FWB is the meta! I feel this 1000% and have had good exp what do you folks think?

General_Doubt7181 · 2023-02-04T15:28:28+00:00

Fwb would work out for you guys, if both people involved were men 😂😂

Time and time again, women on every form of social media complaining that their fwb is being … just an fwb… they don’t know what went wrong and why is he just using them for sex.

Experience will tell you that women just can’t.

Sources: both men and women in the comments every where ever.

I wonder what the girl on the other side of your fwb is posting just about now 🤣

WildCardSolly4 · 2023-02-04T18:36:07+00:00

31f. I've had a few.

Met at a bar, he lived a few cities away so we had a dirty weekend once a month. It was on and off and things eventually fizzled out. We stayed friends on FB an said hi occasionally.
Met on tinder and I became infatuated with him, he didn't reciprocate feelings and kept changing his mind between wanting a relationships and not wanting one. After a fall out I ghosted him and haven't heard from him since.
Hooked up a few times and he was moving away to another country in a few months. I eventually met someone else and we stopped hooking up. I haven't seen him since but if I bump into him I'll definitely have a catch up with him.
Hooked up throughout lockdown for several months. Everything was closed so we basically banged and occasionally got drunk. He asked to be exclusive and I said yes, then he said he loved me and the rest is history.

They worked well for me because a the time I wasn't in a position to have a relationship. I was going through personal stuff that meant I wasn't able to be a good girlfriend.

However, they definitely have a shelf life and can get messy. But dating can get messy anyway.

WildCardSolly4 · 2023-02-04T19:14:52+00:00

FWB is a hack, a cheese weapon to navigate the mindfield of emotional cowardness of millenials and gen Zs. It's low commitment, and easy to justify breaking it off. It's emotionally unnourishing however and does not level you up in terms of emotional maturity, and relationship skills. You learn to "communicate" what your smallest complaints are, you don't learn to drop silly issues and listen to your partner. You don't learn to grow as a person as part of a relationship/family, you just keep your single person headspace, pet peeves and generally selfish relationship patterns. Trust me, i blazed through my later 20s just with FWBs.

To keep the gaming metaphor, if you ever got a super strong weapon or combo at the start of the RPG and cheesed your way through most of it, when that trick stops working and you need to find other ways to beat a challenge you will find yourself horrendously underpowered because you paid no attention to any other mechanic of the game. I am not sure if people are made to be monogamous or not, I would guess not, but I am 100% sure people are meant to be in dedicated relationships where you are steadfast in making the relationship work - even when it stops being convenient or easy.

AstronautLoveShack · 2023-02-04T14:05:11+00:00

My husband started out an FWB. I'm all for it.

Different_Weekend817 · 2023-02-04T16:38:31+00:00

i concur, it's great. presently sleeping with my best friend and had a few fwb in the past, all successful. confident i would still be friends with my past fwb too had i not moved country and lost contact with them.

it's not for everyone tho; you gotta be really certain there's no chance of romantic attachment, otherwise it can get messy (so i hear). me, i was very good friends with these women before we started knocking boots so that's why it worked for us. from general observation tho, unfortunately many men can't get a fwb because they can't be arsed to be genuine friends with women in the first place.

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2023-02-04T16:16:06+00:00

I had an on off fwb for about 15 years. Started at 15 finished not long after I turned 30.

We dated for a few weeks at 13, all very innocent. We stayed friends. We went in a school trip and got a bit drunk and had sex, it was really bad his first time and we laughed our heads off. Tried it sober the next day and it went much better. We are still friends now, we tried a few times over the years but a relationship never worked.

I honestly think it worked so well as neither of us wanted more plus we were really good friends. The times we did get together was outside pressure from our friends who always wanted us to get together

Loose-Bet-3787 · 2023-02-04T18:14:45+00:00

My bf and I started as fwb. We were both going through things and didn’t have the time or emotion to dedicate to a relationship. We became good friends and eventually a relationship happened. I think if you’re on the same page as someone a fwb is definitely the ideal situation for a young person

No-Rough-7390 · 2023-02-04T14:10:21+00:00

FWB is the friendzone for women. It’s the best set up if you’re a guy who doesn’t want anything serious. Basically soft harem game. Did if for a while in my late 20s. Great times.

Complex-Glass-8539 · 2023-02-04T18:50:27+00:00

Like, yeah, it’s by far the best situation as a guy, honestly, it’s pretty good for both. If you have a really strong connection you get together long term, if you don’t, it stays FWB or fizzles. The only people it doesn’t work for are trad con princesses who have this fairy tail burned into their brain, men who can’t get FWB’s and the women who don’t know how to accept their own decisions and believe themselves to be entitled to romantic relationships.

begayallday · 2023-02-04T23:43:39+00:00

It’s not a bad setup when you can find someone able to handle it. That’s the hard part I think, and it’s just as difficult to find men who are really capable of that arrangement. The problem with men is that they want to skip out on the “friends” part. But on rare occasions I have found a few men here or there who were good at it. Like yeah, I want to fuck, but I also want to just hang out and watch movies and talk about life sometimes too.

The problem with FWB is that eventually I find myself wanting more out of a relationship. Just not with them.

CimZim · 2023-02-04T14:37:16+00:00

I've been a FWB (close friends who have sex a few times every month BUT are never going to live together, share finances, get married, be introduced to family members as a bf/gf, etc) for 15 years. It may not appeal to as many women as men, but imo it is the perfect kind of casual relationship for childfree people.

domdomdom333 · 2023-02-04T14:27:28+00:00

That's where the resentment comes from for a lot of men. FWB is praised so much but a ton of men haven't had the chance to try this out.

Me neither. I'm mid twenties. Would love to gain at least some confidence from a FWB situation but doesn't seem like that'll be the case.

All this acknowledgement of how valuable no strings attacked are to finding out who you are yourself as a basic first step is amplify the fear of missing out so many have.

DebateRoyal4525 · 2023-02-04T15:44:52+00:00

Is the meta something people say now?

SillyMushroomTip · 2023-02-05T00:02:30+00:00

FWBs never workout long term. Someone always catches feelings

justforlulz12345 · 2023-02-05T02:05:03+00:00

I want a real relationship. Fwb would give some validation but I’d probably fall for them at some point and when it doesn’t happen in reverse I’ll be left wanting.

caobozo · 2023-02-04T14:20:47+00:00

fwb situations could never work for me because it sounds like a normal relationship (you're friends and you have sex) but without the romance and commitment and i simply would hate that

WildCardSolly4 · 2023-02-04T14:45:46+00:00

It would help if so many traditionally minded women weren’t such selfish shitty partners filled to the brim with toxic masculinity 😂. Then maybe we wouldn’t have so many divorces or women that are happier single😭…. Just wanted to throw that in the mix too.

Act like you don’t know what I mean if you want to the women will get it 💀🤣

FWB bois up 1000

Impossible_You_8555 · 2023-02-04T14:49:15+00:00

Casual sex is winning it

FWB isn't the meta but it is the silver medal, that fwb is probably getting some strange and he is doing less work than you

Basically who ever gets sex from the same woman with less work, investment and having to pretend to give a fuck is winning the most

The husband down the line is the loser who's left holding the bag, the fwb did pretty well and got sex at a lower cost than any later ltrs she has

ManWazo · 2023-02-04T14:12:11+00:00

Agreed. Having a bunch of fwbs is the best. I never understand why people chase longterm monogamy, since most of them complains about financial imbalances, cheating and sexlessness which are inherent to this kind of relationships.

96tillinfinity_ · 2023-02-04T14:30:20+00:00

Before getting into all the RP, BP, Black Pill, PPD stuff, id always felt more of a FWB/Casual person. Im currently 26 (male) and id say ive felt this way my entire teenage years and early 20s

Ive never been in a relationship but ive had a lot of flings and FWBs and in my experience this is the best way to do it. I keep peace of my mind without stresses of being tied down and im still able to make connections with cool women

Im not saying people should avoid LTRs for FWBs because everyone is different. I personally enjoy being able to meet women, chat casually, build small connections and enjoy eachother sexually.

I keep an open mind to a LTR but i prefer casual/FWBs. More fun. Less stress. No overthinking

TheScabSlayerTRP · 2023-02-04T16:17:00+00:00

So to preface I’ll say this, my notch count is in the triple digits, have many FWB’s, casuals yada yada. 4 semi-long to long stint relationships but nothing besides a few engagements. Also make more money than 99% of people in this sub, so I’ve got the chasing the bag thing squared away. I’m 30 now. I’m originally from the North. I live in Asia pacific now. This is all information to understand my point of view.

The ‘next level maturity’ that you are implying in your edit ain’t mature. It just ain’t that my G. It’s one of the most harmful selfish things you can do for your future if perpetuated. Now don’t take this the wrong way, but I can interpret the way you write, and the lack of formality’s, poor punctuation that your mind is young and it needs a lot more development. There’s nothing wrong with having friend with benefits, in fact people need it when they are in there young 20’s with all due regard. To understand how people work, how to feel and how to figure out what they want. However on the contrary I don’t recommend people going to the extreme levels that I did. Here’s why.

Have you ever been to the beach with you mates, drinking and tanning all day. Hearing the waves slowly rolling onto the sands, with scattered clouds overhead and the sun just starting to set behind them. The skies a-blazed with orange hues while the sun dips behind the mountains. You’ve been people watching all day in your festivities. Then this person shows up.

An old man or woman, walking on the beach alone. They’ve let themselves go by this point, whether through the attrition of age or a lack of desire. You can tell that they are free spirited. The hair, the walk, the tattoos, the very being of them, you just know. There’s that vibe that you just know. You match there eyes, and you see it. The glazed over stare. A life where they have no one to care for them or depend on them anymore. No purpose. A life without love and purpose. A life solely based on flesh and dopamine chasing. A life squandered. That’s not living, that’s just existing in a hell of one that you’ll never escape.

We humans are social creatures. We’ve evolved to have sex, to procreate and continue our blood line. It’s literally our DNA’s purpose. We’ve also evolved to be around others and sharing a bed when we sleep. To love. Knowing that those people will most likely never have that again. That’s something I can’t agree with. That’s why I’ll never condone a life of perpetual friend with benefits ideals for either side.

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PsychologicalHand155 · 2023-02-04T21:38:09+00:00

So you are friends who fuck until they get in a relationship, suddenly their new partner is jealous of you and your friend will prioritize their s/o over you. Now you are out of a fuck buddy and a friend.

Why do y’all even do fwb? That’s just a bf/gf/spouse.

Title	FWB is the meta! I feel this 1000% and have had good exp what do you folks think?
Author	WildCardSolly4
Upvotes	1
Comments	116
Date	February 4, 2023 2:01 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/10th2jt/fwb_is_the_meta_i_feel_this_1000_and_have_had/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/fwb-is-the-meta-i-feel-this-1000-and-have-had-good.1150930 https://theredarchive.com/post/1150930

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