Okay - I’m going to start cold approaching

no_not_this · 2021-12-24T06:46:10+00:00

Don’t make it an activity. Make it your lifestyle. It’s going to put more pressure on you if you say “ok time to approach”. You’ll fuck it up. Everything you do day to day should be an opportunity. Grocery store. Coffee shop. Book store.

IamRocksteady · 2021-12-24T11:20:54+00:00

What have helped me tremendously was watching and learning from the Natural Lifestyles and James Tusk's videos. They have tones of actual cold approach footages with themselves and students, and you can see live what works and what doesn't. It also helps to see pro's getting blown out. This helps with reframing the rejections you inevitably get most of the time and to not take it personally. Good luck.

smind893 · 2021-12-24T13:05:59+00:00

The funny thing is, unless you're a hermit, there'd women already there to cold approach.

As others have commented, just the local places you go to. Market, building where you work/go to school, etc.

It's really easy tbh, but it takes 2 things.

Willing to try
Not letting rejection feel so personal.

Good luck bud

masmiester · 2021-12-24T10:59:54+00:00

Lots online about these or other people doing this... Go out and get comfortable being social / meeting random people, don't put too much pressure on yourself to be successful at the start.

Try and find other people who like going out/being social/picking up.

are you at college otherwise or live in a city - work out how to cultivate a more social life and how to meet girls in those environments where you usually live.

Edit ( missing text) just go out on your own if you have bad friends. It is not wierd. ( well only if you think it is ). If you want it you need to push forward yourself.

sslacaptain · 2021-12-24T11:16:10+00:00

Go grab a coffee and take a walk in a popular area

originalgainster · 2021-12-24T17:05:02+00:00

Any tips on how I can find settings to cold approach women on my own during the day or night time?

you can approach them anywhere.

Is it weird to go to a bar alone?

no.

Worried-Principle580 · 2021-12-24T13:45:34+00:00

When you see an attractive girl think a some sort of reasonable question to ask her (excuse me do you know if they have X here?, hi is that Y you have? Hi do you know where I can find Z). You can then gauge if it’s worth starting an actual conversation with her depending on her eye contact, smile or lack of, general acceptance of your approach. At least then you test the waters to see she finds you attractive (she should smile and give eye contact, might start fixing her hair etc.). This is a much easier approach than going all in with a compliment straight off the bat and suffer brutal rejection. If you get fuck off vibes from your initial question say thanks and leave

Chicagoj1563 · 2021-12-24T14:54:06+00:00

Just go out to the bars where they get packed on the weekends. Basically, wherever there are enough girls to approach.

Try to practice opening conversations. That’s essentially what your doing at this stage. Getting into a venue, dealing with the spotlight effect of being there alone, and learning how to open conversations with strangers.

Have a few canned openers if you want something to fall back on, but focus on just walking up with a blank mind and say whatever comes out naturally. Focus on always having fun and frame every interaction as positive, even the blowouts. Your learning a skill set, so keep that the focus. Every social interaction makes you better, even the negative ones.

Just practice the first 15 secs to 5 mins of an interaction. Get good with whatever your starting point is. Then small chunk the next bit as you progress. If your first sticking point is just getting into the venue and getting comfortable with the spotlight effect, then fine. Just show up. Then small chunk the next item your working on.

Initial-Performer987 · 2021-12-24T06:52:13+00:00

If ur going out to purposefully seek women then that’s odd as fuck to me. Literally just hang out with ur friends, live ur life. If there’s a women u see and fancy, then try talk to her. Also if ur friends think ur being creepy then u might want to revisit how u approach women because their comfort is important.

ArjunVermaReddit · 2021-12-24T18:03:02+00:00

Just go alone. Ive done it a couple times and at least managed to speak to people. Talk to guys and girls both but keep your priorities clear. Obviously wouldve helped to have a good buddy but better to go solo than with a bunch of buzzkills
Heres a really good video by A G Hayden, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VzieYD90tl4 dont overdo the channel viewing, this should just give you the motivation and make sure you dont back out. The rest is experience

fuckouttahea · 2021-12-24T19:16:52+00:00

High value post.

rahhumilovedogs · 2021-12-24T19:10:41+00:00

Talk to girls like you would anyone. I'm a f*ck boy. I just say what the F is up. Don't talk to them like they are special. Say the F is up like you would to a guy. It works bro. lol.

antonthecad · 2021-12-24T16:33:06+00:00

Congrats on taking the first step but it's reality check time. What actually makes you high value/attractive? Are these things that are attractive to women? You're better off finding out what your flaws are early on rather than have women slowly tell you through their actions over a number of years.

Mediocre-Ebb9862 · 2021-12-24T11:05:25+00:00

[permanently deleted]

stanthemilkman88 · 2021-12-24T15:21:50+00:00

Do you know that?

kingmanifestation · 2021-12-24T18:50:20+00:00

Do not over think it. Its fine to go to a bar by yourself. Women see that you are alone and are showing balls to approach her and her group all alone.

It comes off as this man knows what he wants.

Secret tip: approach or simply just speak to 5 to 10 women a day so you can "FAIL FAST", your anxiety about approaching will leave fast. Its a numbers game....Hurry up so you can demystify the game

rahhumilovedogs · 2021-12-24T19:14:38+00:00

Ok wow reading these comments... lol. Dudes wtf just chill and no games. Talk to them normally like I said in another comment. It's pretty easy if they like they do if not they don't. Just talk to them like anyone else. It's just a girl. Weird comments.

hyxhufchy66666666 · 2021-12-24T21:30:54+00:00

If you aren’t bold or take initiative then you’re not a high value man.

baddog992 · 2021-12-24T23:21:08+00:00

I've gotten laid going to a bar alone. It's not easy but can be done. The funny part is I didn't do much but look at them and talk to them. I didn't say a great pick up line. I was relaxed and just joked around with them. I try and talk to women like an attractive friend I haven't seen in a very long time. It's a little easier with a wing man. You can tell if a women is interested if she keeps eye contact with you.

When it comes to getting laid go against your base instinct. Be talkative, try to be relaxed. Women can sense when your uptight. Don't push sex on a women. It sounds counter but the less you bring it up the more likely you will get laid. Do not be pushy about sex do be flirty. If she tells you were not having sex don't plead.

AVGVSTVS_OPTIMVS · 2021-12-24T23:31:49+00:00

It projects alot of masculine confidence. Even if they reject you, there's no reason to take it personal.

socialanimal_us · 2021-12-25T02:48:55+00:00

Checkout www.YouTube.com/socialanimal - you ll find inspiration :)

Adventurous_Card_144 · 2021-12-25T05:09:12+00:00

I'm against to what most people say about not going out as an activity. It is only weird af if you have weird af intentions. If you go with the mindset of getting better, being more social, (instead of where can I put my wiener), then it is 1000% better than the advise of "going to a coffee" or "do it as a lifestyle".

I don't do it as a lifestyle cause I have things to do and cannot afford to make what was supposed to be a 10 minute walk into a 2 hour conversation with a stranger that got to nowhere.

This is only strange af if you let it be strange af. And bro, in some sense, this is strange AF, like, it is weird to pull a new girl every month at the very least when you are decent. It is weird to kiss with a hot girl in less than 10 seconds, and the stories you'll have to tell I can assure you nobody is going to believe them.

Who does all of that? Virtually no men. So of course you'll have to look "odd" to some people. That's cool, I can leave my ego at the door and be the "odd" guy. In fact, I was the odd guy for 3 years while I sucked. Some of my buddies used to mock me about it. Guess who they go to when they want to pickup girls now? These guys even complimented me one night and apologized for telling me I was weird at the time.

If you can, don't go out alone. Get some friends, meet them at a "lair" or however that's called nowadays. They are weird, yeah, but they are on the same mission as you. Cooperate with them, and befriend those who align with your personal vibe and interests. It is going to motivate you to go out more if you have someone who is on the same path, and who you can see progress and rival with.

The thing that is going to set you up for success in cold approach is consistency and focused practice time. Dedicate time each day to do this, then move on with your day if you have to. I don't talk to girls when I do my everyday stuff unless I really like a particular girl. I schedule a time to kill it, and am sure you will be too with time!

RoseTinted64 · 2021-12-26T05:39:59+00:00

Going to a bar alone is fine. Find yourself a group that is focused on meeting girls. Going out with guys who are not into game is a total drag, even if they are your close friends. Go to a bar.

Title	Okay - I’m going to start cold approaching
Author	xSathya
Upvotes	159
Comments	75
Date	December 24, 2021 6:41 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/rng9td/okay_im_going_to_start_cold_approaching/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/okay-im-going-to-start-cold-approaching.1270346 https://theredarchive.com/post/1270346

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