As a girl I sort of get it now

aircoft · 2018-06-11T05:24:04+00:00

i posted on R/feminism earlier simply cause i want to have an actual conversation with a feminist and i was banned i was super respectful about it too

Vandechoz · 2018-06-11T06:21:10+00:00

Like you can admit men face problems too!!!

They are doing this on an individual level these days. A man can have sympathy for facing a problem. BUT only if they get to blame men as a class for those problems at the same time. It's a fun game they play.

filthgrinder · 2018-06-11T08:32:28+00:00

You should see the documentary The Red Pill, a feminist takes a trip into MensRights movement. It's pretty great.

perplexedm · 2018-06-11T05:32:34+00:00

Thank you so much for having an open mind. Have a great day.

AmuseDeath · 2018-06-11T05:55:41+00:00

The first thing to understand is that feminism =/= women's rights. You can be for women's rights (in fact I think everyone here is for that), but you don't have to be a feminist. This is a lie that many, many famous feminists put out there to scare people into becoming a feminist:

Gal Gadot (aka Wonder Woman): "If you aren't a feminist you are a sexist."

The other thing is that men and women are built differently and wired differently. Equal rights is a good thing, but different outcomes is not only acceptable, but it's a natural thing. More men will be interested in STEM just because we are wired for that. More women will be attracted to nursing or teaching and that's okay. We should not assume there's some evil force at play preventing underwater mechanics from being 50% women. Men and women prefer and are good at different things. Embrace differences.

Check out:

www.realsexism.com

dingoperson2 · 2018-06-11T08:26:17+00:00

The interactions I've seen can generally be summed up as:

Feminists: Here's several ways women are disadvantaged.

Men: Oh, that's bad. Here's several ways men are disadvantaged quite badly, probably even worse.

Feminists: We aren't talking about men right now. Why do you have to make everything about you? You're incapable of not talking about yourself? We're talking about women and if you can't respect that just leave.

Men: Here's several ways men are disadvantaged.

Feminists: Actually, that's not as bad as it looks at all, women have it far worse. Here's a long list of all the ways women have it far worse than what you just mentioned.

Men: ....

Feminists: Here's some problems women have.

Men: Oh, that's bad. It seems that partially women could reduce these problems if they made better choices, e.g. not moving in with people convicted of domestic violence.

Feminists: Victim blamers! Fuck you, victim blamers!

Men: Here's some problems men have.

Feminists: Actually, a lot of that is just due to the bad choices of men. Men can only blame themselves.

Men: ....

Feminists: Men are behaving badly towards women.

Men: Actually, not all men are doing that.

Feminists: Oh, boo hoo! #NOTALLMEN

Men: Women are acting badly towards men.

Feminists: Misogynists! Losers! You're taking out your own inadequacies by hating all women!

Men: ...

I've concluded that feminists are generally psychopaths and monsters, and wish them the absolute worst. It's not really about politics or facts, it's about those involved being absolute evil.

IconHash · 2018-06-11T08:36:22+00:00

Have you seen the movie "The red pill"? It was made by a feminist and tries to take an unbiased look at both sides. My girlfriend was feeling like she didn't really agree with the feminist movement anymore (She is Spanish, vegan and used to be gay), we watched the movie together and afterwards she told me she definitely wasn't a feminist anymore.

theothermod · 2018-06-11T07:58:05+00:00

Every week there are more women like you expressing their dissatisfaction with feminism. I'd suggest not to worry too much - you're just at the front of the new wave.

XenoX101 · 2018-06-11T09:53:49+00:00

There's a simple test for this: If it is a matter of principle (i.e. not about strict biological differences), then try swapping the word "Male" for "Female". If this makes you think the opinion is sexist or misogynistic, then you ought to be critical of that opinion. It sounds like you have intuitively identified this yourself, which is great. The problem is the more radical strain of feminists that typically voice such opinions have gained a lot of power, and it is becoming increasingly difficult to point out these hypocrisies.

The reason women such as yourself should be concerned, is that it will make men more depressed, less productive and subsequently less desirable for women. Society will function worse for both men and women if men are thrown in dumpster or left by the wayside.

You have done the right thing. Men should be concerned about women's issues that are not at the expense of men, and women should be concerned about men's issues that are not at the expense of women. And you will find a reasonable amount of people do agree with this notion.

The problem is with the radicals, the people who "cross the line" so to speak and post horridly sexist articles such as this one (just imagine if the outrage if that article read "women" instead of "men"). These are the people that feminism have enabled that need to be kicked down a peg. If you find yourself in company with such people, you either try to make them see the wrongness in their ways, or you walk away (if you can without it significantly affecting your career or livelihood), since they will either bring you down or fill you with resentment, neither of which are healthy or productive.

It's important also to remember that such women didn't always hate men or show such blatant disregard for their problems. It is a new phenomenon, and therefore it should be fixable. We just need more level-headed individuals such as yourself who refuse the "us vs. them" doctrine.

DriverDude777 · 2018-06-11T06:36:47+00:00

You sound mature and your ability to empathize is a good personality trait. There is shitty people on both sides of the fence so hopefully you find/found a good guy. Don't be trapped.

throwaway_ftb · 2018-06-11T08:10:15+00:00

like when they imply trying to make mgm illegal would take away from feminist efforts towards fgm when it's already illegal... self-absorbed sexists is who they r.

Aatch · 2018-06-11T11:27:02+00:00

Honestly, I don't care if feminists aren't concerned with men's rights. It's the active hostility towards the men's rights movement that frustrates me. They won't help men and they won't let men help themselves.

peskysquirms · 2018-06-11T05:39:20+00:00

So you were a Type II feminist, there's hope for you. Read some books from the authors I mentioned here, they'll provide you the necessary foundation to stand toe-to-toe with the crazies and know what to say: https://np.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/8q6ypn/comment/e0gyppu

TroLLageK · 2018-06-11T09:42:20+00:00

First of all, thank you for opening up your heart and mind to realize the injustices men face.

21F, I'd love to chat if you would want to. I've always been devils advocate and voiced openly for the rights of all, but have been openly anti-feminist for about 7 years now.

I can recommend you to many resources, groups, articles, media, etc. that can help you find some more information on mens rights. Welcome to the red pill, sister!

crnext · 2018-06-11T09:30:18+00:00

Feminism is no more about equality than heads or tails is about standing a coin on its edge.

The very name feminism is derived from the French word femme which literally translates to 'woman'.

True equality has a name. Its called egalitarianism, and does not have any bias for race, sex, creed, etc.

Fuck Feminism.

I need feminism because without it, I might have been allowed to live a normal life.

Froghat_Vendor · 2018-06-11T07:20:49+00:00

The term you want, the term we should all gladly embrace is egalitarian. We're egalitarians when we want equal rights and opportunity for all humans.

Otter_Actual · 2018-06-11T06:36:14+00:00

Feminism used to be about women's rights. Now it's about women superiority.

JestyerAverageJoe · 2018-06-11T10:43:42+00:00

Have you watched the film The Red Pill yet? I think you would really enjoy it.

2018-06-11T13:11:09+00:00

Like you can admit men face problems too!!!

As a man I can confirm we face at least as many problems as women, if not more.

2018-06-11T13:32:07+00:00

As a guy I always could empathize with feminists. I grew up with a single mom who was a very hard worker, in fact all the women in my family were hard workers and lots of the men had addiction issues and not very supportive/abusive sometimes. My mom grandma and aunt all supported themselves and helped support me and my college education. I never heard them say a single negative thing about men in my life.

I come to college and it’s like night and day.. women who call themselves “feminist” yet have lazy piss poor attitudes and lots of them have drug and drinking Issues. They also unapologetically spout hatred for men the same way an idiot neo nazi proudly proclaims their hatred for all non white people. Actually the lines of logic aren’t much different sometimes.

Glad to see you’ve opened your eyes to the nonsense. You’ll probably do much better in life than a lot of those women.

Copidosoma · 2018-06-11T14:17:37+00:00

Doesn't sound like ranting. Gives me a sliver of hope actually.

bklee83 · 2018-06-11T11:58:15+00:00

Caring about women's rights/equality doesn't make one apathetic to menes. Being a selfish blind person will though.

Meggarea · 2018-06-11T13:05:09+00:00

You are not alone. Many women, myself included, agree with you. If you are still in school, that's part of the problem, I think. Colleges can turn into serious echo chambers. Don't fight with the crazy ones, and eventually you will be able to surround yourself with like minded people. Honestly, I think that the feminist movement as it stands right now is unsustainable, because it's crazy. We obviously can't kill all men, and I for one wouldn't want to.

tmone · 2018-06-11T13:15:27+00:00

welcome aboard!!

tenchineuro · 2018-06-11T13:21:08+00:00

But the thing is, after actually interacting with them, I realize feminists don't actually care about if their actions are on the expense of men's justice.

They care very much, many feminist actions don't even help women, they just hurt men. For example, Title IX legislation says that in colleges, there cannot be more men's sports teams than women's teams. Since all the women interested in sports were already involved, this has led to the cutting of thousands of men's teams across the country to no benefit of women.

Feminism cares very much that things be done at the expense of men, that's the idea.

Isellmacs · 2018-06-11T14:30:35+00:00

I dont get why caring about women's rights makes you apathetic to men.

It doesn't. Caring about women's rights isn't the same thing as feminism. Feminism is toxic, but it's certain possible to care about women's rights and male rights as the same time. You just can't care about both and be feminist.

Morningsun92 · 2018-06-11T14:30:41+00:00

3rd wave feminism is like that, tearing down men to build themselves up, glad you're not falling for it :D

Florient · 2018-06-11T14:59:49+00:00

What it is is feminism is controlled by psychopaths, the true SHW type has anti social personality disorder so do not feel any empathy.

2018-06-11T15:10:01+00:00

Better late than never!

chadwickofwv · 2018-06-11T16:59:47+00:00

I don't get why caring about women's rights makes you apathetic to men.

This is because women already have all the rights men do, and then some. If you are arguing for "equal rights" for women and women already have more rights than men, then you have to minimize all of men's problems in order to make your selfish demands sound more legitimate.

curiousjourney · 2018-06-11T17:14:51+00:00

check out youtuber - shoeonhead

Lethn · 2018-06-11T10:52:46+00:00

I'll give you the same advice I give everyone who find themselves surrounded by these sorts of cunts. Go out and explore different cities within your country or go to different areas, I guarantee you the attitude will dramatically change.

What it is, is that feminists and left wingers all hang out in major cities and in extremely self-segregated communities. Which is why it can feel like they're the only ones around if that's the area you've grown up in or generally lived in your whole life.

Take it as an opportunity to go on a short holiday or something for a weekend. You'll feel better for it and you'll realise quickly what I'm on about, I've got this problem as well. I'm surrounded by left wingers, the moment I exit the city boundaries the attitude towards almost everything changes, these people do not represent the majority.

The U.S is a fascinating example but in the U.K it's worse I think, in the U.S you have the Californa west coast liberals and New York, places like that which heavily vote democrat. They're all extremely rich communities or well off middle class communities and they've convinced themselves that anybody who disagrees with them is some evil racist Trump supporting redneck because they're that segregated from society they don't even know it.

As one of the CNN reporters discovered when he actually bothered to go out and interview Trump supporters he was more than he ever realised. I've observed this myself and it really is ridiculous how much these sorts of people self-segregate and it explains how just completely uninformed their opinions have gotten. They lie to everybody and claim they're open minded and tolerant but the reality is they're just utterly indoctrinated into their beliefs and hate anyone different from them.

Go on holiday somewhere that voted differently to your area and make some worthwhile friends you can have conversations with can't stress it enough how much better off you'll be.

Lupinfujiko · 2018-06-11T18:54:25+00:00

Good for you. You are exhibiting individual rational reasoning.

That's where a great many of us are. And yet, it seems to fly in the face of everything we see or hear in the media and in the mainstream.

This is why we call it, "The Red Pill".

BruceCampbell123 · 2018-06-11T19:12:49+00:00

The problem I've found with most feminists is they always seem to default back to the dictionary definition of 'Feminism' to instantly disprove any hostility or fault on their part or any disregard they may have for the other side of the isle. The problem with that is you can say whatever it is that you believe, however, it's what you act out in the world that is actually what you believe. The definition of a word is how it plays itself out in the world in relation to other other people or ideas, not simply some sanitized dictionary definition that only exists in ink and paper.

They can claim that feminism is simply the belief in the equality between the sexes when, in reality, it's more about female privilege than anything else. If Feminists really did want equality for women and did care about the plights that men face, they would be protesting against circumcision, about the parental rights/custody disparity between mothers and fathers and they would also be concerned that only men seem to be occupying the dangerous and dirty jobs. Instead we only see a push for equal representation in cushy, air-conditioned, white-collar, well-paying jobs.

Feminism is also a performative contradiction in that it champions a woman's right to choose and independence except for when it goes outside of the acceptable feminist orthodoxy. A perfect example is the recent changes made to the Miss America contest where the bikini and evening dress segments have been cut due to some arbitrary claims that beauty shouldn't be the only thing that a woman should be valued for (which I agree with). However, why even have a Miss America contest in the first place? Where is this claim that women are only valued for their looks? What about the women in that pageant who want to be apart of the bikini contest? What of the choices of those women who like showing off their body?

To a feminist, they believe they know what's best for every women, convinced that if they do not look out for other women that they will make wrong choices that will contribute to their internalized misogyny. Feminism is ironically infantilizing women by claiming to represent their best interests and is robbing them of their individuality and autonomy because it treats all women as a collective monolith.

Philip8000 · 2018-06-12T04:37:28+00:00

No, we don't. Nobody has it easy; men or women. We've all got our own difficulties, problems, and even emotional scars. The crucial difference is that female problems matter and as a whole, male problems don't. For example, the falling life expectancy in the United States; what they don't tell you is that it's male life expectancy that's falling.

Ever since I started reading, I've also been reading feminist perspectives and threads in an effort to understand how and why they're apathetic to men. Some say they are supporting men; I think some of them are even genuine about it. The problem is that it has to be in a way that supports their beliefs and worldview, generally that men need to become more feminized.

kartu3 · 2018-06-12T04:46:55+00:00

Cool if you are real, although, looking at your nickname, you probably are not.

2018-06-12T07:23:59+00:00

even as a female, you should be concerned that feminism constantly infantilizes you and tells you you're a victim in need of redressal. it tells you not to take responsibility for your own actions cos you are a victim and victims expectedly go wrong here or there. think about it.

the chinese people too were exploited by western countries in the recent past. they didn't spend their time complaining. they simply worked their way out of the rut they found themselves in and are now achieving a global superpower status. but feminism encouraging a victim mindset among women and harming relations with men is the very thing stopping women from feeling confident about achieving stuff in their lives. just my 2c

CulturalMarksman · 2018-06-12T12:18:42+00:00

Why were you a feminist? Most women are not feminist.

2018-06-15T17:31:33+00:00

Supporting women's rights is a wonderful thing to do and it is not mutually exclusive to support men's rights.

That being said Feminism has a particular ideology (Patriarchy theory) that does not lend them room to care about equality. To them Men are awful oppressors and women helpless victims, how could men possibly be suffering at the hands of women if such is the case?

Feminism and equality is mutually exclusive but is important to remember that you can be supportive of equality without a label (or with one of your own choosing, I suggest egalitarian as it lacks significant ideological baggage)

sliferodoom · 2018-06-11T05:59:01+00:00

The problem is so many women’s rights activists and men’s rights activists deny that the other side is often justified in what they say, making both appear equally radical. My advice would be that you shouldn’t let either side persuade you entirely about anything, always be willing to seriously consider the other side.

osashta · 2018-06-11T19:29:22+00:00

I think the most vocal people tend to be the nutters. I'm a girl who considers herself a feminist but i think mens rights are very important, and most of the people i know who are feminists think the same way.

Edit: cheers for the downvotes, very mature

LateralThinker13 · 2018-06-11T22:14:39+00:00

I just am scared of interacting with these women, they don't seem easy to interact or live with. I just hope I never have to.

Head over to the spaces where rational female thinking is welcome. Personally, I recommend r/redpillwomen.

Title	As a girl I sort of get it now
Author	memelord_xXx
Upvotes	540
Comments	149
Date	June 11, 2018 5:20 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/8q702v/as_a_girl_i_sort_of_get_it_now/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/as-a-girl-i-sort-of-get-it-now.1177451 https://theredarchive.com/post/1177451

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