Male loneliness just means you are weak. Therefore it’s not real

Safinated · 2024-03-26T17:59:44+00:00

Having unmet desires is normal, not weak. That’s how you get motivated

Bekiala · 2024-03-26T18:00:32+00:00

I don't think men being lonely is weak; it is just human. Maybe there is someone sometime who didn't feel loneliness but I would think they were just amazingly lucky rather than strong.

Maybe I am nit-picking or getting into semantics but to me, being human means you get to experience any number of crappy emotions. It is inevitable.

Hmmm . . . . on the other hand if I get up and get doing something/anything, I'm happier and often I don't. Maybe there is some rationale in the "weak" argument.

Off to check out my Dad's billing for his iPhone, do some exercise and make a bed.

EvilManDevil · 2024-03-26T18:33:59+00:00

PS5 doesn't care if I'm weak

Steakman1 · 2024-03-26T18:11:35+00:00

Not being lonely isn’t as simple as just having others around you. There can be people with social circles and marriages who still feel lonely because they feel like nobody truly understands them. And I think a large part of that reasoning can be due to this “pull yourself up by the boostraps” mentality pushed on men. Men are still going to feel negative emotions regardless of whether others are aware of it or not. We will all feel sad, angry, bummed, or whatever at some point in our lives, regardless of our gender, unless we are fortunate enough to live perfect lives. But men will be told that they are weak or less of a man for having these emotions.

Having a bunch of people know and like this exterior persona you put on isn’t going to do much for your lonliness if deep down you are suffering in silence. And we have big name examples of this such as Robin Williams and Chester Bennington. They had the fame, wealth, status, and people who adored them. Yet they both killed themselves.

This isn’t to say that all lonely people are lonely because of these reasons. But to say being lonely just means your weak and that real lonliness doesn’t exist, I would disagree with.

Aafan_Barbarro · 2024-03-26T17:57:51+00:00

You need some deeper thoughts, this is very basic.

Wowhowcanubsodumb · 2024-03-26T18:05:45+00:00

Lol your transformative thought is typical movie villain binary strength/weakness paradigm? You're either strong or you're weak, that's just how it is?

If your argument is that loneliness is not real because it is caused by weakness, I mean that's just not how words work. Like, if you wanted to say loneliness is caused by weakness, I wouldn't agree with you but at least that's how words work.

By your logic AIDS isn't a thing because it's caused by HIV. And by your "logic" I mean the tenuous grasp you have on the concept of language

oooo020201lfl · 2024-03-26T18:05:28+00:00

Cringe

mrcs84usn · 2024-03-26T18:44:21+00:00

Sounds like the Cliffs Notes version of the most rudimentary RP advice. I guess you have that going for you.

neinhaltchad · 2024-03-26T19:50:31+00:00

So wait men are about being “weak” for merely desiring basic human connection and sexual intimacy?

How about, panhandling for money on Reddit, asking repeatedly how to “make women cum” and pleading with strangers for help on how to looksmaxx?

🥹😂🤣

Does that also make one “weak”?

And look, no shade on any of it. We’re all “weak” in our own ways, but in 2024 to be doing shit like “calling out” men for weakness for having basic fucking human desires is pretty goddamn low.

SlowEffective8146 · 2024-03-26T23:20:10+00:00

Men get no empathy, even from men

Tokimonatakanimekat · 2024-03-26T17:50:15+00:00

Men ain't allowed to fully utilize their strength in modern society though.

Can't even righteously duel some mf without police shooting my ass full of new holes.

Kim8mi · 2024-03-26T18:36:09+00:00

Honestly these arguments don't make much sense to me, maybe because I'm not native, what exactly is your point here?

Balochim · 2024-03-26T18:41:03+00:00

There are many flaws in your reasoning, here let me share a few:

Having random conversations, philosophical pursuits, etc. doesn’t replace having a romantic partner. You say “make your own meaning” but the vast majority of people I know derive a huge amount of “meaning” from their partners. If you look at how they spend their time, how they make decisions in life, and so on, it’s clear their relationship with their partner is the most important thing for most of them.

Just about everyone understands that that they aren’t owed sex, love, or a purpose in life. Frankly I almost exclusively only hear this brought up by misandrists who have a habit getting fixated on these weird delusions about “the patriarchy”.

Meanwhile, as a human who’s existed for a few decades and been good friends with a number of women, it’s super fucking obvious women do not face these same struggles. Of course, there are all sorts of uniquely shitty aspects to being a woman too, but dating struggles are not even remotely comparable. Maybe that’s why men find these posts that accuse men of being “weak” and needing to “work harder” so completely obnoxious.

Electric_Death_1349 · 2024-03-26T18:41:46+00:00

If “life is suffering” then what the fuck is the point?

PMmeareasontolive · 2024-03-26T19:42:06+00:00

I think I understand what you are getting at. It's an existentialist point of view; life is what you make it, and you are responsible for what you make it (responsible for your own choices). Therefor you have to choose things which make life meaningful for you. No one else can give that to you.

I agree to a point, however, I think it is difficult these days because so much is changing and uprooted. It's hard to feel part of a community, for example, or you may move far away from friends and family and have to constantly be starting over. Lots of the old behaviors dont' work anymore, you have to change and put in more effort to make friends, find partners, etc.

Lots of people feel alienated in the modern world. The "male loneliness" debate is a good one because it causes people to redefine what we value, want we really want, whether or not our environments, including our traditional views or stereotypes, support that, etc. Yes, it devolves into whining easily, but it's still an important conversation to have, and keep going.

ArtifactFan65 · 2024-03-26T22:38:14+00:00

I never understand why people say something isn't real just because it can be beaten 🤣 People always say this with depression as well, it's peak human solipsism.

Although I agree if you are strong, healthy and resourceful enough you can fix a lot of problems like loneliness. Everything in life is a competition/survival of the fittest and the winners get all the prizes, losers go home empty handed.

izzzy12k · 2024-03-26T18:31:42+00:00

It's not about weakness or strength.. Those are cop outs from acknowledging the real problem.

There's a huge difference between relationships with family, friends, and intimate partners.

Having any less than all three in your life in one form or another will always create a form of loneliness..

Some of which can't be corrected.. Ask those who have lost their parents or siblings.

Others can be corrected, but not until they can locate someone who would want to fill that bill..

Which is where the problem lies. Fix this, and maybe you'll have a chance.. but for some, unfortunately it's just not realistically possible.

teball3 · 2024-03-26T19:44:10+00:00

If the reason is not have deep intense emotional bonds with people or not having love. That’s valid.

Conversation over? Yes, this is the point.

Me not personnally owing a child in africa an enchilida is completely irrelevant to global starvation. When you mix the personal and the societal, you can only come up with 1 solution, the worst solution to any societal problem: "Pull yourself up by your bootstraps". This has never, in the history of the planet, solved a societal woe. The male loneliness epidemic is not going to have solutions as easy as those for global starvation, but that doesn't mean it isn't worth trying.

A lot of men are acting like victims. You are only hurting yourself.

Pushing for things that would make things easier is harder than acting like it isn't happening. Suffering in silence makes everything worse, for all parties. Self-advocacy is how you help yourself. You have done nothing, and you are all out of ideas, not because you are strong, but because you think you are. This entire hyper-individualist take on a societal problem misses the mark.

Admitting weakness takes strength. You can't learn what you think you already know, and you can't grow strong by thinking you already are.

Stealing an old comment of mine to show you what societal answers to societal problems looks like:

6 things I think could be done to help the "male loneliness epidemic" that do not require forcing women to do anything, and furthermore I think would make women happier too:

-The return of "third places". A little nebulous and vague, but has been talked about to death elsewhere.

-Community gyms. I think every community that has a library should have a free gym.

-Actual efforts to reduce casual misandry and heteropessimism. Right now, both of those are social cancers that barely have names, let alone efforts to call them out and stop them.

-(this one might be a little controversial) more sexualization of men's bodies in media. Whereas women are often hyper-sexualized, men are undersexualized. I think a good deal of this came from a lot of homophobia by men made productions, but now that people are a lot more accepting of that, why not throw in equal amounts of eye-candy?

-a better economy.

-A dating app non-profit that doesn't make it's money by trying to keep people on it for as long as possible.

SupposedlySapiens · 2024-03-26T20:03:14+00:00

“Transformative thoughts” 😂😂

AstronautExisting230 · 2024-03-26T20:17:02+00:00

"weak" is a social construct defined by whomever sets the gender norms. A redpiller might say a man not getting angry is weak, but a feminist might say a man letting his anger out is weak. They're both sexist, stupid and arbitrary ways to shame a complex multi-faceted person.

Having feelings is normal and healthy, and expressing them in a normal non violent way is good. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Appropriate-Ad-8030 · 2024-03-27T02:59:25+00:00

I don’t know how people in this sub consistently slog through troughs of bullshit like that….

LuckyKirito · 2024-03-27T15:38:59+00:00

God said everyone deserves to be loved. Op thinks different

LuckyKirito · 2024-03-27T15:41:23+00:00

Nothing strange dude if you’re born with like 2/10 looks you go to gym you get max to 4-5/10. Then you get gf who’s like 3-4 at best. What’s good in that? People feel naturally that they have been disadvantaged since they were born. None of it is fair and some cases can’t be solved by being strong and “fixing yourself”

HomeworkFew2187 · 2024-03-26T18:02:31+00:00

your points about not being entitled to anything were good and most of the post was.

But also proved a point that purple piller couldn't fathom. Men are the ones that enforce mocking men for being weak

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2024-03-26T19:54:49+00:00

I do not feel loneliness, and thus, I have a lack of will to power. I will never possess the same strength as a man who feels lonely because they have the incentive to continue fighting. Not everything is within a man’s control, such as nepotism and genetics, which provide leverage.

Some of the strongest men I know are lonely due to their principles. They refuse to participate in this hedonic sludge of a culture and, as a result, miss out on proper social interactions. You can't exactly relate to a generation of trend followers if you do not watch TikTok and Netflix.

A stoic does not nullify his emotions but rationally judges and reacts to them. Finding comfort in solitude is not necessarily stoic, as it can lead you down the dark path of social nihilism. Your loneliness guides you towards family, community, legacy and god. I advise you to never abandon it

obviousredflag · 2024-03-27T13:18:34+00:00

But it can be done. A lot of men are acting like victims. You are only hurting yourself.

I just had a lengthy discussion with a guy who is lonely, completely socially isolated for 2 decades due to social anxiety, depression and compounding effects. He doesn't even have online friends. He very much views himself as a victim.

He thinks it's impossible to ever just have a conversation with anyone in real life because of anxiety.

This is not a case for "pull yourself up by the bootstraps". This is a mental health case for therapy by a professional, possibly over years. But the anxiety is probably in the way of looking for help. That there is no family who cares for him probably hints at some other mental health issues as well. This guy is just fucked. All he has left is wallow in sadness and moan about the unfairness of life.

Telling him he is weak doesn't change anything. He knows he is weak. That is why he can't help himself out of this.

RedditAlt999 · 2024-03-27T19:30:14+00:00

For the premise. Let’s assume we are talking about men living in populated areas.

Therefore literally no man in that situation is alone.

You're equating physical loneliness with emotional loneliness. Anyone could feel lonely in a subway car full of people. Are you implying that's impossible?

goonmaniangooner · 2024-03-29T18:32:44+00:00

People are lonely because industrial society and progress have made all the things that humans pride themselves over like love, empathy, community and family etc vestigial. It's zoochosis people are dealing with, more people in the cage won't fix the problem. Adapting to it may end in a more dysgenic outcome than simply joining the 70% club. Now if you excuse me, your take was so basic and shit I had to comment on it with my porn account.

Rashaun25 · 2024-04-04T00:08:37+00:00

Perfectly said.

Legitimate_Type_1324 · 2024-03-26T18:53:43+00:00

I agree.

Male loneliness is a documented phenomenon that arises when men are surveyed about their relationship status and sex life etc etc etc.

It's up to you, entirely up to you, to do something about it. You can have an external locus of control, bitching about the system, the culture and wanking yourself raw imagining fantasies of social engineering where some invisible force ends up in you being assigned a big tiddy virgin waifu, or you can accept reality as it is, grab it by the pussy, take control and play your best game with the hand you have been given, because goddammit the bar is very fucking low and you have more knowledge and tools at your fingertips than what the whole humanity ever had through out it's history.

Motherfuckers I was born in a fucking South American shithole to a middle lower class family, went to a shitty fucking university no one gives a fuck about and I now live in a condo in front of the sea in the Mediterranean with a beautiful European wife, a baby on the way, 1 million net worth and a successful business. No one gave me a FUCK.

Every guy from India, South Africa, Mexico, Colombia, Vietnam, Philippines etc etc going out there and making it BIG, while you had the luck to be born in the world's most important country where most millionaires are made. You have no excuse.

g-panda101 · 2024-03-26T18:05:02+00:00

Weak man hard times

apresonly · 2024-03-26T22:28:08+00:00

this is an example of the "toxic masculinity" we are trying to get men to divest from.

every human being on the planet experiences loneliness from time to time, even if they are surrounded by family, a husband/wife, or can get all the casual sex they want.

loneliness is part of being human.

Its uncomfortable but you sit with it for a bit and then it goes away. maybe you take a walk outside or make plans to meet up with a friend. it's not a permanent state of being.

and if you do need more social support to be healthy, there is no reason these relationships need to be romantic. romantic love has nothing to do with whether you are lonely or not lonely (since everyone is lonely from time to time).

Title	Male loneliness just means you are weak. Therefore it’s not real
Author	berichorbeburied
Upvotes	0
Comments	91
Date	March 26, 2024 5:40 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1bodwno/male_loneliness_just_means_you_are_weak_therefore/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/male-loneliness-just-means-you-are-weak-therefore.1513299 https://theredarchive.com/post/1513299

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