Girl flakes but invites me to a house party next day. Need some advice.

mercush · 2022-03-18T14:05:19+00:00

I wouldn't assume she just wants to use you to "look good", that seems paranoid.

If you go to the party you don't have to act all couple-y with her. I'd go, have fun, talk to everyone and at the end of the party either make sure you're the last person there with her or invite her to yours.

UnderstandingNo4813 · 2022-03-18T13:45:13+00:00

Bro you are reading way too much into this and it seems like you’ve got a big ego. Lol’d at the “not sure if I want to be seen in public with her” line - if that’s the case then move on. You must be young or inexperienced, most women aren’t going to just go over to a strange man’s house and fuck them. It’s a safety issue, they are scared of being assaulted or raped while we don’t have that fear when dealing with the opposite sex. They also don’t want to feel like a sex toy, that’s why they usually want to meet at a bar for a drink or in your case house party so they don’t feel like a slut or get judged.

SpookyKG · 2022-03-18T14:25:28+00:00

How pathetic, you'd sleep with her but not be seen in public, with strangers, with her?

How much time in the day do you spend looking in the mirror?

shipsAreWeird123 · 2022-03-18T15:01:13+00:00

Seems like she felt like things were moving too fast. Instead of go over for a booty call, she deferred to a public event.

The way you talk about this girl is horrible. If you're not into her, don't string her along. I'm reading some insecurity between the lines despite your ego. It feels like you're using her looks to diminish her so that if this is a rejection, you have something to fall back in.

Most people aren't just trying to use other people for clout. They want to hangout with people who they like. Sure my boyfriend likes having a pretty girl on his arm at parties. But he didn't start going out with me for clout, that's ridiculous. But people are also sometimes shallow, and only into people for their looks. Part of why many people choose to wait to have sex is to try and weed out all the people just interested in you for your appearance or a casual hookup.

My guess is that your looks are what's made it easy for you with this girl. But looks only get you so far.

yahboiiiiiiiiii · 2022-03-18T19:05:09+00:00

You sound like a jerk, the way you talk about women. They aren't achievements to unlock or put on display. They are human beings. You got some learning to do. For her sake cut this off, she deserves more than you are offering

2022-03-18T15:26:43+00:00

Dude WTF how do you interprete someone rescheduling and then inviting you for a party as flaking Also you sound like an ass

jcadsexfree · 2022-03-18T17:09:10+00:00

She wants to check you out in social situations more carefully. She likes you but she needs more proof that you are well-adjusted. It's a typical shit-test. Not unfriendly, although she is info-gathering.

Take all this as opportunity and don't get too stoned / drunk.

SuperSultan · 2022-03-18T15:23:24+00:00

Man, accept that invitation right now.

You are planning too much, accept that invitation, go there, don't ignore her, don't be like a poop glued to a shoe, be natural and not a guy with a giant ego "She wants to use me to look good" XD 🤡

See how is the party, if you like people, maybe you'll meet some friends or whatever. Text her right now!

Prof4CMV · 2022-03-18T15:50:10+00:00

Bro hate to break it to you but you’re not really that attractive if you’re writing posts like this..

ScepticScorpio · 2022-03-18T17:20:24+00:00

Hopefully this humbles you. You must be an ugly as mofo if this is your thought process when kickin it with women. And I’m speaking on all aspects not just looks. You’ll find out the hard way lil dude, just keep being immature

Staphany · 2022-03-18T18:59:05+00:00

Don't go to the party, save her the trouble. Also bashing someone for their looks is not the flex you think it is.

whomeverIwishtobe · 2022-03-18T19:15:13+00:00

This is a really toxic mindset OP and you wanna try to break out of that.

Putting so much pressure on appearances and what’s above or below average, that is a mindset that will only cause you suffering.

All that matters is if YOU find the person attractive and don’t let society or your bad beliefs limit your ability to be seen in public with a person you are otherwise interested in.

If you aren’t interested in anything beyond a hookup with this person, you can also just be clear about that I have in the past it works sometimes.

snowdude11 · 2022-03-18T16:32:48+00:00

She may be ugly but you got an ugly personality my guy...

Competitive-Link-912 · 2022-03-18T16:03:06+00:00

If you don’t want to be seen with her, why would you want to sleep with her?

Another little boy…

dobbs1997 · 2022-03-18T17:21:38+00:00

Why do you care about being seen with her in public ? I think that’s the main issue you gotta address here, the fact that you give a fuck about what people think…

2022-03-18T18:26:03+00:00

Sounds like she got nervous about going over alone and decided it was best to meet you in a public setting instead. Go to the party and have fun. There's less pressure for both of you in this situation.

2022-03-18T13:48:33+00:00

One move might be to get to the party on the earlier side, make an impact, tell her you have to go meet some friends, and then circle back with her towards the end of the night. Or you can just tell her you have plans but you guys should stay in touch throughout the night. Then at the end of the night, you can invite her to yours/go to hers. You can also just do another night entirely.

shesagoodfella · 2022-03-18T19:27:20+00:00

Hmmmm maybe she just didn’t wanna be alone with someone she doesn’t know that well and would be more comfortable with more people around? Also did you call her ugly ? Lol

FerraFranko · 2022-03-18T20:30:04+00:00

Aayyoooo you’re a fucking weirdo. I bet you still go to high school parties

Playful_Copy_4255 · 2022-03-18T17:32:27+00:00

No need to act so gross about it, jeez. I doubt it’s all that deep for her stop acting like you’re such a prize here and talking bad about her.

Skizznitt · 2022-03-18T21:14:39+00:00

Lol that ego... Gtfo man, you're definitely not a catch.

jackzander · 2022-03-18T21:33:25+00:00

This post, your edits and comments are priceless.

No one tries this hard to fuck someone who's not at least in their "league". 😂

kalixxte · 2022-03-18T22:14:14+00:00

So you want to fuck a 'less attractive' girl and discard her once you get your two pumps in, but are annoyed that she'd rather meet you in a public setting first and you think she's only doing that to make herself look good?? Oh, and you are too embarrassed to be seen with her, but fully intend to hit on he'd 'hotter' friends in front of her?

Dude, just unmatch her and move on. MAJOR fuckboy vibes here.

Prof4CMV · 2022-03-18T18:51:16+00:00

If you’re so good looking why didn’t you just call one of the other girls that are swooning for you?

LocalizedMotion · 2022-03-18T20:01:35+00:00

The way you talk about this young woman is horrible. What if this was your sister or mother and some jerk was saying these things about them? You seem to think you’re very attractive but your words here have shown us the opposite is true. I really hope you take a lot of these comments to heart and change your approach/perspective on interacting with women.

difuzion1 · 2022-03-18T14:29:10+00:00

Pretty sure she’s just trying to not feel like a slut lol. Worse comes to worse just show up at the party chat her up, when you show up with a chick at a house party you’re already doing better than the guys in a woman’s eyes.

defpara · 2022-03-18T20:14:27+00:00

You want sex. She wants public affirmation. I dare you not to go since she stood you up first. But I guess you have nothing else to do. It's a power move. You went from what you want (which was accelerated for her), to now you're in her shoes deciding if it's worth it or not.

But on the other hand if you could go and meet other people, you're social fluency would give you more favor or influence and you may be able to cast a wider net. Good luck.

Carrabs · 2022-03-18T20:28:15+00:00

You’re making a lot of assumptions here. Most likely she just felt uncomfortable coming over last night and she feels safer meeting you in a controlled environment with people around. If you want to go, go. If you don’t, don’t.

EmbarrassedNaivety · 2022-03-18T20:50:33+00:00

Yikes. You sound like a pig. Leave the poor girl alone-better yet, leave all women alone until you are able to treat them like human beings that deserve respect. You’re no better than her and you solely judging her off of looks is childish. Any respectable woman will see right through you and realize how shallow and insecure you actually are.

ATWaltz · 2022-03-18T21:18:41+00:00

The obvious conclusion would be that she was a little unsure of/worried about inviting someone to her house for safety reasons after thinking about it, even though she was and is keen. She sees the house party as an opportunity to meet you in a neutral environment where sex can immediately take place but where she'd have an extra element of safety.

OtPayOkerSmay · 2022-03-18T21:19:31+00:00

I think your hunch is right - she wants to raise her SMV and use you as arm candy. And you would be poisoning the well being seen with a girl that is significantly less attractive than you. NEXT.

cheesequesopesoplz · 2022-03-18T21:50:19+00:00

So to me it seems like not that she dumped you or that dumped you but not the shit she flaked on you because she wasn’t interested she probably flaked on you because she’s gonna fuck somebody else in the first place and you came along and you almost made her change your mind that’s that’s what it seems like it’s happened as far as the party thing I think you’re 1000% correct it’s all for clout she wants to look good and she wants your friends to think that she looks good and she wants to gain status but if you don’t wanna be seen with you then don’t be seen with her because here’s one thing that women will never tell us they can since our energy times 10 they already have a game plan laid out in their head you think that we lay the game plan out now these women have already done 20 steps ahead of what they’re gonna do with us in any situation they already have it mapped out so I don’t think you ever think in her she knows she knows exactly what she wants to do and when she wants to do it um if that said if if you’re not and if something if you’re not feeling it you know if you don’t enjoy if you want to do it women know this now what do they say anything or not because they don’t really like confrontation some do most don’t is another thing but women know when you’re being genuine real legit fake nervous all that shit they know so be yourself because if you’re not she’s gonna notice then it’s gonna make it even more weird if she even ask you about it . But since you seem like a upstanding citizen that is not afraid to speak your mind it most likely will not be werid for you just weird for her and because of that she might avoid saying anything at all about it .

vicrollin420 · 2022-03-18T22:16:39+00:00

Go BUT bring your game for the other ladies

txdoses · 2022-03-18T22:44:56+00:00

Go. Stop overthinking

dropdeadjonathan · 2022-03-18T22:53:12+00:00

Don’t go, you’ll be sacrificed to a pagan forest god of fertility and worms, or something. Heed these words…

Beginning-Concept-43 · 2022-03-18T23:05:28+00:00

She was probably busy bro just go and be nice

graemeemi · 2022-03-19T09:20:24+00:00

This post has actually made me leave this sub. I it’s too much.

ebmnm · 2022-03-18T14:26:41+00:00

Dude go to the party and scope out other chicks lmao worst case scenario your stuck with her and you get some either way

YetzirahToAhssiah · 2022-03-18T18:16:10+00:00

Stop thinking so much about her status, your status, your ego...

...and just go have fun at a party

waterbaby66 · 2022-03-18T18:36:10+00:00

OP, if this is truly the way you feel about people who are “not as attractive as you” I feel sorry for you and I’m sorry that whatever happened in your past that made you this shallow. But truth be told is that your gonna be miserable your whole life if you base a meaningful relationship on looks!!! You’re missing out on women who Beautiful on the inside too and it has been my experience that these are the women who are genuine, low maintenance, and loyal to a fault!!!! God Bless You and I hope you get a taste of your own medicine someday. I’m sorry to be so mean and I’m sorry for your again…….☮️🙏 #prayforUkraine

mabden · 2022-03-18T15:26:09+00:00

The only reason to go to the party is to game her hot friends. Of course read her first to gage her interest first.

FallFromGr4ce · 2022-03-18T14:36:47+00:00

Meet other girls at the party use her as a catalyst

stop_stopping · 2022-03-18T14:56:21+00:00

If she's that beastly then i would hesitate going BUT you could also use it as an opportunity to meet other wimins who might be there

I once said yes to this girl who was a couple points below me and yep, got some weird looks while out. one random girl made a face you could CLEARLY tell was saying "wtf y'all are not looksmatched." it was great.

alikebabay · 2022-03-18T14:12:09+00:00

Yeah, no She wants to use you for attention She is not into you Don't go

caledonguy · 2022-03-18T15:40:04+00:00

Bro I totally get what you're saying but how bad is she tho? Overweight or just not an attractive face? Both? I get your low-key game since that's what I do also but if you wanna pull a toxic boi move go meet her freinds and game one of them. Then sleep with that original girl and try to get with her freind later. You got nothing to lose except maybe catching an std lol

adsq93 · 2022-03-18T18:53:02+00:00

Pretty sure she felt nervous and would rather have fun with you first. Get loose and then do whatever she wants.

maplemario · 2022-03-18T19:21:32+00:00

If you don’t wanna be seen with her at a party. Don’t go to the party with her.

Make up an excuse, suggest a day next week. Maybe Sunday?

Amkg2020 · 2022-03-18T19:25:38+00:00

It's a test she's probably not looking for the same or something along those lines

2022-03-18T19:37:08+00:00

Stop thinking too much like a tarot card reader bro. Just chill !

Ivabighairy1 · 2022-03-18T20:11:27+00:00

Skip it. Interested girls don’t flake. Go to the party and controls you and the frame.

KeyDragonfruit9 · 2022-03-18T20:11:51+00:00

That’s pretty rude to her, that you would be willing to use her for sex, but not willing to be seen with her in public, actually embarrassed to be associated with her. So she’s okay to use as essentially a tool to get off, but not to actually be decent to or show any respect to, to actually get to know.

If you wouldn’t like someone else treating you that way, you shouldn’t do it to someone else.

2022-03-18T20:41:07+00:00

OP tactic, bring two or more hot girls to the party and leverage them to hook with the hottest girls there. Forget about your Tinder match

Alert-Wishbone9032 · 2022-03-18T21:23:55+00:00

Maybe after her last message she thought better about it and instead wanted to see you in a more neutral type setting to see if she liked you actually or whether you weee looking for a quick hook up then would move on.

Deepika18 · 2022-03-18T22:02:47+00:00

You have way too big of an idea of yourself. You ain’t that important, just show .001% of humility it’ll make you think of how self aggrandizing you’re being.

tysonchen3o3 · 2022-03-18T22:46:49+00:00

nice girl sense some jerk…got scared of the hook up last minute… invites jerk to house party where all her friends are. If you a jerk, prepare for a ass whoopin.

Title	Girl flakes but invites me to a house party next day. Need some advice.
Author	DennisWeltz
Upvotes	90
Comments	96
Date	March 18, 2022 1:40 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/th1kx2/girl_flakes_but_invites_me_to_a_house_party_next/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/girl-flakes-but-invites-me-to-a-house-party-next.1264283 https://theredarchive.com/post/1264283

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