CMV: While cheating is universally immoral, a woman cheating is worse on several levels, and generally spells the end of a relationship.

The following video by the great Wheat Waffles really crystalizes what I think a lot of men (and even deep down, some women) instinctively know.

https://youtu.be/HKD4wo8XBGI?si=VwppqjL5hVhjErR0

A woman cheating on a man is generally objectively “worse” than a man doing the same.

Now, this does not mean the emotional consequences of the cheating is any different. Getting cheated on absolutely hurts the same for both men and women (albeit probably for slightly different reasons), but looking at the reality of the reasons for cheating, the opportunities to do so, and the consequences of the aftermath of cheating, there is no comparison.

To summarize the huge differences that make the impact of cheating worse when it’s a woman cheating on a committed man:

⁃ Paternal Uncertainty is a very real and primal driver of men’s feelings of betrayal.   ⁃ Time and resources.  While a man is in a relationship, he is investing time and resources into a woman as he is the initiator of almost every step of escalation in it.  Further, the man is not able to cultivate “options” passively the way a woman does.  A woman may “make new friends that happen to be men”, but turn around and accuse a man of “trying to cheat” if a man gets a girl’s number in a totally platonic context. ⁃ Emotional impact - Women are more likely to not only need to feel some sort of emotional and deeper level of attraction for a man before they have sex with him, the act of sex itself can create an even stronger attachment.  This has been stated by women on PPD time and again. 

In the aftermath of cheating:

⁃ Women enjoy massive support and the support of friends and generally the presumption of innocence (ie “what did he do to make you cheat?”) and thus can evade feelings of guilt and shame far easier than a man can.  A man is roundly derided as a piece of shit by men and women alike if he cheats. ⁃ A woman can self medicate and jump on Chad’s cock within 24 hours to “feel sexy again” regardless of any hit to her self esteem.  Meanwhile, a man will have no such options if he hasn’t cultivated them.  And even still, an emotionally wounded man is repulsive to women, so ironically, in the time a man may benefit most from a hook up to “feel desirable again” after being cheated on, he is actually LESS desirable to women than ever.  

Again, to reiterate, I’m only talking about the practicalities of the cheating, both are immoral, but unless you believe “both sexes are exactly the same and experience and think about sex in the act same way”, I can see nothing here that would indicate a man and woman cheating are equivalent.

At the very least, if a woman cheats, it can be pretty well assumed that the relationship is well done and over and probably has been for some time (as women on PPD have also indicated)