Common misconceptions about picking up girls:

Friends First:

This is a common mistake that I think we all tend to fall into from time to time. Even I sometimes make this mistake, especially when I am a little rusty after exiting a somewhat long-term type of relationship.

This is when you have the idea that being friends with a girl will help you create a bond that will, in time, lead to her wanting to be with you. All though this might work occasionally, it is a very bad guideline for finding a mate efficiently.

Most women know whether they would sleep with you within the first 30 seconds of meeting you and most women are more likely to get in a relationship with someone that they have already slept with.

So I strongly advise against trying to play the friend role right off the bat. Because this will most likely lead to disappointment and getting friend-zoned.

Friend-zoned: A zone women will put a guy in that they have no intention of getting romantically or sexually involved with.

Nice guy:

Let's say you manage to get a date with a girl and are hanging out. You might be worried about scaring her away by coming off too strong and in turn decide to play the nice guy. You do this because you think it will make her comfortable and lead to more.

This may work with some girls but it is an unnecessary way to get a girl and, in my opinion, not very effective. It will make you come off boring, make you look like a wuss and result in you never getting a phone call for a follow up date.

What you should do to combat this: I think it is best to focus on getting a girl to talk about herself mostly and keep the topic positive while being playful and teasing. You can do this by asking open ended questions and making statements.

Open ended question: Questions that don't have yes or no answers.

Statement: Telling her something.

Ex: "My friend from highschool was in town a few days ago. I haven't seen him in years. It was good to see him after all this time."

I believe in chemistry. Some people don't have the best chemistry and with experience and experimentation you will learn how to build chemistry. Yet in the beginning you should focus on the girls who are most naturally attracted to you or in otherwords, have the most chemistry.

If a girl is making it difficult to build rapport and not wanting to know much about you then that is in my oppinion, a difficult mate to be happy with, even if you do manage to build a relationship with her.

Not knowing when to kiss:

This can be tricky. What I've learned is that some girls just don't kiss on the first date. If they pull this then I will never pursue that girl again. I do this because I feel like if a girl isn't going to let me kiss her, then she probably doesn't have a very high opinion of me. I don't believe in trying to convince a girl to like me. I've never had a good time with a girl who's done this so I don't intend on repeating the same mistakes.

Most guys will end up pursuing them after and just get used for free drinks, flaked on and feed the girl's ego by showing her that she can toy around with this guy without actually giving anything in exchange.

What you should do: I like to talk with a girl for about 30-45 mins before I move in for a kiss. When I do this I'll will isolate her in an empty bar or on a bench in a park, etc. I then will take her hand and pull her close to me. I look into her eyes and get close to her. Judging by how she acts when I do this will show me if she is going to allow me to kiss her.

It's pretty obvious whether she wants you to kiss her. If she doesn't, she will usually pull away when nearing her face or state that she doesn't want to kiss yet.

If she puts up a fight then I will tell her I need to be somewhere and end the date. If she doesn't then I will obviously kiss her.

Keep in mind that I will usually have 3 or 4 dates lined up on my days off. Each within 2 hours of each other. These dates are all set up for girls whose numbers I acquired on the street in between work or that I acquired while barhopping on the weekends with my buddies.

Not standing up for yourself:

"Checking" a girl on something she does that you don't like is very important.

This is when a girl is doing something annoying or disrespectful that you don't like. Which is usually a time when she tests you to see if you will react or just be a push over. One example is allowing a girl to boss you around.

What you should do: You should tell her not to do this when it occurs. This is important because it will help maintain a balance of respect.

If a girl thinks you are a push over then she will quickly lose interest. You don't have to get mad, just tell her not to do what she is doing because you are not the kind of person who will put up with it. If she is attracted to you enough then she will respect your feelings and stop whatever nonsense she is doing.

There are many things to list regarding this topic. However I think these are the most common and as long as you keep these things in perspective then it will have a positive impact on your dating life.

Now go meet some girls and best of luck.

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