/15 08:45 PM
1

Also, remember, no daily or weekly progress reports. Use "Own Your Shit" threads for this purpose.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/15 03:37 PM
1

I want to point out that we also discourage weekly updates. OYS threads are for this. The key is that these period updates are a bit too self-indulgent and beta always. We should post when we have something important to say. Sometimes, this thing is when we struggle with a concept and have a very well defined question, and these questions add to the community by creating good discussions. Other times is when we have a breakthrough and get something, and want to share that to help others.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/15 03:33 PM
1

Thanks for understanding. Please, go ahead with specific focused questions (as detailed in the guidelines and FAQ) and feel free to write in the OYS threads.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/15 03:29 PM
2

Yes. The emphasis there is to not blame others, and really challenge ourselves, which is how we develop our trust to judge ourselves.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/15 03:03 PM
2

We do not allow people to do day by day updates as they unplug. It is just little self-awareness, to much seeking validation. v I'm going to delete this. Please, lurk more, post in the weekly Own Your Shit posts instead for a while. Something I recommend personally is to keep a diary. Unplugging takes a long time, they say to expect one month per year of marriage to see changes. In a month, read back at the diary, and you will see how much insecurity and hamster you had back in the day, and will…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/15 10:03 AM
2

"Command respect" This is your ship. Command respect so everyone knows that if they don't like it, they can jump overboard.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/07/15 07:54 PM
1

I'm deleting this because you didn't add anything to make it MRP. MRP is not AskTRP, and we don't like straight links to low quality posts. Next time, show you have read the sidebar and Own Your Shit, so you add value to MRP, and in the text, explain the situation without blaming the woman so much.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/07/15 07:42 PM
8

The problem is not your dominance. It is the classic problem with someone with alcoholism. Those excuses she uses are the classic ones too. Read about how to handle family members with Alcohol problems, and do that. You will see a lot of it is just having strong boundaries, and being strong. For example, since she won't get help for her problem, you can refuse to go to events where she will drink. There are more details about this, but the issue here isn't really about sexual strategy, but about…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/07/15 10:43 AM
1

It is the captain's job to ensure good communication channels to the crew. I'm not sure what kind of needs OP has (bluetooth in the car sounds like a must if he expect his wife to answer while driving!), but I want to emphasize to the OP that our specific advice (bluetooth, apps, powercords, etc) isn't as important as the concept that: OP, you are the captain and you are responsible for creating good communication channels. For example, in the old days, the engine room was always very loud, yet …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/07/15 07:39 AM
1

You are right about the concern. I want to clarify what I meant. phrase the concern as a problem to solve because the captain takes measures for the safety of the crew. Don't focus on feeeelings and how woooorried you were. That is what women do in response to dread. Say you are worried explain why shortly (two words: tornado warning), and focus on problem solving.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/15 02:51 PM
2

Or set her up for some service where she gets the weather warnings as txt messages or something.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/15 02:41 PM
3

Don't tell her you will buy them. Just go, buy them. Install the one in the car yourself before telling her about it. Lead.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/15 01:30 PM
7

Solve the concrete problem. that is what captains do. Buy her a cellphone charger for the car, another for the office, and tell her to stop using airplane mode for that. Besides that, if she wants to ignore weather warnings, well, you can't do anything about that. All you can do is provide good working structures for the crew to hear important announcements from the captain. If the crew regularly ignores them, then you must change their responisibilities accordingly. Since this is a one-time thi…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/15 01:13 PM
1

I realize now that your history reveals you talked to your wife following advice from /r/DeadBedrooms. Here, we think very lowly of that sub because their advice doesn't work. So, take this as a lesson that indeed, it doesn't work. Don't do half MRP half Deadbedrooms. That is the worse. Take the red pill, or just take the blue pill.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/15 01:09 PM
22

THe problem is you. You took the red pill and then asked her to change. that is a beta puke. You take the redpill and change and that will motivate her to change. The pill is not to change her. Is for you to change. It takes time to make these changes. 4 weeks of reading and one night of talking is beta. You don't negotiate these changes with her, as you tried. It only makes you more beta in her eyes. YOU change first. She will notice. Actions is the only thing that matters. Talking is just feed…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/07/15 02:03 PM
2

You assume I want the responsibility of it. I don't. This is known as "the drunk captain" in MRP. You are the captain, you are the leader, you are responsible no matter what. It just happens you have good leadership, and delegate to her the management of the house. Many call this the First Office job, and in many boats, the First Officer is the one that really runs things on the day to day. But they still report to the captain. Your home is your ship. She isn't letting you be a passenger of her …
/r/MarriedRedPill20/07/15 02:39 PM
2

To clarify. Although the Art of War is a great book written by Sun Tzu that applies to MRP, the book The War of Art is a totally different book written by Pressfield. One is about conflict strategy, the other is about self-motivation and getting shit done to succeed.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/07/15 01:17 PM
5

I'll ask her what i can do to help and sometimes it leads to sex. Separate there. Do help her in the kitchen because you want to Do tell her stuff in her ear and rub her because you enjoy doing it. And also, do initiate sex. If you mix them all together, you risk convert contracts. The home is her domain, i just help manage it. This is not the right way to think about it. SHe is not your mom, and you aren't staying at your mom's house. This is your home, and you are the man, the head, the leader…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/07/15 12:04 PM
2

It's the two days when she is being a bitch and you don't care as you are busy and barely noticing when u have turned the corner And only THEN she will internalize your strength, and the hamster starts working for you.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/07/15 11:53 AM
6

The responsibility for the house is yours 100% because you are the captain. From that, you can delegate to valued crew members. You don't negotiate with them what is fair to them, you don't agree them to have penalties on you. After all, it is your vision that says the chores must be done, so you are the most motivated to do this. No matter how fair the system you provide, she will still bitch about it because she just wants to bitch. So decide according to your vision and what is fair for you. …
/r/MarriedRedPill20/07/15 09:28 AM
2

"The War of Art" is a great audiobook about how to reach your goals, how motivation is bullshit and discipline is everything, and how to just get shit done. From the sidebar, the book "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance". I'm not a big fan of the book, but the audiobook is well done, and it is entertaining. All Robert Greene (sidebar) is on audiobook. "A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy" is a great book about Stoic techniques that help with frame, and is also in audiob…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/07/15 07:37 AM
2

What concrete thing do you plan to do this weak to address these issues? The more specific, the better the chances you improve on this.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/15 07:10 PM
4

Something I want to point out is that a lot of the progress you notice still is because she is validating the changes you are making. It is great she notices, but the end goal is that you don't need this validation, you internalize it. This is all stuff you do for yourself, period. The fact that she notices and responds well is good in that she then wants to be improve the relationship with you. But you do this for yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/15 07:07 PM
1

You don't save the marriage. You improve yourself. There is a good chance your marriage is shitty because you haven't been a good leader. So you improve that first. Become a better man, a strong leader, and alpha. If the marriage doesn't work after, well, you know you tried everything, next, spin plates, have fun.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/15 03:45 PM
1

Keep working on yourself. Be more busy, respond less to her. She isn't your parole officer. Don't be a dick about it, just be more busy, check the phone less, etc. As your SMV raises, it will all fall into place. advice besides read the books on the sidebar (I'm on top of that, love to read).? Just finish the books first, and ask specific questions from the books.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/15 03:44 PM
2

I've never had practice at delegating, and I suspect the key is in that. That is the problem. You are the captain. Everything is your responsibility. Everything. If something doesn't get done, you are the only one who can't bitch. However, you must lead, delegate what can be, etc. This is hard work, but it is the key.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/15 03:41 PM
2

she is not likely to go out of her way to initiate Stop bitching about this. Men initiation sex. It is your job to do this, not hers. Man up, alpha up, lead, release your caveman. Only after you do this consistently she will be turned on more.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/15 03:39 PM
1

This is unreadable. I'm going to delete it. Please, clean it up, organize your ideas, use paragraphs and learn the proper use of punctuations marks, and post again after.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/15 03:37 PM
3

It sounds like you were her beta bucks, and she has branch swinged already. Cut your loses, use your SMV to spin plates, alpha up for the next one. It is normal to feel shitty now. It is ok to cry even. Accept these emotions, this is hard. But also, use them to plan good stuff for you, good hobbies or dreams you have been postponing. Shit that adds value to your life. Plan an adventure or something. Do something hard that is just scary enough that if you complete it, you will feel more bad-ass. …
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/15 03:34 PM
1

Just do small dread stuff, to get used to it. Focus more on losing the fat, getting time for yourself for self improvement, etc. Work hard, be patient, don't give up. You can't fix things one afternoon after the pool. So focus on small things for now while you raise your SMV.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/15 03:28 PM
1

MRP is not about helping you pass shit tests. It is about improving your sex life in your marriage. It just happens that if you aren't passing shit tests, this is something you need to work on before sex improves. Similarly, if you are weak and fat, you need to get fit before sex improves.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/07/15 08:08 PM
4

True. He hates the books for making him think hard, so there must be something wrong with them.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/07/15 12:21 PM
1

Great. There are some online interviews with the author where he tells his story of him leaving the church, and redefining himself. I'm not sure if contacting him or his support groups can give you inspiration for these professional changes.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/07/15 12:20 PM
1

My favorite part was when he proposes a time machine that would make him rich, then says he wouldn't use this, then he called you "King Douche" and cried his way home to his mommy.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/07/15 07:41 AM
2

My favorite part was when he said he hadn't read any of the books because they were hard to read. I imagine him with a blanket, crying that he can't improve his life because his wife made him a beta and he has poor reading comprehension, before he takes the blue pill knowingly.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/07/15 07:35 AM
2

Many of us turned Blue Pill thinking that if we were nice enough, we could run away and hide from harsh reality, tough people and so on. If we were nice enough, we wouldn't have to stand for ourselves. If we were nice enough, people would like us. Then in TRP and MRP we are faced with the truth that nobody cares about us. It is our fucking job to add value to life. The opinion of others is freaking irrelevant. This is difficult to internalize, very very hard. I give everyone here the benefit of …
/r/MarriedRedPill17/07/15 07:29 AM
1

It really is. I was thinking of dissecting it to illustrate a lot of standard blue pill ways of thinking, hamstering, and more. It might be helpful for others, because this guy is textbook Mr. Nice Guy (tm).
/r/MarriedRedPill17/07/15 07:25 AM
1

give me the fucking blue pill. Good for you!
/r/MarriedRedPill17/07/15 07:24 AM
1

Read No More Mr. Nice Guy. The author used to be a pastor as well, and discusses a lot more than just sexual strategy (which is the focus of this sub).
/r/MarriedRedPill17/07/15 07:08 AM
1

You don't even understand the basic terms here, and what they mean. Now you are even talking like wive's talk when men transition.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 04:19 PM
1

I willfully have oneitis. This is how a Blue Pill Knight speaks. How did you find this sub exactly?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 04:17 PM
1

Have you even read a single book from the Beginners Guide or the Prereqs?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 03:36 PM
1

If you haven't read a single book of the course prereqs, you shouldn't even be posting here. No wonder you are so sensitive, you haven't even read the basics.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 03:27 PM
2

he got the girl in the end He got the girl, two times!
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 02:54 PM
2

If not, it is fine too. I don't mind those men that refuse to take the pill. Good for them if they like their life.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 02:41 PM
2

We had a few cases of people that acted like him, then came back a few days later with their eyes open, and the right attitude. It doesn't happen all the time, but it can happen. It is up to OP now.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 02:31 PM
2

Well, something we all know is that TRP is something each man must do for himself. It requires owning our shit, swallowing our ego, and taking a step into scary stuff. Not everyone can do it, and i'm fine with that. We only need here the ones are willing to do it. The rest can go to /r/relationships.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 02:28 PM
1

It is painful to open your eyes when you haven't used them before. Let's see if OP decides to keep them closed.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 02:15 PM
3

You are missing out on a very powerful lesson here. You can't hold frame because what others say gets to you. You can't filter the value it in all because of your weak ego. THAT is why your wife isn't attracted to you. Women can smell that. Everyone here identified the problem right away, and are telling it to you, and you are too scared of improving to see it. You lost frame and got defensive at people on the internet. You need to work on Frame. People are telling you that with 2x4s of truth, a…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 02:12 PM
5

This is MRP man. Steel sharpens steel. If you want useless hippy dippy crap, /r/DeadBedrooms is over there. If you don't have the frame to handle a stupid internet forum, how can you have frame to be the alpha you must be in your life?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 01:41 PM
4

I think OP needs a lot of work to Own His Shit before he can see improvements in his marriage.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 01:39 PM
2

Listen to this guy, to be honest. My way of giving advice doesn't pack the punch to open your eyes. So here in MRP, when someone tells you something harsh like that that makes you flinch, think hard about it. Think about why it makes you flinch. It means there is some insecurity it is touching and you have to face it to improve. We call this here a 2x4 of truth. Don't bitch about it, it is the point of the sub. This sub is a tough place. But the best advice you will get will come off in a very t…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 01:37 PM
4

You are pointing out a lot of oneitis in his post which is preventing him from having Outcome Independence.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 01:00 PM
6

You did the right thing by walking away. When in doubt, ignore the shit test. You said you have been reading for a month. DId you finish MMSLP? It has everything you want about improving sex. How is your SMV compared to hers? Do I just start or what? We've always sorta planned it. This suggest you haven't read MMSLP. Planning sex is a turn off for women. Men initiate sex, period. She'll claim she's too tired whenever she doesn't want to screw. Shit test. Just plow through. "You will sleep like a…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 12:49 PM
1

Just before her PMS starts, i have it set up to send me a message that reads "Incoming Shark Attack"
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 12:31 PM
1

Breaking it down into small steps and achievements is a great technique to improve on all these things. It helps us feel confident as well, and motivated.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 09:54 AM
8

MMSLP now.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/07/15 07:28 AM
1

would be something out of the ordinary and something that might excite her. No no no no no! It isn't about you doing what you think she wants you to do. That is seeking approval, and is beta. It is about you doing what you want. Unleash your inner caveman. Grab her, and have sex. Not to make her feel good. But because you are man, and you want sex. THAT is what will excite her.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 03:25 PM
2

Don't tell her she looks admising. Grab her. Let your actions communicate it.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 03:23 PM
8

Then, be happy you are a good captain, keep improving, and reward her for good behavior. If sex is good, feel confident. That is the best metric in the end, better sign than anything else we can tell you here.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 02:49 PM
5

How is the sex life? If sex is great, then, this behavior of her is a result of your good leadership and how she trusts it. If sex is bad, then the lack of shit test might signal she isn't attracted to you at all, and has emotionally given up on you. Not only she doesn't trust your leadership, she doesn't care for it at all. if you've truly internalized the red pill when you'return rarely tested? The shit tests decrease, but never really end. Btw, comfort tests are a kind of shit test. Shit test…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 01:53 PM
2

Explain less with words. Telling wife having a dog is a bad idea is engaging her hamster. Just say "I've decided that not now". Own it. Also, telling her you are working for a better life for her doesn't reassure her at all. She doesn't trust you because those kind of things are not convincing. You can only show it by demonstrating it with ACTIONS. Good to know you internalized this, and will focus on actions.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 01:49 PM
1

Tough for me to meet up with buddies cuz they all have kids and i don't have any Do more activities so you get more friends. Join some new sport group or something. The key is that instead of doing this reacting to her, you have such a great fun life without her that she feels it. The more value you add to your own life, the less her denials will bother you, and the more her hamster will spin.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 08:51 AM
1

I don't think you did too bad. Just focus on your own frame, such this things in the future don't get to you. The less they get to you, the stronger your message will be understood by her. Learn to love the silent treatment.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 08:42 AM
2

Being a leader comes from hard work and vision. If you are worrying about her vision, and you do stuff from that, the actions you do that she doesn't like are those of a jerk. But if you do them from your own vision, what is best according to your criteria, you know that you are doing the best possible, and you don't need her recognition. When a captain tells the crew to clean the deck, they grumble and think he is a jerk. Who cares?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 08:40 AM
6

The problem is that you think of them as chores. Chores imply they are assigned to you by someone. The fact that there is even a line of who does what chores or what is undoable is operating from her frame. Think of yourself as the captain of the boat. This is your boat. The captain works harder than anyone else. He is always working, always inspecting, always fine tuning everything. He delegates to his crew many tasks, but in the end, the responsibility is his alone. If there aren't enough hand…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 08:34 AM
1

Shit test never ever stop. It is a sign she is interested and wants to feel your strength. It is a form of communication, one that if you master, really turns them on.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/15 08:20 AM
1

In the case of the OP the wife knows what she is doing. She knows it very very well, and why it is wrong. Talking more is only giving her more power and attention. Sometimes, children misbehave just to get the attention, and giving them that attention only makes them more likely to misbehave. Shit tests are like that. Giving more attention than needed is not passing the shit test.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/15 02:58 PM
3

Socrates is the fucking man. He would just ask simple questions to people to make their hamster spin out of control until their hamster ran out of steam and the person admitted they were wrong. Also, he could outdrink anyone without losing frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/15 01:11 PM
2

It's really powerful and taking the 1st breath is so much easier than doing the final, scary/tough thing. I do this thing too! By the way, I also strongly recommend to everyone that struggles with this to join a sparring-heavy martial arts. Be it boxing, BJJ, whatever, something where you face another person and can hurt each other. This trains us to not be afraid of others. I suck at BJJ. Everyone here is much bigger than me, so they pummel me. I would become desperate. But by sticking to it, I…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/15 01:09 PM
4

That quote is actually by Socrates. He was condemned to death by his own people for polluting the mind of young men. Now, we consider him The Philosopher, and his points are all sensible and not shocking to us. Remember that when people criticize the pill for polluting the mind of men.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/15 01:03 PM
2

Also, a lot of beta men feel uncomfortable doing manly activities with other men. They can't take the banter or the pressure. You must challenge yourself this way. Go do some new challenging sport. Yes, you will be bad a it. Do it anyway. Getting used to sucking is critical to not be comfortable. Make friends there. This new crew of friends will be critical for you to stop seeking approval in your wife.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/15 12:37 PM
6

The part about leaving with the kids was good and strong. Plan to escalate that in the future, leave longer, or leave by yourself without saying where you are going. The key is to teach her that if she wants to violate them. Talk less, way less. You getting bitchy and all that was just operating from her frame. You are strong, you don't need her at all in your life. you just do what is best for yourself, period. Boundaries are established simply by coming up with concrete actions to do when viol…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/15 09:46 AM
0

It is a lot of work to keep track of the vote brigades and take care of them. Sorry I can't document it for your entertainment.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/15 09:11 AM
0

I deleted the comments because that way the trolls feel helpless that we cleaned their vandalism.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/15 07:07 PM
2

Owning your shit is what men do. Now you know the problem, you can plan to overcome it. Give yourself a pat in the back, this is what improving yourself is all about.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/15 12:09 PM
4

When you have Frame, you don't have to hold frame, the Frame Holds YOU and keeps you focused on what is important.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/15 10:15 AM
3

That is concrete improvement. Focus on concrete actions like that. Women's promises aren't like men's, they change with their moods. Don't try to change her to back up her word, that is not accepting women for whom they are. So if the last name isn't important for you, let it go, and instead, focus to lead in areas that are truly critical and important for you first. Lead focusing on the concrete, the here and the now. The rest will follow once she respects your leadership.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/15 07:23 AM
2

If you want her to change her behavior you need to enforce consequences. Talking only makes you look weak and encourages her.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/07/15 08:11 PM
2

Shit test. A good recomendation is to not just start with the 10s kiss. Start with a half second kiss, then ramp it to 1s, then to 2, etc.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/07/15 06:34 PM
3

If it isn't important to you personally, why bother? In not all cultures women change their last name. If she has been stalling for 5 years, clearly just talking and asking about it isn't going to make a difference, as you have tried it already. You say it isn't important, but you also sound very hurt by this. I'm guessing that she isn't changing her name only because women know very well how to get to men, and she knows this is something she controls that upsets you.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/07/15 05:30 PM
2

Message the moderators with details
/r/MarriedRedPill10/07/15 01:32 PM
9

You can't pass a shittest after it is over. Just accept you missed it, and prepare for the next. The good thing about shit tests is women are very generous by giving you so many of them.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/07/15 11:54 AM
1

Use the app called Clue. You just keep loging in her moods, sex, etc. The more frequently you add details, the smarter it gets. It works even for irregular woman a bit, as it adapts dynamically. The more irregular, the more data you have to input to for the software to get good at predicting. You can even set it up to give you discreet warning messages. With this, i can predict my wife's period better than her. I can even tell when shit tests are coming, and about what, before she opens her mout…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/07/15 11:53 AM
7

I encourage him to post more. And he can request flair anytime.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/07/15 11:50 AM
5

should probably man up and just take the kid to the park Do this all the fucking time. Otherwise, you are accepting her frame that She is the Decider of the kids. Never accept that, you are the leader. You delegate stuff to her, and part of that stuff can be the kids, but in the end, you are ultimately responsible. It is a lot of work to spend time with kids. But part of the problems with society and why TRP exists is that kids lack male role models, and grow up seeking approval of women. It is …
/r/MarriedRedPill10/07/15 08:06 AM
2

Kids are a great place to demonstrate your leadership. Planning stuff like this IS a lot of work, but leaders are the ones that must work the most anyway. So just Own It, and do it, and plan some fun stuff with the kids.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/07/15 08:03 AM
3

It doesn't work so well. There is a phenomemenon where the first few votes matter a lot more than the other, they start a band-wagon effect. Sometimes we get some bluepill advice, and a few other people that are transitioning see it, and go and upvote it, and many without reading carefully also upvote. Unfortunately, the reddit system is good for creating a crowd mentality, but it isn't good at all to make people think for themselves and own their shit.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/07/15 07:25 AM
6

You can do dread while spending time with your kids. Nothing like having a blast with my own son to demonstrate with actions my wife's crap won't get to us. I had posted this example before, I'm copying here because it is relevant. My wife sometimes admits feels jealous of how much my son loves spending time with me. It is ridiculous, she should be pleased that I'm such a good father. Besides, it isn't THAT hard. I make sure to budget time to play with him regularly. Wife instead says she gets b…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/07/15 07:21 AM
1

Please, read "When I say now, I feel guilty". Fogging is one of the essential techniques there to not lose frame when wife tries to fight. There are other techniques. If I try to summarize Fogging, it will not be sufficient, you will try it, you will do it wrong, and then you will think I'm full of shit. Read WISNIFG. With that warning out of the way, Fogging is the tactic of, when someone tries to start a fight about something, you don't give them anything to fight against, you don't push back,…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/07/15 07:32 PM
1

Read MMSLP. It has a part dedicated to the Man Action Plan (MAP). I need actions to implement into my interpersonal dynamics with my wife. Read NMMNG and WISIFG. If you master it, read TRP stuff about Game to compliment the Game stuff from MMSLP. In other words, read the beginner's guide on the sidebar, and ask specific questions from there.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/07/15 07:12 PM
7

How do you guys stop from being SO ANGRY all the time? Gym. BJJ. Spending more time on myself, with friends. It is the best antidote to the anger stage. Channel that anger for self improvement.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/07/15 08:03 AM
2

Of course my wife thinks I'm being obsessive, that I don't need to lose weight, that I don't eat enough, etc., etc. She can think whatever she wants. But she isn't the judge of you. You are a man, you are the judge of you, and you are a tough judge. Stay consistent throwing the food away just so she pairs that she is wasting food and can't change your mind about this.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/07/15 07:58 AM
7

This is a very low-effort post. All we can advice is start by reading the Guide for Beginners in the side bar, and ask specific question as you read.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/07/15 07:25 AM
1

Yes, exactly. Nice Guys think that since they are nice, the woman will love them and do as they want. This guy here got cuckolded, and is now trying to somehow think this gives him the moral highground, so he is SOOOOO nice that she WILL do as she wants. He feels strong, but this is a terrible beta puke, the worse kind i've read here. This is not the way to build attraction. She is doing those things out of guilt of getting caught, not out of attraction.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/07/15 11:25 AM
1

And it is your job to impose consequences, not to feel smug about being cuckolded because it gives you moral leverage.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/07/15 11:23 AM
2

continue in this relationship where I will forever have the upper hand as the non-cheater. This is a covert contract. This kind of logic is the worse beta nice guy logic. You can't create attraction from blackmail. You can't create attracting from moral highground.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/07/15 11:21 AM
6

I am not sure I'll get another chance with her before my transformation kicks in. You got it backwards. Your transformation will not kick in because you crave another chance first with her. This shit sucks. You can't change her. Outcome Independence. Become the best of you for yourself, it is the only way forward no matter what she does.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/07/15 07:10 AM
1

Shit test. Don't give in. Act like her ultimatum didn't register. Just keep saying BJJ is important for you. Eventually, she will bitch to a friend, and her friend will tell her BJJ is combat, and not sexual at all, that she is being silly, and it will fizzle away. However, if you try to explain that, it will back fire. Don't explain or defend it.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/07/15 12:20 PM
1

I agree with you in spirit fully. If i wasn't a mod, i would be saying what you are saying. However, since I'm a mod, I feel a lot of responsibility to this community and its potential. Many users had provided tons of excellent original contents here that is very valuable, and it is my job to do what i can so it reaches the audience it deserves. If I said "screw it, i don't care", i wouldn't be doing my job well. I do agree that things might be better in another forum with better moderation tool…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 10:09 PM
1

The issue isn't that. The firing was just the Frans Ferdinand moment of the war. Users are making it about the firing to put a face on the thing, but mods are clear this is not the main issue. The real issue has been going on for a while now, and includes censorship, and lack of communications with Mods. The mod tools suck, and reddit admins know this for years. Instead of having guidelines and improving the mod tools to manage subs according to them, they started to close subs without warning. …
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 08:46 PM
1

Here is a post in TRP about this issue.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 01:45 PM
1

I understand. I was hoping that with other mod tools we could develop something that was valuable for all levels. Thanks for all your great contributions.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 01:23 PM
2

/r/PaoYongYang/ is a whole subreddit dedicated to stuff like that that is trending now.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 11:39 AM
2

I for certain don't want us to seem like we support Pao, as she is the biggest threat to TRP. Update This NYT article has the following paragraphs (annotated by me) There has also been tension between factions of the Reddit community and Ellen Pao, the company’s interim chief executive, whom many Reddit users blame for imposing the anti-harassment policies. This refers to her threat to ban certain subreddits. Most people assume TRP might is one of those she will come after. Reddit users have als…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 10:52 AM
1

Almost all big subs are private now. This is certainly much bigger anyone expected. Even BBC has reported it now. Update Some of the big subs are back. There are reports of fights between mods, some siding with Headquarters. Users are submitting contents in protest that is being deleted.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 10:39 AM
2

"You look stressed..." "I'm just focused on this." and smile. The key is to make her feel comfortable by showing you are in command of things. You don't want her to worry that your stress will affect her. So own it, signal that it is contain, you are getting shit done. With time, she will internalize that when you are stressed, you got it, you won't puke it out on her.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 09:03 AM
3

Own It. You are just interested in self improvement. No more details. She will pressure and ask more, Own It. You don't need to Justify, Explain, or Defend why.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 09:01 AM
2

If they like the new you, then, those guys might want to become friends with you. You can do manly activities together, etc. In their time, they will find the pill. Don't preach the pill. Just act your way, and they will see it by themselves.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 09:00 AM
1

You can lose 2lbs a week safely. That is less than 5 months. Work on that, on reading, and on Frame. As you start changing, she will feel it. You don't need to have reached your goal for her hamster to start spinning. However, you do have to communicate with actions (not words) that you will reach the goal no matter what happens. It takes time to change your mentality as well. Work on that.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 08:59 AM
1

Is it ok for me to care or not care what she does with her free time? I delegate, and as long as she does what is needed, i don't care how. Trying to control everything without good reasons of how this impacts your vision makes you seem weak, like that clueless boss that tries to micromanage without a clue.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 08:57 AM
1

What concrete things they do that makes them "jerks"? Without concrete things, it isn't possible to answer how to respond to them. For example, if their problem is who they are, well, why does that matter to you?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 08:54 AM
1

You don't have to justify yourself to her at all. As others have said, either just say the truth "I want to dress like this", or just make a joke about it to show you don't care to justify yourself to her.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 08:48 AM
5

The Sex Grocery Method.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 07:24 AM
1

I'll keep in mind the friends thing. NO. Go do it. Now. Get male friends. Join a sport activity to hang out with manly men. Go do it. This is key for the emotional aspects of holding Frame. This is key for making you feel your own strength, and stop looking for validation from women, which is what will give you the edge to enjoy the silent treatment. Your validation in life can't come from women. It comes from you, and from hanging out with other Captains and sharing stories. Some say that you a…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 07:23 AM
3

I learned to love the silent treatment. Nothing like peace and quite while i sit in the balcony to have a beer. Even better, i go out with friends, and she is quiet instead of bitching. Silent treatment is a gift women give us. They give us this gift because they misunderstand sexual strategy, and silent treatment only works with feminized betas. Let me explain. In TRP one of the ideas is that the most important currency of men is their time, and women crave attention. So, men have a lot of powe…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 07:17 AM
1

I agree that we need to better manage the low-value generic insecure posts by newbies. However, banning is just one tool mods have, we have others to accomplish this. Since newbies, by definition, are clueless, we can just delete some of the low quality posts with a generic warning to tell them this is in the guide for beginners, or to not post too much. We can try that to see how it works. Also, i find your posts telling newbies when they are whining very very helpful for everyone.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/07/15 07:10 AM
3

This isn't a shit test. Shit tests are ways they measure your vision to see if you are worth fucking. This is just her trying to get dirt against you for legal proceedings. Don't let your ego blind you, play it nice and distant.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/07/15 07:53 AM
2

they seem impossible. Break them down in small steps. Instead of thinking of getting a black belt, first, get a black stripe on the white belt. Then the next stripe. Etc. Work hard on each of those stages, very hard. Remember also that the belt is just a "token" to demonstrate your hard effort. But the belt doesn't give you powers, nor makes you better in itself. The only thing that makes you better is the discipline to keep practicing regularly.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/07/15 07:41 AM
1

What are some things I can practice to learn that mental endurance Join a martial arts club, something with plenty of sparring. Boxing, MMA, BJJ, they are all popular in TRP, but what matters is that the instructor is good, and that you spar. The scariest thing is to go the first day. After that, just promise yourself you won't miss a class for 3 months. Motivation is irrelevant, just go, discipline is what matters. Go when you feel like you don't want to. Go when you have better things to do. J…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/07/15 07:37 AM
2

Bro if you could only hear the self rightous spew that comes from this womans mouth. I tell ya, if she said my dick was 10inches it would be true. But the thing is she can believe whatever she wants. But you have reality on your side. You can laugh at that.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/07/15 12:24 PM
4

You write a very open ended question. The thing is how will this affect your family? Well, if you don't know this, it means your family is now in a ship without a captain. You have been slacking off, drunk, not leading. It is time to sober up, and captain. Will they not trust you at the beginning? Of course. WIll things change? Of course. Where will this ship end? It will be up to you. The place your family will go is 100% your responsibility. If you don't see where that will be, it is because y…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/07/15 12:21 PM
1

This is an excellent point. I'm writing something about this, I'll emphasize it.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/15 01:44 PM
1

Please, put this in the guidelines, for new users to find.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/06/15 01:40 PM
1

Why do you care what they think of you? They are shaming you for your self improvement, trying to keep you plugged in. Why give value to the opiniion people that are criticizing how you are increasing your value?
/r/MarriedRedPill29/06/15 02:49 PM
1

I made one like this, and put it up for a while, like 24hours, but some of the mods objected to it, so I took it down. Not everyone subscribes to the Captain model, so it isn't representative enough.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/06/15 12:27 PM
1

I suggested something just like this, but some of the mods didn't like it. We tried many things, but were unable to find a consensus.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/06/15 12:26 PM
1

I proposed something similar to the other mods. We couldn't reach an agreement of what was a good symbol for everyone.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/06/15 12:26 PM
1

The guy wanted to talk about it in purplepilldebate. See here. It was name calling, taunts, and childish behavior. He was in particular attacking people in this thread. I explained from the mod's perspective how I decided to ban him here. After that, he disappeared, abandoned his account. Nice closure.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/06/15 03:05 PM
2

Many people take the pill, and start making small changes, and they get scared of their wive's reactions, and think that in the first week, they have the main event, and it will be smooth sailing after. No. Main event is after months of consistent changes. It is her last big try to see if you are for real or not. But even after, she will keep testing you. This is how they operate. It is your responsibility to maintain frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/06/15 09:55 AM
3

Remember, anger isn't bad in itself. I would have been royally pissed off then, and it is ok to let others know that you are pissed. The problem with anger is that it gives us a false sense of power and effectiveness even when we are not being effective. That is, when angry, we do stupid shit, feel entitled to it, but in the big picture, this stuff hurts our chances to get what we want. If we focus our anger, and let it show at the right moment, we honor it, and we use it well. If we let our ang…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/06/15 08:13 AM
1

OP could leave for a coffee shop with wifi, or even use the cellphone for network connection. Or do as you did, and have an office. The key is that if for your work you need to do stuff like that, be professional about it, and doing in a way it doesn't stress your family. You are the captain, when the sailors see the captain lose their cool, the feel nervous, and lose respect and trust.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/06/15 06:28 PM
4

Next time, instead of calling her a bitch, just leave as soon as she is a bitch. It is so much more powerful when her Hamster tells her she is a bitch than when you tell her.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/06/15 12:42 PM
1

I'd expect that result from anyone but the awesomest of wives or an experienced professional. Most women I've encountered recoil with shock/disgust if you walk up to them and just ask for a BJ. I want to point out that this rejection happened in your mind, and from that rejection in your mind, your actions followed. That is, you decided you didn't deserve this. No wonder nobody believes you don't! How does one want sex, but not care if it doesn't happen? I have a post on just this. If you want t…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/06/15 06:43 PM
1

I would add that the frame "you are wrong" implies a more profound frame which is: "Wife is the judge of your life". THAT is the one you need to win against. Her opinion is irrelevant because she isn't your judge. Therefore, ignore the opinion, and demonstrate with actions, you don't care about her judgment.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/06/15 11:10 AM
4

That sounds good. Also, if it was a Sunday evening and you had no choice, you could just leave the house briefly to work. Make the calls, do what needs to be done, then, do something to relax, and come home. Separating this stuff is very soothing for wives, because they can't take the stressors from our work, it makes them feel scared and insecure.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 01:29 PM
1

This is a very well thought out position. Keep going forward, use this to to push yourself forward. It sucks, but we must use everything to improve ourselves, especially the hard stuff.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 12:49 PM
7

What concrete thing will you do next sunday to fix this? Spell it out, the more concrete, the easier it will be to be accountable, and to correct.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 12:23 PM
1

Thanks for the pat in the back. I will finish the series. The next part is on Emotional Basis, which is the one less discussed in TRP. It is taking longer because I got a lot on my plate, and i have to compile a lot of the resources. However, what I can highlight now is that the goal of Frame is not sexual strategy. Frame is about your inner strength and your vision. Frame is for you. However, once you have a good Frame, it does make you attractive to women. In fact, a good Frame carries you thr…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 11:40 AM
2

I just subscribed, and will listen to all the episodes. I'll give you feedback soon after. I think this is a very good project, something the community needed.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 09:59 AM
2

This chick made it through deployments and me going through a drinking issue for a while but what the fuck. It is good of you to appreciate her support during your hard times. But this doesn't excuse her behavior. Just like your own problems weren't excusable either. There is no one keeping score of who did worse when. This stuff doesn't cancel out, thinking that way is a covert contract. What matters is the now, and where you will take the now onto the future. Stuff that is valuable to you from…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 09:46 AM
3

I second this. Less talk is better communication in this case. Withdraw comfort while you decide what to do.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 09:19 AM
3

I'm not sure if you know this, but some of your posts helped me really understand and internalize how women love men in a different way that men feel love for women. All this is to say I know you know your shit very well, so take why I write more as a reminder so you stay focused. Accept AWALT. Even in marriage, if you slide, you will see it. The burden is on you fully. Whatever you do in the end, don't do it from butt-hurt weakness, do it from alpha strength. This is hurtful for sure, but it is…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 09:17 AM
3

I respect whatever choice you make. With that said, you know AWALT. This is their nature. It is understandable you are upset, but women can't do better than that, it is their nature. Being angry is perfectly reasonable, as this was cheating, and you must take measures. But also, ask yourself, is part of your anger coming from realizing she isn't a unicorn? If so, then, process that anger like a Stoic, facing reality, AWALT. That secondary anger based on your wrong expectations is something you c…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 09:15 AM
2

From Marcus Aurelius, I learned to keep a diary where I reflect on what i did, and how i could have improved. It is very helpful. It helps me stay accountable, and even helps me identify my hamstering. I try to use this community either to add to it, or asks questions that i can learn from (and i hope that others also learn from it as well).
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/15 09:06 AM
1

Just lurk around for a while, read the stuff, and then after reading, ask questions about the material. This is a process.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/06/15 02:18 PM
1

I guess you haven't seen the sidebar's Guide for Beginners.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/06/15 09:17 AM
6

they are uncomfortable being anything other than the Nice Guy Yes, but that isn't what MRP says they should do. That is just part of the struggles during the transition. A good image for all is to be a Good Man. Not a nice guy, a Good Man. One that people trust, one that shows up to the scene, and everyones feels safer because they trust his leadership. One that knows where he is going in life. A Captain.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/06/15 05:46 AM
5

There is good stuff in TRP and junk. Each man must construct their own canon. This is essential. You read, you study, you think. Even if you disagree with some, think hard about that, and come up with your own position. I found that even the posts about how to spin sorority plates have insights that i found valuable, even though i'm not in that stage in my life. In the end, what matters is you challenge your own views to construct stronger view. TRP has a lot of material for that. Read, even if …
/r/MarriedRedPill06/06/15 07:54 PM
2

What are you doing concretely to "work on it"? Until you have a plan with clear milestones, metrics, and consequences, you won't make measurable progress in changing the bad habit. Plan something to overcome this, and post it in the Own Your Shit, and make yourself accountable. Just thinking "i have to get better at this" isn't enough to change a habit. You can do it. Go do it. Make it concrete.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/06/15 07:30 PM
1

If you are just hiding your plans for no particular reason, then, you are just an asshole, and doing this won't achieve anything except to show her that. If it is a logistical issue, tell her. You don't need to excuse why you are working late, nor need her permission, but if it has an impact on her plans, then tell her. When you start doing stuff arbitrarily like this it makes her trust your leadership LESS. It is unattractive. Leaders don't need to explain their reasons to everyone. But also, t…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/15 02:28 PM
3

For me, ultimately, the pill is accepting reality and using reality to gain our goals. Hypergamy, shit tests, all that, it is reality. I also accept different men have different goals in life. MRP started from men that discovered TRP while in marriage. You have already a lot going on in life, a lot of it very good, and maybe spinning plates isn't what you want at the moment. So you learn about woman, and use it for your goals. In a nutshell, the pill is the way to see reality. I respect men that…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/15 02:10 PM
2

Since it is a diary, it wasn't intended for others to read. So it is all over the place. However, he is such a good writer that he has many great nuggets of wisdom that stand along. It seems hard to read, but then you find one of those and it is all worth it.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/15 02:02 PM
1

Fuck the tv. It always gets me. What are you going to do about it then? This sounds like an easy problem to fix under your control.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/15 09:45 AM
6

Remember: disciplining children is about YOU being disciplined and consistent about how you interact with them. That is how they learn. The one that has to have clear goals, and act coherently to reward and punish the behaviours is YOU. This also means it is your job, not your children's, to understand teaching takes time, so if you are trying to change their behavior, accept that yelling once won't just fix things. You need consistent discipline to make them change, and it will take time. Focus…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/15 09:44 AM
1

Women are responsible for their choices. TRP doesn't tell you to accept their choices. If she cheats on you, you don't have to just forgive it and do nothing. She is responsible for being dishonest and violating her vows. But TRP does tell you to accept the inherent evolutionary motivation behind them. Even women that decide to not act on those impulses are still motivated by them. By understanding and accepting that, we can use them to our advantage.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/15 09:39 AM
3

Marcus Aurelius, the roman emperor and practicioner of Stoicism, wrote in his diary that "Misfortune born nobly is good fortune". This means that instead of bitching about how reality isn't fair like a weak butt-hurt beta, if we face reality with strength and nobility and accept it for what it is, we can indeed transform things to our advantage. By accepting women for who they really are, you can even understand how shit tests are FEATURES. By accepting that we only control ourselves, we can und…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/15 09:36 AM
1

How do you guys teach your young kids how to recognize and admit their mistakes, and "make them right"? You make them face consequences. For example, let's say your kid likes to play and hide in the gardening shack. So he goes there but makes a mess with the gardening tools. You tell him that he needs to put them back in order. If he doesn't, or he makes a mess again, you lock the shack. That is all. He knows why. If he brings it up, you tell him the problem (the mess). Then ask him what he thin…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/06/15 08:43 AM
1

Remember that measuring body fat is very unreliable (unless you do expensive tests). The calipers and the electrical measurements have huge systematic errors, so they are all over the place. I do use those to get a rough idea if i'm moving towards my goal, but the net number is irrelevant for those. Because of that, many people do believe in the "six pack" test as the more reliable goal for low BFP. Also, remember, low BFP in itself isn't attractive. You want to look strong and masculine, which …
/r/MarriedRedPill04/06/15 10:16 AM
1

Done as well.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 04:31 PM
1

Do you mean put it in the wiki?
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 03:52 PM
1

Discipline must come from you. It is your responsibility as the captain. You chose to delegate that to her. If she is behaving poorly in this role, it is your job to withdraw resposibility because it was your poor choice. The priority is having a well running ship. Only after you take care of that you can consider how to train her. And do other things. But your priority is not training her. Your priority is to have things run well, which include giving your kids a good environment. In a ship, if…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/05/15 05:13 AM
0

For hypertrophy (big muscles) nothing beats lifting heavy objects. End of story. However, anything is better than doing nothing. Bodyweight training is good for a lot of stuff, including martial arts, gymnastics, dancing, stuff where you need to control your body very well. It helps even to control your body movements in bed. But it will take you MUCH longer to see changes in the size of your muscles, but it can be done. You would be going for a different kind of body, and taking a longer time t…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 08:07 PM
2

I said that disciplining her IS more work for you. So if you dont want to do it, it wont work. Accept it. Telling her to do what you want is just engaging her hamster. You misunderstood completely what i said. I said discipline is for you. It is more work for you. It can't be substituted with talking.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 04:18 PM
3

It is really YOU being the more disciplined one in the whole whose, and everyone else adjusting to that, and improving their behavior. This is where true authority comes from. I'll just start sending her to our room when she yells at the kids and see how that goes. NO. Don't do that. If you do, she will fight YOU about that and take the anger at you "YOu can't tell me where to go!!!!". It is the same mistake as arguing with my son about not throwing the toys. It just makes him scream more. Don't…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 02:33 PM
8

Red pill is about you changing. Not about changing her. Telling her to read this stuff is you being weak, pleading to change. Women smell this weakness, of course she went ballistic. This is what happens when you talk about TRP. THe problem isn't how she reacted, is that you talked about TRP. It is your bad 100%.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 02:27 PM
5

This is like giving a dog a dog training manual to read to see if it improves its behavior. You can't force her to become a RPW. You can't use internet authority to convince her because all she has to do is find another internet authority. All you can do is alpha up, and with actions, if she wants, she might decide to become a RPW. THe rest is engaging her hamster.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 02:26 PM
22

I have a small child that is at an age where he is testing testing testing. When he is angry, he takes it on his toys. He throws them, sometimes at the TV. This is unacceptable, but he is small, he is learning. To teach him, I have to be disciplined. Discipline is about ME as a father, not about him. The one that has to be disciplined and consistent is me. So this is what I do. Everytime he throws a toy, calmly but firmly I take the toys away from him, then, I remove him from the space, and put …
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 02:23 PM
1

This is not for the OP, but something the OP said got me thinking. I think in the sidebar we should have the book "War of Art". It is a no-nonsense book about how people think they need motivation to get shit done, but that is total bullshit. The people that get shit done don't do it because they have motivation, they do it because they are disciplined. Success has nothing to do with motivation, and all with just doing the work, period. I highly recommend the book "War of Art". Discipline has NO…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/15 10:32 AM
2

A common misconception is that Stoicism is about not feeling emotions. This comes from the modern use of the word stoic (lowercase). However, this is against Stoicism. The Stoics accept emotions are part of life, and it is stupid to want reality to change. They accept emotions as they are, and live with them and through them. However, they reject the idea that we are ruled by emotions. We do have control about how to interpret them, how we act from them, how we approach them. A lot of the techni…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/15 09:41 AM
2

Amazing post. I had written a related (but more narrowly focused) post explaining Outcome Independence from a Stoic point of view.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/15 07:15 AM
1

The reason why I find value in this sub is because of that criticism. I can do the reading on my own, and i usually understand things. However, it is all too easy for me to trick myself and not see my own flaws. Men have a hamster too. That is always the biggest obstacle for my self improvement. I've been criticized here many times. It stings at time, or it puts me in denial. But I take special care to think hard about the criticism that makes me feel uncomfortable, the one that pisses me off. I…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/15 07:08 AM
1

If you have something nice and well thought out, do post again.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/15 08:22 PM
1

You should have seen the "debating" he did in my inbox. Mostly empty name calling, teenage taunts, etc. The sad thing is that if he had read the books we recommended to him, he would have learned why those behaviors only reflect poorly on him, and are not assertive nor manly.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/15 07:54 PM
1

If this guy wants to debate his ideas about relationships, this is a great sub for that, and you are a great debater as well to take him on. However, this post he wrote is just a tantrum. I have a small child, so I know how to deal with these very well, which is to let them have the tantrum by themselves until they tire themselves out. But if in the future he wants to debate theory with you, I think that would be great.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/15 07:49 PM
2

Yes. The guy kept asking what was wrong with what he said, and all were classic mistakes addressed in the prereqs. I pointed out specific books he should read, but he didn't want to read, he just wanted to debate about something he admitted he didn't know anything about.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 12:57 PM
2

The official reason was not that he disagreed with the core concepts (although he didn't know what they were). It is that he was giving (bad) advice while being honest he hadn't read the required reading. We asked him to lurk more and cool off multiple times, eventually mentioning a temp ban if he didn't, but he just threw a tantrum, telling us what this sub should be about, even though he had been here for 3 days only. Then he violated the guidelines again more, so we banned him. Now he is tryi…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 12:56 PM
5

Yeah. The user is now ranting in PurplePillDebate and even in TheBluePill looking for someone to side with him. It doesn't seem to be working. Maybe he needs to include more pics of Brad Pitt to see if that helps?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 12:50 PM
2

This guy has so little frame he lost his mind and has been throwing a tantrum for days only because he faces the consequences of knowingly violating the guidelines of a tiny internet forum.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 12:49 PM
4

He is misrepresenting the situation trying to lure me into a "I said/he said" argument because he has expressed he wants to me to debate him on why his blue pill methods don't work. I'm not interested in that, as our decision to ban him was based on him not following the guidelines by insisting to give advice without doing the required reading first. If we wants to advice without reading the books he will be welcomed in /r/relationships, and can debate his ideas there.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/15 12:10 PM
8

I'd like to hear the mod's side I'll bite. Although the ban was discussed by all the mods, I’m the one that actually enforced it. This has made me the target of a tantrum by the OP. OP was giving constant blue pill advice while admitting he hadn't read the material yet. He wasn't banned for the bad advice. However, because of the bad advice, users reported him to the mods, which caught our attention. Our policy is that we don't allow new users that haven't done the basic reading to advice. The r…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/15 10:07 AM
2

It is like coming to discuss in a philosophy class without having read the materials, then trying to hide it by talking more, exposing he hasn't done the reading, then throwing a tantrum when told he is derailing the discussion, then demanding that instead of him doing the reading the burden is on us to explain why his arguments are not related to the reading.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 06:00 AM
1

It is because it is that small brigades and trolls come here. In a bigger sub the votes and reporting take care of those easily.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 05:42 AM
1

His tantrum took him to PPD and in TBP seeking sympathy. He isn't getting it so he is in full DEER mode.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/15 05:26 AM
2

One of the hardest things to internalize about Frame is that demanding respect is weak, and makes people respect you less. The only way people respect you is if you respect yourself and act from that.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 06:51 PM
2

Since you find it amusing I'll quote some of the funniest things he has said in his tantrum. After multiple warnings by various mods asking him to stop giving blue pill advice and to just lurk more, I gave him the last warning mentioning a possible temporary ban to allow him to focus on lurking. This is what he said: Are you seriously suggesting that you are going to treat me (a 31 year old man) like you would treat a 4 year old child? I think your problem is that you don't know how to treat peo…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 06:37 PM
2

truly believe and maintain a BP mindset in the face of evidence to the contrary Yeah. To top it off this guy claimed to be RP right until we banned him, and then he started throwing the generic attacks of blue pill trolls to TRP that we are bored of seeing.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 06:24 PM
2

I think he believes he is trying to convince me he is smarter than the mods or something. He is even mentioning his age to 'prove' he is experienced. I hadn't heard that since grade school. That i might remember. The rest is just all-purpose taunts and insults, plus the generic attacks againts TRP we get from blue pill trolls. I guess this is how puking the pill looks like.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 05:33 PM
10

The banned dude mentioned above is throwing a childish tantrum in my inbox. I banned him because he insisted on giving (bad) advice without even reading the basics here. We warned him multiple times to lurk more and finish the required reading before advising, very nicely. I then warned him about an incoming temporary ban to enforce this, and he responded with insults, and violating the guidelines more. If you are reading this, dude, I recommend you read both NMMNG and WISNIFG and work on your f…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 04:50 PM
1

Another one i thought is people that come reading and want to share with their wives what they are learning by talking (telling the about TRP) or even having them read the books. This is a very weak intellectual grasp of the concepts, because the only way women understand is when they test you and you pass the test. I'm not saying you should hide the books, but i am saying you shouldn't expect women to read them and want to help you out with your changes. That is like giving a dog a dog trainer'…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 06:22 AM
3

We get this question asked once a month. The answer is you share what you learn not by having her read it, but by changing your actions. Period.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 06:20 AM
1

Another one I thought is to understand the different ways of communicating: body language, facial expressions, gestures, posture, actions, tone of voice and finally, words. From those, society teaches us that words are all we need, but in fact, they are the weakest of all, especially of the other communication methods don't send the same simple message. This is also why txting is so ineffective, and only feeds the hamster of women.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 06:18 AM
1

I find the discussions in /r/asktrp to be very low quality because it is guys that haven't done the work advising guys that don't want to do the work. Often is full of blue pill advice.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 06:15 AM
2

The app is Clue. It is discreet. You can input her moods and sex drive, and it adjust her period to improve the predictions. It also allows you to write in alerts. Before PMS i get a message that says "incoming shark attack".
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 05:22 PM
1

Learning about shit test. Understanding that relationships work in polarities, so if you want her to submit, the one that has to change is you so you dominate more. Identify your covert contracts. Understand kino as ways to communicate. Learn how to communicate w actions, instead of talking talking talking. Understand the importance of alpha and comfort. Learn how to use emotions to make your woman excited. There are many more, but there is no exhaustive list. Read the sidebar is the best i can …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 03:36 PM
2

I second this book for the OP.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 02:25 PM
1

I need to focus on things that I enjoy when I get home, regardless of the wife's schedule. Exactly. Once you get used to this and it becomes comfortable emotionally, your frame will become stronger, and she will feel it, and will react positively to it. But the key is to focus on yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 07:33 AM
1

This is all terrible advice. Telling new people to go to level 10 dread is a Victim Puke, the worse of beta behavior, and against the advice of Levels of Dread. We asked you nicely to lurk more before advising, as you are giving blue pill advice repeatedly.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 07:15 AM
1

Talking to his wife won't change anything. Talking is blue pill advice, it is the wrong idea that engaging the hamster is the way to fix the relationship. This never works, and is operating from the frame of her hamster. Telling a newbie to go nuclear at the beginning is a Beta Victim Puke from NMMNG. This is terrible destructive blue pill advice. We warned you enough time, so enjoy your time as you lurk.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/15 07:14 AM
2

My job as a mod is to keep this sub growing without letting it be overrun w blue pill advice. If users post blue pill advice we warn them first and then put them on time out to give them a chance to lurk more.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 04:27 PM
3

The key is to stop searching for shit tests. Stop trying to expect them. That is reactive. It is still operating from her frame where she dictates the rhythm of things. Instead, work on yourself, on your frame. That is what really matters in the end. Shit tests test the frame. What is important is not to study for the test, what is important is to have frame. Use the time without shit tests to work on your frame. The shit tests never end. They are a feature of woman, embrace them, welcome them, …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 02:29 PM
1

Yes. Taking it easy feels like losing time, but reinjuring is losing more time.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 02:12 PM
2

This is a covert contract. The only way to get rid of them is to identify them, and then, really figure out what is the deep need under it, and plan how you will fulfill it yourself. For example, if you think "She should stay home to hang out with me. doesn't she miss me?" well,t hat is just hamstering for "I miss her and wish she made me feel valued". Then, you act on "feeling valued" and do something for YOU to feel valued. Stuff that i like to do is do something NICE for myself. Buy myself a …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 01:47 PM
2

In martial arts there is something called "the white belt mentality". White belts is what beginners wear. A good white belt isn't the one that kicks ass. It is one that doesn't have an ego, and is willing to learn from everyone else at all times. So, when you spar, even if the white belt loses often, his mindset should be in thanking his opponent for allow him to learn stuff in the process. This often leads to candid exchanges where the opponents explains some technique, or how to defend from it…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 01:38 PM
2

I've update it to say "Unplugging", following your reference. You might need to update it for it to show up. Let me know. If you want another one, just message the mods.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 01:33 PM
1

Get back up and keep on going. It sucks to fall down. But as long as we learn and become stronger, each fall help us improve.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 12:58 PM
2

I don't understand, i think some details are missing. You wanted to talk about some problem (will that help?), but then you chickened out because of her. What happened that the problem in the open now?
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 12:43 PM
2

This is hypoglicemic shock, a low blood sugar shock. You need to be careful around those. If this happens again, just eat something with a lot of sugar, like a soda or a candy, or honey or just raw sugar. You should feel better in a few minutes. If not desperate just eat bread or a banana. Remember, muscles are made in the kitchen. This means that if you work out hard but don't eat well and enough, you don't build muscle mass, you might even lose muscle. Usually something high in protein before …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 12:37 PM
1

That sucks man. And on a warmup set, what a freak accident.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 12:31 PM
1

It would be better something like "swallowing the pill" to indicate the fundamentals haven't been internalized yet. We are all here because we are all learning. Part of having frame is to accept that we have to constantly learn more, we never learn enough, when we think we have learned enough, it just means we are sliding back to beta. There is nothing wrong with that. However, there is a difference when people haven't internalized the fundamentals. It doesn't matter if you think you took the pi…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 11:13 AM
2

I feel the same way. I'm here because i'm learning.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 11:13 AM
1

Have you read NMMNG? Have you done the activities there? All of them? a lot of the stuff you write is classic Nice Guy thinking.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 10:34 AM
4

The way you pile through her insecurities is you become stronger and more secure yourself. Then she can lean on you, and submit. Relationships work in polarities. If you want her to feel comfortable submitting, you must become more comfortable in leading.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 08:49 AM
1

Everything was beta. You admit you haven't read the sidebar, you just found this sub a few days ago. Most of your posts are criticized for being blue pill. What makes you think you know enough to give advice, if you aren't even sure what are good goals for a good LTR? You don't understand the fundamentals. Trying to learn them by giving blue pill advice and then asking why is it wrong is not adding to the community. Instead, focus on YOUR weakness, and discuss about that. Work on becoming strong…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 08:47 AM
2

This is mostly terrible advice. You are new here, you don't know the basics, you are trying to help, but you are just hamstering to yourself. Don't boss your wife around. She isn't your servant. I suggest that you guys buy a big salad with lots of veggies and low-fat dressing. You can probably get this from your grocery store's salad bar. Blue pill blue pill blue pill. A man leads. He doesn't boss around, he leads. His house is his ship, and he does what he must to keep it running well. The man …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 08:45 AM
1

You have caught the attention of many mods. We know you have good intentions, but you are struggling with fundamentals, and end up giving advice that sounds like out of Athol Kay but it clearly coming from your own blue pill frame. Since you just found MRP a few days ago, we recommend you lay low longer before you start giving advice. Is it realistic to tell him to try to change to Red Pill overnight? Yes. Absolutely. You take the pill, and the world changes. However, once the world changes, you…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 08:32 AM
1

Please, lurke more before giving advice. I understand you have good intentions, but you are phrasing things in a beta way. "improve the emotional connection" is a beta way of thinking. What matter is actions, and by being a strong man, your wife will feel your strength, and connect emotionally to that. But you don't go trying to connect to her, that is beta bucks.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 08:27 AM
2

Each man must create their own path from their own vision. From that, they will understand this takes times and hard work, and it is from the time and hard work that frame comes.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 08:26 AM
1

I'm bummed out, but i'm proud that i decided to do the smart thing, and work around the injury. Also, it might be a good time to cut weight for a bit anyway, so I'll try to make the best out of the situation.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 08:06 AM
1

I deleted the post. This user has posted two posts here, both totally blue pill minded generic question. It is just hamster talking, instead of him owning his shit. He wants to live his life by consensus, instead of examining it himself. He has good intentions, but we should discourage this kind of low quality effort. It is just a way to not do the hard work himself to come up with his own answers.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 07:56 AM
1

You can't change others. Stop this blue pill bullshit. Change yourself. I'm going to delete this post as it is very low effort, with vague questions that are only about you hamstering away from looking at yourself and improving yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 07:53 AM
1

This isn't advice you are asking. You are asking vague questions unrelated to anything concrete about your situation. The only person that can figure this shit out is YOU. YOU need to decide if you enjoy your marriage. If not, think of what YOU can change in yourself to improve it. And when you are done, if you are unhappy, leave. What would you change about your marriage and your wife to improve your marriage? THis is the most blue pill question ever. You change yourself. Period. That is all. Y…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 07:52 AM
3

You managed it very well given the information you had at hand. You can't count on others acting intelligently, or even sharing relevant info. You must act with what you know at hand, and you did, and you made the right choices. Given that, you saw a phenomenon i think of as Crowd Inertia. This is a very established known sociological phenomena. Essentially, people are so disconnected from danger or violence now a days, that when they see, it, instead of acting on it, they look for others for so…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 07:47 AM
3

I got injured in martial arts and stopped lifting for couple of weeks following the doctor's advice. I tried again today, but some exercises still hurt me. I was going to stop the workout all together, and wasted 10 minutes thinking about it. In the end, I decide to train around the injury. I did the other exercises that don't hurt, and modified a bit the ones that hurt (to isolate muscles at least). I'm bummed out I still haven't recovered, but I'm going to accept that i'm injured, and just dea…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 07:28 AM
1

Have you read anything from the sidebar? Lurk more.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 07:19 AM
1

I'm going to point out that you are talking and complaining essentially how your wife is hot. Wtf? Why complain about it? Own it and Command Respect. Lurke more, read more. What have you read so far from the sidebar?
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 07:03 AM
1

Focus on finding your vision. Work on your frame indepent of others.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 07:40 PM
1

Stop focusing on finding the perfect girl. This only gives you a scarcity mentality, which is beta. Put all your energies on becoming a good man with a clear vision in your life independent of others. Only then you will attract high quality people. What have you read from our sidebar?
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 07:11 PM
1

I don't think she has posted to RPW. This is a new account, something doesn't smell right here.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 01:54 PM
2

This account is very new. And you haven't reach out to RPW with it. I smell troll.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 01:54 PM
7

Fantastic post. Great original contribution to explain the theory behind comfort test.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 01:42 PM
3

Or just focus on the crying, and not bring it up. Wait for her to bring it up, if she wants to. Asking "Why" might feed her hamster anyway. Also, it might be a trap, because she hasn't officially spelled out the reason, and by you assuming the reason, in the eyes of her hamster, you are assuming responsibility too. Sometimes they cry so you ask Why and then they use that question to attack you (for not knowing or not caring). It is the same with little children. Sometimes they are crying, and if…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 11:52 AM
1

I first have to ask why she is crying right? My wife does this crying before my work trip thing always, especially if she has a cold or something. I never ask why is she crying, it doesn't matter. Asking why is she crying is just engaging her hamster. You can provide comfort and if she wants to talk, she will. THe more comfort you provide before saying anything about "the why", the more you break her manipulation.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 07:50 AM
1

Prioritize according to your vision, and don't bitch. I did this while in gradschool, and got my fair share of good quality pussy. I loved gradschool, as you are older and more experienced, yet still have access to the young college girls. Being busy with your degree is excellent dread anyway. Stop the excuses, stick to your priorities, and make compromises. To me, this post sounds like you are beta, don't believe AWALT, and you have tons of excuses for your own behavior. Own Your Shit, read mor…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 07:45 AM
2

What questions should I ask her? THis is the wrong way to think about this. Talking talking talking is beta. You won't get the truth nor important information from this. Actions is what matter. Don't go to a date thinking of LTR. Go to the date to have fun. If you have fun, well, go out again. Keep doing this, and eventually, if she is a good woman and she acts (not talks) in ways to demonstrate she values you as a man, well, then you start thinking LTR. How can I determine whether she is lookin…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 07:39 AM
3

high smv is questionable depending on age. Anything 30+, mediocre at best. Remember, their competition is 20 year old college girls. This is a good reminder to all of us to take out the blinders from oneitis. It doesn't matter her SMV for her age. Her age IS part of the SMV, so that hits her. We went to the park with son, and a college-age high SMV babysitter that was keeping an eye on some siblings as I played with my son. Well, she was supposed to, but she kept making eye contact, and finally,…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 07:34 AM
7

the tears are a blatant attempt at manipulation: So the tears are the means to get you to cancel the trip, with the implication being: She is sad, therefore you should feel guilty and do what she wants. As long as you don't cancel the trip or DEER abouit it, you aren't giving in. The trick to teach her is to separate the tears from the the issue about the trip. You understand she is sad. You manage that however you want, some sort of Oak Move, strong alpha, with some minor comfort is the normal …
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/15 07:06 AM
1

100 signs of a cheating spouse This video is the one you mean. Warning, it is just a robotic voice reading a list, irritating, but you can just pause it and read the list from the video.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/15 12:46 PM
2

I wish i could upvote this more.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/15 08:45 AM
3

/u/jacktenofhearts explained it very well when he said: Your frame is "my family has a health risk and it should and will be evaluated by medical professionals." You shouldn't have to worry about whether you convinced her using guilt and anxiety, because this isn't a subject that requires convincing. When someone in your family needs medical evaluation, you make sure they get it. End of story. The captain is in charge of the well being of his crew because it is important for running a tight ship…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/15 08:44 AM
2

Excellent post. I encourage everyone to participate in the Own Your Shit weekly post as they are a great place for us to confront the lies we tell ourselves, as that is the way to overcome them.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/15 06:47 AM
2

The obstacle is the way.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 07:28 PM
3

Wife has some problems she needs to address, and I followed the stupid blue-pill advice of the professionals to just kiss her ass for a bit with the hope that she can be nudged to get the help she needs. I made a knowing decision to act totally blue pill for a few days. It was worse than a relapse: it was my rational choice. We have both been traveling a lot, so we haven't interacted much. But even then, being a nice guy now tastes like shit. I thought it would be "easy" to get back into that ol…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 12:44 PM
2

We've had the talk, repeatedly, but nothing changes. So clearly talking with her isn't doing anything. You need to take responsibility over the finances and take action. This will piss her off, but it is the only way.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 12:18 PM
3

I feel its a shit that needs owning. This post is all about you trying to Own Her Shit, or you trying to make her Own Her Own Shit. This mindset is working from her frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 12:15 PM
1

Great comment, you should write one whole thing about domestic violence against men, and how nobody will help you, and what can we do. One thing to note is that even something like the Basket Hold can still bruise some woman, and the bruises look like you restrained her against her will (which is what you are doing). Just because it is done in self defense, and with care to not hurt her, legally, it can still hurt you.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 09:05 AM
1

Have strong boundaries, and let her face the consequences of her actions. Don't use logic. The rest of the stuff is just emotional manipulation (AWALT) to see if she can make you take responsibility for her mistakes. Don't brow beat, don't rub it in, don't tell her it is her own fault. She knows it even if she won't admit it. Trying to convince her of it is operating in her frame, because all she has to do is to deny it is her fault or accuse you for it to gain power in the dynamics. Talk less, …
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/15 07:01 AM
13

I just go out with my son and do activities with him. Father-son stuff. Other times it is just for me. The key is that she feels like you aren't orbitting HER, that you have a lot of valuable stuff going in your life. This stuff might be being the best father in the world, or working to look handsome such that others notice you. Mix and match with the dread. Sometimes with kids, something by yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/15 11:40 AM
1

You should do an extended post on this subject. Or even a series. You have a unique expertise on this that can help many men.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 07:45 PM
1

Better times ahead. I'm shaking my head here. Prepare for worse times ahead. And plan how you will stand up for yourself. I didn't do it, I was too blue pill, and now, i'm still paying the consequences.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 08:53 AM
1

I am going to be more diligent about the food I consume and not have a similar slip the next time I go out with friends. I find that the way to make myself do these changes is to make very concrete demands with milestones. Instead of saying "i'll be more careful with my diet", which is so vague it is too easy to break while rationalizing, say "I'll eat less than X number of calories every day for the next 4 weeks" or something like that. The more concrete you make it, the more accountable you ar…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 08:50 AM
1

I'm a silly person ... I'm not always in control of myself. Instead of putting excuses, OWN IT. It is ok to be a silly person. It is ok for you to find healthy strong ways to manage your anxiety. You don't need to excuse them, you just need to be clear this is what is good for you, so you do it, period. Own It. Many here are very silly, and silly can be a very strong Frame if you own it (this is usually called "cocky funny", work towards that). My wife doesn't look up to me. THe problem isn't he…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 08:46 AM
2

What ages are the daughters? Frankly, what matters isn't what TRP thinks, but how the activity fits YOUR vision. If you think it does, and you and your kids will have fun, go for it.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 07:42 AM
2

I have a feeling no matter how many warnings you put people will keep doing this. I have an explanation for this phenomenon from my Elements of Frame picture. Maybe I need to get to that soon.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/05/15 11:44 AM
3

The man just took a dive on his SMV with his professional stuff. Of course his woman would be less enthusiastic in sex. AWALT. It isn't their fault they do that, that is their nature. Instead of him accepting it, and working from that, instead, he went to ultimatum thinking that would change her nature and create attraction. Instead, it does the opposite.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/15 02:27 PM
5

part of your SMV is your career and finances. You need to read more, this is all basic stuff. It isn't what you think your SMV is now. She is was used to it, and it just dropped. If you want a renegotiation in terms, this way you did it, you are doing it from weakness. You have to ramp everything up instead slowly in your SMV. You have to work hard on that to hint you might leave. And you didn't do it. You just got insecure at your career, and then decided to go nuclear thinking somehow that wou…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/15 01:12 PM
7

The classic mistake of guy just going to Dread Level 10 right away and it blowing up. I feel BPP needs to put even more warnings in his post, because we have had so many posts recently of men making this mistake. You can't negotiate attraction. I am at a very low point in my life , between my business struggling and now my wife showing little interest in me sexually - its a tough spot to be in. With my position of weakness maybe it was foolish to elevate the threat level but personally I am tire…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/15 12:37 PM
1

You don't guide her, you lead. Leading has nothing to do with her, and all with you. Here is what I wrote about how to lead strong woman that don't want to be lead.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/15 08:02 AM
1

Did you ask in the suicide line for help for low income and such? There are short term cheap stuff in most cities. There are usually wait lists. Even then, have you made a plan to get the money to pay for it. If you haven't made a plan, it just means you are choosing to not work on your frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/04/15 05:03 PM
1

Have you taken steps to see a professional about your depression and suicidal ideas, or are you still ignoring this issue? As it has happened already to you, that stuff just doesn't disappear, it comes to bite you again in the hardest circumstances when is crucial you keep frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/04/15 02:56 PM
3

Dread is for increasing sex, not for getting her to mop the floors.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/04/15 01:07 PM
1

Great stuff. This is stuff I enjoy with Mrs. Autokrator, and i was looking into expanding into new fun directions.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/15 07:34 PM
1

It is ok to criticize him and his opinion, but it isn't acceptable to justify or encourage doxing behavior here. I'm going to delete your comment.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/15 01:09 PM
2

my situation is different We got another candidate for Hamster Award of 2015. Your post is the classic blue pill guy that finds TRP, doesn't do anything concrete, and then gets angry, thinks anger is Frame (which it isn't), and thinks he is the shit, while in reality, he is still being beta playing from her frame. We have seen posts like this sooo many times here. Put your head down. Read more. Lift, lurk more, work on your frame. You are just in the anger stage, and anger feels empowering, but …
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/15 07:13 AM
2

Don't discuss this shit through txts. It only feeds her hamster.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/15 06:08 PM
2

Without this foundation you will fail. Every week we get a post of someone saying they went nuclear, or went too far too quickly, and they don't know what to do. I hope they read this excellent comment and don't make this mistake.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/15 11:02 AM
1

There is a very good discussion about posture in this TRP post.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/15 11:01 AM
3

Once you have Frame, you don't care about labeling. Right now, this post just reeks of Oneitis, with some hamster sprinkled it. This suggests you haven't unpluggled. If you reconcile, you will not do it from alpha strength, but from beta weakness. I still have about 30lbs. to lose, but I swear that is the only thing stopping the reconciliation right now. The way i can tell you are beta is that you are focusing on what SHE wants, what you think is on the way of you becoming what she wants you to …
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/15 08:15 AM
1

I would love to read this.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/15 02:57 PM
1

I think of it as two dimensions. Oak Moves, for example, are both alpha and beta at the same time.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/15 11:55 AM
1

I never ever followed fashion magazines. I thought it was a metrosexual thing. Heck, even in the airplane, when they have the magazine with all sorts of advertisement, I never really even saw them. However, once I started self improvement, I started to pay attention. And it isn't that much work. I saw a jacket that looked cool on some advertisement on a model sort of my age and style, then looked it up online, it was too expensive for me. But, after more googling, I understand what type of jacke…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 07:24 PM
2

Good point! I will dedicate a lot of words to this under Emotional Basis soon, I promise. And then, I'll explain the relationship between the different elements, which is precisely what you are suggesting.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 03:13 PM
1

Good point, Eyes and facial expressions are such an important part that they should be separate from body language. I also agree that being true to your sexual desire is the way to communicate from it, and women respond very well to this.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 02:56 PM
3

This is definitely one of the places where fake-it-till-you-make-it can work. Later in the series I'll discuss confidence, and how it relies on the other basis. It will take me a while to get there, as I need to mention all the basis, vision, and their interrelationship. If you have good posture and such, but still don't have the emotional strength to be confident, yes, fake the emotional basis. But you can't fake the posture, you can only adopt the posture. And with practice, it gets better and…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 01:41 PM
1

Thanks for understanding. We have to update the guidelines to make this more clear, but meanwhile, we are hoping users like you are understanding.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 07:29 AM
3

I want to reiterate the same message I say over and over and over to you, in every post and private message, yet you always worm out and ignore. The problem isn't the exact details of how to respond. That is minor stuff. The problem is your frame is very fragile due to your own admitted psychological problems, major abuse and self harm. Here at MRP we are very concerned about you because we worry that instead of facing that problem first, you are spinning your wheels by ignoring it and thinking …
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 07:28 AM
1

This is a low quality post, and I'll have to delete it. The sub is growing very fast, so we are starting to become more strict in these things. This is just a superficial and vague question. Your question can be answered simply by looking at the Beginners Guide in the sidebar. There you will see that there are common scenarios that are not so much focused on lack of sex. In MRP, we believe that a happy marriage is one You lead with your strong Frame for your vision of a happy life. This leads to…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 07:11 AM
2

Thanks for understanding. The sub is growing fast and we are trying to use this to increase the quality, so we are slowly becoming more demanding.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 06:59 PM
2

When my wife does this, i state the problem (without judging her) and then ask her "what are you going to do about it?" To change the conversation to the real issue and how she is responsible for it. If she says she doesn't know, instead of fixing ot for her, i ask her to think about it and let me know later. I learned this from a book on parenting, it works.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 12:47 PM
3

Essentially, you came here, haven't done ANYTHING, think there are some sort of cliffnotes to fix up your whole life and marriage, and are asking for it. Lurk more. Take your time. Participate in the weekly Own Your Shit threads. Slow down. There are no shortcuts to fix your life, no quick fixes, pretending there are is lying to yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 12:13 PM
1

This guy is the classic one that finds TRP, and all that old bottled up resentment stuff just explodes. Instead of doing the self improvement, because the red pill is for himself, he thinks TRP justifies his resentment because she isn't giving him what he wants. It is acting like a angry teenager.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 12:10 PM
2

Men communicate with actions.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 08:50 AM
1

I recommend in future posts, instead of deep linking to TRP, you write something in the post itself discussing how it applies to Married Sexual Strategy. Everyone here should be reading TRP anyway. I see you sort of did it here, but it is better if you do it in the post itself, refering directly to what you are linking for discussion. Add value to the post by discussing it in the post itself. Otherwise, in the future, it will considered low quality. I'm not going to delete it for now, as I need …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 08:45 AM
3

I showed a little bit of progress on stuff, she was like 'meh, big deal' we can hire someone. Now that the cabinets are 90% finished, she's really excited. She wants me to redo the bathroom ones. I think if I understand it right, Briffault's Law in effect here. This is too common. We can't show our wives our work expecting possitive reinforcement. THey will use it as an opportunity to attact our frame. This is because to them, it sounds like "mommy mommy, look what i did", so shit testing is the…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 08:42 AM
1

This is a very low quality post, so I will have to delete it. There is no context, the title is too generic and unspecific. It seems also the OP needs to read more stuff in the sidebar and lurk around more. Review WISNIFG, it will help you with this in general.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 08:35 AM
1

You are suppose to do this a bit at time, from what you are reading. Not retroactively claim you did it. You need to be passing shit test consistently, maintaning frame, all that. Claiming to just jump to 10 right away is know as a victim puke from NMMNG. This is the weakest thing men do when they find the pill, and it is not alpha, it is just beta resentment, and although you might feel right about it, it is just a way of puking the pill. You are just blue pill, hamstering why you don't have to…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 05:17 AM
3

This stuff you wrote here is the best example of blue pill Mr. Nice Guy covert contract unattractive behavior I've ever read in this subreddit. You feel SO entitled to it, it only makes you more unattractive to her. You are making things worse. There is no way to hurry this. Things will take months. Chill out. Read more. Lurk more. This mistake you are making by trying to hurry things up and looking for a quick thing is very common, and everyone regrets it later because they realize it just made…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 05:14 AM
1

I just realized now I'm writing a post about physical frame, and you mentined it was interesting, yet 5 months ago i didn't know anything about my own physical frame, nor how to improve it, and i posted this question here. Thanks for helping me out on this. It was so easy to improve once i had the right resources and put the time on it, and it has made SUCH a difference in my life.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 07:23 PM
1

best results are focusing on your weak points and probably 95% of guys today need to focus on increasing their emotional control and stoicism more than anything else. I agree with this, in which case, Stoicism tactics are very useful for people unplugging. Stoicism shares a lot of similarity with Buddhism, especially on some of the "acceptance" ideas, which are the key part to complete the transition. Every guy in their anger face could use a little bit of Stoicism or Buddhism.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 07:12 PM
2

That is my favorite pun ever in MRP.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 07:09 PM
1

This is called a Victim Puke.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 07:06 PM
1

They did these psychological experiments giving people adrenaline and then exposing them to a somewhat intense situation (essentially, an asshole would come in being aggressive and dickish to the subject). They were designed such that the adrenaline dominated everything else they could feel, so it was only about how they labeled it. They gave slightly different information to the participants, so from that, they would interpret the intense situation differently. Those that weren't primed, descri…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 06:59 PM
1

A Stoic would say that it is ok to accept that you enjoy caviar more than porrige. There is nothing wrong with that. But do try to accept caviar as caviar, and porridge as porridge, and if someone serves you caviar, enjoy it for what it is, and if someone serves porrige, also enjoy it, but don't waste emotional energy frustrated for what it is not. Accept reality as much as possible, and from that, live virtuously.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 06:51 PM
1

Yes, back in the day, philosophies had three main parts: Physics, Epistemology, and Ethics. The physics is all outdate for both, and the Epistemology is, well, as masturbatory as epistemology gets. Ethics is the only part that is about a guide of living. And between the S and the E, there isn't THAT much difference in the tools they suggest to live a good life. Sometimes the difference is saying A is more important than B, and the other says B is more important than A, but they both agree that A…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 02:01 PM
2

I don't see the distinction you draw. Epictetus, a Stoic, said "Man is disturbed not by things, but by the views he takes of them." This nugget can be used both "pursue your goals" or to "set reasonable goals that will make you happy". Also, the Stoics do spend a lot of time discussing virtue, which is what are good goals. The Epicureans on the converse also spend a lot of energy discussing how to best act as well. I'm not saying that there is no difference between them, plenty has been written …
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 01:48 PM
2

Also, although back in the day, the Epicureans and the Stoics were competing schools, as often happens, some of their techniques overlap a lot. Although they would act as if they didn't have anything relations, always blaming the other that they are doing it all wrong, or that they stole it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 12:44 PM
2

I like this post very much, but completely disagree with the implied dichotomy that you either are stoic, or cocky-funny, but not both. In Stoicism, we choose how we interpret the way the world affects us, and in doing that, we have a lot of power. Stoics would say that acting as if we didn't have that power is contrary to our nature, and prevent us from being virtuous. When we decide how to interpret the world around us, there are many ways. People confuse Stoic (capital letter, the philosophy)…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/15 09:53 AM
3

As soon as I asked him to join this sub, he told us he was married, and red pill as it gets. I thought he was a stoic kind of bot, but apparently, he is very cocky-funny.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 01:43 PM
6

That seems at odds with the idea that one should confront a wife Read about the stages of Dread. It explains how to increase dread until you reach that point of confrontation. You use many tools to communicate this, first simple silent dread, and the hamster tells her that, but you can increase the dread more overtly, flirting with other women, etc. Keep going up, and you get to the point you are clear you have done everything you can, and are ready to walk out. It takes time to build this up. J…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 11:00 AM
1

As to the original question... Why don't MRP get a link ? I think typical Reddit bruised ego's and dominance games... This, plus some stupid drama from the mods there from a long time ago. There is nothing we can do now about this, except keep growing the sub, such that its quality speaks for itself.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 09:35 AM
14

Short version: TRP mods don't like this subreddit. They think we are in favor of telling people to get married, when we are not. We are here only for those that are married or in LTRs and take the red pill.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/15 07:34 AM
3

Keep up the challenging contributions. That is what makes us think. I don't think like you at all, but all your posts force me to think in new ways. That is what I want from this sub.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 08:04 PM
3

This.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 07:58 PM
3

I took a vacation and although I had some fitness plan to carry through it, I didn't do it very well. I achieved some goals, but not others. It wasn't lack of time, I really had no excuse. I was just lazy, and decided to lay down in the sun and read, instead of just putting the 30mins i should have into the vacation routine. I missed many workouts. Instead of restarting my normal workout routine as soon as I got back, I just hamstered that I was tired from the long flights, and postponed. And th…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 10:10 AM
1

The problem I have with the MRP is most of the topics are ex bluepill men asking help with simple problems that are fixed easily reading the side bar. I agree. It has too much of "AskTRP" stuff in the mix. At first it was ok, but the sub has grown a lot lately, and there is simply too many bad posts that all you need is "read the sidebar". As the sub grows, we will increase the moderation, delete more, etc to keep things focused.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 10:02 AM
1

And keep adding to the discussions. My "diagram" isn't supposed to be the ultimate theory of frame. But I do hope it makes people think in new ways, so as a community we all learn stuff about frame. In the end, what matters is that each of us has a way to understand our own frame and make it better.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 09:45 AM
3

Essentially, we lowered our vision, hoping that somehow that would placate her. Maybe if our vision is very low, or pyramid will be almost flat, and she won't find how to push it and topple it. And quickly, she was just stepping it on. I intended to expand this more in a future post about how the pyramid changes, and the different structural issues it can have.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 09:39 AM
2

This is a very good point. I had never thought why TRP didn't discuss frame in more detail, but you nailed it. It is because it is easier to Next, so there is less pressure for a strong frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 09:22 AM
1

Yes, we have somewhat similar elements, although organized differently. As I go into more details of what I mean by all, and their interactions, keep your own perspective in mind, and lets discuss more. I'm not saying my structure is the only structure there can be. What matters is more that each of us constructs a structure that is strong for them, gets them what they want, but also, that allows them to independently judge what they need to improve on. In fact, my picture is an irrelevant abstr…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 08:42 AM
3

Why is your goal her feelings ? What makes you think you can control those? Why is your priority her feelings instead of yours? What is a feeling that is important for YOU? How do you express it currently? How does that help or hurt you getting what you want? Your answers to these questions are more important than any example I can give. Review NMMNG about these issues. She won't love you while your focus on the wrong stuff. It seems contradictory, but she won't love you while you put her emotio…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 06:52 AM
1

In this model shit tests are from outside, her way of testing the stability of the frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 04:48 AM
1

That is where vision will come in. More on this later.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/15 04:46 AM
1

I agree with you that emotions are very important in relationships. I see the emotional basis not as trying to tie emotions, but as accepting then and operating rationally from and with them towards your vision. If your problem is getting emotional when wife shit tests, then a dash of stoicism will help. However, on the other hand, it is important to see a glimpse of the lion as well, to keep her excited. The key is that this variety of response must follow and contribution to your vision. Both …
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 08:21 PM
1

Thanks. I'll refer to it when I discuss the relationship between Intellectual and Emotional parts of the frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 06:59 PM
2

Mindfulness is indeed one of my suggestions. I hope you contribute there as well to help me flesh this out.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 06:38 PM
2

I fully agree. This series of post will focus on those to other legs, and what worked for me. Hopefully the discussion can lead to future guides on the subject.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 06:37 PM
1

Can you link to the post where you mentioned the assertiveness triangle? Or write it again in a future post? I found it very helpful and it informed my view, and i would like to refer to it.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 06:36 PM
1

Thanks for your feedback. I will incorporate this suggestion in a future post.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 06:29 PM
1

Shit tests are a FEATURE. They are the way she understands you are strong. As you get strong, she tests because she wants to internalize it. That is the way they get it. If your wife ever stops shit testing, that is a big big warning that she has already checked out and branch swinged.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 05:26 PM
1

Your assessment sounds correct. If she seems to invite a joke, then you handled it well by understanding that. Always pass shit test with the least effort as possible, as that in itself is form of amused mastery.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 05:18 PM
6

It is just a shit test. She is trying to see if she can get him angry or jealous by making teenage statements. He responded well because he didn't get into her frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 05:05 PM
1

Your question is THE question. As i go into details i will make suggestions in different areas but i look forward to your thoughts on this.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 05:01 PM
1

Precisely. This is an excellent example of a case where your intellectual basis and your emotional basis come together under your vision. Instead of engaging emotionally, your vision tells your intellect "remind emotions to keep cool now, it is better that way". Alternatively, sometimes, the best way to communicate to your wife she is out of line is NOT with logic and words, but with the right display of emotions. Controlled, because controlled emotions are very powerful, hinting only at the raw…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 02:46 PM
2

Women are like that always through out history. The only thing that has changed is that we as men stopped understanding this because we believe that we are all equal. It is a bitter pill, but once you swallow it, there will be a point you will stop feeling angry and frustrated by who she is, and will accept her for who she is, and work from there. There is a certain buddhist simplicity once you stop trying to make her change and accept her.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 02:18 PM
1

As I go into more details of some of the elements, we can discuss this in more detail, is very helpful for me.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 02:04 PM
1

I used to think similarly about frame, because my main weakness was i would get emotional in the arguments. However, a key thing that helped me a lot was to improve my physical frame. Better posture, just look better. It all REALLY helps when i feel strong emotions in reaction to her shit. I stand strong in my physical frame, and immediately, i feel stronger emotionally, and more clear intellectually. And she sees this, and it reaches her in a deep deep instinctual way, better than any words i c…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 01:34 PM
1

Work on everything because you need everything when you do anything. Precisely. I hope as I explore different aspect of this in the series, we can expand on this discussion as a community. My goal is that when newbies read "Maintain Frame", they can read the discussions, and understand what is that they need to work on to be able to do it. I can catalogue a lot of common issues in marriage as issues with the elements of frame. Similarly, i think of a lot of behavior of my wife, and she is just t…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 01:13 PM
3

I understand where you are coming from. Just keep in mind that those things are training wheels. Men come to TRP because they are weak and care way too much about what women think of them, so they lack assertiveness and confidence. Those are just exercises to get them out of it. For example, there is negging, and there is being an asshole. Negging requires to have enough social awareness to be playful, otherwise, it does back fire just as you say. It is very hard to do, and i agree many people t…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 01:09 PM
2

I started a series to discuss the different aspects, including the physical. Read here, more to come soon. I'm getting ahead of myself, but I will expand on the idea that physical is the most concrete and straightforwards ways to improve frame. Each basis of frame affects the other, and can help them or hurt them. They are all important. However, as a beginner, when you start to understand how much you need to change, it can be overwhelming and disorderly. Working on your physical frame is ALWAY…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 12:58 PM
2

I really liked your post on fitness and confidence, and planned to mention it when i start to discuss how each basis affects the others and vision as an example. My idea is that to have a high vision, you need a stable pyramid, with a broad basis. The most efficient way is to work on all areas at once. However, working more on one basis still helps a lot with stability. Since Physical Frame is so concrete and easy to measure, when in doubt, work out!
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 12:51 PM
1

As the leader of the house, you need to work harder than anyone else, and you must have vision. Chores are stuff that are assigned to you, so don't think of them as such. Think of it as stuff that contributes to your vision. Delegate to her what makes sense, and reward her good work. NEVER bitch that you work more, that is how a teen acts when given chores. These chores don't come from HER judgement or your fear of her feelings, but frmo your vision of how you want your household.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 12:29 PM
13

Which red pill principle it goes against? Emotions are VERY important in relationships. In fact, women don't love you, they love how you make them feel. So effectively communicating your emotions is essential to keep them excited and happy. If you don't, they think you are boring. There is a difference between expressing your emotions and vomiting them. In one, you are true to the emotions, express them, and use them to get what you want. This is alpha. An example is that you are angry, but inst…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 11:59 AM
2

A lot of the criticism is that they don't understand this is a process. It is a problem of judging BEFORE understanding. When someone does this, trying to explain things to them so they understand is hopeless, because they are only interested in validating their judgement, not in understanding.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 11:46 AM
1

This interplay is something that I will discuss in future posts, but you bring are already ahead of my writing. I agree with you that sometimes when one basis is weak, the whole thing collapses. For example, there the intellectual basis being weak made the emotional basis weak as well, it dragged it down with it. This is hard to fix and unravel at first because it is hard to separate the issues well, so we don't act well on improving the basis. I also agree with you only reading is not enough to…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 11:44 AM
2

Quite frankly, the only difference between taking the red pill or not is in the intellectual basis. I would argue that TRP is a very efficient and focused intellectual basis to increase quality and quantity of sex. However, i do understand the assumptions of it are stuff many people don't like. I'm fine with that as well, whatever makes you happy. However, many hate TRP only because all they see is too much discussion of a few aspects of those assumptions online, because that is the what the for…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 11:17 AM
1

As I add more stuff in future posts, do discuss your specific experiences, and how they agree or disagree with my proposed structure. That can lead to discussions that help me clarify my own ideas, and improve them.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 11:10 AM
3

Fake it till you make it is a way to tentatively put the three legs of the tripod together. You need a bit of experimentation to get it right, especially if the legs of the tripod are very disparate in length and strength. But it is the way to do it. Once you get something that kind of works, you start to have vision, and boom, your vision helps you improve the basis, and the frame supports you, instead of you working hard to maintain it.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 11:05 AM
1

I agree with these basic principles. If anything, I would go further by saying that when you hedged your principles by saying "most women are", in reality, it is AWALT. They come in different intensities for sure, but all women fundamentally feel first and rationalize to make sense of these feeling. Some women might do this for a short time and then go to logic mode, some might be more entrenched, some might never be unable to leave the emotional picture of reality. But there is something univer…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 11:03 AM
1

Btw, this post nudged me to complete some of my writing on frame. I have posted the first post in the series here. I intend to continue, and some of those post will address this question head on.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 10:15 AM
1

I engaged the hamster stupidly. Wife started her usual bitchy illogical rant she does every vacation. It was sooo obvious to me it was just that. Instead of shutting my mouth and using that predictability to my advantage, I was tired, and a smart ass, and just told her she was doing the same thing she does every vacation. This is true, but it is using logic to try to defeat the hamster. Big mistake. Wife was nut for a couple of days. I was able to maintain frame after that, focusing on not letti…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 10:11 AM
1

I love the art, btw. But this is a post that doesn't discuss Sexual Strategy in marriage, and thus is low quality. I'll have to delete it. However, if you post an insightful post about marriage, including male activities that you do, and how those have helped your frame or light dread, and linked to that, that would be a valuable post.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 08:20 AM
7

Why does this matter? Isn't this a covert contract that since he is 'a nice man' that wouldn't do it, therefore, she most be a woman that doesn't do this? I think it is best to just laugh it off, make fun of it, treat her like the teen girl she is acting as. That makes you rise above her. Fighting back on trying to take it off is operating from the frame where she has the power and you feel hurt by her.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 08:17 AM
12

But flaunting it on social media, that seems disrespectful. Why? A popstar in this scenario is almost as unreal as a person as Disney's Prince Charming in Cinderella. Your wife was acting like a teenage girl, and you handled it VERY well by deflating her bubble with a brilliant neg. Let the hamster do its works, I think your phrase is sinking in how immature her post was, and that is why she is angry. She feels embarrassed. I think that was a measured and great way to handle it. I wouldn't ask h…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 08:16 AM
1

perhaps mom drove him out This empowers the woman too much, in my opinion. If men think this way, they are now owning their shit, and beta. Yes, woman can be a screechtard valkyrie fat whale that closes her legs, and that is not acceptable. However, she doesn't MAKE the man go away. Either she chooses to leave, or the man chooses to leave, or both. No matter which one is it, I agree that society will blame the man for it. But what difference does it make? What matters is that the man chooses to …
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 08:04 AM
3

No. This goes against red pill principles. All you can do is demonstrate with actions how to act. Don't call it the pill or anything. Just bring up small things, for example, her period mood swings with regard to alpha/beta needs and so on. And if the guy likes what you say, he might act more, and trickle down stuff. The more it works, the more he might want to ask more. Once he sees you have figure out something, you can give him more concrete stuff, if he asks only. I have recommended NMMNG an…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 07:11 AM
1

you tell people something they don't want to hear Then don't tell her she is solipsistic. Telling her so is NOT accepting her as a woman, is trying to use logic to change her into a man. This is Blue Pill thinking. The reason why you run into this hamster tactic is NOT because you use big words, but because you try to engage females using logic, as if logic will somehow pierce through the solipsism and stop it. That is blue pull thinking. Accept the solipsism, use it. Don't try to "talk" or "arg…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 07:07 AM
1

"You're/She's being solopsistic again" Why do you want to tell her she is solipsistic? That is engaging her hamster with logic. It only makes stuff worse. You don't use this stuff to point out to her how she is acting like a woman so she changes. You use this stuff to accept her for who she and for changing yourself to respond in the way that gets you what you want. AWALT, accept her.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 07:05 AM
1

Yes, that is a good example of a sub that grew without enforced guidelines.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 07:02 AM
1

There are all GREAT ideas. You might have notice the weekly OWS posts. It was in part to channel some recurrent posts of people just saying they fucked up, so it didn't clog the front page. It seems to be working so far. The other suggestions are great as well, and I'll flesh them out to have more recurrent posts.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 06:48 AM
1

Thanks. This is all very helpful with regards to the guidelines. We monitor closely the growth of the community. We had a mini explosion lately, we are not sure why. Because of this, the number of posts increased, and also the number of low quality posts. We are working on addressing this. And yes, I just noticed that post about pop songs. It is very low quality, and this kind of low quality posts are some that it is very easy to identify and agree that we don't want. We have dealt with it. Expe…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 06:46 AM
1

This is a low effort posts. I am going to delete it.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/15 05:37 AM
1

I'm going to delete this post. It seems you need to lurk and read more before you can post. We have a beginners guide in the sidebar to answer that question.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/15 08:06 PM
1

There are two separate issues. The strength of moderation, and fostering the potential of the community to have quality posts. They are both important, but distinct. You are focusing on the first one, and I'm asking about the second one. The first one is about how to enforce moderation rules. Reddit was originally designed with the idea that upvotes would filter quality, but that has limitations. Mods have a handful of tools to do this (deleting is but one tool, there are others). Remember, that…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/15 07:28 PM
1

I didn't know there were so many fans of Irvine. Maybe we should have a discussion of the book under the MRP lens.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/15 04:28 PM
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