As a younger man who’s a kissless virgin, what’s the point?

matagad · 2021-12-12T01:34:44+00:00

point is to live your life you like you want to live it. dont lie to yourself. if you would like to have a wife and kids then work towards it. red pill is teaching you to be the best version of yourself, and when you are at trying to be better everyday, you will never be an option. get yourself out there, date as much as you can and try, eventually you will get better at dating.

PabloEscalera · 2021-12-12T01:36:27+00:00

Step 1, stop identifying as a kissless virgin. Your self image is skewed and it definitely shows in your body language.

You're probably putting sex, and women by extension, on a pedestal, which is why being a virgin is such a big deal to you

After that just go out more if you want to get laid. Women won't kick your door down to hand you some pussy lmao

TheBigAnon12 · 2021-12-12T03:38:49+00:00

I find myself thinking about this subject a lot, what is the point?

I don't think TRP offers us a point, if anything, this is a place that confirms that women are opportunists and sexually hypergamous... and that's it.

If you do want to draw a point from TRP, it would be that women aren't the point. You get what I'm saying?

Men will get caught up in becoming an Alpha, but lose their soul. They drop everything in hopes of becoming a hyper-sexual human and forget what it's like to actually have a life. Everything is dictated behind *is this alpha or beta?\* and not *is this helpful or retarded?\*

I can confirm this because I once was the guy who always wanted to be seen as fully alpha. I had to display alpha signs 24/7 and I had to make my girlfriends feel like shit. I will say that you will become emotionally destroyed and lack personality until you quit trying to AMOG everyone.

What did help was that I pushed TRP to the back of my mind. I kept all the useful information in the back of my head and just lived my life. I got good grades in school, I talked to lots of people, I set myself a roadmap of where I want to be in 5 years, then 10 years, then 20 years. I have friends, family, and get tons of attention from girls. I just get out there and live. I quit thinking about alpha or beta and just played life by my rules. I'm 10x more successful now then I was when I was trying to impersonate as an alpha.

Maybe this is getting drawn out but to answer your question in *whats the point?*, my answer would be *who cares? There is no point because it's what you decide what it is*. Do whatever you like, if anything just know the consequences of your actions before deciding.

If you're into finance, I'd research business structures, specifically trust funds and s-corps. Making money is easy, but keeping it is the hard part. Good luck man, drop TRP for a month and just live your life regardless of it's beta or alpha.

Woujo · 2021-12-12T04:25:57+00:00

You completely misunderstood TRP. Completely.

TRP is not about choosing between alpha or beta. No man is completely alpha all the time and no man is completely beta all the time. Alpha and beta are mindsets and a mindset and mindsets are combinations of thoughts and emotions.

Most men need to understand and develop the alpha mindset because, generally speaking, the alpha mindset can bring you lots of success in life, especially with women, and the default mode for most men is beta. But there are times when you need to use the beta mindset - if your boss tells you that you need to improve your work or you will get fired, you need to bring out the beta. If your wife gets in a car accident and is in the hospital you may need to exhibit some beta traits.

But TRP is not about becoming some kind of character you read about on the internet. At the end of the day, your rational mind should be in charge and you should do the right thing. The alpha and beta mindsets are just tools you can use. Humans are emotional creatures that often act from instinct, and putting yourself in the right mindset can help you automatically do the right thing.

Guys in successful relationships exhibit a combination of alpha and beta traits, but lean towards alpha and can bring out the alpha whenever needed. AF/BB isnt a law of nature; its just how things normally turn out because so few guys can be alpha for a sustained period of time. You don't have to a BB to have a successful relation.

Aside from that, your post is weak, self-indulgent, and negative. You need to leave TRP and just go live in the real world. Stop reading about women on the internet and actually talk to them.

Nofapdeity · 2021-12-12T01:10:40+00:00

In order to experience anything you have to open up. You will be surprised by the number of lonely women of all ages that are starving to be desired and to be filled up by yoir cock.

Everyday you waist in theory land is a waisted opportunity to experience life pleasures. And with numbers comes independance outcome. Go out there and be bold. You have nothing to loose, only winning pussy.

CommonKoala6 · 2021-12-12T02:56:09+00:00

BBs have families... What families? Family does not mean automatically satisfaction and happy life. I live in a flat block. When I go outside with my dog on a walk I hear TONS of arguments between wifes and husbands. Screaming, insulting, swearing. Literally tons of arguments.

So there goes my question - what kind of family you mean?

There was one guy here who told us his family (wife, and two kids) doesn't show him respect at all. Wife doesn't work, kids spend all day at computer. They're using him. They laugh at him, wife brag about his salary, doesn't cook (doesn't even order a meal for him while ordering for her and kids) doesn't clean.

He's mentally and emotionally CRUSHED. He feels like fucking crap. He's jealous about life of a single bachelor like YOU and me, he wants to make it back.

And there's another important thing - he doesn't know if the kids are his. He didn't make the test. His wife can be a one piece of a slut. I tried to get his attention on this topic but didn't answer.

Family is too risky now to create one. We all have to keep this shit at the distance.

If you still didn't have a gf - that's temporary. You're 21. When you'll get into relationship, watch for red flags and always have passions with MALE friends and make them more important than her. And never tell her your most important secrets. She's not yours, and never will be.

IronAntlers · 2021-12-12T01:29:59+00:00

Don’t be so binary in your thinking dude. Alpha and Beta are placeholder terms for comfort and sexual arousal, not definite archetypes for which everyone is defined. This is an autistic way of looking at the principles of TRP. You’re being a retard. Learn game and develop experience

319Skew · 2021-12-12T02:07:06+00:00

I really hope that this post doesn't get deleted right away.

I'll try to keep this brief because I don't want to write an essay but I'll probably fail.

The first sentence makes zero sense. Unless you've been talking about visiting the forum, there's no 'on/off TRP'. Once you realize that the Emperor's naked. You can't go back to not seeing his junk waving in the wind. So, I'll assume that.

You're learning TRP and masculinity because it sets you up on the natural path.

Men are men and women are women. Society is trying to teach you that you're equal and that the bits and pieces that make you don't "make" you but that's not entirely right because biologically and psychologically, we're not the same.

The end goal isn't to become a CHAD. That's just a symptom of the end goal.

The end goal should be masculinity, freedom, options, strength and mastery.

The result is Chadhood.

What that looks can vary individually but can be easily recognizable. The guy posting under me can think that's being the top of his field. The guy posting above me can want to leave a trail of alpha widows. Both aren't wrong or right. They also will miss a lot if they're no aware of themselves and the environment.

So, you'll need to do more reading, because while chasing ass is part of TRP it's not the sole driving factor anymore than your legs make up your entire body.

You don't have the mindset of an Alpha.

Objectively speaking, Carrot Top is pretty Alpha and red pilled but he wouldn't come to mind as anyone's first pick. Same with Benjamin Franklin.

So, there's that.

Anyway, you're a kiss less virgin because you made that decision and you re-enforced that. You're also very oblivious to female nature since any guy that's been around a lot of women would be, at best cautious about female nature, at worse scornful of them.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not advocating for women to be hated or despised or putting them as horrible. I'm saying that when you've been around women who cheat, lie, play games, manipulate and capacity of solipsism and hamster rationale ... you don't tend to want to rush into a long term monogamous relationship or aspire for one.

Guys here can still get married and have a family, but without the ability to vet, the knowledge of hypergamy and a strong self, you'll end up divorced, emotionally damaged, cucked, cheated on, or destitute.

No, you get into a LTR when you CHOOSE to from the numerous options you have with full awareness of your power and ability to control the situation. It shouldn't be a consequence stemming from desperation.

I have a kid and I love my kid with all my heart. I wouldn't change a single thing if it means that I wouldn't have him in my life, but I can't deny that without having a kid or being married, I haven't limited my options in life.

So, what are you doing to quit holding yourself back? What's stopping you from being more of a man and how are you going to overcome it?

Ethman2k9 · 2021-12-12T06:59:09+00:00

Quit being a depressed fuck. Go out. Meet people. Enjoy your life. Be good to people. Only reference this stuff when you’re having issues. Basically the red pill can be summed up as “don’t be a pussy”. Be good to your woman. Provide for her and take care of her. Remember the men of old. Think of your great grandfather and the kind of life he led. Emulate that. Think of your grandmother. Marry a girl like that. Stop hanging out with whores or you’ll become jaded. Maybe find a girl who lives in the country somewhere. Preferably one who attends religious services regularly because she actually wants to be there. Have a strong enough frame to tell your boss to suck your fucking dick and use those exact words. Command authority and never surrender to anyone yet all the while make sure you are acting with the moral authority to command such power. Be good to your friends, be shrewd to your enemies. And don’t tolerate anything from anyone. Lastly. Be the light unto others that they were not unto you.

Gries88 · 2021-12-12T01:30:26+00:00

Go talk to the guys who were BB and got divorced in their 50s and had to start over... they aren’t winning.

ReturningRPKing · 2021-12-12T01:52:47+00:00

Stop trying to meet a woman in the club lol at least it’s never worked for me. Try and meet one a campus club like church group or a martial arts gym or library. If I were you I’d be more focused on making sure you have a job lined up once you graduate instead of just trying to get pussy.

Crespius66 · 2021-12-12T01:56:06+00:00

think more short term dude,you got a bunch of years ahead of you, reel up a hoe eventually just keep trying

balanced_views · 2021-12-12T04:11:58+00:00

You’re caring too much. DO WHATEVER THE fuck YOU want to do

Rjw12141214 · 2021-12-12T04:54:04+00:00

OP your first problem is you do not understand the red pill from the start. The red pill is not a set of directions. The red pill is a collection of observations which is why it’s related to the red pill from the Matrix. You see the true reality. How you respond to it is up to you. I hate to be mean but if you are really a 21 year old kissless virgin you are doing many things so wrong. You need to lift, eat well, and most importantly READ well. There is so much reading material on how to enact positive change in your life. Any lack of progress is on you and solely on you.

StarchRunner · 2021-12-12T05:26:47+00:00

Grass is always greener dude.

I’m in my 40s and plenty of my married with kids friends hate their lives. HATE IT. And think I’m living the high life. (Sometimes true but I do what I want).

The truth is most of what you envy in family life is rose colored from seeing movies/TV/social media. It’s a lot of sacrifice and ingratitude in reality. They might love their kids but the grind wears them down. And a ton of couples seem to fall out of love and stick together for the kids.

So, who wins? The guy living like they want, regardless of the choice they made. Each choice has a cost though, don’t fool yourself on that. There is no happily ever after into the sunset.

ginteru · 2021-12-12T13:36:10+00:00

There's no winners in dating. Only different lives and experiences.

AF/BB are not people, these are outcomes.

Alpha/beta itself is a dichotomy on how your actions are perceived by the opposite sex. By extension, AF/BB are just the stereotypical outcomes of these actions. Alphas fuck and betas pay the bucks for the same woman.

AF evangelists are pick-up artists who do put pussy on the pedestal. They perceive sex as their main source of validation. Same way BB evangelists (i.e. blue-pilled guys) perceive marriage and kids as the greatest good they can do.

But these aren't the only two choices. You don't have to go one way or the other. You can't pick both, either. You can't fuck hundreds of women and expect to find a loving wife in the end when you're close to 40. That's not how any of this works unless you got the wealth and the looks of Henry Cavill, which I'm 100% sure maybe 0.5% of red-pilled guys have. And even then there's a fuckton of problems dealing with gold diggers at that stage. There's no safe option. There's risks everywhere. You just have to pick what risks you're willing to take.

Losing out on love and sex in your youth will affect your later experience with women, I'm sorry to tell you. But that does not mean there's no point to trying to pursue women. You just have enough time to pass to understand why you specifically want to be with someone or at least bang them.

I can't emphasize this enough. Why exactly do you want to pursue women? You have to dig really deep into some very uncomfortable places in your psyche to uncover the answer to this question, and this answer will be unique only to you because of your unique circumstances, life choices and experiences. No person, no book, no article, nor no video will tell you the answer to this.

You may be disgusted or empowered by this answer, this will be something you will have to deal with yourself.

In my mind, for most regular cases, you're ideally dating and having sex not for validation nor for some sort of self-perceived "right thing to do" to wife up some 30-something career woman, but because you're looking for someone you can enjoy the company of who you are also attracted to.

You might want to have a partner you can trust. And you can have many partners throughout your life. And each one will bring something new to your life depending on what stage if life you are at right now. But this poses the same risks as marrying early or banging your way into old age.

Old age sucks for everyone. And there's few benefits to being old even if you're married. It's just a stage of life where you're just expected to enjoy the last years of your life, but that doesn't necessarily mean that a family will make it better, only that you'll have different experiences compared to someone who chose to not have kids or a family.

And fuck what other PUA types say, but meaningless sex is just as miserable as being completely alone, if not more. Post nut clarity hits you the hardest in these moments. You realize you're no longer with a woman, but with a person, who you might not want to wake up next to in the morning. In a way, you lucked out by being a virgin, because there's always a worse outcome.

Here's what you should be asking instead of asking what's the point to pursuing women (i.e., what's the point of living or having a career or leaving something after you're gone? There's no answer because in essence it's a question that means everything and nothing at once, it's only what meaning you put into it that matters): What kind of person would complement your life? Could it be one person, or would there be many? Do you want to have sex because of the associated pleasure, the bonding, or because you feel better about yourself? Do you want to have and take care of kids? Could you love the person the same way you love yourself? Would you be better off doing something else instead of dating?

What exactly do you want? It's only when you have this baseline when everything else can fall in place with time.

Best of luck.

Styx3791 · 2021-12-12T02:30:09+00:00

At The end of it all you're not going to want to die alone, you're going to want to have kids and grandkids.

The point of dating is to find a good mother for your children, with whom you and your morals are compatible.

Stop just trying to find a good lay. That is just masturbating with someone vagina.

2021-12-12T02:46:16+00:00

Whats the point!???? TO NOT TO BE A FUCKING KISSLESS VIRGIN YOU PUSSY

ThenIJizzedInMyPants · 2021-12-12T05:51:15+00:00

Well your understanding is wrong. AFBB is a description of what happens in the world - dualistic female mating strategy

What YOU should do is build yourself into the best version of yourself. Forget about AFBB. No one is entirely alpha or beta.

If YOU want to get married and have kids, you can do that. Just go into that knowing the risks with your eyes wide open. having a mix of alpha + beta traits is ideal for LTRs.

TRP is about giving you the tools to use to achieve your goals. Not about prescribing what exactly you should do in life

espero · 2021-12-12T06:26:01+00:00

Maybe you should pay a hot prostitute for an hour or two. Just to get those engines started.

itsFRAAAAAAAAANK · 2021-12-12T07:15:21+00:00

Who cares… go lift heavier weights

TopRPd · 2021-12-12T09:04:04+00:00

You been in trp for 5 years?? I guess you were reading the whole time and still missed biggest concept- you gotta do the work boy. And bahahaha at the comment that alpha don’t have kids and die alone- it’s the opposite. You will probably be a cuck, raising an alphas child without even knowing it.

Nuts_unbusted · 2021-12-12T12:46:56+00:00

You need a fucking slap in the face and to stop being such a pussy.

ChristophBerezan · 2021-12-12T13:36:50+00:00

I'm a 45 year-old virgin and I reached the IDGAF phase years ago. Had some bad non-sexual relationships in my 20s that turned me off of dating forever. I don't care how society looks at me. I probably would be considered either a beta or an incel but I call myself a volcel. It was my choice to withdraw from the market.

edjohn88 · 2021-12-12T15:41:41+00:00

No no NO! AF and BB are the two angles that make us valuable to women and we are a ratio of both at any given time. Reddit bros will paint the picture that only AF matters because sex is typically the first thing on our minds and the ahrdest to get. However, the key to happiness is not just how to maximize sex.

AF and BB are value measurements for you to hold up like a lens on your behavior so you can mature in tla way that you end up having an ideal ratio of both in light of your PERSONAL idea of happiness.

sabanMiles11 · 2021-12-12T22:28:22+00:00

No one is saying you can’t get married. They are saying don’t be desperate and marry the first girl that will allow you to insert your penis in her. There is nothing wrong with being in an an LTR if you have options. Would you want to be completely controlled by your employer? If you got fired, would you be able to get a similar job? That is “being alpha” in a sense. Not how many women you can fuck. But having options

sabanMiles11 · 2021-12-13T05:18:33+00:00

Also, you obviously WANT to have sex. It is a goal of yours. So why not achieve that goal? Write down your 3 most important goals. Maybe its 1. Get a girlfriend 2. Get a job/better job/graduate school and 3. get in shape. Now, write out how you will achieve that goal.

For the girlfriend, have you done the following: 1. Downloaded every dating app and created a profile. 2. Take 200 pictures of yourself, take the 20 best ones, put them on photofeeler, and then use the top 3-5 on your profile? 3. Go to a bar and talk to 5 women at least once a week 4. Get a social side job like barbacking/waiting tables/working at a gym 5. Reduce time online on shit sites like reddit (mostly shit.... some of the internet is good, but you need to be disciplined) - You want to reduce time so you will A. become bored and then B. fill that time with better activities like working, socializing, reading, working out or something thats not making you a boring/poor/out of shape human. 6. Join at least 2 social activities like crossfit, yoga, intramurals, anything on meetup etc. 7. Get more friends (no offense, but most virgins lack friends and the major part of their virginity is a lack of social life that they would get through male friends)

Complete steps 1-7, do them for at least 6 months, and I guarantee you will not be a kissless virgin anymore. Your other option is laying in self pity. The choice is yours

frhnwunderkid · 2021-12-12T02:30:45+00:00

Boo fucking hoo. Are you going to fuckin sit on your ass and throw yourself a pity party feeling sorry for yourself wondering 'ohh but what is the point' or do you want something for yourself in life?

If you wanna get laid, there are sure fire ways, to maximise your chances of getting laid. Are you fit? Do you know how to keep eye contact when talking to a woman? Do you know how to keep a conversation going? Do you know how to flirt? Do you know how to show your intentions with plausible deniability? Do you dress well? Do you have hobbies? Are you fucking interesting? . .

or do you expect women to roll over and spread her legs for you?

Go monk mode, work on yourself massively. Lift, eat proper, read, socialise and go out like you're gaining xp in a fuckin video-game. Relentless. Just say shit and you'll get away with it cause you just don't give a fuck and we're all gonna die anyway.

No one, and I mean literally no one fuckin gives a shit about you and that's kinda sad but to me it's almost empowering - I'm to take full responsibility for my lifes outcome.

As for the philosophical aspect of it all. You choose your ending bro. You give your life the meaning. I partly relate to you cause I'm a young guy too, 23 here. Bro trust me, you have your life ahead of you.

The winners are who decide what they want in life for themselves, who go out there and bend reality to their will, what they believe and achieve shit.

Wtfbyamey · 2021-12-12T03:53:13+00:00

I am the same as you bro I am 19, and a kissless virgin

My reason is just slightly different than yours, I have had plenty of chances till now and I am quite sure , once I am 21, and start clubbing I will have dozens of more options(hoes in clubs), but my problem is I find it absolutely disgusting to just randomly kiss a stranger, I need to have atleast some sort of connection priorly,

I KNOW I MIGHT BE SOUNDING GIRLY AND A PUSSY OR WHATEVER ,but whenever I think of kissing a girl I just met and she’s into it, I think that “is she infected”, “where has that mouth been before this”?

And hence I just can’t , girls told me that they only want fwbs , but it sounds good on paper, but when it comes down to it, I get extremely nervous

SufficientRange7769 · 2021-12-12T02:58:06+00:00

I'm 31 and a KHV. I've learned to accept over time that I'm not like everybody else and am just not meant to have sex or relationships. I spend my time focusing on other things. My hobbies, making money, lifting etc.

the-dan-man · 2021-12-12T05:27:43+00:00

Not sure I understand question. Who wins in what? In love?

Pros and cons to everything. Generally, this is the decline of society without God and morals, so nobody is winning really. Depends what you want and value. Go after that. But you'll come across disillusionment and heartbreak anyway. We all do. Men and women. Blame the death of God and breakup of social and family dynamics.

-Ivar-TheBoneless · 2021-12-12T02:29:01+00:00

Well unless you take actions to improve nothing will improve for you. Society doesn't care about you and nobody is coming to save you. So you have to save yourself.

Keep taking action to improve and eventually things will get better. You also sound depressed and defeated. Girls can sense that and won't want to get with you. Keep improving and pretty soon you'll feel like a winner. Then girls will sense that and want to get with you.

As for who wins, it's an alpha that got something going for him. Even high quality betas could do well for themselves if they know what traps to avoid. I don't even think that someone that has taken the red pill can even really be a beta. Because once you know about what a beta bucks is then you don't have to be one.

The one thing you got going for yourself is that you're only 21 and you have the red pill. You have time to go anywhere and do anything. You have enough time to be whatever the Hell you want.

drkinferno72 · 2021-12-12T03:17:38+00:00

Go to a bar, have the milfs come pick you up lol

cluelessguitarist · 2021-12-12T03:31:09+00:00

The point is to get the life you want to live, life is an strategy, good setups and positions will yield good rewards, work to get that position, guys tend to have the shorter side of things when younger but when you reach your early 30s things gets easier in general if you have been consistent on yourself, thats with women, people and business.

thereitgoes33 · 2021-12-12T03:37:52+00:00

Some women will be into you, some won’t. Don’t waste time turning a “no” to a “maybe”. Work with the “maybes”, and pick up on some signals from the “yes”’s.

I very highly doubt all you’ve ever had were “no”’s.

If you have a good social life, lift like a Chad, and care about money as you claim then I doubt every girl you’ve ever encountered has been a no.

Some guys can bag a 10 on a night out in town, that’s cool for them and I respect the skill.

Your problem might be you may not be showing the maybes or yes’s interest, which will put them off. Even if they’re 5’s or 6’s. Women don’t chase, so if they don’t think you’d bang, they’ll move on to someone who will.

Start with getting some 5’s or 6’s. Women you think you’d have “no problem” with. Get some experience under your belt, (no, really, worst thing is bagging an 8-9 and not showing them a good time when it counts so you can plate and spin).

Work your way up from there, because the signals a 5 gives out to let you know they’re interested are the same signals a 9 gives out.

The point (in my most humble of opinions) is to know how to bag that 10 you’ve had your eyes on or WILL set your eyes on.

Maybe you even commit “taboo” and get into a relationship with the 9 or 10 you finally got.

What if things don’t work out and you get heartbroken? Well it’s a good thing you know how to get the next one.

LuciidEnigma · 2021-12-12T03:43:58+00:00

Well its whatever you see as winning. People put value on things they feel are important to them if some fell like a harem is the way to go then that's them if some.want a relationship then that's ok too the question is what do YOU see as winning?

akahige26 · 2021-12-12T04:04:20+00:00

Redpill isn't a binary "be alpha or die". It isn't an ideology of men vs women. Redpill is a toolset. You learn the toolset of when to apply "alpha" (attraction) and when to apply "beta" (comfort). The overwhelming majority of men's issue is that they don't know how to be alpha, which is why the majority of discussion centers around it. Rollo is the godfather of this space, and he's been married 25 years. Many redpill content creators have LTR's. The point is getting so good with women that you're able to actually select for the one's you wish to keep in your life instead of letting the universe select for you, which is 99% of men that actually do get married. Your biggest issue right now is that you're a redpill masturbator. You come into the space to consume the content, maybe apply a low hanging tidbit here and there, then fuck off. My call to you is to commit. Stop half assing only when you feel sad about your love life. Apply the scientific method to yourself, and figure this shit out. You've got a whole community of men that are here to trade notes with you.

Frosty_League · 2021-12-12T04:19:39+00:00

I feel you man

1). Next time you’re in the club/bar do this: spot the most attractive and available girl in there. Walk up to her, look her in the eye, and say “You’re by far the most beautiful woman in here, my friends are over there if y’all want to come join us for a drink or two” then walk away. If you gave her a good impression (ie: you walked and talked with confidence and dgaf whether she rejected you) then she’ll probably join you. It’s simple but it works. Don’t overthink things and have some balls

2). Get on dating apps. Use Hinge if you’re looking for a girlfriend. Make sure you have good pictures

3). Red pill has a nuanced application to the real world. The world isn’t black and white like you seem to think it is. I’ve been a beta guy a lot of my life and I make a lot of money too, but guess what? I’ve still gotten laid a lot even before taking the red pill. Doesn’t exactly fit into the red pill Paradigm, does it? But here I am. You’ll figure things out

alphaonthecomeup · 2021-12-12T04:31:12+00:00

Yo brother. Do some research and go to Thailand. No lie. I’ve been here 14 days and have gone on many adventures. Shit is fire and you will be forced to put yourself out there. Spend some time in hostels, go out. I like the south part (islands) more than Bangkok.

The Thai women are feminine and direct. If they like you, they like you. They view sex different. Just to get some experience so you can see that you aren’t some wack person. Idk where you live but in the West shit is actually kind of toxic.

I don’t know who wins in the end, but all I know is that I don’t want to lose.

ShaiteOnYourChest · 2021-12-12T05:47:25+00:00

I’ve basically come to the conclusion that trp tells us men we can either take 2 paths. The alpha fucks, or the beta bucks.

Not really. It depends on the person what the specific goal is. And problem with advice it's pretty much always general in nature. Meaning a statement of absolution means like 80-90%. A statement of certainty means like 60+%. So it's not "do this or do that". It's understanding the likelihood an action carries. And in some cases your wants and needs are opposite to the general advice. So it's not having an absolute answer but having an understanding to formulate your own solution. And formulating your own solutions is the difficult part as it requires you to put in effort and think.

So for example having a high body count is just a value in itself to some. But for many spinning plates is not a reward in itself but only a pathway to normalizing women so you don't pedestal and oneitis. But regardless of if your preference is holding a plate arrangement or not you might still need it as a tool to get into a situation where you can hold your frame in a relationship because you aren't desperate to hold on.

What about when you’re in your 50s? 60s? BB’s will have a family, children, and grandkids. An AF wouldn’t, and would die alone or get married at a very late age, and not have kids. Sure you’d have experience, but by the time you’re in your mid 30s people don’t act the same as 21 year olds.

I’m a 21 year old kissless virgin, so I am naturally worried I am seen as BB even though I workout and have a masculine frame. I just don’t put myself out there. I’ve also been able to observe relationships and people around me throughout life.

So who actually wins in the long run?

Again it's about what you want. The path isn't the exact same for everyone. What people want isn't the exact same. The tools for achieving the ends tend to pretty similar to a large degree. Like regardless of wanting to never get settled or wanting a christian marriage your success still depends in both extremes of your understanding of what attracts and turns on a woman. Alpha and Beta are generalisations of extreme spectrums. And like anything in life it's a duality where you need both for an LTR. So again understanding the underlying complexity of general and absolute advice.

Another problem here is being so image dependant. Kinda goes hand in hand with beliefs but just to mention it. Your mental point of origin isn't yourself but what someone else might see you as. And reality is at 21 it does feel horrible but say you are 25 and have an ability to engage with women it's not going to matter at that point. So understand where to put your worries. You are the only person who so intimately cares about you being a kissless virgin.

Would I trade places with a 21 year old kissless virgin? Yes obviously. Youth is valuable and there's never been a better time to be a 21 year old kissless virgin with all the access to information from older men who have gone from blue to red. Plenty of time that young to figure it out. 20 years ago gonna be a lot harder to figure it yourself.

General optimum is spend your 20's chasing money first, chasing women second and gaining experience to have a foundation for an LTR that produces a good environment to found a family on.

And understand for a man you are at your sexual prime when you reach 30. Not quite sure by what you mean as being an option at 30. Doesn't work that way for men. Well assuming you've strived and went somewhere.

Ultimately what TRP is just a tool to get the ends you want. Too many make the mistake of chasing someone else's definition of success. If you don't know what you want then that's a foundational problem that you need to seek a solution for. Even if you aren't sure you have to move in some direction. It's better to find out you are on the wrong path than not being on a path at all. When you are on the wrong path you are still getting answers to who you are and what you want.

As far as your problems with self image Rich Cooper explains it well. Your beliefs define you. So because you believe in that something is wrong with you and that you are a kissless virgin that is what you manifest, so insecurity and doubt. If you believed the opposite you would be opposite. There is no set definition of what your being is. You define it by your thought patterns. That is general advice. The complexity comes from actually understanding where the insecurity comes from and then actually putting in the work to change it. Practically meaning therapy. It can be done by "yourself" if you have the right resources but it's just faster to do with someone experienced in working through problems in your personality.

These aren't things that instantly change as they are tied to your personality the path ways in your brain. So even when you understand the principle it takes more time to actually become something else.

Are you going where you want to go or are you just maintaining what is expected of "normal"? Do you have a vision of how you want to spend your time on this earth?

Guys I've found helpful Rollo Tomassi, Wes Wattson, HealthygamerGG and already mentioned Rich Cooper.

velvetunderground111 · 2021-12-12T05:50:37+00:00

I was a pretty boy hipster who partied, drank and dated all through my 20's: life sucks after that. You will never get over it. Especially if you knew a lot of people and got really close to the women in your life. I yearn for that shit. I yearn for those times: 42 now. BUT...the beta bucks guys I see my ex's settling down with later in life appear happy. They go on trips, are buying houses together, I dunno. Me, I am all burned out. So it depends.

Puzzled-Squirrel-803 · 2021-12-12T06:02:56+00:00

Don't fetishize being a virgin and get out there and talk to people like a normal dude

TheBunk_TB · 2021-12-12T07:42:20+00:00

Live a good life for yourself. This is a point worth discussing

kyle_fall · 2021-12-12T08:32:32+00:00

This AF/BB dichotomy is 100% absolutely a lie. How could it not, obviously these things are a gradient more than binary camps. The whole point of TRP should be to integrate these concepts of power/attraction/social dynamics/effective life path(w/e you wanna call it) and use it to build whatever life you want.

I would be absolutely depressed if I was still trying to pick up girls at the club at 50. And I've seen guys do it. I've met 60-year-old guys making jokes about looking for hot 19-year-old girls with daddy issues and it's incredibly sad to me. Using TRP ideas though I don't see why you could travel the world with 3 girlfriends in your 20s though, that seems way better than any traditional guy's dating life I've ever met.

Don't give up, 21 is very young in your journey towards being a fully integrated and seductive man. You're on the right track.

rhunting · 2021-12-12T08:34:17+00:00

Just have fun bro no stress lmao really ain’t hard

The-Wizard-of-Oz- · 2021-12-12T09:48:57+00:00

Better to live a harsh truth, and not the false, but seemingly sweet lie.

Also, if you believe in the lie there's always the risk of getting f**d in the a*

TekatoZikame · 2021-12-12T12:30:04+00:00

OP, the only way to win the game is not to play.

makeadolfgreatagain · 2021-12-12T13:20:53+00:00

TRP is great because it exposes female nature, but it isn't some strict doctrine you have to live your life by.

Stop worrying about what's alpha or beta, and just realize women aren't going to fall into your lap unless you put in some effort. Stop whining online and go meet some chicks. Eventually one you meet is going to want to meet up some more and meet your meat.

madmax77xl · 2021-12-12T13:46:23+00:00

You said you're not a basement dweller twice in the last paragraph. Sounds basement dweller to me. You're just here to justify why you're BB

osirise · 2021-12-12T14:50:31+00:00

Life is to be experienced. Just do it. You're wasting time observing and analyzing.

I do the same thing with projects. I have the urge to research and read everything I can abut them to "get them right"

The answers however. Lie in the process.

18cmOfGreatness · 2021-12-12T15:19:37+00:00

The world isn't black and white. Alpha fux beta bucks is actually not the best sexual strategy for a woman. It's in her best interest to secure alpha because women need resources but they also need protection. So yeah, they want to actually be with alpha not just being his cumdump. But if they can't secure him they'd rather get his genes and trick beta into providing for them. In a way women who follow this code are failures. Most successful guys here on TRP actually have relationships with women, usually dating multiple plates at the same time and treating them depending on how loyal and attractive they are. That's the way to go. You can have a family as a redpilled man, it's just that you need to have all the legal bullshit in check.

largomouth3 · 2021-12-12T16:19:53+00:00

You discovered TRP wayy too young

I discovered it initially in HS too. it will explain a lot but it will depress you too.

Two words: sell drugs

b2daoni · 2021-12-12T18:03:45+00:00

The point?

Purpose over Pussy.

TRP helped me realize the importance of purpose. Purpose will always satisfy. Pussy can only entertain.

Jacke766565 · 2021-12-12T21:08:20+00:00

This post brought up a surprising amount of wholesomeness in the comments, it's the right direction. Also, would be good for more redpillers to address their retirement, staying childless or single it will be really hard to find a social circle in your 50s and later

donaldcargill · 2021-12-12T22:50:43+00:00

From personal experience I have lived in the beta mindset from up in till I was 29. And let me tell you I dated a few girls then and I was walked on and manipulated the whole time but during that time I was playing the nice guy routine. What did this accomplish I became behind on my career goals,( was almost engaged to a girl and did her homework while neglecting mine which caused me too fail out semesters in a row and now having too raise my grades to get in too a college so I may graduate) the point of the alpha mindset is not necessarily to sleep with tons of girls but to be in control of your live and not to throw away your pursuits for a girl. To say alphas don't get married and have kids is quite silly since Rollo tomassi is married and many others are as well including my mentor.

gorilla_blanco · 2021-12-13T04:23:26+00:00

Do you have any brothers/sisters? Hopefully one of them has kids… become an awesome uncle and leave them an inheritance if they hang out with your old ass

codingemotion · 2021-12-13T06:36:26+00:00

If you want sex then you must get a woman to be alone with you. If you manage to do that then your chances of losing your virginity will dramatically increase. So go out and convince women to come to your place. If it's loud then find a way to tell them "I have something important to tell/ask you, can you follow me to a more quiet place?" If you manage to persuade her to come to your place then you're 90% there. Then just loosen her up get her to watch a movie or some other bullshit close to you. Start testing the waters by touching her in nonsexual places. If she likes it then gradually escalate it to become sexual. Before you know it you lost your virginity. If you fail to do any of these things then you need to work on the part you failed. Learn to be more persuasive and make women comfortable around you.

dynospectrum7 · 2021-12-13T07:27:18+00:00

Buddy. Seriously just go pay for it and once it’s over, you’ll see that it’s not everything it’s cracked up to be.

PurPUA · 2021-12-13T13:28:11+00:00

I see it quite often.. The common misconception that the Alpha will be single and fuck around, gets laid and gets out. Where the beta will have a family etc.

The big difference between the alpha and the beta is that the alpha is unattached. He doesn’t need a woman, he is living on his own terms. Where the beta needs a woman to feel/feel like he’s perceived as complete.

Women wise I am doing really well for myself and I don’t need a girlfriend but if I find a girl I genuinely care for/about. I wouldn’t mind settling down. It all comes down to personal preference but the biggest thing is not to be attached to women as if they make you complete. They are an addition, nothing else.

I am not looking for pussy, if it comes it comes. If it doesn’t it doesn’t. Put yourself on the sexual market place and just experience, nothing else. Don’t try to get, just be and enjoy.

DeplorableRay · 2021-12-13T15:05:54+00:00

Maybe you should spend some time browsing MRP. This question is better answered by the men on the other side with experience. You seem to have this pov that it’s with AF or BB, but in truth it’s having both and learning the balance.

bittr_n_swt · 2021-12-13T23:16:45+00:00

I see redpill as a toolbox and I carefully select what I want and what I don’t want.

schwaRarity · 2021-12-14T17:19:54+00:00

When you start having sex you’ll realize how crazy overrated it is. The best sex I ever had is with my current gf. But it doesn’t make a relationship. Chemistry does. Having someone who you can trust, who can trust you- that’s the best part. Having this is billion times better than having pussy.

Nietzschean- · 2021-12-12T05:24:26+00:00

Just stoop kiddo ,stop being a whiney fucking bitch

LetsMakeThisHappen12 · 2021-12-12T10:38:43+00:00

Hey man gonna be honest. Maybe being on trp since you’re 16 is why you’re a kissless virgin.

yaboyebeatz · 2021-12-12T04:32:05+00:00

It’s all confidence bro. You’re not confident as you think you are. Work on your game, don’t worry about trying to smash a dime piece right now, work on lower tier chicks. Accelerate your game with them and work your way up, use them as practice. Maintain the gym and hygiene habits as always. And last but not least, STOP worrying about a woman saying NO to you, there will always be one that says yes.

Title	As a younger man who’s a kissless virgin, what’s the point?
Author	Nofapdeity
Upvotes	118
Comments	147
Date	December 12, 2021 1:06 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/redf8r/as_a_younger_man_whos_a_kissless_virgin_whats_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/as-a-younger-man-whos-a-kissless-virgin-whats-the.1092945 https://theredarchive.com/post/1092945

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