How do I humanise men again?

GoodSilhouette · 2022-08-10T19:07:00+00:00

Do you have any positive male role models in your life?

Any lady or gay male friends in good relationships?

Do you know any average ass men? They're just normal ass people with a mix of good, neutral and bad traits. Some men are amazing and some are God awful.

Stop consuming TRP or FDS content first and foremost, you shouldn't be miserable or dehumanizing around 50% of humanity lol. If you had a bad break up or traumatic experience you should focus on healing you including therapy if you need it.

zapadz · 2022-08-10T19:58:51+00:00

You can try understanding where the men who adopt redpill beliefs are coming from and why it leads to such issues

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPIZWWzJjYE

Other than that, based on this post it seems like your irl experience is different, so just stop looking at redpill stuff and focus on irl reference experiences.

You can also try reading “ Why Men Are the Way They Are”

datacat · 2022-08-10T20:16:13+00:00

I've picked up a technique over the past couple of years that works to challenge generalising thoughts. When I notice a thought that says "that person looks like X, therefore they are Y" I say to myself "Maybe... Maybe they are, maybe they aren't, most likely they have a little of that attribute inside of their character. Whether they indulge it or not, I can't really tell until I get to know them."

Seems to help me. Might take a little time to build the habit. YMMV.

TempNameMofodamn · 2022-08-10T23:47:19+00:00

That's funny because red pill has made me incredibly anxious that women cannot actually tlove and only want sociopathic men or men they can use as an ATM. It's still hard to humanise women for me even though I know it's wrong. I wish I had a friend like you in real life maybe we could help each other get rid of these terrible notions and distrust of the opposite sex.

xvszero · 2022-08-10T23:05:25+00:00

Same advice I have for red pill men... stop indulging in red pill content. It's shit and will only make you unhappy.

Then go out and meet real people and judge them as individuals.

honey-bundy-88 · 2022-08-10T22:57:37+00:00

I’m so glad you shared this because this is a topic that often goes unaddressed when talking about red pill recovery. The RP is really good at reducing humans down to our most simple characteristics. Women are fragile creatures looking to exchange sex for safety and resources. Men are selfish brutes who are easily swayed by their lesser instincts. I admit that after several bad dating experiences of my own (and after spending enough time in red pill spaces) I started to believe that men just weren’t capable of deeper emotions beyond feigning them in the interest of getting sex. What really helped me was discovering the r/deadbedrooms and r/askmen subreddits. Hearing those men describe in detail their yearning for a deeper physical and emotional connection from their partners really opened my eyes. They even described things I’ve felt at times. I recommend you find the same.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2022-08-10T21:26:07+00:00

Only a tiny percent of men are in this redpill rabbit hole. And the vast majority have never even heard of it. Just like a few bad apples don't make racial groups all bad, the same applies to men and women.

Jelly_Crusade · 2022-08-14T22:18:22+00:00

For what its worth, I'm feeling the same from the other side of the aisle. That women don't really feel love for their partners.

I don't know if I can be considered a redpilled man or not, but at the very least, loving a woman for who she is, and being loved for who I am, is all I really want lately. So we are out there. And I'm glad that there are women capable of love out there too, like you.

SilverTango · 2022-08-11T01:09:34+00:00

Highly recommend reading Alison Armstrong's The Queen's Code. It's a little over the top, but it will change your mind about who men are.

PutsWomenOnPedestal · 2022-08-10T20:49:59+00:00

Your opinion of men is correct. No humanization needed, lol.

Radiant_Specific6542 · 2022-08-10T20:29:25+00:00

Seeing how there's a large chunk of the male population who are virgins, the majority of men aren't even capable of addin you or any woman to their pokemon collection.

That being said, you should step back and reflect on your dating choices and what alterations you can make.

At the end of the day, regardless of what media you consume that poisons your brain from RP to Feminism; the majority of men are givers, providers, and would fighy & die for you and most certainly aren't trying to oppress or demean women.

If you want a higher caliber guy that checks off the generic boxes women typically go for, then yes, you're definitely sharing that guy.

If you go for Joe the plumber making 50k a year who's 5'8 you can bet your buttocks he'll be happy to just have a woman to call his own.

JSBelle · 2022-08-11T00:58:53+00:00

Is this a spoof of the men posting about women?

anubhav23 · 2022-08-11T06:05:30+00:00

Hmm. So what's the plan? How do you think about progressing further?

vcreativ · 2022-08-11T13:12:59+00:00

TRP dehumanises both men and women. Neither is true, they're both human. You can't just pretend that one half of humanity isn't human, let alone both. If neither men nor women are human, then who is, exactly?

Just by exposing yourself to TRP you're overexposing yourself to toxic masculinity and femininity. Which is exactly what you're feeling.

For starters, no more TRP content. That basically means delete your YouTube account, otherwise these videos will haunt you forever.

It's all about who and what you expose yourself to. Good people exist. And if you vibe the right way they'll even find you. But "vibing" in the right way takes a lot of self-work. I mean the emotional kind, getting to grips with your subconscious and pains and things like that. You know, the stuff no one wants to do and everyone really should.

To assume that it must be everyone else's fault is narcissistic. So you're viewing the world through that lens as it is, meaning that's what you'll see, a lot.

Overall, it's pretty simple, don't believe TRP. Their objective isn't to share truth, it's to depress you. So in general, it's far more accurate to assume they're lying in all instances than to carefully dissect the lies from the half-truths. From a manipulator even the truth is probably a lie depending on the context it's shared in.

This is not based on failing at dating, if anything it’s the experience of men ”falling” very easily and wanting to be in relationships immediately.

"Failing at dating" is very different for different people even within the same gender. For many guys it's akin to a constant stream of rejections, which will often result in the behaviour you're describing. Many become "needy" because from their perspective female attention is rare. It's not great, or even attractive, but kind of understandable.

For many women that's not at all how it presents itself. The issue appears to be much closer to "I get lots of attention, but never from anyone I like getting it from, or not in the way that I want". This again will result in a set of compensating behaviours.

And unless what you're describing is exactly what you want, you're certainly not "succeeding at dating" either, you're getting attention, which if you understand how guys function and factor their common experiences into it (one of rejection), isn't that surprising.

Naus1987 · 2022-08-11T14:12:38+00:00

If you look at society, and how people behave in general, it makes us all look like animals, lol!!

The secret is to recognize most people behave silly, and then learn how to spot the exceptional ones.

Additional bonus points if you recognize your own failings and actively try to work on them.

—

There’s a reason why advertisements, drugs, and media is so effective at fucking people over, and it’s because people don’t think critically enough.

Just think about how smart the average person is.

I promise you there are good people out there, but it will take effort to find them. And if you do, they’ll not all be looking super attractive. Socrates and Einstein are famous for their wisdom, but both looked like mules, lol.

fat_buddha_thighs · 2022-08-11T16:14:55+00:00

Instead of reading posts and comments in toxic internet forums, which are usually made up of really miserable and unsuccesful people, go out in the real world and meet actually social, balanced and reasonable men. If men in your real life are like red pill losers, you'll have to expand your social circles and maybe move somewhere where people are not that angry about life. I had the same problem when I started engaging in conversation with this kind of men, either on reddit or discord. It made me really pessimistic about the future. But then I turned 18, closed my social media accounts for a while and socialised enough to meet great people, both men and women, who like being around other people and who don't constantly complain about the unfairness of life. Wish you the best. I know how saddening it is to know how messed up many men on the internet are.

AbbreviationsMotor60 · 2022-08-11T16:55:38+00:00

So because a there are a handful of men who follow andrew tate, all men are monkeys who can't love. That's similar to how redpill people say all women care about is money or looks. To me, you are basically making generalizations just like they do.

LearningInternet · 2022-08-11T19:52:34+00:00

This is not based on failing at dating, if anything it’s the experience of men ”falling” very easily and wanting to be in relationships immediately.

Why don't you just talk to the men who have romantic feelings for you? You have men who want a relationship with you, just date them.

What should I say? No woman has ever found me attractive unless I use pictures of hot men, only gay men have not judged me for my low attractiveness level. I went into the RP because I had no irl proof of women actually liking below average men.

You have easy proof in real life that can possibly debunk RP, get into relationship and see by yourself if men can love, you'll see that they can. We men get into RP because of real life problems, not because we read some woman saying bad stuff on the web.

Gaddammitkyle · 2022-08-14T19:34:01+00:00

Good, because most of us aren't. We are subhuman and disposable. We arent good for anything. The world would be a better place if we were thrown into a grinder at birth, or euthanized if we dont reach a specific level of masculinity and desirability. The only reason we are allowed to exist is because low paying positions at certain companies need to be filled.

Title	How do I humanise men again?
Author	lemoncurdmacaron
Upvotes	58
Comments	101
Date	August 10, 2022 6:28 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/wl4ucf/how_do_i_humanise_men_again/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/how-do-i-humanise-men-again.1126869 https://theredarchive.com/post/1126869

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