Been thinking about what “being nice” really means.

We’ve all heard the adage: “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

If being nice means silencing your authentic opinions or outwardly behaving in a polite manner that doesn’t align with how you truly feel, does that imply niceness is a form of deception?

“Well-behaved women seldom make history.” If everyone (regardless of gender) behaved “nice” would important social changes not have been effectuated? E.g. ending slavery, incorporating women’s right to vote, equal pay, etc.

Raising this topic in this community since the question touches on expected gender roles & characteristics people consider in mate selection.